by Lauren Wood
“Isabella,” I answered. “What’s up?”
“I thought your newly waxed body could use a little tanning,” she replied. “I’ll send you an address.”
“No way. I don’t want one of those fake orangey spray tans.”
“I mean the real thing,” she argued. “Come lounge by the pool with me. I went on a date last night through the app. I can tell you all about it.”
“Oh, well in that case…okay. Send me the info and I’ll be there in an hour.”
I hung up and waited for the ding. After running home for the proper attire, and to sadly wash Jack’s scent off of me, I headed over to the country club where Isabella was waiting.
I was starting to feel more confident and less intimidated by the comparison between us. Her almost painful flawless perfection didn’t get to me anymore. I approached her chair and slipped out of my cover, showing off my bikini.
She slid her sunglasses down to her nose to look me over. “Looking good, Jada.”
“Thanks,” I shrugged. “I’ve been working out.” She didn’t need to know my “work outs” consisted entirely of having sex all night long with her brother.
“So, tell me about this date of yours,” I said, pulling out my pen and paper for notes.
“I will.” She nodded, sipping her cocktail. “But first…I need the scoop on something you might know about.”
“Something I’d know about?”
“Jack mentioned something to me.”
I shifted in the chair. He wouldn’t have told her about us, would he? He was the one who insisted we didn’t breathe a word of our affair to anyone.
“Oh? What’s that?” I continued acting breezy and oblivious.
“I hear that Lucas extended him a full-time offer. A good one too. If he takes it, he’d stay here in the city for at least the next five years or so.”
My heart leaped just thinking of the possibilities. “I’m afraid I don’t know anything about that. Lucas mentioned promotions, but…I didn’t know he offered anything to Jack.”
“Hmm,” Isabella thought it over for a moment. “But you see Jack sometimes, right?”
“Around the office,” I answered dismissively.
“Has he mentioned it to you? Or said anything about moving back here permanently?”
“No, he really hasn’t,” I admitted honestly. I was just in the dark as she was. More so, actually.
“I won’t beat around the bush.” She uncrossed her legs, crossing them again in the opposite direction. “I’d love it if he’d take the job. To be honest, it’s been lonely for me since our mother passed away. Jack is the only family I have left. It’d be nice having him around all the time.”
No kidding, I thought. “I’d love it if he’d take it too.” I felt Isabella’s eyes shoot over to me. “I mean, he’s a great worker. He has genius ideas for the company. It’d be great to have him around to implement some of them.”
Isabella seemed content with my answer. Surely she didn’t think her brother would ever actually be into me…much less that he’d make me one of his regular lovers.
Knowing there was a possibility of him sticking around town, working at Heartstring no less, made all of my naive hopes about a future with him explode to a whole new level that was harder to push down and ignore or talk myself out of.
But what would it really mean if he stayed? Accepting things as sex and nothing more was easier right then because we were still having sex all the time. When he stopped coming around, and I was suffering withdrawals from him and everything he did to me, would it hurt to know he was getting all of that somewhere else? Seeing him around the office every day and never having more of him?
“Where is Jack right now anyway?” I ventured to ask her. “He’s been taking a bunch of days off, and it seems like he’s going out of town. But he never says where.”
“I thought you two didn’t talk much.”
“I see him around the office, like I said. And I hear Lucas mentioning things.”
She was quiet for a moment, then scoffed with a smirk. “Knowing him, he’s probably chasing some model around in his spare time. Or a few of them, for that matter. I told you he’s a womanizer. It’s not above him to hop on a jet across the country just to spend one night with a woman he wants, only to fly back again the next morning and never talk to her again.”
Her words cut into my heart like a knife. I knew all of this about him, even though he never mentioned any of it. But we had barely slept the night before. I made him cum more times than he knew he could, and he did the same to me in return. Surely he was too spent to hop on a plane and go see someone else for sex.
“What, is he like some kind of sex addict or something?” I blurted. “Sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. He’s your brother. I’m sure you don’t want to discuss his sex life.”
“It doesn’t bother me,” she shrugged. “But no, I don’t think he’s an addict. He just likes the chase and the challenge of it all. When he gets what he wants, he loses interest.”
The waiter came by and asked if I wanted anything. Perfect timing. I was finding it harder to mask my true feelings.
“I’ll have what she’s having,” I pointed to Isabella.
What she was having was a Long Island iced tea, which was stronger than I anticipated. The quick buzz it brought on only made the sinking feeling in my gut worse. I didn’t know what to believe about Jack anymore, especially when it came to his feelings for me.
“Be careful, Jada,” Isabella said all of a sudden. “Jack is charming, but he’s a heartbreaker.”
I feigned a shocked, innocent look. “Huh? Oh it’s none of my business. He can break all the hearts he wants. It has nothing to do with me.”
Her skeptical eyes kept burning into me. She wasn’t buying it anymore, and I was doing a horrible job of convincing her. She could see the anxiety written all over my face.
“Office romances happen,” she stated.
