by S. K Munt
‘What?!’ I squeaked, grasping at the rock so that I wouldn’t tip over prematurely. ‘How?’
‘Satan put you in here on purpose!’ Martya declared, and my jaw dropped, filling with river-spray. ‘On the night that we learned of our Companion fate, I was furious! I looked in the mirror and saw that my pain and fear had manifested Satan! She told me that she’d asked my mother to break a rule by having me- to give my family a shot at making things right! She said we could all be free of this place and break the curse and that would steer humanity back on course, but only if I helped you either win Kohén’s heart, or got you out of here before you could be sucked into the system, like you’re determined to become sucked into this waterfall!’ She gripped the rocks, kneeling to look me in the eyes. ‘You were to be the woman that a Barachiel could love, Larkin! You were planted here for that purpose alone, and I planted near to you, to cultivate it! You were to be the one that broke the curse and changed it all, but that would not happen if you were made infertile, so when I saw that Karol was beginning to leer at you, and Kohén beginning to gaze at you with lust, I did all that I did in the hopes that it would force you to run from this place! Hoping that you would leave before you turned sixteen and went through that dreadful induction…’ she shuddered, and when she opened her eyes again, she looked desolate. ‘But not even my death could shake any sense into your well-meaning mind! That cure was your ticket out of here and you used it to make someone else’s world a better place instead of your own!’
‘I couldn’t help it!’ I wept, head swimming as my eyes were. ‘No one told me anything! I was raised to aspire to be good and kind and strong- not to manipulate myself into the position of becoming a queen!’
‘You would have been all of that and more if you’d had one selfish bone in your body!’ Martya cried. ‘Your goodness and light was supposed to be what earned you a Barachiel soul mate, while your awkward looks were intended to help conceal your appeal, but you bloomed too soon, so all it did was play you right into their greedy, grasping hands! Now look at you- considering ending your life over those smarmy bastards, who deserve all that Julieta cursed them with and more! Well I won’t stand for it! I did not give up my hopes and dreams and freedom to see my best friend plunge to her death, Larkin!’ She stood up again. ‘So fly over here now, okay? Fly over here, embrace me, and let me show you all that is waiting for you on the other side of this fence! Your father! Your friends! Anyone you wish to follow you will follow you, but you must take that leap first into my arms!’
I stared at her, aghast. ‘You’re asking for me to trust you?’ I demanded, incredulous. ‘You admit that you’re a dark Nephilim driven into my life by a curse, and then ask me to trust you? How do I know that you’re not really Satan right now, playing tricks with my mind?’
‘You can’t know that, only trust in your heart that I am telling the truth!’ Martya extended a hand to me. ‘There are no light or dark Nephilim, Larkin, only different coloured feathers, remember? I could be as light as you- as good and kind and selfless and sacrificing, everyone in the world could be! But only if you use what is left of your feathers to bridge the last gap between us and join The Sequestered! We will rise with you as our queen, and we will make the world a truly equal place at last! Satan has seen it!’
The Sequestered again? Is that who Constance was telling me to run to? What have they got to do with my life?!
I looked from Martya, to the woods behind her, then down at the white water and over to the rocks below. The river was narrow here, but even then, it was still at least ten metres wide. Did I have what it took to bridge that gap? I looked down at my feathers, and knew that I did not. ‘Satan has seen it?’ I asked quietly. ‘Me... as a queen?’
Martya nodded eagerly. ‘Why do you think so many people have amassed here tonight, Larkin? Why do you think they’ve been screaming for your release? Because we all know what you could do for humanity- she has been spreading the word, congregating us here to witness this glorious moment so that we will know to follow you as surely as the first residents of this place knew to follow Miguel! She has manipulated every moment of your existence to get you to this point, and over that infernal fence, so that you can lead the ones that slipped through the cracks, together! It could have come to pass by getting you on the Barachiel throne too, but they fucked it up and I am glad for it! The world has been making a saint of Miguel Barachiel for too long, to its detriment- well no more! It’s time to see what would happen if a woman were left in charge, and that woman is you, so jump for your life and let those who share your dreams catch you!’
My heart cramped up inside my chest, beating its last. ‘If Satan wanted me to have the strength to lead people, or to get over that fence… then she should have given me a darker heart, an uglier facade or stronger feathers- because as desperately as I want to live, Martya… for all of you…’ I sniffled and wiped at my last tears while I tried to shake off my ellipism, ‘I want to die more. Witness that, why don’t you? Witness me leap to you- and fall short of everyone’s expectations! Perhaps then, they will turn to you- a woman with an actual backbone- to lead the way!’
‘Larkin!’ I heard someone behind me call, and twisted around just in time to see a perfectly-healed Barachiel in a white toga stagger after me, grasping the fence and shaking it as he howled. Kohl. He had survived and had been healed, and if I’d needed further proof that I was done with this world, then the sight of him up and about while poor Karol remained dead somewhere clinched it for me. Thunder cracked above us and the skies opened so that ice-cold rain could pelt down on us- and at all of the people reaching for him. ‘Get back here, Larkin Whittaker, and answer for your crimes!’
