Caelyn was gone, and I leaned back against the cold porcelain of the bathtub. This wasn’t happening.
Bell gave my arm a squeeze. “Want me to help you up so you can brush your teeth?”
I nodded woodenly. I went through the motions of cleaning up in a daze, nothing really penetrating my brain. When I was done, I sat right back on the tile floor. The coolness of it seemed to help my nausea and my panic. And the last thing I wanted to do was puke on my living room rug.
I counted to ten repeatedly. I sang the alphabet backwards in my head. Anything to keep myself from going crazy with what-ifs. It wouldn’t help anything to play that game. I might just have food poisoning.
Ten minutes felt like ten hours, but eventually, Caelyn bustled back through the door. “I got three different brands so we have the best chance of accuracy. Do you think you can pee?”
I nodded. I’d force it from my body if I had to. I needed to know. Caelyn handed me a small paper bag and gave me an encouraging smile. It was the same one she gave to Ava before her soccer games, even though Ava had yet to make a goal or catch a pass. The thought made me want to laugh, but I knew I would only sound hysterical, so I choked it back.
I closed the bathroom door and searched through the bag. My hands trembled as I opened each box and struggled to hold the directions steady. I did my business, capping each test and resting them on the side of the bathtub. I opened the door and met my friends’ nervous gazes. “Can someone put three minutes on their phone?”
Bell pulled hers out and tapped the screen a few times. “Got it.”
“Thank you.” We all stood in the hallway, just staring at each other.
Caelyn reached out and twined her fingers with mine. “Are you okay?”
“Not really. I can’t think about it until I know for sure one way or the other.”
She nodded, and we were all silent again. I fought the urge to pace up and down the hall, knowing it would just drive my anxiety higher.
Bell’s phone let out a cascading set of dings. “Time.”
I swallowed against my suddenly dry throat. “I don’t know if I can look.”
Caelyn moved in close. “We’re with you. No matter what. You’re not alone.”
Bell nodded. “You’re never alone.”
Tears burned the backs of my eyes. “Thank you.” The two words came out on a hoarse whisper. I moved into the bathroom and picked up the first test with shaky hands. A bright pink plus sign. I moved to the second. Two distinct blue lines. And the last. A very clear pregnant in black lettering.
My breath left me in a whoosh, my hand instantly going to my stomach. Pregnant. There was a child growing inside me. My brain and heart jumped from emotion to emotion, not knowing where to land. Fear. Hope. Panic. Joy. They all clawed for dominance inside me.
“Kenna?” Caelyn asked tentatively.
The tears that had been gathering spilled over. “I’m pregnant.”
Bell looked slightly panicked. “Are those happy tears or sad ones? I can’t tell.”
“Happy and terrified out of my mind tears,” I said on a choked laugh. I was going to have a second chance at being a mom. How could I not be overjoyed at that? Something I worried might never come. Doctors had told me I might have trouble getting pregnant, but apparently, Crosby had super sperm.
I froze. “Crosby.” I said his name on a whisper, my chest constricting in a painful squeeze as my hand went to my still-flat belly. He didn’t want children. But would he still feel that way when he knew we’d created a human being together? My eyes fell closed as I sent up a silent prayer that he would love this child as much as I already did. That he would want to be in his or her life.
“Come on.” Caelyn gently guided me into the living room and helped me settle on the couch. A few seconds later, she pushed a glass of water into my hands. “Take slow, small sips.”
I did as instructed. The cool water tasted like heaven on my abused throat. “I have to tell him.”
Caelyn eyed me cautiously. “You do…but you have time. You don’t have to run over there tonight. Take a few days to process it yourself first.”
She was right. I needed to get my head on straight before I told Crosby. And what if I lost this child like I had before? My chest constricted in a tight squeeze. I wasn’t sure I would survive it. Because I knew one thing for certain…I already loved this baby beyond measure.
Bell’s gaze hardened on me, misinterpreting the fear in my eyes. “If he’s an asshole about it, screw him. We’ll be the best aunties this little bub has ever had. We’re so awesome, there’s no need for a dad.”
