With a last look at me, her brows drawn tightly together, she walked away with her sword at her side. Even accepting that I wasn’t as evil as she’d expected, she still felt stunned and afraid about seeing me in this form. I really couldn’t blame her for that. I’d been stunned and afraid, too, in the beginning.
She wouldn’t tell anyone. But I had no idea what kind of impact this revelation would truly have on our friendship.
Time would tell. And I guessed fate might also have a little part to play in how well a demon and a demon slayer’s friendship turned out.
I studied Rhys, who’d watched my exchange with Melinda in silence. “What will happen to Clara?”
He grimaced. “I opened a gateway to the faery dungeon. She’ll be kept locked up until I decide her fate.” He held up his hand when I was about to say something, although I wasn’t sure what. “It’s faery business. Don’t worry about it.”
I grimaced at what the penalty for what she’d done might be. I hated her guts and thought she was a complete idiot in every way, but that didn’t mean I wanted blood vengeance here. “Don’t kill her.”
He frowned. “Faeries don’t kill.”
“Except for Clara. Who tried to kill me. And you, who threatened me in your forest when we first met.”
“Perhaps I should clarify...faeries don’t kill other faeries.”
“Ah. Different.”
“I’ll walk you home. Come on.”
I wasn’t going to push him to give me the book, even though I couldn’t stop glancing at it under his arm. Instead, we walked to my house together. Once there, I stood on the stairs leading to my front door, unsure of what to say.
After everything that had happened tonight, some of it I was still processing, every bone in my body was tired and just wanted to go to bed. I’d put my trust in my father to help Michael.
I’d put my trust in Melinda to not hate me for what I was. And I’d put my trust in Rhys to let me have the book without demanding it from him.
“Thank you for coming back,” I said. “The words defeated, pathetic, and bloody would describe me very well a half hour ago.”
“Melinda had it under control. She wouldn’t have let Clara finish you off.” I pressed my hand against my forehead. “That silver messed with my head.”
“Everybody has their Kryptonite. Demons, and half-demons, don’t like to be stabbed with silver.”
“Imagine that.” I shuddered, grateful that the pain was a distant memory now. “When you left, you missed some of the excitement. Chris Sanders was in the park too and he shifted into dragon form.”
He took this in stride without looking overly surprised. “Really? Is he okay?”
“Never better, actually. He went for a test flight.” I glanced up. The snow had stopped and the clouds parted to show a clear sky, full moon, and a million stars in the ebony blanket above us.
“Dragons do enjoy flying.” He suddenly looked very serious. “So I got your book. That’s where I went. Well, not immediately. I planned to storm off and never speak to you again, but then I got your text and decided to be mature instead. So I got it.” He handed out toward me. I eyed it warily before my gaze snapped back to his.
“No strings attached,” he added.
“No?”
“This is me trying to be nice,” he said, although it seemed like an effort to get the words out.
“I know you want to help your Shadow boyfriend, or whatever he is to you. I don’t know if this will do the trick, but you’re welcome to borrow it. I do want it back as soon as possible, though.
This is just a loan. It’s one of a kind. Or so my advisors continually and fretfully reminded me of before I left with it.”
My hands shook a little as I took it from him. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.” He shoved his gloved hands into the pockets of his wool coat. “What do you think your father is going to do with Michael?”
My chest felt tight at the mention of it. “I don’t know. He promised he’d help him. He says that he cares about Michael and would protect him, so I hope he meant it. Queen Sephina wants Michael sent to her if she learns there’s a problem...I know she’ll have him put to death. That’s how she deals with problems—” My voice cut off and I looked at Rhys, alarmed at realizing what I’d just said.
He held my gaze. “Your secret’s safe with me. I owe Michael for killing the Shadow who murdered my parents. I won’t breathe a word.”
That was a relief and one less thing to worry about. And one more person I had to put my trust in.
But I still remembered the angry looks on both Michael’s and my father’s faces when I left the castle. I’m sure that Michael understood why I had to do what I did, but it didn’t make this any easier.
Rhys studied me. “You really care about the Shadow, don’t you?” My throat felt thick, so I simply nodded.
“I don’t envy your father what he has to deal with. It’s not easy being king and being the decision maker. He was young when he was forced to take over the throne, only a couple years older than me. And I know his position is even more strict since he can’t leave his castle.” I nodded. “It’s rough. And I know it’s lonely for him. But he’s accepted his duty.”
“Right.” He scrubbed his gloved hand through his short hair. His expression was etched with worry.
I wasn’t sure what to make of his serious mood. “What’s wrong, Rhys?”
“What’s wrong?” he repeated. “Everything. Tonight only proved to me something I’ve known for a while now. I’m fooling myself by staying here. I should be in the Faery Realm right now acting like king. I am king, but I’m behaving like a spoiled child who wants to play with his toys no matter what anyone else says. I’ve been stubborn about it, going against everyone’s wishes to stay here where it’s easy and homework is the biggest challenge of the day.”
“You deserve to experience life as a regular teenager. What happened to your parents was horrible, and you had to become king so young. It’s not fair.”
