by J. J. McAvoy
“Baby, why don’t we go get some horrible food at the cafeteria with the kids?” Declan came over, placing baby Darcy’s car seat down on the chair beside Helen, who was also nodding off.
Cora took a deep breath, her chest falling slowly as she faced me. “I feel like you are hiding something, Evelyn.”
I smiled. “Yes, a raging headache dear. Go spend time with your family and be happy…we won.” Not without wounds though.
She made a face at me before coming over and hugging me. Cora wasn’t a hugger, but I enjoyed it. I enjoyed her, and looking to Declan, I could see that he was still so in love.
“Okay already, go.” I pulled away.
She nodded, reaching in the car seat for Darcy while Declan picked up Helen. She opened her eyes sleepily and seeing me, she waved. Waving back, I watched as they went into the elevator.
“Ma’am.” The guards nodded to me, opening the door to Melody’s room. She sat up, looking better than she had an hour before, but not by much.
“You’re angry with me, aren’t you?” she whispered softly. I had a lot of feelings going through me, but I just sat down beside her, letting her express what I already knew she was feeling. “I couldn’t do it, Evelyn, not yet…I can’t. I tried. It would have been the perfect chance, but I’m not ready…it hurts.”
Reaching for her hand, I squeezed, blinking the tears from my eyes. “I know. If anyone in this world understands, Melody, it’s me…but this was close. Far too close. You don’t have much time. There is a price to pay for having this life, you have to make tough choices. Luckily you’re good at those.”
She nodded, blinking her tears away before getting fed up and using her other hand to wipe them away. “Damn family of yours has made me so bloody soft.”
I snickered. “Family of mine? Or family of ours? And after being so damn strong Mel, I think being soft for a little bit is a good thing, don’t you?”
“Ask me tomorrow.”
“You might not be soft tomorrow.
At that, she snickered. “Women, we can have it all…”
“Just not all at the same time.” I nodded. “When you’re ready…you’ll know it’s time.”
“Okay.” She nodded. “Can you do me a favor?”
“I thought I was?” My eyebrow rose, even though I was just teasing her. “What is it?”
A true smile spread across her face. Our Bloody Melody had come a long way.
LIAM
“Ma? Where we going?” I asked, watching the elevator. She’d had the kids go with Cora and then kidnapped me from my room. There was something about being dressed in a hospital gown while being pushed around by my mother that didn’t sit right with me.
“Why are you so worried? You think I’m a double agent or something?”
I snorted at that. There were two people I trusted completely: my mother and my wife. “You are just acting a little odd.”
“My sons are alive. It’s a beautiful day. Aren’t I allowed to celebrate?”
On second thought, maybe she was trying to kill me.
“Ouch. What was that for?” I rubbed my arm.
“I don’t like whatever you were thinking,” She said matter-of-factly as she wheeled me out of the elevator and toward the doors.
“So I’m not allowed to think—”
“Melody, can I just drop him here? He’s driving me mad,” my mother yelled out when we got to the roof.
Melody sat in a wheelchair of her own right beside a table. I turned back to my mother, who only winked at me as the doors closed.
“Hey,” she said casually to me as I wheeled myself over to the other side of the table.
“Mel, you should be in bed—”
“I brought a doctor.” She pointed to the man taking a smoke break behind me. I wasn’t sure how I felt about a doctor who was slowly giving himself lung cancer being her failsafe. “And I brought our smoothies.”
She placed the drink in front of me.
“Did I die?” I asked slowly, trying to think.
“Shut up and let me be nice, Jesus, you annoying fuck,” she snapped at me and I laughed, grabbing the cup and taking a sip.
“Mango?”
“It’s good for you, drink,” she muttered, looking out at the city. I couldn’t look away from her.
“Are you being romantic right now? Are we on a date?”
“Don’t make a big deal about it, Liam. Besides, you know I hate hospitals.” She didn’t look at me, just took a sip of her drink.
“I don’t know if I can not make a big deal out of this, Mel…it’s kind of a—”
“Look, the fireworks are about to start,” she cut in as firecracker shot into the sky.
“Fireworks? Melody, now I’m melting on the inside!” I gasped, my hand over my heart. “Do I get a ring?”
“Oh my God, you are so bloody damn annoying!” she screamed at me. I laughed, getting up out of my chair and leaning over to kiss her.
Sitting back in my chair, I took my drink and glanced over the city. “I would have liked kiwi, but mango is good too.”
She was too damn cute.
“Once again, Liam…we won.”
TWENTY-FIVE
“Some are born mad, some achieve madness, and some have madness thrust upon 'em.”
~ Emilie Autumn
FOUR YEARS LATER
LIAM
DAY 1
11:57 PM
“If we have to do another one of these damn police dinners next year I’m going to lose my mind,” I grumbled, pulling off my tie as the driver pulled away from the hotel. Melody rested her head against my arm but didn’t reply.
“Mel. Melody?”
“Huh?” She sat up, looking up at me. She had been out of it for days now.
“Are you all right?” I reached over, brushing her hair over to the side.
“Yeah, just tired.” She nodded, moving to sit back in her seat.
