by Addams, Kat
Thirteen
Rox
I slid on my usual black skirt and heels, pulled a fitted gray top over my head, and declared myself ready to go to The Steamy Clam. Of course, I’d been to strip clubs before. But this time would be different. This time, one of our own would be performing her debut—Nikki, aka Crystal Cream Pie. I didn’t even know what to expect, but with Nikki, I was prepared to have my mind blown. Whatever it took to get my mind off of Jay.
No matter how busy I had kept myself these last few weeks, I still thought about him often. I would flip through the TV channels and see a nature show based in Australia, I would walk in Target and see a koala nightshirt, or I’d hear a song that he had sung to me to lull me to sleep. I had seen a fire hydrant spewing the other day, and it’d even reminded me of his never-ending dick and the way it popped off like a champagne bottle.
Jay stayed in the back of my mind, no matter what was going on in my life.
I had been so distracted these last few weeks that I wasn’t able to focus much on anything. I threw myself into our taco business. Earl purchased us another truck, and training new employees was exhausting. Betty took the lead on that, thankfully, but I still had my hands in a million different things.
My volunteer time at the shelter was cut short as I focused on myself and the healing that I needed to do. I had become one of them—the ladies at the shelter, attending group classes regularly and not just sporadically, as I had done in my past. I fully committed myself to heal my scars and only healing my scars. DTF helped, Earl helped, the shelter helped. But there was still one thing missing that I felt had helped me more than anything. It was him. I missed Jay. His words had made me feel better about myself than I had in years, and I missed that—and him.
On nights I came home late, I always looked out toward his window, but his light was never on anymore. The first time I had seen it was turned off, I’d asked Layla if she’d heard from Aiden how Jay was doing. She’d told me he went back to Australia for business he needed to attend to.
They always run.
“For forever?” I asked Layla.
“No! No! Aiden said just for a little while. He had business to attend to—as in personal business.” Layla put her hand on my back and rubbed my shoulders.
“Okay, I guess. I hope he is okay?” I asked, wanting more information than the little bit she had given me.
“I can ask Aiden, but that was all he said. I’m sorry, honey. Are you thinking about trying to start talking to him again? I can see how you haven’t been smiling much at all without him. I think he was good for you.”
“But I want to be good for him too.”
“You are! But I get it. You need to believe that yourself. You’re almost there. I think you’ve put in enough work, and I can tell you’re coming around.”
“Thanks. I feel better. More confident. I just hope he’s still available when I get up enough confidence to step back into a relationship. When he said he loved me, I freaked out a bit. It wasn’t so much him saying it out loud, but when he said it, I realized I was falling in love with him too. I got scared. Chickened out. And still, my dumbass mistook his concern for control. I just want to react normally to stuff like that. I still beat myself up over it. I should have just fallen into his arms that night.”
Layla put her arms around me. “That would have been dreamy, but it also would have been the wrong thing to do. You did the right thing. Take your time, Rox. Jay will understand, and if he doesn’t, then fuck him. There are a million other men out there who would have you in a heartbeat.”
“But I’m pretty sure I only want that one heartbeat—his,” I whispered into her hair, letting myself collapse into her and cry.
If anyone could understand this gushy side of me, it was Layla.
“I know; I know.” She patted my back and stroked my hair, comforting me in her gentle way.
Layla had the motherly instinct that the rest of DTF lacked. We were all supportive and loving, but if we were sick and needed chicken soup, Layla was the one to call. We didn’t even need to ask her. She would bring it over along with anything else she could find to cheer us up. When I’d had the flu a few years back, she’d brought me over Chinese takeout, a stack of male porn magazines, a new vibrator, and meds. She stayed up late with me that night, laughing through the magazines and bingeing creepy documentaries on Netflix. As soon as she had left, I’d tested the new vibrator. She was a good friend.
