For the next few minutes, we didn’t speak. We didn’t need to. We said everything with our hands and fingers. When his hands slid under my sweater and cupped my breasts, I tossed my hair back and arched into him. He drove me wild, mad, and completely insane, and I loved being unhinged in his arms.
“My Little Lottie,” Hawk began, leaning over the bed and pressing me against the mattress. “You are mine.” The possessive tone in his voice caused goose bumps rise.
My sweater flew up and over my head. Hawk’s mouth fell against the swells of my breasts, wandering lower against my rib cage and stomach until I was writhing. I raked my fingers through his hair while he pulled my leggings down.
“Say it,” he commanded. “Say you’re mine.”
He hovered just over my core. His hot breath teased me through the thin fabric separating us.
“I’m yours, Hawk,” I whispered breathlessly. “I’ve always been yours.”
“Yes,” he agreed, hooking each thumb in my panties and pulling them down. “Yes, you have been.”
He knelt on the floor, spreading my thighs with his broad shoulders. Completely at his mercy, I closed my eyes and enjoyed the electric jolt of pleasure his mouth gave my most sensitive place. My arms spread out against the duvet, and soon, my fingers gripped the fabric tightly.
Arching my back, I wriggled my hips against his devious mouth and struggled to keep quiet. Silently daring myself to look down, I saw Hawk’s eyes watching me with dark promises. With our eyes locked, he slid one finger in first, then a second. My mouth fell open in a silent scream.
His talented fingers stroked directly over the secret spot inside me that drove me over the edge in tandem with his tongue. I came, thrashing on the bed, mewling softly, and allowed myself to sink into the mind-blowing sparks of pleasure.
Hawk continued to tease and draw as many aftershocks as he could before pulling my underwear and leggings back up. He offered me a hand, gently pulling me back into a sitting position. With a cocky grin, he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.
“How was that?”
Blushing, I tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. “Amazing.”
He hooked a finger under my chin, raising my gaze to meet his. And he was hungry, oh so hungry it made me clench my thighs together and immediately want more. I knew what he wanted, and only I could give it to him. That knowledge made me feel powerful, in control, and sexy.
I stood, pushing against Hawk’s chest to give me space in front of him before my fingers went to the buckle of his jeans. A low moan resonated in his chest while I quickly freed him from the confines of his pants. Already rock hard, his cock strained against the cotton fabric of his navy boxer briefs.
“Sit.”
He did as I said, his jeans down around his ankles. The desk chair squeaked as he did so. I lowered myself to my knees in front of him. A mixture of feral lust and adoration reflected in his gaze. My heart pounding, I tried not to focus on what I looked like or his piercing eyes. Instead, I carefully fished his erection out, then stroked up and down slowly.
Hawk’s hands gripped the armrests of the chair so hard his knuckles turned white. A shiver of excitement raced through me. This man who had so much more experience than me seemed unhinged and out of control whenever I touched him.
Tentatively, I licked my tongue over his crown, and he sucked in a breath through clenched teeth. I continued with slow, torturous licks and wet kisses all over until one hand gently fisted in my hair, guiding me.
“Please, Charlotte,” he panted. “I need you.”
He needs me.
The thought warmed my chest, and all I wanted to do was please him.
I took him into my mouth, making sure the motion was slow and deliberate. The chair rocked, and I glanced up. Hawk’s head had fallen back, his eyes closed, his mouth open in his own silent cries. Over and over, my head bobbed, and my cheeks hollowed. All I wanted was to make him feel as amazing as he’d made me feel. To convey my own true emotions in the basest of ways.
When his body folded in half, both hands carded in my long tresses, I went faster, deeper.
“Fuck, Charlotte,” he growled under his breath. “You are too good at this, baby.”
I hummed with him in the back of my throat, hoping the vibrations added a new sensation. The way his cock pulsed against my tongue and his quiet curses strung out in a tangled mess gave me my answer. Not caring if I was messy, I continued, listening to his breathing grow ragged. His hips began to swing upward. I stilled while he used my mouth the way he wanted to. My fingers rose to play against his washboard abs and the pronounced V-muscles along his hips.
