Wild and Free

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Wild and Free Page 37

by Kristen Ashley


  “Right. Then good. ’Preciate you comin’ up to tell me this. I’ll get one of the nurses to draw my blood tomorrow,” Abel replied, and when he did, I saw Gregor was just as surprised by his non-reaction as I was.

  “Uh…” I started but didn’t get any further because Abel kept talking.

  “Or is there something else?”

  “No, Abel,” Gregor said quietly. “That’s all we have for now.”

  At that, Abel disengaged from me and moved to the door. He opened it and turned back to Gregor.

  “Then again, appreciate you tellin’ me this. Now, we all got a big day tomorrow so we all should rest up.”

  I pressed my lips together and turned my head to give big eyes to Gregor.

  He took in my big eyes and his face got slightly soft before he looked to Abel and nodded. “You’re right. We all should rest.” He looked back to me. “Good night, Lilah.”

  “Uh, ’night, Gregor.”

  He tipped his head to the side, then walked to the door. “Good night, Abel.”

  “Later,” Abel muttered.

  Gregor’s gaze came to me once more before he walked through the door.

  Abel closed it on him and turned to me. “You need the bathroom?”

  I stared.

  “Lilah?” Abel prompted.

  “You have a brother,” I blurted.

  “Yep,” he agreed, then started striding toward the bathroom.

  I watched him do this. When he disappeared in it and I saw the light come on, but he didn’t close the door, I moved that way.

  When I was in the door, I saw him bent over the sink, splashing water on his face.

  “Baby, twenty years ago, he saved your life,” I said gently.

  Abel turned off the taps and muttered, “Apparently.”

  I watched him reach for the hand towel, nab it, and use it to dry his face.

  “This is kinda huge news,” I pointed out.

  He kept his eyes to the mirror as he said, “Kinda.”

  “Okay, no,” I stated. “It’s not ‘kinda’ huge news, honey. You have a brother and he saved your life.” My voice had risen and it, or my words, finally got me his eyes.

  “Went over that, Lilah. Now a coupla times.”

  What was going on?

  “You have no reaction?” I asked.

  “What reaction do you want?” he asked back.

  I threw out a hand. “I don’t know. Something.”

  “He saved my life,” Abel declared.

  “Yes, honey.”

  “And they think he’s been lookin’ after me.”

  “Yes,” I repeated.

  Abel held my eyes and decreed, “He sucks at it.”

  My head jerked. “I—”

  Suddenly, he twisted his torso. Bunching up the hand towel, he threw it violently across the long vanity. It flew, opened, and fluttered, landing on the far edge of the other sink.

  Just as suddenly, he twisted back to me and bit out, “All my life, thought I was a monster.”

  There it was.

  I started to move into the room.

  Abel’s voice kept biting. “All my life, thought I was the only one, alone in who I was. Deviant. Abnormal. Wrong. Wondering where I came from. Wondering how I could even be.”

  “Honey,” I whispered, getting close but stopping when his long legs took him a long step back.

  “Watched people I love die. Not one. Not three. Generations of them. When I found the woman for me, didn’t know I could keep her alive.”

  “Maybe your brother doesn’t know that either,” I suggested carefully.

  “And maybe he does. At least if he’s lookin’ after me like they think, he saved my life, he knows what I am, what we both are, he knew he wasn’t alone.”

  “Perhaps you should wait to be this angry after you hear what he has to say,” I offered, keeping up with my suggestions.

  “And perhaps you know me enough to know that if I had a brother, I would not ever leave him hanging,” Abel shot back, and he was right. I knew him enough to know that for certain.

  I lifted a hand toward him and said, “I don’t know what to say to make it better.”

  “Bury my cock in your cunt. That’d work,” he clipped, and I didn’t like that, what he said or how he said it.

  Therefore, I told him, “That part of what we have is not about you being angry and spewing asshole remarks.”

  “Okay then, Lilah, how ’bout you give me a minute to wrap my head around that shit Gregor just shared without you up in my face about it,” he fired back instantly, his aim true and hurtful.

