by S. K Munt
Looking pale, puffy and very unhappy, Kohén turned to me and whispered that he would try to get back and see me before it was time for me to make my own entrance, but that he couldn’t be certain that he’d make it, and if that was the case then I wasn’t to leave the harem under any circumstances unless it was on his arm. I baulked at that, but he reminded me that because I was his and not his father’s, I was allowed to refuse to leave with anyone else and could not be forced to do otherwise so I should lock my door behind me if anyone tried, and I nodded eagerly. He then told me that he loved me, promised that our life together would truly start again after midnight and then closed the door behind him- but not before warning Dulcie that I was not to be given any grief, or made up to look ridiculous, and she agreed with a nod and a slam of the door. Then she wheeled my little IV stand out into the main room and over to one of the waxing beds, and I had no choice to follow.
‘Thank God, he’s gone at last!’ she exclaimed as she began to tear around the spa, flicking on switches for things, and I swallowed and lay down on the bed while she explained that my healer was still a ways off so we had a bit of time to kill before I had to start getting ready, which was a relief. Besides, she said that she didn’t have my dress yet- apparently she had to measure me so a seamstress could take in the gown that had been brought to the castle for me, and she clucked her tongue about the difficulty of choosing a nail or make-up colour palette without seeing the dress first, and lamented all of the things that could go wrong as far as hair styling and make up was concerned when she didn’t even know what kind of mask I was going to be wearing.
I asked her if she knew if my gown had come from a dressmaker in Janiel- because I had a vague recollection of Lindy mentioning that Karol had asked her to sew me one over a year ago- but she asked how was she supposed to know such things? She hadn’t had a single shift in the harem since I’d been brought in and most of the others kicked out, and as far as she knew I ought to have been wearing only a golden toga and a mask if I was expected to go on Kohén’s arm.
‘Actually that’s a good idea,’ she said as she traded out my almost empty IV bag for a new one, ‘I should be safe if I paint your toes and fingers gold, right? That is the Arcadian colour after all!’ I’d done a cross between a nod and a shrug and she’d clucked her tongue some more before telling me to sleep while I could because that was what she was going to do in the other room until the healer arrived. Then she left me alone in that cold space, staring at the wall and feeling sick over the thought of donning a golden toga. It wouldn’t draw unwanted attention to me the way that the swan dress had, but it would draw unwanted attention to the fact that I was an official whore now, and if that Lindy had made me a special dress, it would be locked away in my closet until Kohén decided to attend an occasion without me- an event I could only dread.
He promised he wouldn’t… I thought, curling up to my side and feeling grateful for the fact that all of the mirrors were at the other end of the room in front of the hairdressing stations, not here near the beds. If he got out of having to escort someone tonight, he’ll be able to do it next time, right? And the time after that, and the time after that… until he’s too old to marry and no one cares anymore… right?
It sounded like he most foolish hope I’d ever had to my sober sub-conscious, but I closed my eyes and tried to let the hope take me over, knowing that the truly foolish thing for me to do would be to stop hoping and wishing and dreaming- knowing that Kohén and I would never amount to anything more than master and slave if I didn’t make the effort to believe that more was possible, as fervently as he always had.
*
I fell asleep again and when I awoke, it was because a sleepy-looking Dulcie was yawning and showing someone in. I was shocked to find myself regarding a male healer with skin as dark and luminous as black pearls, and long, straight onyx hair that fell to his hips in a thin curtain. He was as comely looking as he was unsettling, and when he fixed his lilac eyes on mine, the breath rushed out of me.
‘Well, this is a first,’ he said in an elegant accent, lifting my face and assessing my eyes with a critical air. ‘Do you wear contacts, child?’ I shook my head to say no, but he pulled back abruptly and blinked, turning to Dulcie: ‘See how the hue just shifted! That’s extraordinary!’
‘Yours don’t?’ I asked quietly, and he shook his head.
‘No they are the same all the time. What causes the shift in yours? Light?’
‘I’m told emotion.’
The healer smiled benevolently. ‘Yes I can sense you have plenty of that.’ He took my hand and examined it while a radiant heat passed through his skin and into mine. ‘Power too, despite all of these bumps and bruises and…’ he winced as he touched my face gently, ‘the black eye... you’re not the descendant of one like us?’
