by Jayne Hawke
Dad was heartbroken. He barely spoke for a year after we lost her. Jake’s mom put everything she had into tracking down her killer. She was onto something when she disappeared and never came back. We received word that her body had been found a couple of months later.
I choked back tears as I tried to pull myself together and stop being so weak. Lots of people would kill to be a garou, and here I was sobbing over everything I’d lost. The supernatural world was a dark and cruel place. I took a deep breath and focused on what I needed to do to take down that rogue. If I couldn’t be a baker any more, then I’d be a bounty hunter like my mom. She was a force to be reckoned with.
This was my first real mercenary or bounty hunting job. The most dangerous job we’d picked up before was taking some potions from one witch coven to another. There was a tight time limit and a risk of the potions exploding, but that was still nothing compared to taking down a rogue garou.
A quiet voice in the back of my mind really wished our moms were there right then. They’d have been able to show me the ropes. They weren’t there, though. I was a grown-ass woman, and I was going to figure out how to do this for myself.
I pulled out a notebook and began making lists. That was something I’d started doing when I was about twelve. Whenever I wasn’t sure or I needed to bring order to my world, I picked up a notebook and put everything into neat little lists.
First, I needed to figure out any possible clues about who the rogue was and what they wanted. They had clearly lured me out, which meant they had chosen me specifically to turn. That wasn’t the act of a deranged out-of-control rogue. They were usually thought to be mindless beasts, having lost contact with both human and wolf side. No one quite knew what exactly made someone turn into a rogue. There were theories that there were certain personalities and even bloodlines that were predisposed to it. I added that to my list.
I chewed on my bottom lip, trying to think through possible reasons for them to pick me out of everyone. It could be an act of revenge, but that was weird. I’d kept my head down, so that would suggest it was revenge for something my mother did. I was too young to know the details of whom she hunted. There had to be records somewhere, though. I added that to my list. There was the possibility they wanted me in their pack, but rogues didn’t have packs. Then again, this clearly wasn’t a normal rogue. I added it to the list.
The wolf hadn’t looked particularly special, from what I remembered. I made notes on its appearance from what I could recall. I’d been pretty focused on stabbing the bastard rather than looking for identifying marks. It had been large, but that was normal for a garou. Well-muscled, pale grey with soft gold along its spine and tail. Its eyes were dark amber. I didn’t recall any weird colours or anything.
In the movies, I’d be able to go looking for someone recovering from stab wounds to the ribs and shoulders, but garou healed ridiculously quickly. It would likely have healed from those wounds within an hour or less. I needed to ask Cole about that, what the limits were on healing capability. Curling my lip, I realised just how much I was going to depend on Cole over the coming weeks. I’d have to stick with him through my first full moon.
Garou could control their shift, but they were pushed to shift on the full moon. There was something about the pull of it on those nights that really got under their skin. I thought that turned garou were forced to shift that night, which was something I was not looking forward to.
Usually, I would have looked at the Grim for updates, but I didn’t want to know what they were saying about me on there. I was already pushed to the periphery of the groups, being turned as I was would likely make me the subject of much mockery. That was the last thing I needed right then.
11
A knock came from the door, and my stomach sank. I wasn’t quite sure how I knew, maybe I recognised his footsteps, but I knew it was Cole. My wolf side was not going to allow him into my home. That was a hard limit.
He knocked again, and I stood to go and speak to him. My teeth were itching where the wolf was pushing forward and trying to initiate a shift. I wasn’t sure how I was going to deal with him for a month without sinking my teeth into his throat. No one had ever had that effect on me before.
I opened the door to find Cole looking down at me with his hands tucked in the pockets of his designer jeans. A smirk sat on his pretty his face, but his eyes remained hard as he assessed and challenged me without saying a single word. He went to walk into the apartment, and I moved to block him. I didn’t look away or make a big deal out of it. I simply stepped to the side and smiled at him.
“No,” I said.
A low growl rumbled in his throat, and his eyes yellowed a little. I held back a victorious grin at seeing his reaction.
“This is my territory,” I growled back, refusing to back down.
He narrowed his eyes and looked into the apartment behind me. I had entered his home without a fight, and yet I wasn’t allowing him to step foot in mine. It was a dangerous dance, but it was something that I wasn’t going to budge on. Social rules be damned.
“We have business to conduct,” Cole said pointedly.
I raised an eyebrow. I didn’t remember having agreed to any business with him.
“Excuse me?”
“We have someone to track down. That can’t be discussed out in the apartment complex hallway,” he said coolly.
I’d somehow forgotten that I had to work with him on tracking down the rogue. Of course that was why he was there.
“Looks like we’re heading to yours, then, doesn’t it?” I said smiling sweetly.
“You should pack some things so you don’t need to come back here,” he said, edging closer.
I rolled my eyes. He was so certain that I would just roll over and move in with him because he growled a little. That apartment with Jake was my home. I’d already lost my bakery dream, I was not going to give up my home, too.