I watched my reflection in the mirror, tracing a dark red color over my lips—the same lipstick I had worn when I first gave Jay a blow job in that sketchy Ferris wheel. I remembered the red ring around his cock as I’d left my mark on him. Now, he was probably in Australia, getting more rings around his cock in whatever color those women over there liked to use. A flare of jealousy flashed through me before I quickly pushed it back down.
I squeezed my small boobs together and tugged down my shirt. Tonight, I was going out to the strip club. And since I had been single and healing, I could afford to have a little fun.
DTF, minus Crystal Cream Pie, sat around the front of the stage. The only person missing from our crew was Earl, but that was because Nikki refused to tell him about tonight. Not that he wouldn’t approve. Knowing Earl, he would probably be the one throwing the most money at her. But he was still a father figure to us all, and that was just disgusting. We all agreed to keep Nikki’s alter ego under wraps.
I glanced around the packed room, noticing an even number of both men and women. “What’s going on tonight besides Crystal’s debut? It seems packed!” I asked a topless waitress whose boobs were two seconds from dipping into the cocktails that she had set in front of us. I didn’t care for my vodka with a side of nipple, but at the strip club, YOLO.
“We have four debuts tonight—two female, two male. Crystal is our icing on the cake if you ask me, but those boys we got dancing with us tonight, ladies, you just wait. I’ve never seen anything like it. Sometimes, they put on a skit together and have the woman in the middle, if you know what I mean. Maybe one of you lucky ladies can catch their eye tonight if they do that routine. I’d give anything to be in on that sandwich,” she said.
“Dibs!” Layla said.
“Well, there’re two. So, we each get one unless Rox here wants a turn. Then, we are going to have to fight it out.” Betty took the straw out of her drink and set it on the table before taking a long sip of her cocktail.
“Hmm … let me see what these men look like first,” I said, sitting back in my chair as the lights dimmed.
All three of us had our eyes glued to the stage when the first stripper came out. He looked oddly familiar, but I couldn’t put my finger on where I had seen him before.
“Terrance! Terrance! Oh my gosh! It’s Terrance!” Layla bounced in her seat.
Holy. Fuck, Betty mouthed, leaning forward in her chair.
“Shh! Oh my gosh. I can’t believe he works here too! I wonder if Nikki knew this. Why the hell didn’t she tell us?” I whispered only loud enough for the girls to hear me.
“I don’t know. Don’t care. I have been waiting to see what is under that apron of his at the bar. I’m going to enjoy this. Y’all, hush,” Betty said.
I had only seen that look in Betty’s eyes once before, back when she was dating the race-car driver. That look was dangerous. It meant she was about to devour something, and I was never sure if that was in a good or bad way.
I threw back my drink, not yet sure how I felt about watching Scarlett Herb’s bartender, who had been so friendly, about to shake his junk in all of our faces.
“Please welcome Mix Master Tito!” the announcer called from the back.
A single light illuminated Terrance—Tito’s—body as he stood in front of a rolling bar cart, waiting for the music to start. True to his other job, he wore an apron, a button-up shirt, and black slacks. I bit my lip, nervous for him.
The music began to play as he looked out into the crowd, caught Betty’s eye, and th
rust his hips forward. I heard an audible gasp come from her side of the table. Layla clutched her heart, and Betty’s bedroom eyes locked straight back on him.
Ah hell.
Tito ripped off his apron, his button-up, and lastly, his slacks, revealing nothing but a skimpy banana hammock. I didn’t have a clue how fast he had done all of that. I thought to myself that maybe he had a third job as a quick-change artist at a sideshow.
“Oh my gosh! Look at those muscles!” Layla squealed.
Tito spun around, splashing some liquor into a cocktail shaker, turning around again and shaking it so hard that his dick flopped around like a snake rearing back, ready to strike. I watched Betty’s head bob up and down in rhythm as he shook himself over to her. He humped the air down to the floor and slid on his back, stopping right in front of us. His hips rose, pumping his johnson up and down hard before he slowly poured whatever concoction he’d made in his shaker right over his abs.
