“We’re a bit jet-lagged. Maybe in a few days.”
“Sounds good.”
Erik pulled up outside of my apartment. It was small but homey. I didn’t have any money. I came from nothing. Anxiety consumed me.
It didn’t matter how hard I was falling for Giselle; she was way out of my league.
Chapter 19
Giselle
THE NEXT MORNING, I WOKE UP exceptionally early due to the time change. I snuck out of bed before Ryan was awake. I wanted to make him breakfast, but his refrigerator was bare, which made sense because he had just returned from a vacation. Instead, I brewed some coffee and snooped around his place.
He had a few pictures up, one at his Navy SEAL graduation, and another with his friends.
But he had no pictures at all of his family.
Nor had he ever talked about them.
Why was he so secretive? I had no idea who this man I was spending so much time with was. Nothing about his background, his parents, his siblings. What was his story?
A few minutes later, Ryan emerged from the bedroom wearing nothing but pajama bottoms.
My eyes bugged. He was so gorgeous; I couldn’t handle it. He could be a movie star.
“Morning, babe. Sorry, I don’t have any food here. Let me take you to breakfast. Did you decide what you wanted to do today?”
You. But that wasn’t in the cards for me. Ryan had made it very clear that he didn’t want to have sex with me. Well, he did, but he wouldn’t. He was still pissed off about Miguel’s “break her in” comment. So was I.
Did I have to sleep with Miguel? Maybe we could just agree to a sexless marriage. When we wanted to have children, we could use artificial insemination.
Just considering those awful thoughts made me nauseous. How could I go through with this? How could I never see Ryan again?
I shook Miguel out of my head. “I wish to go to the zoo. It’s supposed to be one of the best in the world.”
“It is. Actually, I’ve never been.”
“Really? How is that possible? You live here.”
“I never had anyone to take. And I don’t have much free time. I’m always training or deployed.”
Right. Ryan was a workaholic. Then again, so was I. I was always going to a charity event, a state affair, or a fundraiser. It was rewarding work, but sometimes, I craved a simpler life.
Every year, when I went to our summer cottage, I had the most splendid time. I spent my days tending to the vegetable garden and my nights reading books by the hearth. I learned to cook many dishes. Nowhere to go, no one to see. Just peace and happiness.
I wish I could take Ryan there.
“Well, I can’t wait to explore the zoo with you.”
“Zoo it is. I’m going to hop in the shower.”
He didn’t ask me to join him. I wanted to but didn’t. When Ryan was done, I took my own shower and then got dressed.
We had a quick breakfast at a local café and headed off to the zoo.
When Ryan handed me a map of the zoo before we started, I knew I had underestimated my shoe choice. There was no way we’d get through the whole thing in one day. I had never seen anything like this. The animals were kept in huge enclosures with ample land. Koalas were my favorite animal, so we started there.
The koalas clung to their trees, eating their eucalyptus leaves.
I clasped my hands to my chest. “Aren’t they adorable? I love them. Australia is lovely.”
“Really? I’ve always wanted to go.”
I resisted the urge to suggest again we could go somewhere together. Instead, he kissed me right in front of the koalas.
Click.
My head jerked back. Some lady was taking a picture of us with her phone.
“Sorry to startle you! You both just looked so happy, so I thought I’d take a picture. Here I can airdrop it to you.”
Ryan smiled. “Sure. Thanks.”
Ryan held his phone up to hers, and, magically, the pictures appeared.
I stared at the photo, and something struck me.
I had never seen myself look so happy in my life.
Ugh. Would I ever be this happy again?
We strolled through the rest of the zoo. The hippos and the gorillas were other favorites of mine.
After a long walk, we finally stopped at the food court to get a snack.
In front of me, a young couple gave their toddler daughter an ice cream cone. The father looked so caring . . . just like Ryan.
My heart ached. I felt like I was facing an oncoming train and was powerless to stop it.
“What’s wrong, Princess?”
“It’s just . . . I want that.” I pointed to the couple.
“An ice cream cone? Chocolate or vanilla?”
Ryan could definitely be clueless sometimes. But it was adorable.
“No, that. A family.”
Ryan scowled. “Well, I’m sure you and Miguel will have beautiful children.”
“Stop, Ryan. I know. You’ve already told me over and over what an idiot I am. My marriage will be loveless. Miguel is a jerk. I’ll regret it. Don’t marry him. Stop. I’m not going to change my mind.”
“You’re right. I won’t waste my breath. Nothing I say changes anything. You’re going to do what you’re going to do, no matter what I say.” He stared at the family and then turned his head. “I’m ready to bounce.”
“Okay.”
We left the zoo, and my dreams of a happy little family, behind.
Chapter 20
Ryan
THE NEXT DAY, I TOOK GISELLE FOR a tour of the base. I was so proud to show her off but embarrassed that she wasn’t mine.
She was engaged to another man.
But Giselle was as charming as always, and the fact that she was a real-life princess fascinated all the SEALs.
We had brunch at the Del, and then she shopped at a few boutiques. I dutifully carried her bags. Man, who was I?