“Not a chance in Hell.”
“You heard the council,” he pushed
His gaze intensified, and I felt something pushing against my mind. I got the impression that he was trying to be all alpha on me, but it wasn’t working.
“They said I had to see you once a week. I can do that just fine living here.”
With that, I closed the door in his face and went to find my favourite ass-kicking boots. I was going to try and remain calm, but I wanted to be ready if things went south.
He had insisted that I take off my boots when I walked into his house. I’d learned early on to pick and choose my battles, and that was not the hill to die on. We sat in his kitchen on opposite sides of his heavy farmhouse table just staring at each other. He hadn’t even offered me a drink. It felt like some sort of respect test, and I was failing hard.
I’d never been one of those who had to lead. I was happy to step back if someone else wanted to lead. Since I’d been turned, any chill I had about backing down had evaporated. Whatever it was that made me that way got turned up to a thousand with Cole.
“Aren’t you supposed to be teaching me all about being a garou?” I finally said after ten minutes of staring.
He huffed and leaned back, crossing his arms and flexing his biceps. I mirrored the pose, but it didn’t look as impressive on me. My biceps were pretty good for a girl, thanks to years of baking, but I was still much smaller than him.
“I’m assuming you know nothing, given your blatant disrespect.”
I smiled sweetly.
“Garou live in packs. They’re usually formed from families, but sometimes people will leave and form or join another pack. Each garou is born with a certain amount of dominance. The most dominant ones go on to become alphas. Turned cannot be alphas, or betas. They’re too weak.”
Now that sounded like a challenge if ever I heard one.
“Is that so?” I asked innocently.
His jaw clenched, and his eyes began to amber. I turned up my obnoxious sweetness.
“You need to become one with your
wolf. You are your wolf. The anger you’re feeling is where you’re trapping your wolf, and that’s the only outlet that side of you has.”
I had to admit that if I was a wild animal trapped inside a dark box in someone’s mind, I’d be pretty angry, too.
“And how do I do that, exactly?”
He rolled his eyes and got up to make some coffee.
“You’re the badass merc. You should be able to figure it out,” he said sarcastically.
I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. This jerk wasn’t going to beat me. If I had to become one with my inner beast or something, then that is what I would do.
The wolf, my other side, was there in my mind. I felt it sitting patiently in the darkness waiting for its moment. I nudged and poked at it until I saw a full image of it. Unlike the rogue, the wolf I saw had red fur with slate-grey socks. I mentally ran my tongue over my teeth and tried to think about the wolf as being me. It was a weird sensation.
Something began to change in my mental landscape. The distance between myself and the wolf closed, and the anger slipped away just a little. The instincts and desires didn’t feel quite so alien. I opened my eyes when I heard Cole gently place a cup of coffee down in front of me. It wasn’t going to happen overnight, but I knew that I could do this. I needed to let go of the frustration of everything I’d lost and embrace everything I’d gained. Baking had meant the world to me, but it wasn’t the be all and end all. Now I was going to live a much longer life, which would allow me to experience more things. I was stronger, faster, with better senses, and I could heal. That was a pretty good set of benefits.
Cole’s pretty golden-green eyes smiled even though his mouth was fixed in a permanent scowl. I resisted the urge to remind him to smile. We were making a little progress, after all.
“When you shift for the first time, you won’t be able to control it.”
I waited for him to continue. He wasn’t staring me down anymore, but he was watching me very closely. I kept my gaze on his eyes, because I wasn’t going to back down quite that easily.
“The shift will tear through you, and you’ll have the need to run. That is when you become full garou.”
A spark of hope ignited in me. Did that mean I could return to being a bland human if I wanted?
His lip curled.
“This is a blessing, a gift. Do you have any idea how many people would kill to become a garou? And no. There is no ‘cure’. People have tried. There are rumours and myths of a dangerous magic that can do it, even after your first shift, but they’re wrong. The magic is entwined with your soul now,” he growled.
Clearly, the topic of not wanting to be a garou was a sore point.
“Got it,” I said with a smile.
“I assume you’ve heard of hunters.”
I said nothing.
He shook his head and muttered about being stuck with an arrogant turned. I’d heard of the existence of hunters, but I hadn’t had any reason to really look into them. They didn’t go after humans, and they didn’t offer any jobs.
“Hunters believe that garou and shifters are abominations that must be controlled. They will target witches if they feel they’re stepping out of line, but their focus is garou and shifters. If you’re lucky and make sure you’re careful, the hunters will leave you alone. Some groups are more bloodthirsty than others. We had the good fortune of having the Blackthorne family move into this territory. They lead the group that thinks all garou and shifters should be bound.”
“Bound?” I asked.
He rolled his jaw.
“That would make us pets and soldiers. We would be bound to hunters, or acceptable witches. They would be able to control our shifts and track us at all times.”
I found myself baring my teeth at that thought. I wasn’t surprised that such people existed. There would always be those who sought to control those around them. That didn’t make it any more palatable. Garou were sentient beings capable of running businesses, raising families, and so much more. Yet those hunters and witches would make them pets. It was repulsive.
