She shook the recollections of him from her mind. He was no more than a friend, but a friend was what she needed most. And having him for an ally had eased the awareness that Tenney didn’t want her.
Devlin counted her a comrade and that was more value than a betrothed who considered her a burden.
‘I sent the letter.’
He raised a brow.
‘I sent the letter to Ambrose.’ Yes, she would call him Ambrose to herself when she wished. He had said it would be romantic to wait until their wedding night to call each other by first names and endearments. She stifled a gasp that she had agreed to such a thing.
Devlin watched her and she could tell he was aware of her gasp. ‘So, you must care for him.’
She saw that he’d misinterpreted her action.
‘Not any more. I told him we must discuss our feelings in person. My mother is having a soirée next week and I had expected to announce the date of my marriage. He was to be there and I told him he must attend. I don’t think he planned to be present when he wrote the letter, but it is important to my mother, and Ambrose and I must have a chance to speak with each other.’
Devlin’s jaw tightened, but then he relaxed and spoke in measured tones. ‘Don’t forget that you are to evaluate your interests first. Don’t be soft-hearted.’
She put her head down, shaking it an infinitesimal amount. ‘I keep thinking he would never be such a boor. Yet I know now our betrothal was a mistake. A man who cared anything for me would have broached the subject with me, instead of dumping all the blame at my—’
Devlin grunted.
She raised her eyes to his. She couldn’t read his feelings and yet she could. She knew his opinion of Ambrose well.
‘Would I be able to have an invitation?’ he asked.
‘My mother would be honoured to have you.’ The weight of the event lifted from her heart as if carried by angel wings.
‘I would be the one honoured to be in your presence.’
The statement created edgy happiness inside her and freed her from guarding her speech.
‘I so dread the next meeting with him. I never want to be near him again. I read the letter yet once more after we spoke and I cannot find any explanation other than he hopes I will end the betrothal.’ She needed him to grasp how she felt. ‘I have not failed and, yet, I have.’
‘How can you say that?’
‘Either I waited needlessly for a man who did not truly care for me, or I inadvertently caused him to fall out of love.’
His eyes narrowed. ‘Don’t take the blame for all the ills in the world. No one is strong enough to bear the burden for every wrong and no one should have to.’
‘I waited patiently.’
‘You can’t undo the past. You must go forward.’
‘Spoken like a rake.’
‘A rake who sleeps like a babe.’
‘Because you have never lost your heart.’
He took her hand, touching the finger where the stone had rested, uniting them in a way she didn’t think she’d ever connected with Ambrose.
‘Did you lose your heart to him. Truly?’ he asked.
‘A little bit of it. But not the whole. Maybe half.’ She shuddered. ‘Not the best half.’ She held up her little finger. ‘About this much. One sneeze and it’s gone.’
‘It’ll likely grow again, bigger and healthier than ever.’
‘Not for him. Now I am more irritated at myself for waiting all these years than I am for anything else. I’m wondering if...’ she hated to admit it ‘...if I did not push him to wed because I didn’t want to marry him either. And why did I not see that? I don’t know who to be angriest at. Him or myself.’
‘I can answer that for you. Him.’
She pressed her lips firmly together.
‘The sooner you get over the anger, the better off you’ll be,’ he said. ‘But, please, before you toss Tenney from your life, let him believe you’re not breaking the betrothal. If he thinks he’s not getting what he wants, you’ll be more likely to witness his true self and you’ll be able to put him behind you so much faster.’
‘I’d hoped it was all a misunderstanding, but now, even if it is, I can’t go forward with a wedding.’
He clasped the fourth finger on her left hand. ‘I would never wish for you to wed a person who doesn’t cherish you. Sharing a home with a person who finds reason to disparage you is like having shoes with thorns in them. It doesn’t matter how sturdy your shoe is, or how shiny, or how well-crafted it is, it’s still going to be an uneasy stride.’
She raised a brow, her words light, but with an undercurrent of directness. ‘Are you happy?’
Something passed behind his eyes. A barrier she’d never seen before, but then it faded.
‘Happiness? All that matters is how I can put other people at ease. It is natural to me and I’m fortunate I inherited the ability. As the eldest child, I’m to be the protector of our family name. To smooth things over.’
‘Are you happy?’ she repeated, a challenge in her voice.
‘I never think about whether I am or not. Happiness isn’t part of my role in life. And today—’ his fingertips traced her jawline, leaving a trail of awareness behind ‘—your happiness is what’s most important to me.’
He retreated, the contact seeming to mean nothing to him. ‘If you will ensure that I get an invitation, then I will attend the soirée. It is totally up to you.’
She watched him leave, his natural strength arousing the femininity in her and making her aware of the masculinity in him.
She would see that he got an invitation. If someone had to be cut from the guest list, it would be Tenney.
* * *
Rachael’s mother had been ecstatic that the Viscount wanted to attend their soirée. In fact, she’d been overwhelmed that Devlin might wish to be there and immediately set about double checking everything for the night. Her father had claimed it the best idea he’d heard in a long time and extended the invitation to the Viscount’s entire family.