“Charlotte …”
He didn’t need to say anything else. I continued to pleasure him. He didn’t give me another warning. He didn’t have to. Warmth coated my tongue, and I swallowed him down. I didn’t stop until he slumped back in the chair, boneless.
I slowly came off my knees, standing before him feeling like a vixen. With a smirk of my own, I wiped the back of my hand against my lips while he watched. He tucked himself back into his underwear, then pulled his jeans up, leaving them undone.
“Come here,” he said softly, offering his hand out to me.
Taking his hand, I stepped into him, sitting on his lap sideways as he cradled me against his chest. I inhaled his fresh scent, trying desperately to imprint it on my mind. He’d be gone soon, and I’d miss him so damn much.
“I love you, Hawk.” My voice trembled as I nuzzled my nose under his chin. “I’ve always loved you.”
His strong arms gripped me tighter to him, gently squeezing me. “I know, Lottie. Believe me, I know. And I loved you in so many ways. But this is by far my favorite.”
We didn’t mention him leaving again. He just held me, whispering promises of what was to come until I fell asleep to the steady beating of his heart.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Hawk
Three weeks later …
The ocean waves crashed against the shore, sending its salty spray into the air. I inhaled deeply, closing my eyes to the familiar scent. The smell of the ocean used to comfort me, letting me know when I was almost home. But now, it only reminded me of how far away she was from me. How her smell, her soft body, and her gentle voice held my heart in a way no place could.
For the first time in my life since moving to Florida, I didn’t want to leave. I wanted to stay and bury myself in Charlotte until we were one. But duty called. So I left. She’d driven me to the airport, and I kissed her like a man going to war.
With a heavy sigh, I shoved my hands into the pockets of my shorts. The view from my beachfront balcony didn’t compare to the sight of a gorgeous blonde kissed by the sun. A woman adorned in so many feathers you’d think should could fly. My Lottie. The woman I’d make mine for the rest of our lives.
There’d been times in the past when I thought I’d felt love for someone else, but now I knew the truth. Those feelings hadn’t even come close to what I feel for Charlotte. With her, it was an incessant need, a throat-parching desire to be near her. Just to bask in her calm presence would be enough for me. To sit in the familiar silence that was uniquely us and see her smile.
When did I fall in love?
She’d always had me wrapped around her finger since the moment our eyes met. But I hadn’t lied when I’d told her I loved her in so many ways. I’d loved her as a brother, a friend, and now, a lover. My chest rose and fell faster at the thought of our evolution. From a broken, scarred little girl, she’d risen like a phoenix and became a woman of silent strength. And my God, I loved her.
I loved her. I loved her. I fucking loved her.
“You doing okay, Hawk?” Jax’s voice broke the silence behind me. He stepped through the open sliding glass door, handing me a beer.
Glancing out of the corner of my eye, I took the cool bottle and forced a smile. “Yeah, of course.”
Jax arched an eyebrow, his messy dirty blond hair falling into his face. He
took a swig, then rested a heavy hand on my shoulder. I braced myself for whatever it was that he had to say.
“Dude, you haven’t been okay since you got back.” He regarded me carefully. “It’s that girl, isn’t it? Charlotte.”
Exhaling, I took a drink of the cool liquid before nodding.
“Did you and her, you know?” he pressed.
I shook my head. “No, not sex, but we did other stuff.”
Both of his brows shot up. “Right on.”
Chuckling, I raked a hand through my hair, unsure of how to discuss Lottie without sounding like a complete love-struck idiot. But Jax had gone through a similar thing with his now wife, Elise.
“I’ve never felt this way about anyone else before in my life, Jax,” I admitted. “A part of me says that it’s wrong because I’ve known her since she was a kid, but now …” my voice trailed off as the sunset on the horizon captured my attention.
