by Kara Griffin
Annabella pointed toward the entrance and drew his attention away from the man next to him. Callum’s brows furrowed slightly as he listened to the man, but his expression turned fierce when he spotted Keith.
Keith Sutherland entered the hall and approached him. Violet pressed her hand on her chest and prayed they wouldn’t brawl, especially in front of the future queen. She stood near and gave a look of concern to Clive and hoped he’d intercede, but it wasn’t necessary when Callum greeted Keith with a cordial tone.
“Keith, I’m glad you’re here. You got my message. Join us.”
She shook her head as the two took hands in greeting and Keith spoke quietly to Callum. Callum nodded and seemed appeased to have Keith there. None interrupted their conversation, but Annabella handed them each a drink and retreated to the table.
The revelry of the feast grew loud as the drink raised the voices of those within the hall. Two men danced by the musicians and jests were shouted across the tables. Callum’s uncle Lockie spun around in the corner and dropped his cup. Mor laughed and helped him retrieve it. Dela played near the hearth with her kittens, and thankfully, Frang was outside. Clive and his father began a drinking game and several soldiers stood around them and called out wagers of who could drink more. Ian had apparently more experience with drink than Clive did. It was the first time she’d seen the Sinclairs truly enjoy themselves.
Violet didn’t want to leave the feast, but she sat alone. Even Gussy had the fair company of Bailey. If she was forced to leave, Violet would be alone. She might as well get used to it. What a regretful mood she was in. She’d always had Gussy to lean on when times were troublesome. But it was obvious Gussy had a sentiment for the cook and Violet only wanted her friend’s happiness. She sighed at the thought that she’d lose the contentment that she’d found.
“What has you so gloomy?” Keith took the bench across from her.
She startled from her reverie and glanced at him. “Oh, Keith, it is good to see you. I’m guessing with your presence that you and Callum have made amends?”
He grinned and nodded. “Somewhat. There is still work to do to sway Callum, but aye we’ve come to an understanding. You didn’t answer my question. Why do I see sadness in your eyes? They should shine with their beauty and a smile.”
She scoffed. “You are incorrigible.”
“You’re right. None will change my view of you. Have you told Callum how you feel yet? Has he admitted he cares for you? I know he does. I told him he should―”
Violet shook her head and stood. “No, he hasn’t. There’s no longer anything between us. I really must retire. Good eve, Keith.”
He rose but scowled. “What do you mean nothing between you? You cannot say that and not explain.”
“Callum doesn’t hold me with regard, that’s all. I must go.”
“It’s early, too young in the night to seek your bed. They’ve only just served the meal and you haven’t eaten.”
“I’m afraid I don’t feel well enough to stay any longer. I am glad you and Callum remedied your disagreement and I’m sorry if I caused you any grief.”
“Not at all. My discord with Callum has nothing to do with you.” Keith bowed to her. “Have a good rest then, Milady. I hope you fare better.”
Violet hurried away. As much as she wanted to tell Keith what happened, that Callum insisted she leave for England, she didn’t want to anger him. Keith would probably have raised his voice to Callum and caused more difficulties between them. She didn’t want them to argue over her again and suspected Callum had regretted the last scuffle they’d had. At least they’d come to some accord. But if she hadn’t caused their rift, she wondered what had.
As Violet readied for bed, she pulled her satchel from under the bed and tossed in most of her belongings. On the morrow, she might very well have to leave. But before she admitted defeat, she would make one last effort to sway Callum’s sentiment. She had to do whatever it took to stay on Sinclair land and if that meant she had to fight for him, she would. One way or another, she would confront Callum and force him to admit his feelings for her.
Chapter Nineteen
Callum stood by the stables and bid Annabella a farewell. Her party rode out to meet her husband who encamped nearby. She’d made the excuse that John didn’t wish to entertain at his keep and stayed behind. He surmised Annabella didn’t permit him to join her, because John ailed, not in a sickly way, but mentally. Hearsay alluded to witnesses who claimed John sometimes didn’t know those closest to him. Rumors abounded that he’d taken to fits when he didn’t recognize where he was, as well.