I choked on a half-laugh, half-sob. “I’m so lucky to have you both. Thank you for everything.”
Caelyn eased down next to me on the couch. “We’re here for you. Always.”
And I would be forever grateful for that fact. But it didn’t stop my heart from hoping that Crosby would find a way to be there, too.
47
Crosby
Grant Abbot looked smug. Too smug. And the smarmy smirk on his face set my nerves on edge. I didn’t think Judge Moore could be bought or threatened into a particular verdict, but everyone had a breaking point.
I glanced back at the gallery. Kenna’s eyes were shut as if she were praying or meditating or just trying to find a moment of peace before the chaos that was to come. God, she was beautiful. Even without being able to see those amber eyes that pulled at my soul, she was the most gorgeous creature I’d ever seen. It wasn’t her smooth, golden skin, or her rich, mahogany hair that hung in loose waves around her face. It wasn’t the perfect cheekbones or those luscious, berry lips. It was the way she glowed from the inside out. The light that radiated from within called to me, smoothed all my hard edges and calmed the frenetic pace of my internal energy. She balanced me in the best possible ways. And I knew I did the same for her.
Emotion clogged my throat as Kenna opened her eyes, those amber orbs staring straight into me as if she knew it all and accepted me anyway. I loved this woman. And she loved me. Just as I was. She wasn’t going to try to change me or force me to live a life I didn’t want. Kenna simply wanted an existence where we were together.
I could see it in a way I was afraid to reach for before. Growing old together, adding to the beautiful history of The Gables. I could picture Kenna chasing children around that grassy yard, providing a home for kids in the foster system. None of that would keep me from my moments of freedom. From chasing the high of a rock-climbing session or the thrill of barreling down a mountain on a bike. It would simply give me a place and a family to come home to.
Kenna hadn’t looked away, our connection a live thing pulsing between us. Kenna had been my home from the moment she truly let me into her world. And I had thrown that aside like a toddler who hadn’t gotten his way. God, I was an idiot. Worse than that, I’d been careless with the person who meant the most to me in this world. I had been so caught up in making sure I couldn’t be tied down by anyone or anything that I’d lost the most amazing thing to ever happen to me.
I stepped forward, opening my mouth to say something, I wasn’t even sure what, when the bailiff spoke. “All rise.”
Kenna’s eyes flickered with something that looked a lot like hope, and I had to force myself to turn away from the emotion and face the front of the courtroom. I felt as if I’d been sucker punched in the ribs, unable to focus or take a full breath. All I could think about was how I was going to fix things with Kenna.
I gave my head a good shake, trying to get my eyes to zero in on Judge Moore. The pissed-off look on the man’s face had me snapping out of my haze. I gave a quick glance over my shoulder. Kenna looked worried now. I felt a clawing urge inside to go to her, to comfort her. But I couldn’t, not now. She had her support crew. They’d come in full force. Bell, Caelyn, Ford, and Hunter. Even Bell’s father, Dr. Kipton, who had been Harriet’s doctor, was in attendance.
I forced my gaze back to Judge Moore. When he sat, the rest of the cou
rt followed suit. He cleared his throat, studying all the faces in the courtroom, one by one. “I apologize for the delay in today’s proceedings, but unfortunately, the sheriff had to be called out to my home this morning.”
I stiffened, glancing over at the Abbots’ side of the court. Grant and Ben Hotchkiss shared a look, but it was a wary one. As Grant turned his gaze back to the judge, a muscle in his cheek ticked. What the hell was going on?
Judge Moore’s gaze hardened as he looked around the room. “I do not take attempted bribery lightly.”
Someone who sounded a lot like Caelyn let out a gasp behind me. My stomach sank. Grant was messing with the system. If we were lucky, he’d tried to influence the judge in his favor. But if he was really clever, he might’ve sent a false message from our camp, leading the judge to believe that we were trying to influence the outcome of the trial.
