by Thomas Hardy
The next morning it was wet.
"Now, dear," said Jude gaily at breakfast; "as this is SaturdayI mean to call about the banns at once, so as to get the firstpublishing done to-morrow, or we shall lose a week. Banns will do?We shall save a pound or two."
Sue absently agreed to banns. But her mind for the moment wasrunning on something else. A glow had passed away from her, anddepression sat upon her features.
"I feel I was wickedly selfish last night!" she murmured. "It wassheer unkindness in me--or worse--to treat Arabella as I did. Ididn't care about her being in trouble, and what she wished to tellyou! Perhaps it was really something she was justified in tellingyou. That's some more of my badness, I suppose! Love has its owndark morality when rivalry enters in--at least, mine has, if otherpeople's hasn't... I wonder how she got on? I hope she reached theinn all right, poor woman."
"Oh yes: she got on all right," said Jude placidly.
"I hope she wasn't shut out, and that she hadn't to walk the streetsin the rain. Do you mind my putting on my waterproof and going tosee if she got in? I've been thinking of her all the morning."
"Well--is it necessary? You haven't the least idea how Arabella isable to shift for herself. Still, darling, if you want to go andinquire you can."
There was no limit to the strange and unnecessary penances which Suewould meekly undertake when in a contrite mood; and this going tosee all sorts of extraordinary persons whose relation to her wasprecisely of a kind that would have made other people shun them washer instinct ever, so that the request did not surprise him.
"And when you come back," he added, "I'll be ready to go about thebanns. You'll come with me?"
Sue agreed, and went off under cloak and umbrella letting Jude kissher freely, and returning his kisses in a way she had never donebefore. Times had decidedly changed. "The little bird is caught atlast!" she said, a sadness showing in her smile.
"No--only nested," he assured her.
She walked along the muddy street till she reached the public housementioned by Arabella, which was not so very far off. She wasinformed that Arabella had not yet left, and in doubt how to announceherself so that her predecessor in Jude's affections would recognizeher, she sent up word that a friend from Spring Street had called,naming the place of Jude's residence. She was asked to stepupstairs, and on being shown into a room found that it was Arabella'sbedroom, and that the latter had not yet risen. She halted on theturn of her toe till Arabella cried from the bed, "Come in and shutthe door," which Sue accordingly did.
Arabella lay facing the window, and did not at once turn her head:and Sue was wicked enough, despite her penitence, to wish for amoment that Jude could behold her forerunner now, with the daylightfull upon her. She may have seemed handsome enough in profile underthe lamps, but a frowsiness was apparent this morning; and the sightof her own fresh charms in the looking-glass made Sue's mannerbright, till she reflected what a meanly sexual emotion this was inher, and hated herself for it.
"I've just looked in to see if you got back comfortably last night,that's all," she said gently. "I was afraid afterwards that youmight have met with any mishap?"
"Oh--how stupid this is! I thought my visitor was--your friend--yourhusband--Mrs. Fawley, as I suppose you call yourself?" said Arabella,flinging her head back upon the pillows with a disappointed toss, andceasing to retain the dimple she had just taken the trouble toproduce.
"Indeed I don't," said Sue.
"Oh, I thought you might have, even if he's not really yours.Decency is decency, any hour of the twenty-four."
"I don't know what you mean," said Sue stiffly. "He is mine, if youcome to that!"
"He wasn't yesterday."
Sue coloured roseate, and said, "How do you know?"
"From your manner when you talked to me at the door. Well, my dear,you've been quick about it, and I expect my visit last night helpedit on--ha-ha! But I don't want to get him away from you."
Sue looked out at the rain, and at the dirty toilet-cover, and at thedetached tail of Arabella's hair hanging on the looking-glass, justas it had done in Jude's time; and wished she had not come. In thepause there was a knock at the door, and the chambermaid brought in atelegram for "Mrs. Cartlett."
Arabella opened it as she lay, and her ruffled look disappeared.
"I am much obliged to you for your anxiety about me," she saidblandly when the maid had gone; "but it is not necessary you shouldfeel it. My man finds he can't do without me after all, and agreesto stand by the promise to marry again over here that he has made meall along. See here! This is in answer to one from me." She heldout the telegram for Sue to read, but Sue did not take it. "He asksme to come back. His little corner public in Lambeth would go topieces without me, he says. But he isn't going to knock me aboutwhen he has had a drop, any more after we are spliced by English lawthan before! ... As for you, I should coax Jude to take me beforethe parson straight off, and have done with it, if I were in yourplace. I say it as a friend, my dear."
"He's waiting to, any day," returned Sue, with frigid pride.
"Then let him, in Heaven's name. Life with a man is morebusinesslike after it, and money matters work better. And then, yousee, if you have rows, and he turns you out of doors, you can get thelaw to protect you, which you can't otherwise, unless he half-runsyou through with a knife, or cracks your noddle with a poker. Andif he bolts away from you--I say it friendly, as woman to woman, forthere's never any knowing what a man med do--you'll have the stickso' furniture, and won't be looked upon as a thief. I shall marry myman over again, now he's willing, as there was a little flaw in thefirst ceremony. In my telegram last night which this is an answerto, I told him I had almost made it up with Jude; and that frightenedhim, I expect! Perhaps I should quite have done it if it hadn't beenfor you," she said laughing; "and then how different our historiesmight have been from to-day! Never such a tender fool as Jude is ifa woman seems in trouble, and coaxes him a bit! Just as he used tobe about birds and things. However, as it happens, it is just aswell as if I had made it up, and I forgive you. And, as I say, I'dadvise you to get the business legally done as soon as possible.You'll find it an awful bother later on if you don't."
"I have told you he is asking me to marry him--to make our naturalmarriage a legal one," said Sue, with yet more dignity. "It wasquite by my wish that he didn't the moment I was free."
"Ah, yes--you are a oneyer too, like myself," said Arabella, eyeingher visitor with humorous criticism. "Bolted from your first, didn'tyou, like me?"
"Good morning!--I must go," said Sue hastily.
"And I, too, must up and off!" replied the other, springing out ofbed so suddenly that the soft parts of her person shook. Sue jumpedaside in trepidation. "Lord, I am only a woman--not a six-footsojer! ... Just a moment, dear," she continued, putting her hand onSue's arm. "I really did want to consult Jude on a little matter ofbusiness, as I told him. I came about that more than anything else.Would he run up to speak to me at the station as I am going? Youthink not. Well, I'll write to him about it. I didn't want to writeit, but never mind--I will."