Martya screamed as he did, but I moved quickly, only making it a few feet over the river’s edge before I flapped my wings- and felt the air rush through them. One moment I’d been bounding off the ground with all of the strength I had right towards Martya as she’d asked, and the next I was free-falling into the water below, which grasped me and sent me tumbling over the side, forcing rocks into my hips- snapping my bones immediately. My dear friend’s scream followed me for as far as it could before that violent white water swallowed me, sucking me into itself, and it was like being pounded by a thousand fists as I was hit with rocks, sticks and chunks of ice. Ice-cold water filled my ears, eyes, and mouth until I was choking on my own scream, and the world around me fuzzed and bubbled angrily as it thumped me downwards.
It’s ending! I thought, closing my eyes and letting the freezing water put the coals in my heart out for good. It’s finally ending! I’m sorry Martya, but I cannot live in this world and love without trust!
But suddenly I was spat out into more of a free-fall, which was as thrilling as it was terrifying, but just as I opened my eyes, gasped around the rush of adrenaline making my extremities tingle, said a silent prayer to God to forgive me for all I had done- especially to poor Karol- and mostly for being too weak to go on living, I saw the last thing I’d expected to see-
‘No!’ I spluttered, as I plummeted not into rocks, but the swiftest incoming tide in history. Not into Satan’s eternal hellfire, but into the ocean, which was as good as falling directly into Kohl’s own, hateful hands again as he manipulated it to work his will- and break mine anew. The rain had stopped, but only because Kohl had switched tactics, and had decided to cushion my fall by filling the cove beneath me with the tide.
Son of a-
I hit the water hard like a stone being dropped into a stream, but though I let my breath rush out of me in order to sink down quickly, begging the rocks below to rise from the earth so that they’d still shatter me, all my flailing arms and legs touched was water. Ferocious, heavy, mind-numbingly cold water that began to swirl as I reached the bottom, sucked me backwards- and then spat me back through the surface like flotsam, making me gasp. The sky was as dark as the water was, and I could not tell if I was still rising up, or falling back down until bubbles burst into my nose as a wave
crashed over me, pounding me down hard again.
‘No!’ I cried, but my mouth was already filling with water and I was vanishing under the surface, completely disorientated and terrified. I’d wanted to die, but not like this! Not as a result of Kohl’s control over anything, least of all my fate! I was spat out onto the surface again, and then I heard a roar and looked up in time to see a huge wave bearing down over me. I sobbed in fear and tried to duck dive beneath it so that I could avoid being caught up by the powerful surface movement and hurtled back to the shore, but it was a mystical wave forged with murderous intent and so I was not equipped to fight it, especially not with waterlogged wings and dread-filled limbs that were not cooperating.
Oh God, Kohl- how are you doing this? Large bodies of water are supposed to intimidate you, not accommodate you!
My feet were frantically pedalling but my heels were stabbing into my frothy, sodden skirts, getting caught until they tore free, and my hair was wrapping around my face and neck like angry serpents, keeping me blinded and therefore panicked. The wave caught me and flipped me and started to drive me towards the shore, and just as I caught the lighter hint of land and sand rushing forward to meet me, I felt a warm, familiar hand catch my leg and drag me back with twice the strength of the wave. I balled up and twisted, saw Satan glowering at me from behind and beneath like an anchor, and sobbed anew, churning out a cluster of bubbles from my nose. The wave passed over us and then she let go of my foot, took my wrist and then began to kick her legs, towing me behind her until we both thrust out of the water at once.
‘Is this what you wanted?’ Satan screamed over the groan and crashing of the wave that had just hit the shore while I used one hand to tug the band of my skirt over my hips so that it would slide away. ‘So many millions of people have opted for suicide over the years, wanting to add romance and drama to their death- wanting to set things up for themselves to be as easy and poetic as plausible! But you can not plot an idyllic death, Larkin, it is always ugly! It is the one thing that is an equaliser!’
‘You know this isn’t what I wanted!’ I spluttered as she hefted me over a large log that had been about to crash into us. It only just supported my weight, but I appreciated it all the same. ‘I wanted it over fast! I wanted it to happen somewhere beautiful, just so beauty on earth would be the last thing I saw!’ I scowled at her. ‘And I know this is your doing! The only healer powerful enough to have restored Kohl so swiftly is Karol, and he’s dead, so you must have master-minded his recovery, just as you apparently master-minded my entire life!’ I knew it was pointless but I scooped up an armful of water and sloshed it at her. ‘I hate you-’
Another wave smashed into us and I was picked up as easily as the log beneath me and shoved down through the surf again. I was in shallower waters this time so I hit the bottom hard, but all that crashed into me was cold, grainy sand. I rolled for I don’t know how long and tried to suck the water in- tried to drown myself- but it was too hard to do and before I knew it, someone had clutched me and dragged me back upwards again. I wanted to fight, but I was already exhausted.