He set the shaker down, got to his knees, and gyrated in front of us. The alcohol ran down his rippled chest, and he curled his finger and motioned for Betty to come here. She only had to move a few feet, and she would be in line with his whole package, which she took no time in doing. I shook my head as I watched Tito point to his abs and nod. Betty smiled, stuck her tongue out, and ran it from his navel to a nipple.
The crowd went wild. Mostly women, but some of the men even cheered for Betty. I couldn’t contain my laughter as I watched them flirt onstage. He pulled her up there, pushing her against the pole as he danced around her. Betty being Betty danced right back at him. They dry-humped each other until the song ended, and then he kissed her hand and helped her back offstage.
Layla and I both stared at Betty, waiting on her to say something.
“What?” Betty plopped herself back into her chair, pursed her lips, and finished her drink.
“What do you mean, what? That was the hottest striptease I’d ever seen! And to think, he is such a sweet bartender. I had no idea he was a ferocious beast,” Layla growled.
“Your ferocious beast owns Scarlett Herb, trick, so sit down. That one I’ll be taking home.” Betty snapped her fingers in the air and ended the conversation.
“Aiden is just a friend! Y’all need to stop it with all of that!” Layla crossed her arms and sat back.
“Shh! It’s her turn!” I shushed my two horny friends and focused on the next act.
Two nearly naked ladies cleaned up the wet stage before Crystal Cream Pie made her entrance.
“Fuck, this is amazing.” I laughed.
Betty and Layla nodded in agreement as we fell into the Cream Pie trance.
Nikki—Crystal—sauntered to the center of the stage in a sexy waitress outfit. She, too, had a rolling cart behind her, complete with cream pies. As the music began to play, she swung herself around the pole, climbing upside down and dropping to the floor in one quick movement that made all three of our jaws fall open.
We watched, wide-eyed, while she stripped her tiny shirt off and threw it into the crowd. A tall, bearded man caught it, sniffed it, and stuffed it in his pocket while he licked his lips and eye-fucked her.
“Well, that escalated quickly.” Betty’s eyebrows shot up into her hairline.
“Not like you were any less freak nasty up there onstage,” I muttered back to her.
Nikki tore her bra off, exposing her perky knockers to us all. The men hollered out, but we just nodded. It wasn’t like we hadn’t seen them before. She was known for whipping them out whenever. With Nikki, she didn’t stick her butt out to moon people as a joke. She raised her top and shook her boobs, just like she was doing now. She turned her back toward us and bent over, twerking her butt cheeks from side to side. I let out a loud whistle among the fifty others cheering her on. A group of men had gathered closer to the stage, throwing money out in front of her. She turned to us and winked before grabbing two of the cream pies off of the cart.
“What do you think she’s going to—oh my gosh!” Layla gasped as Crystal Cream Pie smashed the pies right onto her titties.
She gyrated back down to the crowd of men, sticking one of their heads right between her breasts, so he could give her a whipped-cream motorboat. She shook her boobs in his face and then his friend’s face, and Layla even rushed to the stage to get boobs in her face too.
“What the hell, girl? What’s wrong with you?” Betty’s voice trailed off as she shook her head at Layla.
“I wanted to get in on the fun too! Plus, I slipped a twenty in her G-string. Women supporting women,” she answered, picking up a napkin and wiping the whipped cream off of her cheeks.
“DTF!” I raised my glass to Nikki as she finished up her dance and disappeared backstage.
Everyone, including us, gave her a standing ovation.
“What a badass,” Betty said as we all laughed.
I felt like I needed to take a cold shower already.
“That was amazing. This is amazing. Thanks for taking me out tonight, girls. Glad we could come together and support one of our own.” I smiled.
“Just like we have been supporting you, love. I know it’s been tough these last few weeks, but we are still here for ya.” Layla reached across to squeeze my hand.