She tried to carry on as if it were going to be the night she would reveal her wedding date. Every time her mother detected any hesitation, Rachael claimed it was because of the burns. In truth, the pain hardly ever returned, but she still had to be cautious about how she stepped and dancing sounded excruciating.
Dancing wasn’t the only part of the evening which concerned her. She hoped she could trust Tenney not to cause any disruption—after all, she would be giving him what he wanted. If he reacted publicly with anything but composure, he could hurt his future prospects. And he would sense that he must act with decorum. At least, to everyone but her.
* * *
On the night of the celebration, right as a carriage arrived at the entrance of the house, Rachael asked her mother to forgo announcing the wedding plans to the guests. A look of concern flashed across the older woman’s face, but Rachael quickly reassured her mother with a kiss to the cheek.
A few moments later, Devlin walked into the room, his mother on his arm. Payton with them. The first ones to arrive. While Payton spoke with Rachael’s father, her mother greeted the Countess like a sister and, after some quick compliments, they immediately started talking about Rachael’s injury, their children and footwear almost in the same breath.
Devlin gave her a slight shrug and a companionable look as if to say Mothers.
His dark frock coat had no special buttons. His white cravat had a simple tie this time instead of the more elaborate one he’d worn at his mother’s event. He appeared taller in the dark evening dress with a plain neckcloth and she wondered if his tailor and valet knew the effect they were creating—she was convinced they did. The simpler dress suited him best.
He wandered to her side, ostensibly to admire the fireplace carvings.
‘I’m dreading this,’ she s
aid.
‘Best to get it over.’ His attention appeared to be on the fireplace.
‘Your father didn’t arrive?’ she asked.
A flicker of his eyes in her direction. ‘No. He could not attend because Mother wanted to enjoy herself.’
She hesitated, questioning him with her expression, and accepting his acknowledging nod.
‘I would also like to have a pleasant evening, but I suspect it will be impossible—’ his gaze glanced to the entrance ‘—since that friend of yours, if he can find his backbone, may also be here.’
‘I have mixed feelings. I am happy for a chance to get him out of my life, but I cannot ruin this night for my parents. And I would like...’ She drew in a deep breath. ‘I would like to just write him a letter and tell him it is over between us. Now I understand his cowardice.’
‘You may understand. You accept that it is easier, but you are still willing to handle it face to face. That is the difference between an adult and an immature blob of human flesh that is little better than what might be scraped from the sole of a boot. Not, of course, that I specifically am talking about Tenney.’
He sounded irritated, but his smile was still in place and that heartened her. Then a troubling idea lodged itself in her mind. Was she jumping from one entanglement to another at a breakneck speed? A predicament that would end badly? She truly wasn’t in Devlin’s social world and she accepted that. She could never see herself as a leader in society and Devlin’s whole family was natural to that role.
She examined Devlin’s face. No, they were entering a friendship. Her spirits blossomed. A true, lasting friendship was so rare. That would be much safer than anything else.
How she hoped they would remain friends.
‘When he arrives, just remember to hold your head high—if he appears... You are entrancing. A goddess in human form.’ Devlin’s voice rolled over her, and settled, nestling against her.
His words embraced her first and then concern crept in. She could not fall into a deeper crevasse upon leaping out of a shallow one.
‘Next time,’ she murmured. ‘Leave off the goddess part and I might believe you.’
He laughed. ‘It’s true.’ Brushing a hand at her shoulders, he aligned his face near hers. ‘Remember, my job as a rake is not to lie, but to merely point out what others are noticing but not mentioning.’
She wrinkled her nose, and he copied her movement, adding a teasing grin. But a little tickle of excitement lodged inside her. Devlin bolstered her spirits so and, when she compared him to Tenney who had always wanted to maintain decorum at all costs, Tenney felt more like an anchor than a beloved.
Immediately afterwards, he noted more visitors arriving. Her aunt and uncle walked through the door and made their way to her mother.
‘Do you think your Tenney will be brave enough to show up after he made a complete fool of himself?’ he asked.
She heard the emphasis as he’d said Tenney, but her mind focused on the word your and her jaw tightened. She didn’t correct Devlin, but Tenney was no longer hers...if he had ever been.
No, she decided, he’d never been hers no matter how she had deluded herself.
She returned to the conversation. ‘He should. In the note I sent him, I told him we must talk.’ Frowning, she added, ‘I wrote that we must have had a misunderstanding and I wished to clear it...and that my mother expects me to announce the date for our wedding tonight.’ She pressed her lips into a line. ‘It was a short missive. A paragraph when I’ve never written less than a page in the past.’
His voice rumbled low. ‘I should have delivered it for you.’
That image formed in her mind and she was forced to laugh. ‘I might have let you.’
Now that she’d spoken with Devlin, the nervousness didn’t seem so overwhelming. She’d spent more time on her appearance than she’d ever spent on one night in her life. She feared her coiffure might tumble down if she changed direction too quickly. And she didn’t dare to bend over or her bosom might escape as well. And, of course, dancing would be a struggle with the new shoes and her having to take care not to reawaken the injury.