The judge kept speaking. “As we speak, sheriff’s deputies are collecting evidence, and we will find whoever tried to exert undue influence over this court. And they will be prosecuted to the full extent of the law.”
Moore directed his stare at Grant and Hotchkiss as he spoke, and my shoulders eased a fraction. But even as they did, my blood began to heat. This prick thought he could buy the ruling he wanted, just like he’d bought everything else in his life. His family solved every problem by throwing money or power at it. But I had a feeling that would come to an end today.
I grinned at Grant, knowing my smile was just a bit feral. His gaze narrowed at me, the purplish-green bruise around his eye making the action look ridiculous. For the first time in his life, Grant Abbot was going to hear the word no.
“I’m ready to make my ruling.”
“Your Honor,” Hotchkiss began. “Given these new developments, should we consider postponing the ruling?”
“No,” Judge Moore stated with finality. “Unless you are calling into question my ability to be objective. Are you calling that into question, Mr. Hotchkiss?”
“No, of course not, Your Honor.”
“Good. Then let’s get this over with. I’m about done with this whole farce.”
I fought to hold in my chuckle but could hear a quiet snort from Bell’s direction directly behind me. Apparently, Judge Moore was done with the Abbots and all of their bullshit.
Moore clasped his hands and set them on his desk. “On the validity of Harriet Abbot’s last will and testament, I find with the defendant. The will holds.” Grant looked about ready to throttle the judge. “If it were up to me, I would have you and your parents stripped of the inheritance you are getting. But I don’t have that kind of authority. What I am ruling is that you will cover all of Crosby McCoy’s legal fees.”
Judge Moore turned to face me. “Mr. McCoy, please submit your billable hours to the court and Mr. Hotchkiss by the end of the week.”
“Yes, Your Honor.”
“Court is adjourned.”
With a snap of the gavel, it was all over. I pushed to my feet, turning to see Kenna enveloped in hug after hug. I stood back with a smile, watching the woman who meant everything to me be surrounded by love and support. And now, she could keep her home, her safe place, as well.
As the final well-wisher released Kenna, she turned to me. I rounded the small wooden fence that separated the courtroom and pulled her into my arms. I didn’t care that we hadn’t sorted things between us, I needed to hold her. “It’s yours, Brown Eyes. No one can ever take it away.”
Her hands circled my waist, fisting in my suit jacket. “Thank you, Crosby. For everything.” Her voice was hoarse, barely audible over the emotion crowding her words.
“Anything for you.”
Kenna pulled back, searching my face for the meaning behind my words. I couldn’t give her that here. But I would, as soon as possible. I tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “Can we talk later? I can come over to The Gables.”
Kenna nodded. “I’ll be home. I’m just going to stop and get some boxes on the way. I want to declutter my house before I even think about moving into the main estate.”
I chuckled. “Your place is neat as a pin. I doubt there are more than three superfluous things in that house.”
Kenna grinned, releasing me. “You’d be surprised. My clutter is just organized.” She paused for a moment, a look of uncertainty overtaking her face. “See you later?”
“I’ll be there.” I pushed all of the assurance I could into those words, begging her to read the hope she should have in them.
“I’ll be waiting.” She pushed to her tiptoes and pressed her lips against my stubbled cheek. “Thank you again.”
“You bitch.”
I jerked at the fury in Grant’s voice, turning and instantly putting myself between him and Kenna. “You’re going to want to take a step back before you’re arrested for harassment. Or worse, assault.”
Grant glared at me, his hatred twisting his features. “That money-grubbing whore stole what belongs to me.”
Bell peeked around Kenna and me before Ford could stop her. “I’m pretty sure the only money-grubbing whore around here is you.”
“Money never could buy you class, Isabelle,” Grant retorted.
“Oh, go take a long walk off a short pier,” Bell shot back.
Ford wrapped an arm around his fiancée’s shoulders. “All right, Trouble. You’ve said your piece.”
“I don’t know,” Dr. Kipton interjected. “I was kind of enjoying watching my daughter put this greedy bastard in his place.”
