by A. B. Medley
A few tears of my own track down my cheeks. “He’s your dad too. You can call him that if you want. He told me he wants us to all be a family. No more hiding.” I gently squeeze her hand.
She sniffles and looks up at me. “I’d like that if your mom is okay with it. I don’t know if I’ll ever really have a relationship with my dad—uh, Steve—again. He raised me, and I’d like to think we could, but he left and didn’t really look back. So much time has passed, and he doesn’t seem to care to talk to me much. It’s been just me and Mom for a lot of years now. Mom will support whatever I want to do. She finally told me what happened, and it matches with what your dad says happened. But Ivie, I won’t hurt your mom in any way, so if she’s uncomfortable with this at all, I’ll back off.”
“No, Lucy, she loves you. Yeah, it hurts knowing that Dad stepped out on her, even if it was just once, but they’re going to work through that. They’re starting marriage counseling just to make sure she doesn’t suppress any feelings that could blow up later. She’s already forgiven him. That’s just the kind of person she is. She’ll accept you with open arms, just as she always has. You’ve always been family.”
“I appreciate that. Maybe one day soon we can all sit down together for dinner or something.”
“Mom would love it. Dad too.” I lean over and bump her shoulder. “I know with the other stuff you said you have to do it on your own, but you’re not alone. I’ve got your back. Just know I’m here, okay?”
She swipes at a tear and gives me a small smile. “Don’t give up on Sterling, Ivie. I have a feeling he’ll come around.”
“I wouldn’t be so sure, Lucy. He would’ve been here if he loved me like he said he did. And even if does, he’s chosen to give me up, give us up. I’m better off focusing on my new job here and finding a place to live. I can’t stay here forever.”
I hear the back door open and close. Mom and Dad walk in. “Hey, girls,” Dad says, smiling warmly. For the first time in forever, he seems unburdened. He walks over to the couch and drops a kiss on my head and then Lucy’s. Mom watches and comes over to hug me and Lucy both.
“Lucy, I’m glad you’re here. I hope we can have dinner soon, as a family,” Mom says as she reaches for Dad’s hand. He takes it and kisses her knuckles, beaming at her and then us.
“That would be nice, Mrs. Davis.” Lucy says back to Mom.
“Don’t you dream of calling me Mrs. Davis. Just call me Rayna. I can fix anything you want, just let me know. I can’t wait. We can set it up for one night this week.” Lucy nods and Mom walks toward the kitchen, leaving us with Dad.
Dad stands there for a few minutes. “Lucy, I just want you to know I want to get to know you better, as my daughter, not as my daughter’s best friend. I won’t push you, just know when and if you’re ready to talk and take that step, I’m here.” He starts to turn and follow Mom then stops and faces us again. “I do love you, Lucy, I always have. I got lucky enough to get to watch you grow up more closely than I could’ve hoped for since you’ve always been so close to Ivie.”
Lucy’s chin trembles, and I can see her fighting back her tears. She doesn’t speak, just nods in understanding. Dad gives her one more smile and leaves the room. I rub Lucy’s back. She leans on my shoulder. We sit that way until my phone dings.
Briella: Are you at home, little mama?
Me: Yes why? You know I’m on the couch like I was yesterday when you came over.
Briella: I’m just making sure you aren’t overdoing it. You’re carrying my favorite niece or nephew, you know?
Me: LOL. I know what I’m doing Bree.
Briella: Ha, we’ll see. Go put on a clean shirt and leggings. I bet you haven’t changed since yesterday; it’ll make you feel better.
Me: Are you saying I stink?
Briella: Someone has to say it. LOL. I’m on my way over, and I have a surprise for you. For real, clean up as much as you can.
Me: Ohhhkay Bree, I think you’ve taken one too many kicks to the head when you’ve been sparring at the gym. But for you I’ll make myself not stink.
Briella: Thanks, little mama. You’ll thank me later. Be there in fifteen.
I laugh a little. Lucy sits up. “Who are you laughing at?”
“Briella. She told me to change because I probably stink and she’s on her way over with a surprise, and the bad part is, I’m still in the clothes I slept in. So, she’s not entirely wrong.” I roll my eyes, wondering what kind of food she’s bringing, because that seems to be what everyone is bringing me lately. I guess they’re trying to fatten me up since I’m eating for two now.
Lucy hops up and grabs my hand to help me up. I see a twinkle in her eye. “What are you so excited about? She’s just bringing more food, I’m sure. She’s been learning my favorites because she wants to make sure I eat and that I eat enough.”
“It doesn’t matter why she’s coming; it gives you an excuse to freshen up a little. And it’ll probably make you feel better.” She smiles sweetly like she swallowed a secret.