He was relieved Annabella would do what she could to help return Violet’s bairn. During their discussion at the previous night’s feast, Annabella told him she was good friends with King Richard’s wife Anne. England’s queen was notorious for her aid to gain her husband’s pardon for many who reaped his disfavor or disagreement on many issues. Annabella alluded to the young queen’s personable manner and she was liked by many. Hopefully, she would help Annabella and thereby, send Cora back to her mother. It was the only way he might bring joy to Violet.
He was also interested in Annabella’s view on her husband’s rule when he’d become king. The current king was reputed to be aged and left the rule of the kingdom to his sons. The earl of Carrick, John, Annabella’s husband, would come to rule if he wasn’t challenged by his brother. She’d told him the king had finished his business in the northern region. He would make his way to Dundonald Castle, where he would convalesce, but it was doubtful he’d recover, and his death was imminent. Annabella wanted to reach the king before he succumbed.
The political dealings of his country troubled him, but Callum had difficulties of his own. Namely, finding Hammond and Elias. But more importantly, saying farewell to Violet.
When he’d told her about Henry’s missive, he felt wretched to cause her unhappiness. To see such sadness in her eyes thoroughly defeated him. Callum could name a hundred reasons for her to stay, but he wouldn’t. Throughout the feast, he forced himself to keep his gaze from seeking her. He tried hard to focus on conversation, drink, and his clansmen. All to no avail, and he failed. When she’d left the hall after speaking with Keith, his friend’s concern for her further sunk his shoulders.
He returned to the hall to wait for her to come down. While he waited, he met with Clive who gave his morning report. He dismissed his cousin and had cut their conversation short. His mind was preoccupied with his dismay. He had to send her off for her own good, so why did it bother him so much?
Violet strolled past the great hall’s door, but she didn’t enter. He followed her and reasoned she might leave without saying farewell. That she would do so angered him and he needed to make sure she didn’t leave without giving him a chance to explain. He owed it to her, to at least tell her why he told her to leave. Callum reached the steps outside and he frowned as he watched her progress through the courtyard and toward the gate. Where in bloody hell was the woman going?
He marched forward but was stopped by Clive who wanted to know what to do about Hawisa’s body. They still hadn’t found Elias and until they did, he delayed her burial. It was right that her father attended and he wouldn’t proceed until Elias returned.
“Leave her in the cold storage. I must go.” He sidestepped Clive and continued in his pursuit of Violet. When he reached the gates, he asked the lad who stood guard, “Have you seen Lady Violet?”
The young soldier nodded. “Aye, Laird. She took my horse and rode out.”
He pressed his eyes and pleaded for patience. “She took your horse and you let her?” Callum hadn’t meant to sound angry, but the young soldier had no sense.
Peter stammered his lengthy explanation, “I…did because…well, she said she only wanted to take a morning ride. I didn’t…wish to upset her…and so I… let her take him. Milady said she could seat a horse, and he’s docile my horse, so she won’t be harmed.”
Callum scoffed, tilted his h
ead back, and prayed for patience. “Did she say where she was going?”
“Nay, Laird, and I didn’t think I should ask. Do you want me to go after her? She’s only a few minutes gone and shouldn’t be too hard to catch.” He jumped down from the perch where he stood guard.
He shook his head, did a turn-about, and trotted toward the stables. Callum hurried to saddle his horse and rode hastily toward the gate. Neil tried to stop him when he shouted for him, but Callum waved him away.
“I’ll speak to you when I return,” he yelled. Callum kicked his horse’s haunches to get him moving. Violet had a good lead on him and he worried about her safety. Only she would be brazen enough to take a soldier’s mount and ride off to god knows where. She damned well better be unharmed.