“Not for me they don’t,” I defended. “You forget I work with my two older brothers and my big sister.”
“Oh, so if Jack asked me about you…I should say there’s not a chance in hell?”
I sat up so fast I nearly spilled my drink. “Has he asked about me?”
She hesitated to answer. “No,” she replied finally. “But if he did…What should I say?”
My heart was pounding. I started sipping my drink faster, forgetting how dangerous it was. What kind of mind games was Isabella playing with me? How much had he told her, if anything? Maybe this was all just some trick for her to get me to confess something about us.
“If he asks,” I said after a while. “Tell him he should talk to me himself.”
“Noted,” she chirped. “I was just curious.”
She was keeping something from me, and it made me uneasy. Maybe physically I felt less intimidated around her, thanks to the confidence boost from Jack and my new look. But mentally I still got the impression that her ability to manipulate and play people against each other extended far past anything I was capable of. I was too clumsy and ignorant when it came to predicting people’s actions or hiding my own feelings. This conversation with her was just further proof of that. She was obviously playing some kind of game, and I was just struggling to keep up.
“Do you think your brother will ever change his ways?” I asked her. “I mean, if he took the job here. Do you see a sister-in-law in your future?”
It was too obvious, but I had to know. I might as well have asked if she wanted me to be her new sister-in-law.
“It’s doubtful,” she said, so full of confidence. “He craves freedom and hates being tied down. That’s why I don’t think he’ll take the job. But just the same, if he mentions it…Will you encourage him?”
“If I get the chance,” I told her. But deep down, I was starting to think it might not be so good for me if he did stick around.
15
Jack
I was flying back in from another consulting gi
g in California. I loved the fresh air, and how you could get a little bit of everything in that state. There were beaches, mountains, forests, the big city. There was something in every corner, depending on what you were in the mood for.
It would be so easy, I thought, to keep flying around to all of these new and interesting places, exploring everything they had to offer. I had spent my whole adult life doing that and hadn’t gotten bored yet.
So…why was it all losing its appeal so suddenly?
My stomach was uneasy from all the lying and stress. I half-hoped Lucas would withdraw his offer, then the decision would be made for me. Both decisions would be made for me. I would leave, and I would eventually get over Jada. That was the right thing to do, maybe. It was definitely the safe thing to do.
I had never been one to turn down a challenge, but matters of the heart were different. One wrong move and you could be changed forever. The wrong woman could break you down to the point where you’d never get put back together the same way again.
I sank back in my seat on the plane, dragging my hands down my face. I couldn’t think straight anymore, and I was no closer to knowing what I wanted or what I should do.
I always thought I was an honorable man, but all this lying to Jada and my friends was destroying that notion. The sick feeling inside grew as the plane landed. I had always put my career first, and that wasn’t about to change. I had to put this thing with Jada aside before her brothers grew any more angry or suspicious. Maybe then I could finally think straight enough to make up my mind about the job.
As soon as the plane landed, I hopped into the car waiting for me and told the driver to take me to Jada’s side of town. Once I called to confirm she was home, I gave him her address. Better to get this over with quickly while I had the nerve to go through with it.
“This is a surprise,” she said when she answered the door.
Just one look at her in her satin leisurewear, which she wore when she was just hanging around her apartment, nearly blew away my resolve. I could see every curve of her body and the sharp points of her nipples through her top. I wanted to push her against the wall and devour her. But after weeks of doing just that, I was only turning into a bigger wreck. I couldn’t waste any more time.
“Come in,” she waved, eyeing my rolling luggage as I walked past her.
She hovered over it too long, catching a glimpse of the tag from the airport. “California, huh? Did you have a nice trip?”
“It was…it was for work,” I confessed. “I’ve…I’ve been taking other consulting jobs. Please don’t tell Lucas. He’d be pissed if he knew I was considering other offers right now, after what he proposed.”
“President, isn’t it? What he’s offering you?”
I nodded.
“You going to take it?”
All I could do was shrug.
“Why would I tell Lucas anything anyway?” she huffed, crossing her arms. “For all I know, you could be lying to me. Maybe you’re just flying all over the place to see other women. You have a reputation, you know. And it’s not like I’d have a right to say anything about it. We’re not a couple, after all.”
“I’ve never seen you like this before,” I noted. “Did I do something wrong?”
“I don’t know. Did you?”
I exhaled with a groan. “I can’t read your mind, Jada. Is this really all about other women? I told you. I’ve been traveling for other jobs. And I didn’t want you to know because I didn’t want it getting back to Lucas. I haven’t had time to see anyone else between you and my work at your family’s company. I definitely haven’t had time to consider your brother’s offer. But I’m done with lying. I’m not taking anymore consulting jobs while I’m here, until I’ve made up my mind. And…I need to make some other changes too.”
“Like what?” she asked, tapping her foot.
“That’s why I came here actually,” I said slowly, taking a seat on her couch. “I need to talk to you.”
