I shake my head as my eyes fill with tears. “I’m sorry. I can’t do this right now.” Without another word, I push away from the table, grab my purse and keys, and leave the apartment as quickly as I can.
I climb behind the wheel of my truck with tears streaming down my face. My vision is blurry, but I start the truck anyway. Wiping my eyes, I shift into drive and kick up rocks from leaving so fast. I don’t pay any attention to where I’m going, and I don’t think about it until I find myself pulling up at the ranch.
Tyler doesn’t step out of the barn like normal, so I keep heading down the old dirt road that leads to his cabin at the back of the property. The second the truck is shut off and I’m swinging the door closed behind me, he opens the screen door. He reads the pain on my face and rushes over.
“Amy, what’s wrong?” He pulls me against his chest.
I can’t form words right now. All I can do is shake my head and let the tears fall.
He picks me up against him and carries me into the cabin. Moving through the living room, he carries me to the bedroom where he softly places me on the bed.
He doesn’t try to remove any clothing; he just climbs in behind me and pulls me to his chest, blanketing me with his heat, love, and understanding. I know if anyone understands, it’s Tyler. He doesn’t have the best relationship with his parents either.
After several long minutes, once I’ve gotten my tears and breathing under control, I finally break the silence. “Tyler, can I ask you something?”
“Anything,” he whispers, his breath causing my hair to tickle my cheek.
“If your parents called right now and said that they were sorry for everything, could you forgive them? If they said that they were finally giving you everything you’ve ever wanted, could you leave the past in the past?”
He takes a deep breath. “I’m guess your mom has asked for your forgiveness, and you’re not sure if you can grant her that?”
I nod, more tears slipping out.
He waits a while longer like he’s thinking over my question. Finally, he answers.
“I’d like to think I could forgive them—that I’d be able to leave everything in the past and move forward, and get our relationship back to the way it was, maybe even better.”
“I don’t know if I can forgive my mom,” I state flatly.
He squeezes me tighter. “Amy, what you decide about your mom is up to you, and I’ll support anything you choose, but why wouldn’t you try? I mean, saying you’ll try doesn’t guarantee that it’ll happen. All it means is that you want a relationship with your mom—that you want it enough that you’re willing to leave the past in the past and focus on the future the two of you can have together. And if things don’t work out, then at least you’ll be able to say that you tried.”
My heart is still pounding away with nervousness and anger. I feel like I have a right to feel the way I do, but I also feel guilty. Here she is, after all these years of drinking, sober and begging for my forgiveness, and I can’t even put everything behind us and start over? I know that if even the slightest thing goes wrong, it could set her off again and make her slip. And I’m running away and refusing to give her the only thing she’s asked for? God, what’s wrong with me? Why can’t I be like Ethan and just say, “I love you, Mom, and I forgive you”? Am I really that bad of a person? By not forgiving her, does that make me any better than she was when she was drinking herself to death?
I take a deep breath and slowly let the air escape my lungs. “You’re right. I should’ve told her that I was proud of her and that I would work on our relationship instead of running away like a spoiled child.”
Tyler lets out a loud laugh. “We really were made for each other.”
A smile cracks from hearing his words, and I roll over in his arms, so I can gaze upon his gorgeous face. I place my hand on his jaw and look into his dark eyes. “I don’t know what I’d do without you, Tyler.” Slowly, I lean in, pressing my mouth to his.
He kisses me gently and slowly, never taking—only giving. He pulls away and presses his lips to my forehead while his hands tangle in my hair, pulling my head against his chest. “I love you, Amy. You don’t even know what you mean to me,” he whispers into my hair.
His body heat, his words, and his strong arms making me feel safe…it’s all so relaxing. I can’t help but close my eyes and revel in this moment. As my body warms, my heart and breathing slow, melting with the relaxation that’s taking over my body. Before I know it, I’m fast asleep.
“Amy,” Tyler coos softly in my ear.