He rode in the direction of the village but didn’t spot her along the road. When he reached the lane of hawkers, she was nowhere to be seen. He turned his horse and rode back toward the castle. But he kept riding, and as he approached the barren land near the high cliffs, he saw her far ahead. His breath rushed out with his relief. When he reached where she’d tethered her horse to a high weed, he dismounted and secured his own.
He approached cautiously so he wouldn’t startle her. She peered out at the sea as if she was in deep thought and didn’t hear him. Callum stalked closer and cleared his throat to get her to notice him. He stood near but not close enough to touch her.
“Violet… Are you…all right, lass?”
“Oh, Callum, it’s you.”
“What are you doing here? Peter said you took his mount and I worried you’d hurt yourself―”
Violet kept her gaze ahead and wouldn’t look at him. “You have no right to worry about me.”
“You’re angry.”
She settled her hands on her hips, but still wouldn’t turn her gaze to him. “You’re damned right I am. You, Laird Sinclair, are being an ass. It’s time I told you, what you need to hear.”
He took a deep breath but said nothing. After a few moments of silence, he sidled next to her. “And I suppose you feel it’s your right to tell me?”
“When my husband died, I was devastated. Not because I loved him, but because I didn’t know what would happen to me. I was so alone and scared. Then Henry bid me to come here and he told me that you were unsettled. It gave me hope to help someone because I couldn’t help myself. I wish he’d told me more because I certainly wouldn’t have tried to win your heart if I’d known how despaired you were. You’re scared too, are you not?”
Callum tried to take her hand because the distress in her tone displeased him. He hoped to ease her anguish, but she jerked her arm away.
“Don’t. Henry told me to do whatever it took to win your affection so I might stay here. If I’d only known how hard it would be… But I promised him I would, and he bade me to seduce you. Is that not laughable? Me seduce you. But then I softened toward you the moment you touched me when Frang harmed me that first day. What a fool am I?”
“Violet…”
“Please, let me speak my peace and then you can forget me. I didn’t want to fall in love with you, Callum. I promised, didn’t I, that I wouldn’t speak words of love to you. Well, I’m sorry, but I must and I can no longer keep it to myself. I thought myself incapable of love. I couldn’t love Charles though I wanted to. No other man stirred me the way you do even with your aloof manner. Unbeknownst to me, you won my heart. I won’t take it back, because I love you more than I should. I wish you would cease your ridiculous sentiment about being undeserving. Let me tell you, I am not Lydia. I am not a deceiver and I would never be unfaithful. When I love someone I love them forever. If you cannot love me, I shall leave and not return. You won’t have to see me again.” She peered at him with contempt and kept her hands settled on her hips.
“I don’t know what to say…” A lump formed in his throat as he let her words sink in his mind. She loved him and the rest of her tirade wounded him. He flinched at the thought that he’d made her completely miserable.
“Of course you don’t. Say you care for me. Say you don’t want me to leave. Say you were wrong to keep away. Tell me something, anything, but don’t say farewell.”
Callum’s shoulders slouched when a tear trickled over her cheek. Woe rendered her words a sorrowful tone, and he dejected at the sight of the misery on her bonny face. He didn’t seek to cause her tears or bring her unhappiness. “You’re right, I am an arse.”
“I want to fight for you, but I don’t know how. You’re not alone, Callum. You have me. No matter what troubles there are in your clan, no matter what difficulties you face, I long to be there for you, but you won’t let me help you.”
He wouldn’t allow her to move away from him and took her hand. “I desire that more than anything, but what about Cora? You want to return for her, don’t you? I thought―”
“I must accept that she won’t return to me. If I searched all of England, I wouldn’t find her. Richard hides her well. I pray she is unharmed and is not abused. Oh, God, I cannot bear to think of that. If Henry’s men haven’t found her by now, it is unlikely they will. How am I, a woman without means, supposed to search throughout the land? All Charles’s wealth and property were seized by Richard. I was left with nothing. As much as it saddens me, I must accept Cora’s loss.” She sniffled and tried to retract her hand.