I shook my head, even though my insides curdled a bit at the thought of my father. ‘No,’ I said softly. ‘We can trace back my family tree a long way, and there is absolutely no connection to a Nephilim on either side.’ Unless you count the golden man that my mother had sex with because she though she was with a woman!
‘I don’t know if I believe that,’ the healer stroked a fingertip down one of my veins, and I watched as it reddened and swelled under my skin, fascinated. ‘But it’s probably better for you if I leave the matter alone, hmm?’ he winked at me and then smiled, shaking his head. ‘Truly extraordinary eyes. The hair, the skin…I don’t even see any pores here!’ he turned to Dulcie again. ‘How much of this is your doing? It’s incredible work even if she has gotten a bit wrecked over the past few days.’ He picked up my lank, greasy hair and frowned at the ends. ‘Ugh, split!’
‘I can’t claim credit for any of it,’ Dulcie said woodenly. ‘The only enhancement she’s ever had have been skin deep, and all of the damage is someone else’s doing too.’
‘No!’ the Nephilim cocked his head at me. ‘Lucky girl! Were I attracted to women…’
‘She’s very beautiful…’ Dulcie said, somewhat reluctantly. ‘But I don’t know if ‘lucky’ is the correct adjective to use when describing her. I daresay it’s those striking eyes that got her into this predicament to start with.’
‘And what predicament are you speaking of?’
I looked at Dulcie sharply, and she rolled her eyes and sighed. ‘Love... she claims,’ she turned away and began to pull out her hair so that she could gather it all up into a ponytail again. ‘But unfortunately for her, she is not the first girl to make such a claim in here, and would be the first to have it work out well for her in the end.’
The healer clucked his tongue. ‘Don’t frighten the girl. She has miles to go, and will need to be brave, not terrified.’ He smiled at me, teeth glaringly bright against his dark skin. ‘Are you looking forward to tonight, Liberty? I am. In fact, I’ve come all the way from Rachiel to meet the girl that’s inspired such a rebellion…‘’
I barely heard him, for I’d craned forward to see Dulcie. ‘Someone else has fallen in love with a prince before?’ and Dulcie laughed, turning back to me. She spoke oddly for she was holding a pin between her lips, but I was able to make out her words.
‘Don’t you all?’
I shrank back. ‘Well… no. I- I don’t believe any of the other girls care for Kohén so…’
‘Well I’m sorry I over-exaggerated, I’m sure. What I meant to say was that in every generation of Companions that comes through here, at least two out of the bunch fall madly in love with their host, and one or two others tend to believe that they have.’ She shrugged. ‘I will admit, the Barachiel princes have always taken pains to keep the lines between love and companionship clear and Kohén is the first that I’ve seen re-draw the lines all over the place… but he’s not the only one that has.’
My heart was pounding again, and the Nephilim stroking my arms frowned, giving me the silent command to relax. ‘Who was the other?’ I asked quickly. ‘Tell me, please?’
‘Such stories are sixty perce
nt gossip and as this is an old one, I’m sure it is more fictional than factual. Besides, those secrets aren’t allowed to leave the harem, remember?’
‘A courtesy that no one’s bestowed upon me,‘ I pointed out, ‘and look around you- we’re in the harem still, so tell me a story! Let me decide what I believe is fact, and what I believe is fictional. What became of her?’
‘She was deported to Asiana,’ Dulcie said flatly. I inhaled sharply and Dulcie sighed, her eyes softening as she walked back to me. ‘Mind you, that wasn’t her master’s wish. Word had it that she was quite the seductress and had more than one man under her spell, and when the king found out that she’d wrapped the prince around her finger but was also seducing others, well…’
My mouth dropped open. ‘Wait… what? She was unfaithful to the prince and all she got was deported for it?’ I shook my head amazed and a little relieved. I’d been so scared over my dalliance with Kohl! And really, all I could have gotten for it was a relocation! That wasn’t so bad, was it?