Our group laughed, but Grant turned a startling shade of red. “Watch your backs. All of you.”
Kenna stiffened behind me, the tension radiating out of her muscles and into mine. I wrapped an arm around her shoulders. “Don’t listen, there’s nothing else they can do.”
Hotchkiss stepped forward, ushering Grant down the aisle. “I wouldn’t be so sure about that.”
Kenna sighed, collapsing into me. “Will this never be over?”
I turned, cupping her face in my hands. “It is over. Grant is pissed, but I bet anything, come Monday, he’ll be on the first ferry out of here. If not sooner.”
She looked over my shoulder to where Grant and Hotchkiss had disappeared. “I hope you’re right.”
48
Kenna
I hauled the box off the kitchen counter and set it on the floor. Harriet’s kitchen was stocked to the gills with the best gadgets and gizmos money could buy. I wouldn’t need duplicates of everything I already had, so off to Habitat For Humanity it was going.
I picked up a platter from the island, smiling down at it. There were two sets of handprints. Mine and Harriet’s. She’d taken me to the paint-your-own-pottery place in town not long after I’d moved in with her, wanting us to do something special to mark the occasion. We’d made this platter, where our handprints had been turned into flowers.
The paint job was sloppy. The leaves looked more like blobs, and the bee looked more like a rabid bird. But Harriet had told me that the mess was part of the fun, that we were making a memory, and that’s what mattered. I lifted the plate, hugging it to my chest. “I wish you were still here. God, I could use one of our swing sessions right about now.”
I wanted to tell her about the baby and ask for her wisdom on how to break the news to Crosby. But most of all, I wanted the comfort of her presence. I closed my eyes, hugging the platter harder as if that might make her come alive. I sighed as my eyes opened. I couldn’t bring Harriet back. But she was all around me. In her favorite garden beds and the antique treasures she’d collected to celebrate the island’s history. In the scarred butcher block in the kitchen, where each nick told the story of time spent together or in care of the ones she loved. But most of all, she was in the bones of every structure of this estate, the safe place she had created for a girl who’d had no real home. Her spirit would live on in this home and in me.
I grinned down at the plate, setting it back on the counter. Part of Harriet’s wishes were already coming true. I
was going to build a family here. My hand went to my belly. “You and me, B. It’s going to be a hell of an adventure.”
A knock sounded at the door, and I glanced at my watch. It was too early for Crosby, but my stomach did a flip nonetheless, wondering if he’d wrapped things up ahead of schedule. I pulled the door open to find someone who was definitely not Crosby. “Janet. What are you doing here?”
She tossed her red hair over one shoulder. “I just came to tell my baby girl goodbye. I’m heading back to the mainland. This island is too claustrophobic.”
I blinked back at her. It was always the same, she’d come tearing through my life, destroying things left and right, and then act as if nothing had happened. It wasn’t worth it to try and get into the pain she caused or attempt to make her see the consequences of her actions. It would be a waste of energy and precious time. “Drive safely.” I glanced past her to see a cab idling. “Wait. What happened to your new car?”
Her lips pursed. “I might’ve spent some money before I should’ve. I had to return it.”
Apparently, Grant’s bribe came with a money-back guarantee. I grinned. Served the woman right.
Janet looked over to the main house. “Don’t you want to get rid of this monstrosity? You could get a great condo in a Seattle high-rise.” She flashed me a grin. “Maybe get me one across the hall…we could hang all of the time. Really reconnect.”
I swallowed back my snort of laughter. “I think I’ll pass.”
Janet shrugged. “I had to give it one more try. I’ll see you around, Doodle Bug.”
I cringed at the nickname she’d called me throughout my childhood, but Janet missed the reaction, already heading back to the sedan with a wave of her fingers. I stared as the cab disappeared down the gravel drive. I’d never understood how I could’ve come from her. Janet was careless with her affections and her animosity, flitting back and forth between the two like a tennis player trying to cover both sides of the court.
Perfect Wreckage (The Wrecked Series Book 2) Page 26