We finally left and went back to my place. The second we were inside, Giselle wrapped her hands around my neck and kissed me. I ripped off her dress, and she stood in front of me wearing nothing but a lace bra and matching panties.
God, I wanted to fuck her. And she kept asking me too. Why was I holding back?
I was about to pick her up and carry her to the bedroom when she flipped the script.
She knelt in front of me, tugging on my belt buckle.
“Babe, you don’t have to.”
She nodded. “I know, Ryan. I want to. I want to please you. Please, let me.”
This woman, this princess, was begging to suck my cock. Why was I hesitating?
Time to give in to my desires.
“Only if you ask me.”
She bit her lip. She was definitely not used to dirty talk.
“I just did.”
“Tell me what you want to do. I want to hear you say it.”
She exhaled, her voice low and sweet. “I want to suck your cock.”
Ah. Hearing this good girl, this virgin princess, say “cock” alone was almost enough to send me over the edge.
She undid off my belt buckle, my shorts fell to the ground, and she pulled down my underwear.
Her blue eyes looked up at me.
“Ryan, you are huge.”
God, I loved this girl. “Say that again.”
“No, seriously. What should I do? Sorry, I’m super sheltered.”
“Don’t apologize. I love that you’ve never done this before.”
“Really?”
“Yes, really. Grab me, baby. Rub your hands up and down over it.”
She obediently did as I asked. Her delicate hand felt so soft against my cock.
“Like this?”
“Just like that, baby. Now, put me in your mouth.”
Her eyes widened, and those beautiful lips of hers opened. The anticipation was killing me. Ever since I met her, I’d been so sexually frustrated, but I’d put my desires aside. I never wanted to pressure her at a
ll.
She planted a kiss on my tip as my cock grew harder in her hands.
“Don’t be shy. Suck it, Princess.”
She didn’t hesitate and took me completely in her mouth.
Her warm tongue felt heavenly. As her head bobbed up and down on my cock, I gave myself over to pure bliss.
“That’s it, baby. Don’t stop.”
My breath became labored. I ran my fingers through her hair, guiding her rhythm. One more look down at this beautiful woman pleasing me threatened to send me over the edge.
I pulled her off of me. “I’m going to come.”
She took me back in her mouth. Hell, I warned her.
She sucked me tightly, and pleasure ripped through me. I exploded into her mouth. I was certain she was going to run to the bathroom and spit, but she swallowed instead.
Damn.
I put on my underwear and then sat beside her, stroking her hair.
“I hope that was okay. I didn’t really know what I was doing.”
Her innocence broke me. “It was perfect. Giselle, you are perfect.”
Chapter 21
Giselle
I TOOK ANOTHER GLANCE IN THE mirror. I was so nervous about going to Erik’s house. I had already met him, and he seemed lovely, but I was eager to meet his wife, Aria. I had read everything about her online. She was an Olympic gold medalist in synchronized swimming, one of my favorite sports, and she was the first female Navy SEAL. I was so impressed by her.
We pulled up to a glorious mansion on Ocean Avenue. I couldn’t help but notice that there was a for-sale sign a few houses down. I didn’t dare inquire about the price because I didn’t want Ryan to feel uncomfortable with my wealth. Besides, what was I going to do with a home in Coronado? Stare out the window at Ryan running past me on the beach while I wept?
Aria opened the door and immediately embraced me. “Princess Giselle, it’s so lovely to meet you.”
I presented her with a bouquet of flowers. “Likewise, Aria. Thank you for having us.”
Erik handed Ryan a beer.
Ryan touched my arm. “Babe, I’m going to go help Erik barbecue. You good?”
“Yup. I’m great.”
He kissed me on the cheek.
Aria’s dog sniffed my toes.
“Flounder! Stop. I apologize for him. He’s a beagle which is pretty much a nose with a dog attached.”
“Oh, no worries at all. I love dogs. I have a King Charles Spaniel myself.”
She smiled. “Can I offer you a drink? Wine? Lemonade?”
“I’ll have the lemonade. Thank you.”
She led me into the gorgeous kitchen. It was so light and bright. Miguel wanted to live in the palace, but I would prefer something simpler.
“So, is this your first time in San Diego?”
“Yes. I love it here.”
“Yeah, you can’t beat Coronado. Though I hear you have fabulous beaches in your country.”
“I do.” I paused. She had obviously researched my country. She must know about my engagement. “You must think I’m so awful, coming here with Ryan. I’m sure you know that I’m engaged.”
She poured me a glass of lemonade, added a spring of lavender, and then stirred it before handing it to me.
“Of course, I don’t think you’re awful. I can’t even imagine what it’s like to be a royal. I’m sure you have responsibilities and commitments that I can’t even begin to understand.”
“I do. Don’t get me wrong. I love my life. But my duty comes first. This is the first time I have traveled alone. Ever.”
She nodded. “I don’t want to make you feel bad, but Erik has mentioned to me that he has never seen Ryan like this. He’s crazy about you. He never dates. Like ever.”