‘Well I’m certain had she been your age she would have gotten a lot worse… problem is, she was only just turning fourteen at the time so she was punished as a child would be-’
‘FOURTEEN?’ I was beyond shocked. ‘The prince was consorting with a girl that was underage?’
‘No, he was merely in love with her.’ Dulcie lifted her eyebrows. ‘It was the two other males that were doing the consorting, apparently, and both would have paid very dearly for it only one escaped, leaving the other to take all of the fall.’
‘Sounds like a wonderful girl…’ my healer drawled. ‘So cunning, so young! The prince really missed out with her, didn’t he?’
‘The prince was devastated- and never took another lover again,’ Dulcie said, and my jaw dropped further. She had to be talking about King Raoul! The only prince to have never married! ‘So the laws in the harem have been stricter since. In fact, I believe that was then you all had to start wearing uniforms. Before then, things were a bit more relaxed.’
‘That’s not fair is it? To punish generations of girls for one girl’s mistake?’
‘No, but the fallout after it was awful so I can understand why pains were taken to make sure it never happened again. My grandmother held my position within Eden at the time,’ Dulcie said, ‘she said she was the sweetest girl you’d ever met- but I don’t know… I think she knew what she was doing.’
My mind was racing despite the healer’s best attempts to soothe me with his touches. I’d only ever heard of one underage girl cheating on her prince before, and that was the same underage girl that had been impregnated by Bastien Birch. Was it possible that the two stories were the same story?
‘Shepherd Birch?’ I asked, and Dulcie expelled a splattering cough before regarding me with wide eyes. ‘Was this girl found out because she was impregnated by Bastien Birch?’
‘You’ve heard that story?’
‘There’s a whole book about it!’ I said, sitting up again. ‘I’ve read it in the past month. Only I never knew the name of the prince at the time because the monarchs were just referred to as ‘the prince’ and ‘the king’ and I didn’t know the prince had loved her! Wait, so there was more than one man that could have fathered her child? And he got away?’
Dulcie nodded. ‘The other male she was dallying with was only thirteen too- a castle staff member’s son, and likely not old enough to procreate. Bastien swore that he’d never touched the girl and tried to point fingers at the young boy to get himself off the hook, but the girl was interrogated separately and she rushed to Bastien’s defence, swearing that he hadn’t taken advantage of her- she’d loved him and she didn’t regret what they’d done together because unlike the prince, Shep Birch had been a good, pious man that wanted girls like her to be free to know love as they had.’ Dulcie clucked her tongue. ‘Well that did it, didn’t it? You have one of the accused trying to shift the blame, unaware of the fact that his partner in crime was begging for his forgiveness and a pardon… it made it pretty clear who was dishonest to the core. Add to the fact that Shepherd Birch had been using her as the soapbox he stood upon while preaching that the Given Girls ought to be released, and you had motive too. So it’s understood that though she and the other young boy fooled around at some point, it was likely only Bastien got to know her in the biblical sense.’
‘God,’ I whispered. ‘So much was omitted from the biography!’
‘That happens often,’ Dulcie said, and I thought about the first draft of the family tree that Satan had given me. Had that been fact, or fiction? Oh I hated the not knowing! ‘The mother of the boy that Shep had accused immediately high-tailed it out of Arcadia when she found out that her son was likely to get banished anyway, for having had an innocent crush on a girl that had had been less innocent due to her grooming- and children of castle staff have been forbidden from associating with the Given Girls or the crowned princes since.’ She nodded at me. ‘And I suppose that you are the product of that- you and Kohén both. You are forced to grow up as friends now, and that fosters a bond that will prevent the prince from getting hurt, but one that offers almost no protection to the Companion. I see that he loves you, girl, or believes that he does… but do not be surprised if one day you end up the subject of a cautionary-tale that is passed off as biography when it is really a mostly fictional recount of events that have been distorted by time.’