  I took a step back. “You need a minute, you only have to ask.”

  He stared at me before he inquired, “You got any siblings?”

  “You know I don’t,” I answered.

  “I didn’t either, until five minutes ago.”

  “That isn’t true. You’ve had generations of them. I know it hasn’t occurred to you because you’re too busy being pissed, but do you think your brother, in looking out for you, maybe didn’t have even that?”

  His jaw got hard.

  He didn’t think of that.

  “You can be pissed at him,” I stated. “You have a right because you’re correct. He left you hanging. He left you alone. He left you to come to the conclusion that you were a monster. And even if he doesn’t know much about who he is, at least you could have had each other. But as for me, he saved my man’s life. So I’m not going to be pissed at him. When they find him and bring him to us, I’m going to give him a big hug and thank him and maybe make him cookies. And you’re gonna have to put up with that and not go wolf on me, or, honestly, burying your cock in my cunt will only be a memory for you for at least a decade.”

  His eyebrows shot up, and when they did, they did it scarily. “You’d deny me?”

  I ignored his scary eyebrows.

  “Fuck yes, if you don’t let me hug anyone who saves your life. And make them cookies. Though, just saying, I kinda hope your brother is the only one who gets that distinction. But with the way things are rolling for us, I might be handing hugs and cookies around to entire armies.”

  “This is not the time to be a smartass, Lilah,” he growled.

  “You’re right. So, for future reference, you need time in your head and away from me, ask for it. You don’t want to talk things out, tell me. You need to be a dick, just saying, there is never a time when that’s okay to do with me.”

  “You laid that out, believe this, and I took it in. But Delilah, there is no way in fuck you couldn’t have taken it in that I didn’t wanna process that shit with you at the precise moment you wanted to process it, and you pushed it. You don’t want the dick, then maybe you should learn to read me and back off when I need you to, not makin’ me ask you to.”

  Fuck, he had a point.

  “Okay, Abel, you’re right. I read that and pushed it. I’ll try not to do it again.”

  “Brilliant. Now, do you mind I take a piss?”

  My head tipped to the side, shocked at this request because we hadn’t been together for weeks without that happening and he always did it with the door open. Not to mention, I’d grown up around men who did it wherever, whenever, no matter who was around or even watching.

  Therefore, I queried, “You need privacy for that?”

  He blew out an annoyed breath, then declared, “You’re my world, my reason for existing, but I got a brother I didn’t know I had, who saved my life, and I gotta take a piss. So no. I don’t give a shit you see that. Just right now, I wanna take a piss and be with my own thoughts. That work for you, or you want me to drag a chair in here so you can watch?”

  “Now you’re being an amusing dick,” I told him.

  “Baby, I gotta piss,” he ground out impatiently.

  I tried not to smile as I flicked out a hand and muttered, “Carry on,” before I walked out of the room, closing the door behind me.

  I went to the window and stared out at a sea that was
undulating calmly. A sea that supernatural beings, who created their offspring by tearing away their own flesh and bone, were going to use to attack tomorrow night with the intent to kill people I cared about, including me.

  Since that was not the greatest train of thought, I thought about Abel’s brother, wondering what was up with that.

  Since I would get no answers until we met him (I won’t lie: I could dig Abel being pissed, but I couldn’t wait to meet him), there was no use thinking about that.

  That was when Abel’s words rang in my head.

  You’re my world, my reason for existing.

  Now that was worth thinking about.

  I leaned forward, pressing my forehead against the cold glass and seeing from my reflection closeup that I was smiling and doing it big.

  After the day we’d had, I couldn’t believe I was doing it. But knowing I was Abel Jin’s world, his reason for existing, I couldn’t help it.

  I heard the bathroom door open and kept my forehead to the glass. I only took it from the glass when Abel wrapped his arms around me, one at my upper chest, one at my ribs, and pulled my back tight to his front.