“Hmm?” I mumble, still sleep-dazed as I roll over to find him sitting on the edge of the bed, looking down at me with a smile.
“I have a surprise for you. Come on, get up!” He stands and pulls the blanket down my body.
I sit up and he takes my hand, pulling me to my feet and out of the room. The sun is going down now, painting the sky with pinks and purples.
“Where are we going?” I ask when he directs me out the screen door and over to his truck.
He opens the passenger side door with a grin. “It’s a surprise.”
I climb up and take my seat, watching as he closes my door and jogs around the front of the truck to his place beside me. With a twist of the key, the motor turns over and he shifts into drive.
Instead of heading back toward the front of the property, he drives in deeper, down a trail with massive green trees on each side. The further into the forest we get, the darker it becomes, until I see a big clearing up ahead. It’s like the trees open as he pulls the truck to a stop.
“We’re here,” he says, turning off the truck and swinging open his door.
“Here where?” I ask, hesitantly opening my door.
He meets me at the front of the truck and takes my hand, pulling me through the clearing.
“Close your eyes,” he whispers, stepping up behind me and covering my eyes.
I place my hands on his wrists, needing him for balance as I walk across the uneven earth.
He walks me a few steps forward before he whispers in my ear. “Open your eyes.” He removes his hands.
When I open my eyes, I find that we’re on an embankment. The sun is shining down between the trees, making the stream before me shine like a million diamonds. I turn to look at him, and that’s when I see the red-and-white checkered blanket on the ground, held down by a wicker basket.
“I knew how stressed and upset you were. And I thought that getting away from people and surrounding myself with nature always seems to clear my head.” He smiles and shrugs. “I hope you weren’t expecting something better.” He pulls his eyes from mine while rubbing the back of his neck.
I throw myself into his arms. “I love it! This is perfect.” I press my lips against his. “Thank you,” I whisper against them.
“You’re welcome,” he says, pulling away as he places me on my feet.
He takes my hand and pulls me over to the blanket where we both have a seat. Tyler opens the basket and begins pulling things out. First, a bottle of wine, which he opens then pours us both a glass. Without waiting, I take a big gulp, knowing I won’t be able to enjoy a glass of wine while taking a bubble bath now that my mom is home.
Next, he pulls out a platter filled with fruit, veggies, and cheese.
He laughs and shrugs. “Sorry I didn’t have time to prepare a whole meal. You were only asleep for an hour.”
“It’s perfect, Tyler.” I reach over and snag a grape, popping it into my mouth. “Thank you.”
He leans over and gives me a soft kiss.
He places the tray between us and we both lie back on our sides, facing one another.
“I know this is kind of cheesy, but this is my favorite spot. I love coming here just to listen to the water rippling, the trees blowing in the wind, and the animals scurrying nearby. It relaxes me—recharges me when I feel like life is moving too fast.” He looks over at me. “This is where I was when I decided that I did want to take thi
s step forward with you, and I couldn’t be happier that I did. I was hoping that it would aid in your decision about your mom.”
I take a sip of wine, then a deep breath. I listen to the water as it flows down the creek. I listen to the tree limbs blowing in the breeze, and I listen to my heart. This whole time, my heart has been telling me to move forward and repair this relationship. It’s my brain that’s been the problem.
“I think I know what I’m going to do.”
He looks over at me, dark eyes shining with the setting sun. “What?”
“I’m going to work on fixing things between us.” I shrug. “Like you said, if it doesn’t work out, then it won’t be from lack of trying.”
He smiles wide—a breathtaking smile that completely takes over his face and makes his eyes nearly glow—and he leans forward, capturing my mouth with his. This kiss is deep and slow, and it touches every nerve ending in my body. It speaks volumes.
I wrap my arms around his neck and pull him closer. He breaks the kiss and pushes the tray of food between us to the side, taking my wine glass and setting it on the grass with his. Then he rolls on top of me, maneuvering between my parted knees as his lips find mine once again.