In my daydream, I saw Charlotte walking along the beach in a long white skirt. A matching bikini top and her waves of hair cascading down her shoulders would glint in the changing sun. She’d walk barefoot through the surf. I’d meet her, and we’d tumble to the sand.
“She’s an adult now.” Jax shrugged, leaning his bronzed arms against the railing. “Age doesn’t count once it’s legal.”
I snorted. “Yeah, well, you didn’t know Elise when she was fourteen and you were twenty-one.”
“This is true.” Jax smirked. “Look at you, robbin’ the cradle.”
Rolling my eyes, I took another swig of beer. “She’s just … different from anyone I’ve ever met. Both of our mothers walked out on us.” I remembered the look of sheer terror on Charlotte’s face back at the restaurant when she heard her mother’s voice. “But she’s so fucking strong, Jax. Even as a kid, I found myself leaning on her.”
“One of those wiser than her years kinds?” He nodded. “With what you’ve told me about her past, I can see that. Trauma forces kids to grow up.”
My mind raced back to the first time I spoke to her. For some reason, out of everyone in my grandmother’s house, she chose me. Even though she dared me with her untrusting eyes filled with tears the first day she came to our house, she picked me.
“I love her.”
The admission hung between us. Jax took his turn squinting out over the water before giving me a knowing smile.
“Good. It’s about time you settled down with someone.” He slapped my back lightly. “She’s coming down for spring break, right? I can’t wait to meet her.”
My best friend disappeared back into my house while I continued to stare at the ocean. The sky had exploded into a burst of purples, pinks, and oranges. I wanted to share this view with Charlotte every night for the rest of our lives.
March was over a month away, and my bed grew colder each night.
I needed to be patient.
But how could I when my entire world slept over a thousand miles away from me?
Chapter Thirty
Charlotte
Spring Break – March
The moment the plane touched down in Florida and began its slow taxi to the gate, my heart galloped away in my chest. My phone vibrated as soon as I turned it on. A new text message from Hawk made my stomach flip.
Hawk: I watched you land. Can’t wait to have you in my arms.
Heat flooded my cheeks as excitement crept into every fiber of my body. Over the next week, I would be alone with Hawk. We’d only have each other. I’d finally get to see where he lives, and we’d finally be together the way I’d been dreaming of for months.
I began to gather my travel bag as well as my purse. Hawk insisted that I fly first class since it was my first time, and he even paid for my ticket. The flight attendant opened the compartment and brought down my carry-on for me.
“Thank you.” I smiled brightly. Every time I moved, the variety of feathers tinkled against my wrist.
“Enjoy Florida,” she replied brightly as she moved to assist the other passengers.
The three-and-a-half-hour flight from Syracuse International had gone by quickly. I’d busied myself with some leftover work from my student teaching curriculum for when I returned. All the while, I’d listened to some of my favorite songs along with a few that Hawk mentioned he liked as well.
Departing the plane, I walked briskly, eyes darting all around the moment I exited into the main area of the airport. So many people milled around, dashing past each other trying to catch different flights. Parents with their children tried their best to keep the little ones occupied. Older couples spoke softly to one another with excitement on their faces. Young professionals and college age kids alike sat on built-in technology labs for work or school.
I continued to walk, following the signs for the exit. Every step I took sent another rush of anticipation surging through my veins. It felt like I’d waited forever, my entire life, for this one week.
After turning the final corner, I saw him.
He stood casually, leaning against the wall, checking his watch. His light washed jeans hugged his muscular thighs, and the navy blue V-neck tee he wore showed off his broad shoulders. His tousled hair fell over into his eyes, and the stubble along his jaw cast his features in dark shadows.
When he glanced up, our gazes locked.
I watched his serious expression transform into pure joy. The wide, boyish smile made him look like the young man I’d met all those years ago. He pushed himself away from the wall and practically jogged to meet me.