“It’s good you’re getting out. I know you’re finally coming around and being your old self again. I can see it in your eyes. You’re almost there. You’ve got this, Rox,” Betty said, winking at me.
“Thanks, ladies. One day at a time. This certainly helped. I’ve got some new inspiration at least. I think I’ll write a poem about cream pies. I need to make it funnier though. Maybe I’ll have her sit in it instead of rubbing it on her chest.” I shrugged.
“Lawd, don’t give that child any more ideas.” Betty shook her head.
I hadn’t had a night packed with this much fun since I could remember. I looked at every one of my friends, the sexy strippers slinging around their schlongs, and the money flying through the air. I thought to myself how it only seemed like yesterday that I had been in a very dark place. And now, I was beginning to see a lighter place. Even if that light was only the flickering neon lights of a strip club, it was still better than where I had been.
We stayed at The Steamy Clam until it shut down, laughing, talking, drinking, and catcalling men, women, and each other. Terrance even appeared again to give Betty an encore. Nikki explained all about stripper code and how she couldn’t tell us about him but wanted Betty to be shocked when she found out her favorite flirty bartender could bust a move anyway. We left the club exhilarated.
When my Uber dropped me off back at my house, I instinctively looked toward Jay’s window in hopes that his light would be turned on. It wasn’t. I felt a slight lingering sadness, but I put one foot in front of the other, tilted my chin up, and marched through my door.
It had been two weeks since Crystal Cream Pie’s debut when the girls said that they wanted to take me out for another fun night. They had said we would go to The Lounge later this evening since it was poetry night, but I needed to dress up because we were going out afterward. Betty mentioned drinks at Scarlett Herb, so I needed to wear something classy and sexy. I wasn’t sure that I was ready yet to make as big of a step as going to Scarlett Herb again, but she insisted it would help me with any closure I might need.
It had been nearly two months since I last saw or heard from Jay. Aiden stopped by his place every so often to check on things. I only knew that because he had bumped into me outside one of the times. It had been slightly awkward, but he’d made sure to tell me that Jay was coming back and that he was only finishing up some business.
I thought about the night of our argument often and how it was a big misunderstanding on both of our parts. We were both broken. He was, too, whether he could admit it or not.
I smoothed down my dress and settled into Betty’s car. She had volunteered to pick us all up tonight and be the designated driver. That was extremely out of character for her, so I was already on edge when we
arrived at poetry night.
“Wow! Look at you!” Betty said.
The rest of DTF whistled from the backseat.
“Thanks! You all look pretty hot yourselves!” I said, nodding at my girls.
We chatted about our day but mostly drove in silence, which, again, was unusual. I didn’t know if it was the nervousness of heading to Scarlett Herb looming over my head or what.
“What is this?” I asked as soon as we pulled up to The Lounge.
I had never seen so many cars here before. There wasn’t an empty parking space available around the entire building. Betty circled the lot several times, ultimately deciding on parking across the street.
“No clue,” DTF answered in unison.
I glanced at Layla and Nikki in the backseat. Layla had a smile on her that stretched from ear to ear, and Nikki avoided my eyes. Something was up. A feeling of unease settled in my stomach.
“Bullshit. Is something going on with the shelter tonight? Betty! Look at me. I know you won’t lie to me. What is it?” I asked, panic rising in my voice.
“Oh, Rox. I wish I could say. Let’s just go check it out, okay?” Betty’s eyes looked around everywhere but at me.
I scooted down into my seat, wondering what trouble I was about to walk into. I closed my eyes, concentrating on any significant events that I had forgotten about. A mental calendar of everyone’s birthdays ran through my head until it landed on Earl’s upcoming sixtieth celebration.
“Is this Earl’s birthday party? Why wouldn’t you tell me?” I sat back up, turning in my seat to give death stares at the girls in the back.
“It’s not Earl’s birthday,” Nikki mumbled, tugging at the crystal that hung around her neck. Her eyes shifted toward Layla, who was shaking her knee back and forth.