“Life isn’t fair, Nikki.” He crossed his arms. “I need to go back and I need to stay there this time. There isn’t really any reason for me to stay here any longer. I just thought...” He trailed off.
“It doesn’t really matter. According to Clara, my people believe me to be more fool than king.
Maybe they’re right.”
I bristled with anger on Rhys’s behalf. “Who cares what Clara says?”
“It’s been an interesting experiment, Nikki, but it’s come to an end. I’m going home.” I stared at him with surprise.
No. This couldn’t happen. He couldn’t leave me. Not like this. I tried to pretend I was a normal teenager, but I wasn’t. It was so hard to keep up that façade, in front of my friends, in front of my mom. Only with Rhys could I totally be myself here. If he left, what was I supposed to do? Who was I supposed to talk to about all of this craziness and uncertainty?
Sure, Melinda and Chris both knew now and were dealing with their own issues. But with Rhys—it was different. I might not get along with him all the time, but he understood me. He knew what I was going through because he was going through it, too.
“Goodnight, Nikki. I’ll send someone to retrieve the book in a couple of days. I’m sure we’ll see each other again someday.” He turned away from me.
“Wait, Rhys—” I grabbed his arm.
He glanced at me, his brows drawn together. “What?”
I put one hand behind his neck, pulled him to me, and...kissed him.
He gasped against my lips, as if this was the last thing he expected from me tonight. Couldn’t say I blamed him after my temper tantrum in the park. But then he finally kissed me back, holding my face between his hands.
My heart thudded like crazy as the kiss deepened and the chill from the cold winter night all around us seemed to disappear.
It was a lot like the kiss under the mistletoe—but different, too. Better. This kiss completely took my breath aw
ay.
When we parted he stared at me, the gold flecks in his eyes swirling wildly. “You kissed me.” My cheeks burned and I had trouble finding my voice. “It was our deal for the book. It’s only fair.”
He blinked and took a step back from me, confusion etched into his handsome features. “So that’s all it was? Just payment for me bringing you the book?” Part of me wanted to say yes, that was all it was. I wanted to tell him that I wasn’t in love with him, and that the prophecy about us didn’t mean anything more to me than just words. That Michael was the only one my heart belonged to, despite our troubles and uncertain future. And that I’d kissed Rhys just so he’d consider sticking around a bit longer—because I needed him in my life.
That was all the kiss was supposed to be.
But I couldn’t lie to myself. Not completely.
I had felt something during that kiss. Something big, something scary, and something endlessly confusing.
My heart already belonged to Michael—I knew it did. And a girl’s heart couldn’t belong to more than one boy at the same time.
Could it?
Instead of admitting any of this out loud, I shrugged a shoulder and studied the step I currently stood on. My face heated up even more and my heart thundered in my chest. “I don’t want you to go back home full-time. Not yet. I want you to stay in school for a while longer.” He didn’t speak for a moment. “For how long?”
“I don’t know.”
“You don’t want me to leave?”
I shook my head.
“Say it,” he whispered.
I looked up at him and met his gaze. “I don’t want you to leave.”
“You want me to go against what my kingdom wants, for me to keep being a selfish child who wants to play with my toys?”
I grimaced. “Don’t put it like that. Just stay until the end of January. That’s less than a month.
Then you can be like my father and devote yourself to duty and being the best king and making sure all unicorns in the Faery Realm are treated well and shampooed daily.” The amusement finally returned to his expression. He raised an eyebrow. “Well, there’s more to it than just that.”
“I’m sure there is.”
Rhys held my gaze for a while longer, not speaking, his brows drawn together as if he was trying to figure me out.
Finally, he nodded. “I’ll give it some very serious thought.” I cleared my throat. Being this close to Rhys and asking him to stay had made me feel very nervous and awkward. “Or whatever. I mean, it’s not like I really care one way or the other.” That made him grin. “Good. I wouldn’t want you to fall madly in love with me. That would make things very complicated when it comes to your beloved Shadow, wouldn’t it? Who’d win the battle for your heart then? The servant or the king?” Before I could give him a snarky retort, he kissed me again and I did absolutely nothing to stop him. There was no mistletoe to blame for it this time.
“Happy reading, Princess Nikki,” he said with a last glance at the book in my arms. He headed down my driveway and walked away along the sidewalk.
I pressed my fingertips to my lips. He really was an arrogant, elitist jerk. And I’d just practically begged him to stay in the human world for another month because I couldn’t bear the thought of saying good-bye to him.
Holding the book tightly to my chest, I turned toward the door and immediately froze.
It was open.
And my mother stood there staring at me.
Chapter 19
My mouth went completely dry. “How long have you been standing there?” Her eyes were wide. “A while. I didn’t want to interrupt you and Rhys, but, Nikki...I don’t understand...”
Oh God. She’d heard. I rewound what we’d just spoken about.
Faeries. Kings. Unicorns. Princesses.
My father.
Her gaze moved to my shoulder and the rip in my sweater from the sword. She came forward and turned me around to see the rips in the back from my wings. “Nikki, what on earth is going on here?”