He didn’t wait or ask for permission. He didn’t need to. The second we were inches apart, he cupped my cheeks, drawing me into the kiss I’d yearned for since he left me. We didn’t care if people stared. I dropped my bags and wrapped my arms around his neck. Our bodies molded together as his hands slid from my face, over my shoulders, and down my back.
“I missed you so much, Lottie,” he breathed, rubbing our noses together.
My eyes closed, relishing in his ocean-spray scent and warm embrace. “I missed you too, Hawk. So much.”
“Well, you’re here now.” He leaned down, grabbing my travel pack and the handle to my carry-on. “Let’s get out of here and go home.”
Home.
My heart leaped at the word.
Adjusting my purse over my shoulder, I followed Hawk out of the busy airport and into the brilliant Florida sunshine. We walked into the parking garage, stopping by an impressive looking midnight-blue Corvette.
“This is my pride and joy.” Hawk winked at me while he popped the trunk. Once he’d loaded my bags, he came around to my side. Before opening my door for me, he pinned me to the sports car. Both hands came to rest on either side of my head. His blue-gray gaze swirled with dark promises. “I’ve waited years for this moment, Charlotte. I just want you to know I don’t consider this temporary. Do you understand?”
His lips hovered just inches from mine. I could taste the spearmint gum on his breath. My body ached to be ravaged by this man.
“I understand.” I nodded, completely aware of the weight his words carried. “I feel the same way.”
“Good.” He placed a fevered kiss on my lips, stealing my breath away. A group of young men walking by catcalled us. Immediately, my face grew heated, and Hawk stepped away, rubbing his mouth with a mischievous look.
Once settled on the leather interior and on the road, our conversation ebbed and flowed until we fell into a comfortable silence. His hand rested on my thigh while my hand covered his. Such a simple touch yet it meant everything to me. It made me tingle, snap with electricity, and want him more than I ever thought possible.
My body’s needs, however, lost to the inquisitive nature of my brain. The farther away we drove from the city of Orlando, the more Florida’s natural beauty opened up for me. It took us a couple of hours to get to the coast with having to travel through small towns and a few cities at rush hour.
When Hawk pulled down a long drive through an open gate, I knew we were close. Palm tre
es lined the drive, and a large Spanish-style villa stood before us. The pale cream siding mixed with the dark red roof stood out against the baby blue sky.
“This place is amazing.” I swallowed hard, taking in as much of the structure as I could.
He chuckled. “Wait until you see the inside.”
Hawk helped me out of the car before gathering my bags again. We walked hand in hand to the front door. He punched in a code. The sound of the device unlocking clicked, and he swung the stained-glass masterpiece open wide.
“Go ahead,” he urged.
I stepped over the threshold and into the foyer of the house. Tones of cream, copper, and sage green played with each other in contrast. The floor plan was open, and I could see the pristine view of the beach offered by the windows straight ahead.
Immediately, my feet took me through the house until I stared at the rolling waves in awe. I could smell the ocean when I got out of the car, but now I would be able to feel it.
“Quite the view, huh?” Hawk wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me flush against his chest. I leaned back, reveling in his calm. “I have a surprise for you.”
Turning in his arms, I arched a brow. “A surprise for me?”
His gaze softened on mine. “Yes, Lottie. For you.” He offered his hand, and I took it without hesitation.
We walked through an open living area with a large fireplace that heated both the inside and the patio outside. A large state-of-the-art kitchen with bar seating appeared to my left. Hawk led me to a small room off the living area. I gasped.
A beautiful white grand piano stood in the center of the room. Three of the four sides to the room were glass with a complete view of the beach. Tears gathered in my eyes.
“You didn’t have to do this, Hawk.” I reached out cautiously and touched one of the sparkling keys.
“Yes, I did.” He kissed my neck while I studied the instrument. “I want you to feel at home here. And I love hearing you play.”
Blinking back tears, I caressed his face, loving the way his scruff felt beneath my fingertips. “I love you, Hawk McLean.”
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