  “For future reference,” he said softly in my ear, “don’t give a shit you see that with me, but you gotta take care of business, you close the door.”

  I stared at us in the glass—Abel holding me close, his head bent, his lips to my ear—and it was an awesome picture, but I didn’t really process it because I was stunned at his words.

  “For a biker, your preference is surprising.”

  “You wanna be open about that shit, have at it. Just stating my preference.”

  “I prefer privacy,” I shared.

  “Kinda noticed that.”

  “Why is it that men taking care of business seems completely natural to me and I feel the need for privacy?”

  “Probably because you grew up with bikers who had no problem marking their territory wherever it might be, and being around men, you valued you privacy. And I grew up with women who were like you so it’s what I know.”

  “That makes sense,” I muttered.

  He pulled me closer and shoved his face deeper into my neck before he said, “Thanks for talking about pissing and not my brother.”

  I smiled at the glass. “Anything for you, baby.”

  That was when he gave it to me.

  “I’m sorry I was a dick.”

  God, I loved it how he did that. Just put it out there. So easy. Never making me work for it.

  I drew in breath and let it out. “It was understandable. I’m sorry I didn’t back off and forced you to be a dick.”

  “You were dealing with the news too.”

  “I was, but it was your news, so I should have had a mind to how you needed to deal with it, not how I wanted you to.”

  He slid his lips up my neck, back to my ear, and whispered, “Right. That’s done. Can I bury my cock in your cunt now?”

  I melted against him but replied, “Immediately?”

  “No, I’ll get you there.”

  I knew he would.

  “Then yes.”

  I thought he’d move, either breathtakingly fast or nice and slow.

  He didn’t.

  “Abel?”

  “Tomorrow night, it’s all gonna be okay.”

  I closed my eyes.

  I opened them, whispering, “Okay, baby,” and I put a lot of effort into making it sound like I believed him.

  And I did.

  I just worried he was wrong.

  He tightened his arms around me, slid his lips back down to my neck, and I’d find it would be a while before we made it to the bed because Abel was in the mood to take his time.

  And he did, going slow, being sweet, not fucking but making love to me. Again giving me what I needed but didn’t know I’d need. A long, intense orgasm that left me sated and languid and meant, once he’d tangled himself up in me, on the eve of a day that would end with fighting, I didn’t have to search for it.

  I fell fast asleep.

  * * * * *

  “I can’t believe fuckin’ vampires have a fuckin’ non-smoking policy.”

  It was the next night and this was Jabber complaining about the state of affairs not only in the compound but also in the safe room in the bunker below the compound where we were all hunkered down, waiting out the fight that was either happening above or imminently going to happen.

  That “we” included Leah, Sonia, Jian-Li, and me. With us was Regan, a beautiful, dark-haired woman who looked like Callum’s sister but was actually his mother. Under Callum’s orders, she’d arrived at the compound several days earlier. She was sweet and nice and openly adored her family, so, obviously, I dug her big time.

  The “we” in the bunker also included a seriously ticked off Chen (who was better but not better enough that Abel would let him fight, which was not a decision Chen agreed with, but his other two brothers and mother did; hence, he was there). And lastly, an also better-but-still-not-great Jabber, who never liked being cooped up, and doing it knowing my dad was somewhere close and in a hairy situation, he liked it less.

  Moose had yet to return and this freaked me out, but I couldn’t think on that.

  I couldn’t because I was freaked out about whatever was happening above us. We’d been there hours. They’d been reporting in that all was clear but way too infrequently to my way of thinking.

  Now they were not.

  We had guards in the room, guards outside the room, guards stationed in the hall, and guards securing all the routes to the bunker. These guards were being led by Caleb, who surprisingly didn’t bitch about this assignment but, instead, took it seriously.

  That was nice and even flattering. Callum’s brothers were definitely action wolves so that said a lot.

  But I was not thinking about how flattering Caleb taking his assignment without bitching was.

  I was worried about what was happening that meant they were no longer reporting in.