‘I expect to have a grand time.’ She put bravado in her words and waved her arm as if she were an empress. Then her courage plunged.
‘I’m a fraud,’ she whispered to him. ‘I saw the mirror and I didn’t even look like myself.’
‘Then there are two of you, both beautiful.’
She pondered on his response. It would have been so easy for him to fumble with an answer. Tenney would have. If Devlin had complimented the woman in the mirror, then he would have insulted the true person she was. And if he’d praised the true her, it would have been an insult to the care she’d taken on her appearance.
‘You have a positive word for every situation.’
‘Except one. Remember, a man who’ll spout untruths about your nose will lie about anything. And I repeat, you have a stunning nose, equal to the absolute best in London.’
‘Thank you,’ she said. ‘I would have left it behind out of consideration for Mr Tenney’s feelings if I could have, but I decided that would attract too much notice.’
He gave a quick clasp of her hand, and he smiled. ‘You will be fine tonight. You are in your home, surrounded by people who care for you.’
Mentally, Rachael repeated the words of the letter, then reminded herself her nose was fine. In fact, it was almost the only part of her that felt normal.
But even her eyes had appeared as though they belonged to someone else when she’d prepared for the evening. They’d been rimmed with a dark powder and appeared larger. Her lips had been stained.
She’d even borrowed a heart-shaped necklace from her mother—one much larger than she normally would have chosen—and wore it.
If men could go to battle wearing armour, she supposed she could go to a soirée wearing more jewels than usual.
She even wore several rings, including Tenney’s, and her stomach had rebelled when she’d placed the jewel back on her finger. She wanted to have it returned to him.
She remembered her hesitation when she’d first seen the gemstone. She should have listened to her instincts.
When Tenney stepped into the room, it was as if a cold blast of air blew over the spot on the fourth finger of her left hand. She made a fist and her hand instantly warmed.
CHAPTER SEVEN
Devlin watched the event, keeping a view so he could be aware of each arrival. No one had attended yet who could have been Tenney.
Payton’s hand appeared, seemingly out of nowhere. He seesawed his flat palm in front of Devlin’s face. ‘There are other people in the room besides your old flame.’
‘You dolt,’ Devlin retorted sharply.
‘If you would have said it, I would have laughed.’ Payton stood at Devlin’s side. ‘Mmm. She is rather fetching tonight. She can set me afire any time she wishes.’
‘Stay away—’ Devlin stopped. ‘Perhaps you would care to dance with her? After her beloved arrives.’
‘Of course.’ Payton smirked. ‘I could waltz with her for hours.’
‘Mind your manners. But let her know she’s endearing. Nicely.’ Devlin’s eyes narrowed even more. ‘And you will answer to my boot if you are anything but the perfect gentleman.’
Payton chuckled. ‘I see how it is.’
Devlin ignored Payton, his attention caught on the man with the over-dressed hair who had just walked through the door.
‘There he is,’ Devlin said, as the man’s eyes searched out Rachael. ‘I would wager that is the peahen she is betrothed to.’
‘Actually, I’ve heard he’s rather clever. Has plans to step up the social ladder if the ingratiatingly annoying way he once introduced himself to my father is any indication.’
‘He’s not as clever as he thinks he is.’
�
�None of us is,’ Payton said. ‘Including you. You’re still playing with fire.’
Devlin shot his cousin a glare, but couldn’t keep his attention from Rachael. She’d noticed Tenney and the recognition caused her to tense, her steps wobbling. Tenney stared at her.
Irritation simmered inside Devlin.
Tenney didn’t even acknowledge Rachael. Instead, he headed straight for the refreshment table, a glare in his eyes.
‘Ask her to dance,’ Devlin said to Payton. ‘Now. Make her laugh, even if you have to bribe her to do so.’
‘An easy task. No bribe needed,’ Payton said, just before he strode to Rachael.
Conversation flickered between them. Payton appeared wounded, made a prayer clasp and then...victory, just as the people gathered for the first set started moving.
Watching them dance, Devlin wondered if Rachael might transfer her affections to his cousin and he hoped her wiser than that.
Payton’s awareness of Rachael was merely a man’s responsiveness to an appealing woman. Much like an insect might be called to a pretty flower.
Devlin detached himself from the surroundings. As Payton charmed Rachael, he wondered if he did the same. That if, in the initial aftermath of the accident, he’d committed himself to seeing that she was safe and it had merely carried on. It was definitely not a hardship.
Anyone would like Rachael. She had a big heart and her beauty radiated from within.
Then his attention latched on to Tenney and Tenney gave him the barest acknowledgement.
Devlin wondered that Tenney didn’t quake in his boots if the man could read his mind, but then Tenney was possibly the most obtuse man on the planet. He couldn’t even appreciate what a devoted wife Rachael would make.
Rachael promenaded between them as the dancers twirled.
At the end, Payton guided her from the dancers and straight to Tenney. That was not part of the plan. Devlin gritted his teeth.
Payton flashed his cousin a smile as he walked from the two and Devlin held up a fist, his crooked little finger extended. Payton laughed, raised his eyebrows and sauntered on, knowing Devlin could do nothing to him at such an event.
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