‘I won’t be surprised,’ I said quietly to Dulcie. ‘Why do you think I’ve been drinking so this past week? I know you think that I’m stupid Dulcie, and in some ways you are right… I was drunk and scared and confused when I gave my virginity to my Barachiel prince, and I was not thinking with my head, that’s for sure- only my heart.’ I sighed, feeling sleepy and relaxed because my healer had moved to the other side of my bed and was now treating the right side of my body. ‘But I gave it away willingly, and I won’t tolerate people saying otherwise. I have regretted what I did with every second beat of my heart this week, yes. I have raged against him for not stopping me, and I have raged against myself for my stupidity… but that does not change the fact that every other beat of my heart is for him.’ I watched as bruises vanished beneath the healer’s touch and relaxed more as the tension drained out of my limbs. He plucked the cannula out next and though it hurt a little, he immediately depressed his thumb to the lump on the back of my hand and when he moved it away, it was as though nothing had ever pierced my skin. I didn’t know what specific ‘ailment’ he was curing, but my nervous system was being numbed, that was for sure, and it made speaking my mind easier than it had been all week. ‘Kohén wants me to believe that it will work out favourably for us and that makes him stupid too, but I am playing along now because let’s face it… if you were in my position, would you want to be smart and aware of how badly your life is going to go for you?’ I looked at Dulcie, who was hanging onto my every word while watching the healer trace the handprint over my heart with a glowing fingertip. ‘Or drunk, foolish and in love?’
There was a long silence after I’d finished speaking and eventually, Dulcie sighed and said: ‘I’d suppose I’d want a long shower, a massage, and the chance to stand my foolish ground on the behalf of the man I loved to my own detriment.’
I smiled at her as the healer moved his hands to my face. They were warm and sweet-smelling and I closed my eyes gently. ‘Thank you,’ I said. And once again, I meant it.
*
As soon as I’d been healed, Dulcie asked me if I wanted to walk down to the mirror so I could see myself but I told her there was no point- the mirror in my chamber had been broken for days, so I didn’t know how bad I’d looked anyway to make a comparison now. Really I was just scared that Satan would make an appearance again, but I must have come off as ungrateful because Dulcie clucked her tongue as she led me into the small massage room, closing me in there with Heath, my healer, who proceeded to give me a deep tissue massage that hurt as much as it helped before lulling me off into another deep sleep. Once
that was done, he had Dulcie come in and smooth a rich-smelling mud mask in milky clay over my entire naked body and then she inserted another cannula into my arm and left me there to rest and take in more fluids while impurities were apparently drawn from my skin- alcohol, most likely because the longer it stayed on, the clearer my mind became and the more I hated it.
Where is the tracking device? Where is Kohén? It’s almost six! He should have come in by now to check on me, yes? Why did they omit so much from Shepherd Choir’s story? How old is Shep Choir if he was there all those decades ago to sort everything out? Where is the tracking device? What if Ora refuses Karol because she doesn’t want to be associated with his hated brother?
While I fretted, Dulcie went off to get us all a late lunch and Heath drew my bath using a variety of essential oils that were supposed to help keep me calm. He agreed after seeing to me that I had indeed been suffering from malnourishment, dehydration and anxiety, and that the two had culminated in giving me a panic attack that my body had been too weak to cope with, which had caused my heart to race and then falter. Apparently I would have to take an assortment of nutrients in the form of tablets for days before I attempted to eat a large meal, but before I had my bath I was brought back to sit on my bed while Heath fed me spoonful after spoonful of a cauliflower and truffle soup. I must have looked ridiculous- coated head to toe in white, cracking mud while still hooked up to my drip and wearing paper panties and Heath did smirk once or twice, but to his credit he kept his face as straight as one could while prompting me to open my mouth.
‘Miles to go…’ he said, giving me another secretive smile and I thought that he and Satan would get along well for their love of cryptic speech, ‘but how you’ll burn a path.’
I wanted to ask him for a translation but he slipped the silver spoon into my mouth then and I was distracted by it. The first mouthful made me feel queasy despite the fact that I’d been feeling wonderful (perhaps a little too wonderful- I was so drowsy and pliant!) but when Dulcie told me that the cauliflowers had come out of my gardens and would be the last for the year now that the weather was chilling quickly, I ate the next four or five mouthfuls with renewed enthusiasm. It was delicious and I wanted more after, but Dulcie took the rest of the bowl away from Heath and said I could have more once I’d finished my bath.