  The good news: I was not reacting physically to whatever it was and I was hoping this meant Abel was not in danger.

  I didn’t get agony in my gut when Callum or Lucien were in danger so I couldn’t help Leah or Sonia with their own worries. Sonia was actually being very cool, acting calm and collected, and her being this way helped me not to totally lose it.

  But she’d had experience waiting out Callum in battle. It was Leah and I who were the newbies. Neither of us liked this much and neither of us bothered to expend the effort not to show that.

  Therefore, I wasn’t totally losing it. I was close to totally losing it.

  “It’s not like they can die from secondhand smoke,” Jabber went on.

  “I believe,” Jian-Li began, “even if we don’t share your habit, at this juncture, we can all appreciate your need, Jabber. However, voicing your objections will not change their policy at this time, seeing as they’re all rather busy with something else.”

  Jabber glared at Jian-Li.

  “I could actually use a cigarette and I’ve never smoked,” Leah muttered to me, but her eyes were on the door.

  I had, though only while acting out against my mother, but I knew having a smoke now wouldn’t help.

  Only our men walking through the door would help.

  “I’m thinking we need tequila shots,” I muttered back.

  She looked to me. “Lucien isn’t a big fan of secondhand drinking, that being feeding from me after I’ve become inebriated.” She shook her head. “Actually, that isn’t true. If I drink champagne or vodka, he quite likes that. Tequila…” She trailed off and made a face before carrying on. “When this is all over, we’re celebrating and I want him to enjoy that to its fullest. So no tequila for me, even if we did have it.”

  I was with her.

  I was also interested in what she’d said about drinking.

  So I asked, “Really? He doesn’t like it when you drink?”

  She shook her head.

  My eyes wandered to the
door as I mumbled, “I wonder how Abel feels about it.”

  “Everyone is different,” Leah noted, and I hoped she was right because Abel and I hadn’t tried drunk sex. I figured drunk sex with Abel would absolutely rock, and therefore, that was something we’d be rectifying immediately.

  Namely, when he showed, healthy and intact, in the door I was staring at.

  “Have you seen a golem?” I asked the door.

  “No,” Leah answered.

  “Abel said they’re large and hard to kill,” I said softly.

  “Lucien told me the same thing.”

  We went silent, both staring at the door. We stayed silent for a while and our silence was only broken when Jian-Li moved from the couch where she was sitting with Sonia and Regan to the couch kitty-corner to where I was sitting with Leah.

  She perched on the arm of the sofa next to me and patted my shoulder.

  “It will all be well.”

  I looked up at her. She was seemingly cool and collected too, and she had three boys up there doing whatever they were doing, only one of them immortal.

  “Yes, it will,” I agreed, lifting my hand to her leg and patting her back.

  She smiled down at me and patted my shoulder again before her eyes drifted to the door.

  Chen approached and threw himself in an armchair close to his mother and me. I winced, thinking he should take more care, seeing as he was still recovering, but the look on his face did not invite sisterly concern or advice.

  “It’d be better if we could at least hear something,” he griped.

  “We will,” Jian-Li told her son. “Soon.”

  Chen looked to his mother. “You know this how?”

  I watched as she looked to her son. “I know this because I’m a mother.”

  “Motherly clairvoyance?” he asked. “Did you just get this, or is it something you’ve had for years but never told us about?”

  I gave wide eyes to Leah because Jian-Li’s boys could be abrasive and even give lip to their mother (not that she took it, but that didn’t mean they didn’t give it occasionally), but his tone was derisive and I didn’t think Jian-Li was going to stand for that.

  She wasn’t and she didn’t waste time sharing that with her son.

  “I’ve always had it, Chen,” she said with patience, though that patience was strained. “From the moment each of you was born. That happens with mothers. However, in this case, it isn’t clairvoyance. It’s hope. And being here not knowing anything, not seeing anything, not even hearing anything, that’s what we have. It’s all we have. And we have to hold strong to it.”

 

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