I can feel him growing hard and pressing right where I need him to. I let out a whimper against his lips, and when I do, his hand squeezes my hip, pulling me closer. I reach for the hem of his shirt, and he allows me to pull it from his body.
“Will anyone be able to see us here?” I whisper, afraid that Dillon or even Liam may stumble upon us.
He shakes his head quickly as he lowers his chest back to mine. “Nobody comes out here.” As soon as the last word leaves his lips, his mouth conquers mine once again.
Before I know it, both of us are completely naked, lying on a blanket in the middle of the woods. The sky around us begins to darken, and the crickets start to chirp.
His teeth scrape my neck as he slides deep inside me, making me call out. His hands massage my breasts then move down to my hips, where he holds firmly, pulling me into his movements. He rocks his hips against mine, teasing that little spot inside of me that makes me see stars. But he won’t push me over the edge. Every time I get close, he pulls back, changing his movements.
“Tyler, please,” I beg softly, needing my release.
“Please what, Amy?” he says between his clenched teeth.
“I need to come.” My thighs squeeze his hips, trying to force him to give me what I need.
He lets out a chuckle. “If you want something from me, Amy, you’re going to have to take it.”
My eyes pop open and lock on his, taking his words as a challenge. I push against his chest, forcing him to roll over. Once his back is flat on the ground, I climb up his body, taking my place on top of him, lowering myself over his long, hard cock.
The second I slide down his length, he lets out a loud moan that nearly pushes me over the edge just from hearing it. It doesn’t take long with me on top until we’re both panting and moaning and shattering together.
Chapter 16
It’s going on nine p.m. when we pull back up at the cabin. I lean over and press a kiss to his lips. “I really should get going so I can have that talk with my mom.”
He takes my hand and presses a kiss to the top. “What do you say we all go out for breakfast in the morning? I’d really like to meet her.”
I smile. “I’d love that, but how about you just come to my place and I’ll cook? Seems more intimate.”
“I love that idea, too,” he says with a smile.
“I’ll see you in the morning then?”
“Absolutely.”
I climb out of the passenger side and he gets out, following me to my truck. I climb behind the wheel and he steps up to the open door, pulling me in for one last kiss.
“I love you, Amy,” he whispers against my lips.
“I love you too, Tyler,” I say before going back in for a little more.
When he pulls away, he shuts the door and takes a few steps back.
I start the truck and begin backing up, but when my lights illuminate his face, I can see the big smile he’s still wearing. It makes me smile myself. It’s unbelievable how much I’ve fallen for him these last few months. I knew when we were just hooking up that I could love him, and I wanted to love him. But I had no idea it’d be like this—feeling this weakening in the knees, being left breathless, and experiencing the tightening in my stomach every single time he touches me. It’s all so unbelievable.
When I pull back up to my apartment, the happiness I was feeling begins to wear off, and nervousness slips in. What if I walk in there only to find my reaction had caused her to start drinking again?
No, Ethan would never let that happen. But I guess she has every right to be mad at me after the way I acted. A little piece of me decides that if she can’t forgive me for my actions earlier, then I shouldn’t forgive her for the last twenty-something years. But then I push all that negative thinking away and focus on repairing the relationship with my mom.
I’m standing outside my door when I take a deep breath and push myself forward. She and Ethan are still sitting around the table, but there aren’t serious faces, tears, or a liquor bottle anywhere. Instead, the table in front of them is covered in old photo albums that I took from Mom’s place when she was evicted.
A smile covers my face even though I don’t want it to.
“Come over here, Amy. Look at this,” Mom says, waving me over.
I step inside and close the door behind me before stepping up behind her to see the picture she’s looking at. It’s an old picture of me. I was a baby and was taking a bubble bath. Based on my overly happy, excited expression, it must have been my first, and I loved it.