Callum wouldn’t let her. “The last thing I wish is for you to leave. You are everything I’ve ever wanted. There are too many dangers here and I won’t put you in peril. You’ve suffered enough.”
“You don’t get to decide that for me. If I want to risk my neck because I love you, you should let me. You have an entire army at your disposal. Couldn’t you guard me to ensure my safety? Besides, the only person who tried to harm me was Hawisa and she… is no longer a threat.”
“You’re right. But you don’t understand what I’ve been through. It’s easy to believe that my life can be happy when you smile at me. Yet I don’t want to bring you woe. It seems that’s all I do…”
She turned again and peered at the view. “If you’ll let me, I can save you. That’s all I wish for, to save you while there is still something left to save.”
“I care for you, Violet. Say you’ll stay then. We’ll figure out how to keep you safe, but I don’t want to be without you.” He pulled her toward him and settled his hands on her shoulders. “You mean everything to me. I never wanted you to leave.”
She tilted her head back and he kissed her sweet lips. Callum’s tension eased as she returned his kiss with passion. When he pulled away, he smiled. “I never thought you were like Lydia. But I was with her for years and she never cared for me the way you do. I want more of your care and if that makes me selfish then I shall own it gladly.”
She chuckled and pressed a hand on his face. “You did nothing to earn her scorn. I shall make certain you are cared for. I promise, Callum. Just be truthful with me in the future. I’m a good listener if you wish to share your troubles. And if you change your mind and tell me to return to England, I shall go. I just want your happiness.”
“You’re a bonny lass, aye, and I don’t deserve you. But I will take whatever you wish to give.” He set another kiss on her lips and leaned his head against hers. “My heart beats fast, feel it.” He pressed her hand against his chest. “And if anyone would fight for me, I’m glad it’s you.”
Violet gave him a splendid smile that reached her eyes. “I will always stand by you.” She turned and peered at the waters beyond the cliffs. “It’s beautiful here. I shall want to come here often. Promise you’ll bring me.” Violet stepped closer to the cliff’s edge. She gazed downward at the rocks below.
“I will bring you, but you must vow to take a docile mare and not a soldier’s horse.” He laughed and stepped next to her and took her hand. “I didn’t mean to hurt you and never meant to cause discord between us. Tell me you forgive me.”
“I forgive you, Callum, and will always.”
He squeezed her hand
. “We should return before it gets dark.”
“Callum, what’s that?” She pointed at the rocks at the cliff’s bottom. “Something is there.”
He shot his gaze to a dark object at least thirty feet below. “I…don’t… It looks like a…”
“A body? I think it’s a man.”
Callum studied the object and discerned a man lying beneath on the rocks where the water couldn’t reach. It was obvious the man was dead and he suspected it was Hammond. “We need to return to the keep now.”
She followed him to the horses and they rode back. “Callum, I just want you to know I meant everything I said.”
He was humbled by her kindness and affection. Why did God send him an angel? He was most fortunate that Henry thought of him when she needed to flee England. It had to be God’s will that she found her way to him. Violet cared for him, but more than that she saved him. Aye, she saved him from a life of despair. She said she wanted to fight for him and she had.
Callum couldn’t deny he was impressed with her vigor. “I know you did, lass. And I meant every word I said too.”
Chapter Twenty
Violet handed the reins of the horse to the gate watch, a man named Peter, who continually apologized to Callum, for what she had no idea. She walked with Callum toward the main keep, but he stopped her from entering. His clansmen watched as he pressed his cheek against hers. He nuzzled her cheek for a moment but drew back.
“I must go to deal with… I don’t want to leave you, but I need to retrieve the body. It may take a while because it’s a long journey to reach the base of the cliff. I might be gone a day or two.” He clasped her hand and didn’t seem to want to release her.