“So, we’ll take them out?” I said with a shrug.
He snorted.
“They’re powerful, and they’ve put a lot of effort into building an army of allies around themselves. We need to keep our heads down.”
I didn’t like the sound of that. I’d never been one to ignore bullies. I used my martial arts to help a few smaller weaker kids out in school. The teachers weren’t too happy about my methods, but it worked. These Blackthornes didn’t seem any better. It wasn’t an elegant solution, but it would be an effective one.
He held up his hand.
“They will be dealt with when we have the allies and political back-up we need,” he said with a cold certainty.
I nodded. I could play the long game if I needed to.
12
“You need to run regularly. Have you been for a run since you were turned?”
“No.”
I used to run every day after the bakery, but I’d fallen out of the routine due to stress.
“We’re going to your place so you can change into something more suited to running. Then we’re going for a run.”
“Yay,” I said sarcastically.
I enjoyed running, and I was happy to be running soon. It was the idea of running with him that made me reluctant. Every now and again I’d run with Jake, but it was usually a solitary activity, and I enjoyed it that way. It gave me the room and time to breathe and really get my head straight. I couldn’t relax while Cole was so close.
“You’re going to run in that?” I said when I realised he hadn’t mentioned himself changing.
Designer jeans weren’t exactly made for running around the forest in.
Cole ignored my sarcasm and stood looking pointedly at the hallway behind me. I took the cue and headed out to the front door, where I put my shoes on and headed out to his car. He emerged a few minutes later in a pair of sweats and an older t-shirt. The sweats showed off his strong muscular thighs and narrow hips. I looked away, reminding myself what a jerk he was.
He drove fast and aggressively, pushing every limit. I fought hard to keep it from my face, but I enjoyed the thrill of it. Jake was an excellent driver, but he didn’t push his car unless we were out in the countryside where it was completely safe to do so.
We were soon back in front of my apartment building. Cole parked next to my beaten-up old Mustang and really put it to shame. He clearly took good care of his car, whereas mine was in need of a wash and a lot of work. I pushed aside the shame and headed inside, leaving him to follow me if he chose. I wasn’t letting him inside the apartment, so it would probably be wiser for him to wait outside.
Jake still wasn’t home, which wasn’t entirely surprising. He hadn’t replied to my news about the bakery, which likely meant he’d found some girl to occupy his afternoon. I dropped my phone on my bed and changed into a pair of shorts, a t-shirt, and my running shoes. A quick glance at my phone, and I decided to leave it there. Jake was the only person I’d call, and he wasn’t responding. I was a garou now. I’d handle whatever the world threw at me.
Cole was leaning against his car with his strong arms crossed over his hard chest. He greeted me with one of those increasingly familiar scowls. Neither of us said as a word as we crossed the road and headed into the forest. An eagerness filled me as we walked between the mature trees and I felt the packed earth beneath my feet. After five minutes of walking and stretching, we moved up into a steady jog.
My competitive edge soon kicked in, and I pushed to go a little faster. Cole matched it without so much as glancing at me. Slowly, we kept increasing the pace, pushing each other on until we were tearing through the forest, racing up a steep hill. Normally, my muscles would have been burning and my breath coming in sharp gasps, but I felt good. No, I felt amazing. The adrenaline coursed through me, and I felt as though I was doing what I was meant to do. Cole edged over the top of the hill a fraction of a second be
fore me. Damn him and his longer legs.
I kept up with him despite his being almost a foot taller than me. There wasn’t a chance in hell I was going to give in and let him win. We shot around a corner and almost skidded to a halt when we found a pair of middle-aged people with guns standing there looking at us. Cole subtly moved in front of me as he assessed them.
“Cole Loxwood,” the older woman with short pale-blonde hair said sharply.
She was dressed in smart hiking trousers with an expensive looking shirt. A large knife sat on her hip and another in her boot. She was formed of sharp edges. I was left with the distinct feeling that she wouldn’t think twice about ending someone’s life and had likely already taken many before.
“Ainsley Blackthorne,” Cole returned.
My blood ran cold. The man raised his gun just a little, and his eyes hardened into small shards of flint. These were two of the hunters Cole had mentioned. The man hadn’t caught my attention until he moved. He was far less striking with muddy brown hair, a weather-worn look, and almost watery blue eyes. Creases spread out from the corners of his eyes and wrapped around his mouth. His jaw was set, and he looked as though he’d forgotten how to smile.
“You shouldn’t be here,” the man said, taking a step closer to us.
Cole squared his shoulders and stared the man down. They were almost equal in height, but Cole had a lot of muscle on the other guy. Cole bristled with aggression, but his facial expression remained almost bored. He wasn’t going to let these hunters get under his skin. I needed to learn how to do that.
“Actually, it’s you who shouldn’t be here.” I could feel Cole’s smirk. “This is my land,” Cole said.