Guilt ate me up inside. “I know. He’s told me. I’m crazy about him too. I wish I was free to love him, but I’m not.”
I gazed out at the ocean. I wanted so badly to break away, be free, live my life by my rules, but I just couldn’t. The invites were sent, the wedding was planned, how could I bring such shame to my country?
Aria placed her hand on mine.
“I get it, I do. But secrets will eat you up. And you deserve to be happy. I really hope everything works out for you.”
“I appreciate that.”
Erik called us for dinner. We dined in the backyard. Two couples just talking about life and sharing laughter. I had nothing like this back home. My cousin was more of a party girl. My friends from university were busy with their own lives. I craved to be part of a real group of tight-knit friends.
But genuine friendship and true love were two luxuries I couldn’t afford.
Chapter 22
Ryan
GISELLE INSISTED ON COOKING dinner. We went to a local fish market, and she picked out all the ingredients, making an incredible salmon dish with asparagus and potatoes. I was impressed that she could cook, but Giselle was full of surprises.
After dinner, we relaxed and had a glass of wine. It felt good to be alone with her in my place. Like a normal couple.
I was getting used to having her around.
She placed her hand on my thigh. “Can I ask you a question?”
“Shoot.”
“Tell me about your family.”
Anything but that.
“Why?”
“Because I’m curious.”
“But why does it matter?”
“Because Ryan, this is what people do. Talk. Express themselves. It’s not healthy to keep your life bottled up inside.”
My internal shield popped up as if I was going to war. I inhaled and exhaled slowly, allowing my SEAL training to take over and counteract the heat in my chest. “Why? Why should I tell you? You aren’t going to be there for me. You aren’t my girlfriend. You won’t be with me at the dock when I deploy or greeting me when I return. Why should I tell you anything?”
She bit her lower lip. “Because I care. I’m sorry my life is the way it is. But I still care about you. I will always care about you. Let me in.”
Fuck. What did I have to lose?
Oh yeah, my heart.
Maybe it would help me to share. I had never told a soul about my past. Not even my Teammates.
I took a deep breath, willing my hands not to shake.
“Fine, Giselle. My mom was a crack addict. Fucked so many men that she didn’t even know who my father was. I don’t even know who my father is. I’m a fucking bastard. She overdosed, and then CPS took me in. I was in the system my entire life. No one wants to adopt a little boy who’s a troublemaker. So, I got passed around to foster home after foster home. And I was abused. Daily. I watched my foster sister get raped. I tried to save her, but my foster dad beat the shit out of me.”
The second the words left my mouth, I instantly regretted them.
Giselle clasped her hands over her heart and looked at me with a combination of pity and horror. She would never see me the same way again. As her hero. I was beneath her. Definitely not suitable to date royalty.
She reached out to me, but I pulled away. “Ryan, I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have asked.”
“Yeah, you shouldn’t have. Look, I’m going to call it a night.” I went to my room and closed the door. Fuck. I was being a jerk. She was just trying to get close to me, but I couldn’t help myself.
Why had I let her in?
After my foster dad burned his cigarette into my neck, I vowed to be the biggest, baddest motherfucker in the world so no one would hurt me again.
But I hadn’t succeeded. Because someone was about to hurt me.
And that person wasn’t a motherfucker the size of a pickup truck.
That person was a beautiful princess.
Chapter 23
Giselle
I CLIMBED INTO RYAN’S BED LATER that night, but he was fast asleep. The next morning, we didn’t talk about his past. It was so horrifying; I didn’t want to pry. I regretted asking him to open up, especially because he was right. No matter what,
I was going to leave.
We spent the day lounging on the beach. Ryan even taught me how to surf. I’d always been so scared to learn, but with Ryan by my side, nothing seemed impossible.
Back at his place, I relaxed on Ryan’s sofa. He turned on Netflix, grabbed a beer for himself, poured me a glass of Chardonnay, and put his arm around me.
I glanced around his small apartment. The coffee table was spotless, and he even had some cozy throws on the back of the couch. I closed my eyes—what it would be like to live with him. Could I get used to the simple life that I’d always proclaimed to crave, or would I miss my royal world? I guessed I would never find out. There was no way I was going to abandon my country and my family. Not even for Ryan.
Especially not for Ryan, a man who’d told me repeatedly that he never wanted to get married or start a family.
Ever.
What kind of future could we possibly have together? He would probably tire of me when the challenge wore off.
Ryan flipped through shows, and I couldn’t stop staring at him. He was perfection. His arms were muscular, his profile was distinguished, and he had an adorable grin that could seduce a nun.
A nun, but not a princess.
“What are you in the mood for? There’s supposed to be this great documentary about World War II. You game?”
I pursed my lips and forced myself to answer him. I was constantly impressed that he binged history, not reality television. My long-held stereotypes of Americans’ viewing habits didn’t hold true—at least not when it came to Ryan. “Sure.”
The truth was, it didn’t matter what we watched, because I simply couldn’t focus at all.
My mind was focused on only one thing.
Him.
We had only a couple days left together. A couple days before I flew back home to Santa Cariña.
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