‘Yes I did it!’ Satan screamed as I surfaced in the frigid night air again. ‘What can I say? It’s not every day that a descendant of Miguel’s cries out for my help, so I was moved to answer his prayers!’
‘What did he ask for?’ I choked on the words and salty water. ‘Me? More power?’
‘The chance to emerge from the harem with his reputation and his physical being unscathed!’ Satan retorted, and I gaped at her, thunderstruck. ‘So I healed him, on one condition!’
‘You got to keep his soul?’ I growled, despising her for granting him the ability to get away with all that he had done to hurt me.
‘No, that’s actually not the first thing I ask for Larkin, but the last,’ Satan’s eyes flashed with amusement. ‘I told him that he’d make it out of the harem alive, but only he saved his baby brother first!’ She shook her sodden hair. ‘He actually considered not doing it, can you believe it?’ Satan tittered as we rose and fell on a gentler wave. ‘But in the end vanity won out- it always does- so he put out the fire and pulled Kohén to safety, getting him to a healer in the nick of time.’
I felt like I’d been slapped. ‘But they must have been burning for twenty minutes by-’
‘Oh don’t be daft- this was done by the time you’d made it through the door, child. What do you think...I sat there listening to your re-cap of the evening’s events with that bloody bouncer when there were pristine hearts to capture just metres away?’
‘You’re so twisted!’ I cried, hating myself for being surprised to learn that Satan had double-crossed me. ‘You act like you want to help me, but you help the very people that have led me to this moment!’
‘I cleared two deaths off your conscience, and have now motivated you to stay alive- all things that prove that I am looking out for you!’ she argued. ‘And that is exactly what I’m doing. I’m offering you HELP. I am offering you the WORLD! But all you’re going to know from now is pain if you don’t take me up on those offers, Larkin! Perhaps you haven’t been caught alone on a dark beach while in a fragile state by a bunch of ravenous men, but I have, remember?’ She pointed to the shore, and my heart sank to see dozens of flaming torches working their way down the paths that had been cut into the hillside and to the scrawny, dark beach alone. ‘And that’s the fate that waits for you now, sweet Larkin! This tide will work to sweep you directly back into his clutches so that he can make a spectacle out of remanding you! He will have you bound, gagged, humiliated and dragged to that dungeon where he’ll be able to do unspeakable things to you and call it justice… is THAT WHAT YOU WANT?!’
‘No!’ I cried. ‘Of course it’s not!’
‘Then trust me, and swear yourself to me so I can get you out of this! I need that blessing Larkin I need your free will to love you as best as I am able, just like Karol did!’
‘But I can’t trust you now anymore than I could have trusted Karol ten minutes ago!’ I wept, feeling broken into pieces on the inside. ‘Didn’t you once say that exact same thing to God? In the book of creation he asked for your love, but thanks to the way he had ruined you- you could not give it!’ I choked on salty water and spat it out, coughing. ‘That is how I am with trust! I want to be able to give it, but I have none left!’
‘Find some, Larkin!’ Satan was crying now, her tears bloody and dark in the dim, smoky night. ‘Learn from my mistakes if nothing else and trust me!’ She twisted my weary body in the water and showed me the silvery wave looming up over us in the near distance. ‘Or see your distrust knock you hard into the arms of the man that has created it!’
I looked at the wave, then back to the beach, then back to Satan. ‘Wh-what’s the price?’ I asked weakly, sinking again because I had no strength left to paddle anymore. She caught me and jerked me up.
‘I want you to swear to do three things for me- you must do them all without hesitation or argument, and if you don’t…’ she glanced back at the beach, then back to me. ‘Then this is where you will end up again- right here, this moment, this night- that end.’
My teeth were chattering. ‘Th-that’s not fair,’ I whispered. ‘If you get three, I want three too!’
Her eyebrows shot up. ‘I am not a fucking genie I am Satan- and you are rubbing me the wrong way.’
I shrugged, kicking away from her. ‘Fine. Then rape it is-’
‘Fine! What are they?’ the ‘R’ word seemed to push a panic button in her eyes, and I found it unsettling to think that she was still traumatised by what had been done to her thousands of years ago. ‘Spit them out now, or there’s no deal!’
I looked back over at the wave and to the beach. There were dozens and dozens of people on the grey smudge of sand now, their torches blazing brightly as they waited for me to wash up onto the shore. They’d find me too- these waves were smashing only into that part of the world, and the current was strong and seemingly tireless. I didn’t know how long co
uld Kohl could keep this up for, but I knew his reserves of energy were greater than mine. As were his reserves of darkness. If the ocean were towing me out, that I could tolerate…. but washing me up in his arms? No, absolutely not.