“I...I...” I couldn’t find my voice. It had packed up and left town.
She moved back to the open door and gripped the edge of it as if she needed something to hang on to. “You were talking about your father. And you said it so...matter of fact, like it’s no big deal. Have you been in contact with him?”
I wanted to lie. It was my knee-jerk reaction to finding myself in deep trouble. But this time I couldn’t force the deception out. I just stared at her as she stared back at me.
She inhaled sharply. “Why aren’t you saying anything? The things you and Rhys were talking about...I thought you were just playing a game. One of those role playing games. But you were serious, weren’t you? And it has something to do with Desmond. Talk to me, Nikki! Have you seen him?”
My throat hurt, so all I could manage was a jerky nod.
Her hand went to her mouth, as if she was horrified at the idea of it. “How do you even know it’s really him and not some—some predator who is trying to hurt you?”
“He’s not a predator,” I said immediately. What a horrible thought, but of course that was where her mind would go. She wanted to protect me. But she didn’t know the truth. None of it.
“What does he look like?” she demanded, anger and panic fighting in her gaze.
“He’s tall, handsome, and he has dark blond hair,” I said. “And he looks like me. Our eyes are almost exactly the same. But you already know that, right? Every time you look at me you have to see him, too.”
She flinched. It was the right answer. “It still might not be him.”
“You met in college—you hated him. I always thought it was love at first sight between you, but it wasn’t. You thought he was a jerk. You guys got in trouble together and you saved his life when somebody attacked you. Then you fell for each other.” Her face had paled. More evidence that what Dread had told me about my parents’ history wasn’t just lies. “This is insane. Completely insane.” The wash of emotion I felt right then—fear, panic, shock—would once have been more than enough to make me involuntarily shift to my Darkling form. But luckily I’d been doing a little bit of practicing. I was able to stop my horns from popping out. That might have given my mother a complete heart attack.
“Mom,” I managed after several uncomfortable and tense moments went by. “I know what Rhys and me were talking about sounded kind of crazy.”
“Kind of?” Her expression had shifted from stunned disbelief to something more filled with worry and concern. “Nikki, please tell me everything.” I swallowed hard. “Do you trust me, Mom?”
I knew this was a dangerous question. There had been many instances when I’d lied to her face, deceived her, or just withheld the truth to stay out of trouble or keep information from her. I knew that lately I hadn’t exactly earned her trust one hundred percent.
She frowned so hard that her forehead formed these little elevens between her eyebrows, wrinkles that I knew she hated so much she’d considered Botox to get rid of them. “Yes, honey, I trust you.”
I looked into her eyes. “I want to tell you everything. But I...I can’t. Not right now. Will you give me a little time to figure everything out first?” She didn’t speak for so long that I wondered if she ever would again. She backed up until she was fully in the house. I followed and shut the door behind me. Just before it closed completely I saw a suspiciously dragon-shaped silhouette do a loop-de-loop over the light of the moon.
Chris was still testing his new wings.
My mother’s hand trembled as she brushed her dark hair back from her face, her expression haunted. “I need to know more. I can’t just leave it like this right now. Where is he? What does he want? Why did he contact you and—and not contact me?” A tear slid down her cheek.
“Where has he been all of these years? Is he okay?”
The pain in her voice was enough to make me want to start crying too. I knew that she still cared about him. The anger had left quickly, leaving only
this raw pain behind. And she wanted to know if he was okay. That wasn’t something she’d ask if she hated his guts, or didn’t care at all about him.
I knew she still loved him.
She’d been dreaming about him. Somehow, some way, they were still connected.
“Tomorrow,” I whispered, grabbing hold of her shaking hands with the one not clutching the book. “I’ll tell you more tomorrow. I swear I will.”
Before she could say anything else, ask more questions, or demand more truths, I turned from her and ran up the stairs to my bedroom. I locked the door behind me.
I’d wanted to tell her about my father for a long time, but had stopped myself because he demanded that I not say a word. Who knew she was such a shameless eavesdropper? But I couldn’t go back now. She knew I’d seen my father, that we’d been in contact. However, she didn’t know he was a demon king who lived in another world.
That was going to be very hard to explain.
I sat rigidly on the edge of my bed, trying to will myself to calm down. It wasn’t easy.
I held the book Rhys gave me tightly in my sweaty hands. It took me a couple more minutes before I opened the cover and forced myself to concentrate on what was written inside.
It was handwritten, which made sense if this was considered a one of a kind book. Page after page was filled with writing. Luckily for me, I was able to read it, it wasn’t in the strange language that I’d seen my father piece through in his work.
The pages talked about Shadows and their relation to their amulets, how it held their life force. That forcibly removing it would cause a Shadow to lose their solid form and slowly wither away and die. That the amulet could also be channeled with power to be used as a weapon, although very few Shadows knew of this. How the amulet also allowed a powerful demon who could access magic from the dark worlds to bond a Shadow servant to a demon master or mistress.
There was information about the Shadowlands once belonging to Shadows—of course. That was how it got its name. It surprised me that the conquering demons hadn’t renamed it. Then I found something interesting after reading information I already knew.
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