“I didn’t say stop leaning on me.” I frowned and she rolled her eyes at me.
“I’m going to—” I saw the headlights coming right behind her head.
“MELODY!” I screamed but before she or I or even our driver could do anything, the glass around us exploded and she flew toward me as we tossed and turned.
Metal crunched all around us…then darkness.
5:04 AM
“Liam?” I heard his voice.
“Declan?” I looked over to where he sat at my bedside, looking an absolute mess. “You look like shit.”
He didn’t say anything back, just nodded his head.
“What is it and what the hell did that doctor give me? I feel like I have cotton mouth.” I stretched out my mouth, sticking out my tongue.
“A mild sedative”
“Why?” I asked angrily…I couldn’t remember anything.
“You were ready to strangle the doctor.”
I shrugged at that.
“Wouldn’t be the first time. Oh—” I groaned as I pushed myself up and he moved to help. “I got it. How bad are my wounds?”
“A broken leg and shoulder, along with a ruptured eardrum and a few bruised ribs,” he replied as if he were reading it from my damn chart or something.
“And Melody?” I stretched my neck “She was on the side of the car when it was hit. How is she? They should have just put us in the same room, she is going to bitch at me.”
He didn’t say anything.
Why isn’t he saying anything?
“I asked you a question brother; how is my wife?”
He just stared at his fucking feet. My heart started to race and whatever daze I was in completely disappeared.
“I’m going to ask you one more time—”
“Please don’t brother.” He took a deep breath, his chest shaking when he exhaled. “Please don’t make me say it.”
“Say what? What don’t you want to say? I asked you, how is my wife? Your reply should be ‘a little banged up but healing, she’s with the kids’ or ‘asleep, you
can see her later.’ Those are not hard things to say Declan, so fucking say it!”
He opened his mouth and then shook his head. “Melody…is… Liam…I’m so… Her heart couldn’t take it.”
What?
What?
I did not understand.
“Declan, what are you saying to me right now?”
It was so silent I could hear that neither of us was breathing, the only noise coming from the machine attached to my arm.
“Liam…we lost her. Melody died at 1:09 AM this morning.”
I sat there, my mind blank for the longest time.
Melody was dead?
My wife was dead?
The woman who ruled Chicago.
The mother of my children.
The one person who kept my heart beating was dead.
I laughed.
I laughed so hard my ribs hurt.
“You’re insane,” I said to him, unable to stop laughing. “Do you know who my wife is? She doesn’t die. My wife doesn’t die, Declan, so try again, with a story I believe.”
“She was rushed in with a massive bleed like you were, but her heart couldn’t take the stress and gave out—”
“BULLSHIT!” I hollered, pulling the IV from my arm and getting out of bed. “BULLSHIT. Where is she, Declan?”
“Liam—”
“Do not touch me!” I smacked his hand away. “I said, where is she? Melody. This joke is not funny. I’m done listening to you so get the fuck out of my way.”
The cast on my leg made it impossible to walk straight but I didn’t care. I grabbed the IV drip pole for balance as I limped toward the door. They were all there, everyone but Neal and the children; Mina, Cora, and my mother all sat outside.
“Liam, you should be resting.”
I stared her in the eye. “Ma, for some reason Declan wants to fuck with me today, so if I kill him, now you know why.”
“Liam, I’m so—”
“SHUT UP!” I snapped at Mina as she reached out to me. Who the fuck did she think she was?
“Where is Melody?” I looked at each of their faces and they all looked like Declan. “Fine, I’ll find someone with a medical degree to answer the fucking question since it is so goddamn hard for you all!”
Limping down the hall toward the nurses station, I ran into a doctor—well actually, the woman nearly ran me over.
“I’m so sorry I—”
“I’m looking for my wife, Melody Callahan. 5’9”, black hair, brown eyes, Italian. Where do I go?”
She just stared at me like a baby deer. Pinching the bridge of my nose, I took a deep breath. “She also happens to be the governor…”
“We know who she was.” Another doctor came up beside her.
“Was? That is past tense. How long have I been asleep? Did I miss an election?”
Silence.
“SOMEBODY SPEAK!”
“Liam, I’ll take you to her.” Declan came up beside me. “You need to rest—”
“Declan, I swear to God I’m going to kill you if you don’t stop this shit. Either take me to her or stop butting in.”
The all looked at each other before he nodded them.
“Right this way, Mr. Callahan.” Doctor Baby Deer led me to the elevators and I still couldn’t think when I got on. My mind was blank, just empty.
The more silent they were, the more I could hear my own heart beating…screaming.
The doors opened and the first thing I noticed was that the floor was dimly lit, just like when I’d gone to see my…
“Liam,” Declan called to me when I didn’t get off.
I shook my head. “I know this floor. I’ve been to this floor before. She isn’t here. Let’s go.”
“Liam—”
“SHE IS NOT ON THIS FLOOR.”
“Okay,” he said. He got back on the elevator alone, the other doctor disappearing. The doors closed and we went up, just the two of us.
“Take the next one,” he said to a group of people when the doors opened. We waited for them to close again.