“Oh, here it comes,” she laughed with anger. “I dared to confront you about what you might be doing on your little trips, and now I guess it’s over, huh? You only liked me because I was easy and didn’t ask any questions.”
“What?” I gaped. “No. No, you’ve got it all wrong. Jada, I’m worried about how distracting this has been for me. And it’s not your fault. I started it. But people at the office are starting to talk. If I reject Lucas’s offer, that’s one thing. But I don’t want it taken away from me because of…”
“Because of me!?” she fumed.
“Because of this.” I pointed between us. “I need to take some time and space to think. I don’t want to stop seeing you. I really don’t. But we have to back off for a little bit.”
“And you expect me to believe this doesn’t have anything to do with whoever is in California?”
“It does if you’re counting my contract work,” I argued. “That’s the only thing that’s in California. I like traveling, Jada. I like seeing the world and making money and learning about all sorts of new technology and business ideas. I’ve been very happy with my consulting work. I’m not so sure I want to settle down and…”
“I never asked you to settle down,” she snapped. “I never asked for any of this. I thought it would be a one time thing, but you kept coming back for more. It’s like you wouldn’t quit until I was hooked. Was that the challenge for you? I know all about your reputation with women and how you hate being tied down.”
“Where is all of this coming from?”
“Isabella filled me in on how you are,” she admitted, looking a little sheepish.
“Did you tell her about us?”
“No, but she sure acted like she knew something. Have you told anyone?”
“No! Why would I!? You know I’m terrified of your brothers finding out.” I stopped myself from telling her they were already suspicious. We were one wrong step away from them beating me up and kicking me out of the company and their lives forever.
“You’re certainly not denying your sister’s accusations.”
“Because it’s none of her business,” I barked. “And I don’t feed into gossip and rumors. I have better things to do. Izzy would too if she’d get a job.”
“I have a job and apparently I still have nothing better to do,” she murmured, storming off into the kitchen to open a bottle of wine. “She told me about Lucas’s job offer. Do you know what that was like? Hearing it from her instead of you or my siblings? I felt like an idiot. Or, at least I do now. Here I was starting to think if you took the job, maybe this thing between us could be more. I had no clue you were planning to break it off as soon as you got back.”
“And I had no idea you were waiting to come at me with all of this the second I walked in the door.”
“Sorry I didn’t give you time to come up with a bunch of lies and excuses,” she grumbled resentfully.
“I’m not breaking things off. At least I don’t think I am,” I struggled to explain. “I just need some time, like I said. To make some big decisions about my life.”
Jada let out a frustrated groan and turned from opening the bottle of wine to slamming around dishes in her sink. It was obvious she was trying to do anything and everything she could to avoid facing me.
“Please, Jada. Will you just stop and look at me? Talk to me?” I pleaded. “I didn’t mean for any of this to be what it is. I didn’t know this would…”
“I know all too well about what you expected,” she said. “You expected an easy lay. And I guess you kept wanting to come back for more. You know, when your sister kept going on about how you are, I kept telling myself she just didn’t know what I did. But then you show up here breaking things off, and I realize I should have taken her warning to heart.”
“Then maybe you should stop hanging out with my sister.”
“It was your idea! You were the one who gave me her contact information and told me to interview her!”
“I told you to interview her ab
out the app!” I shouted. “Not about me.”
Me raising my voice seemed to catch her off guard. She stopped over the sink, a dirty glass and sponge still in her hands. I watched her arms slowly drop and her eyes close, as if she was trying her hardest not to cry. I had to get out of there. I couldn’t stand to see her cry, knowing I was the reason why. And I had already yelled more than once. If I stayed any longer, I was only going to make things worse.
“I shouldn’t have come here straight from the airport,” I decided out loud. “It was a mistake. I’m tired and strung out. Nothing’s coming out right. I—I should go.”
“Yes. You should,” she said quietly.
The pain and quiet resolve in her voice tore me to shreds. I wanted to hold her, to kiss her. To chase all the bad away. But I brought all of this on her. If only I could have controlled myself that first night we had dinner, or any time after that. Better yet, if I could have kept my big mouth shut long enough to avoid asking her to dinner in the first place.
I quietly slipped out her door. Just outside, I hesitated for a moment, thinking of going back in. I didn’t know what I’d say or do. Walking away from her just felt wrong. But just as I turned for the door again, I heard the lock turn. She was ready for me to be gone and not come back.
Against my better judgment, I walked off down the hall towards the elevator, my heart sinking deeper with every step. I thought breaking things off would make me more clear-headed. I thought it would help. But it had only made things worse. Now in addition to facing this huge decision, I would have Jada’s heart weighing on my conscience, while my own heart was in just as bad a shape as hers.
16
Jada
After locking the door, I tried to go back to doing the dishes and pretending like everything was fine. What did I expect to happen anyway? I knew what kind of man Jack was. I knew what he was—or rather what he wasn’t looking for, which was anything committed or serious. And I wasn’t looking for that either…Was I?