I laugh so hard I snort. “Look how wide my eyes are!” I laugh out.
“You think that’s bad?” He flips a few pages back and shows me a picture of me with a chocolate ice cream cone. The ice cream is smeared all over my face, hands, belly, and legs. I was so occupied by the ice cream that I wasn't even looking at the camera.
We all three laugh.
“It seems like a lifetime ago,” Mom says, flipping to the next page.
I take a seat with them at the kitchen table and look over the pictures as she flips pages. My eyes go from the album, to Ethan, and then to Mom, watching their expressions change with every page flip. Ethan smiles as he remembers things from the pictures, but Mom’s eyes begin tearing up.
“What’s wrong, Mom?” I ask, placing my hand on her shoulder.
She tears her eyes away from the pages and wipes the tears now streaming down her face. She shakes her head and clears her throat, as her voice grows thick with emotion. “I just missed so much.”
“What are you talking about? You’re in all these pictures,” I point out.
“These, yes. But the rest of your lives, nothing. There’s not even a picture of you in middle school, Amy.” She pushes away from the table, starting to pace. “I can’t believe I screwed everything up this badly. I can’t believe how selfish I’ve been. I robbed you both of childhoods. That’s something you only get once, and I took it.” Tears flow hot and heavy down her flushed cheeks.
I look at Ethan and he looks at me. I’m not sure what to do. I know I need to do something—pull her away from the slippery edge she’s standing on—because one little slip can cause her to fall over and back into a bottle. But on the other hand, I can’t exactly say that’s it’s okay either. She did steal our childhoods.
I stand and walk up to her, pulling her in for a hug. “Mom, I don’t know how to do this. I don’t want you to feel bad about the past. There’s nothing we can do to change it now. We can only work together to make a better future.”
She pulls back enough to study my face. “You mean, you forgive me?”
I take a deep breath. “I’m trying. Is that good enough for now?”
She offers a weak smile. “It’s a start.” She pulls me back against her one last time.
“See how well this is going, Mom?” Ethan says, walking up to us. “All you have to do is talk to us, and we’ll work it out. We have to. We’re all each other has.” He hugs us both in one big group hug.
I smile and nod. “That’s right, Mom. If you ever feel the tug of your past again, please come to us; don’t slide back down to where you were. We love you in spite of your mistakes.”
She cries and nods her head. “My therapist warned me about this—that I’d finally feel all the pain I’d been causing all these years. I’m prepared for it. Don’t worry, I’m not reaching for the bottle. I promise you both: that woman you’ve been taking care of all these years is gone.” She smiles proudly. “It’s just me now. I hope that’s okay?”
“It absolutely is,” Ethan says.
A little while later, Ethan grabs his coat to head down to his apartment. “Mom, do you want to stay here or come back to my place?”
She darts glances at both of us. “It’s up to you two. I don’t want to be a burden.”
“Tyler is going to come over in the morning, so we can all have breakfast together. He’s really looking forward to meeting you, Mom.”
She smiles. “That’s wonderful. Why haven’t I heard anything about him? Have you two been together long?”
I nod. “A few months, actually.” I stand and place my coffee cup in the sink. “But tomorrow evening, I’ll be heading over to the ranch to house-sit for the next month. So you’ll have this place all to yourself. I thought it might help you feel like you’ve gotten a little bit of your independence back.”
“Amy, when does your coffee shop open?” Mom asks.
I smile wide, nearly bouncing with excitement. “This Saturday! I’m so excited and nervous, I can’t even sleep.”
“I’m so proud of you.”
“We both are,” Ethan speaks up.
“Oh…Mom!” I shout after her as she heads toward the living room.
She turns around.
“I was thinking that if you wanted to, I could hire you part time at the coffee shop. It’d give you a little money, but it would also give you time to go to your AA meetings. What do you think?”
Claimed By Him: (Contemporary Romance Box Set) Page 25