“Tell me you’re lying,” I whispered, gripping the pole beside me. “Tell me I’m having a nightmare…tell me anything but what you told me before.”
He didn’t reply and bit by bit, I felt myself crumble.
“We will ride this elevator as long as it takes. We get off only when you are…only when you are ready to see her.”
Never. If it was the same place I last saw my father then never.
8:11 AM
Three hours. It had taken us three hours to get back to that floor. My legs had given out at some point and he had gotten me a wheelchair. I hated those things; they reminded me of when I was a kid. I would rather walk on a broken foot…but I couldn’t find the strength so he just wheeled me down the hall. When we got to the room, I felt sick, so sick my chest started to rise and fall again.
“Liam—”
“Show me!” I wouldn’t believe it. I couldn’t believe it. They were going to open it and she wouldn’t be there, I knew it.
The coroner pulled out the drawer, and I stood up when she slid out the silver bed.
“AH!” I gasped out.
“I’m so sorry.” Declan held on to me as I sobbed.
“Mel? Melody!”
It was her. Just lying there. That was it? She didn’t die this way. No. We had plans and I hadn’t gotten to say goodbye…or even…I hadn’t said anything to her. “Ahh! MELODY!”
This couldn’t be real.
It was a nightmare.
“NO! Get off of me. Get off.” I shoved him and moved to her, grabbing her cold shoulders. “Melody get your ass off this table. GET UP! Wake UP! WAKE UP! You don’t die, remember? You said that you said it! SO GET THE FUCK UP!”
Nothing.
Me. Her. Everything…it equaled nothing.
TWENTY-SIX
“So it’s true, when all is said and done, grief is the price we pay for love.”
~ E.A. Bucchianeri
LIAM
DAY 3
Knock.
Knock.
“Liam? I brought you some food.”
Grabbing the lamp at the side of my bed, I threw it at the door before shifting back onto the ground, lifting the bottle back up to my lips and pressing play for the video on my tablet to start again.
“Liam, get that out of my face—I swear I’m going to hurt you.” She pushed the camera aside.
“How can you hurt a man with a face like mine?” I said, in sync with my recorded self.
She paused to think. “With a hammer, a blow torch, or safety scissors, if I’m feeling creative…”
“Let’s put that mind to better use.”
“Liam don’t! Liam! HAHA!” I tackled her to the ground, holding the camera to her face.
“Say it.”
“Say what?”
“Say you love me.”
“Liam we need to finish—”
“I’m not letting you up until you say it.”
She made a face into the camera. “Does it count if you are forcing me?”
“Yes, because I know you mean it anyway.”
“You are so—”
“Say it—”
“Oh my God, fine! I love you, Liam. I, Melody Nicci Giovanni Callahan, LOVE YOU! Are you happy now?”
I smiled just as hard as I had back then. “Yeah. I’m over the moon because I love you too.”
The video cut…and I drank.
DAY 5
“Liam.”
“Mel?” I whispered, turning around, but instead it was my mother kneeling beside me. She put her hand on my head and I just turned back over, coming face to face with too many bottles to count.
“Liam, we can’t hold out on the funeral any longer, it’s in two days.”
“Go then, I’ll stay here,” I whispered, reaching over to find a bottle with anything left in it.
“Liam, your children—’
“Can you lock the door behind you, Ma? I’m tire
d.”
She brushed my hair back, kissing my forehead. “No one else on this planet understands this pain like I do. I know you feel like you are being burned alive, but you have too much to do. Your kids need you, I need you too. You wouldn’t let me leave you when your father left and I won’t let you do it now either.”
My tears rolled over my nose and onto the ground beside me. “That’s because I’m selfish, Ma.”
I had nothing more to say.
Again she kissed my forehead. “I swear after the funeral it will be different.”
How? Why? What was the point?
DAY 6
“It has been six days since the death of beloved Illinois governor Melody Callahan and the world is mourning. Some of our viewers may not remember this, but I was in the UK after the death of Princess Diana, and the cloud that hung over that country is very present here today. Outside the Callahan mansion, people of all walks of life, and not only from Illinois, have come to pay tribute, leaving flowers, candles, and teddy bears, some even leaving Cubs jerseys—Melody Callahan’s favorite team—outside the family gates. Her funeral tomorrow has drawn not only politicians, but also the likes of Amelia London and Noah Sloan, long-time family friends of the Callahan’s who have both commented on this tragic loss. Many are coming from all over to pay respect to this great woman…”
The news had been saying the same thing all day. I hadn’t meant to turn it on, but I couldn’t find the damn remote…none of that mattered. None if it did. Placing the bullets in the revolver, I held it up to the side of my head. I could feel myself shaking…it was almost over…the pain…everything would be over.
All I needed to do was pull the trigger.
Closing my eyes, the last thought in my head was—
“It’s Donatella, Melody Callahan’s daughter—she’s running out of the house.”
A chill went up my spine as I turned back around to the television. Rising up to stare at my daughter as she ran to the gates, I watched as one by one she ripped everything down, tearing the posters and pulling off the teddy bears.