“Lucy, what do you know?” I pin her under my glare.
She holds both hands up by her face in surrender. “Nothing, I swear.”
She helps me to my room and shuts the door. She goes to my closet and grabs me a purple knee-length T-shirt dress. “Do you want to try to shower? I can try to help, or just sit in here until you get done.”
“Yeah, that would be great.” Lucy turns on the shower spray and grabs a chair from by desk to sit in the doorway of the bathroom near me but facing my bedroom to give me privacy.
I get in and let the warm water wash over me. I’m careful to wash around my stitches from my gunshot wound. When I get out, I pat dry the site and then finish drying off. Lucy has laid out a comfy bra and underwear for me. I carefully put them on and then put on the dress she got out. I finish towel drying my hair then put some leave-in conditioner in and comb out the tangles.
“Do you want me to blow dry your hair for you?”
“No, I’m just going to let it air dry, but thanks. You’re right, I do feel so much better now.”
Suddenly I hear Briella’s laugh fill the house. I smile at Lucy. “Sounds like she’s here with that surprise.”
“Sounds like it,” Lucy agrees.
Lucy opens my bedroom door and we both follow the voice into the kitchen. I see Briella and start to smile when I stop in my tracks. My eyes land on Sterling, in my kitchen, hands shoved in his pockets. On the counter there is the most beautiful vase of flowers I’ve ever seen, white and red tulips. He smiles, albeit hesitantly, questions swirling in his brown eyes.
What the heck? My stomach flips at the sight of him. I can’t speak, I just breathe out and look at him.
There’s nothing but silence for a minute as we stare at each other. Briella finally clears her throat. “Mr. and Mrs. Davis, I was wondering if you and Lucy wanted to grab dessert at Frank’s Diner. I heard they made a mean blackberry cobbler tonight.”
They all say yes and scatter like the cowardly critters they are. But as they walk out, Rhett and Lucy both give me a look that I read as you better not mess this up. I’m left with Ivie staring a hole through me with the most beautiful green eyes I’ve ever seen—the eyes I’ve tried to shut out of my dreams over the last week.
I step toward her, and she steps back. “Ivie, please. We need to talk.”
She tilts her chin up, daring me to say more. “If it’s not about the baby, I’m not sure what about, Sterling.”
“I deserve that.” I take my hands out of my pockets and let them hang at my sides. “But you’re wrong. We need to talk about us.”
Her eyes widen just a fraction. “There is no us, not really, Sterling. You don’t trust me. I don’t know if I trust you.”
I step toward her again and she steps back, almost hitting the wall. “Damn it, Ivie, you ran away from me after hearing me tell Bree about the baby instead of staying and talking it out. Then I got pictures sent to me of you and Dean. You’ve always ru
n, Ivie. That time you ran right into my best friend’s arms who just happens to be your ex. What was I supposed to think? And whatever you saw with Jade was a cruel joke and her trying to get to you; it was not real then and certainly not real now.”
Ivie shakes her head, and I can see her wall start to crack. “You saw that kiss and you used it to run instead of confronting me. This time you ran with a secret, one that affects me just as much as it affects you. Two, actually.”
Ivie looks at me, confused. “I didn’t run, I left town for a night, but I came right back. When I left, I just didn’t know what to do. It felt like my heart had been ripped out, Sterling. It felt like I had already lost you no matter what we wanted. It was only later that night when Briella followed me home to Camden Springs, that I figured out I was pregnant, and I left your house the day I overheard you and Briella because we were both upset, emotions running high. I thought it would be better to cool off, for the both of us. Angry words can’t be taken back.” She sniffles trying to fight back a sob.
I step even closer, and she steps back again, finally hitting the wall. I reach out and put my hand on her face, tipping her chin up so she’s looking me in the eyes. “I’m sorry, Ivie. I never meant to hurt you. Please forgive me.”
She closes her eyes, making the tears spill down her cheeks. I kiss them away and then kiss her lips. She kisses me back but just barely.
“I don’t know, Sterling. I may forgive you, but I don’t know if I can forget. You left me. You left me when you knew I needed you.” She starts to come apart, and I pull her to me and hold her against my body, willing her to somehow let me take all doubt and the pain from her.
She doesn’t try to get out of my embrace. When she calms down enough to talk, she pushes on my chest, and I let her go.
She walks into the living room and sits down. I sit beside her, waiting on her to say something. My heart is in her hands.
She looks over at me with red-rimmed eyes. “I do forgive you, Sterling. But I’m not sure how to forget you turning around and leaving me to deal with all this by myself.”
Panic surges through me. “I didn’t leave you. I’ve been here the whole time.”
“But you did. You left me in that hospital. You said you’d be back, but you never came back. I needed you. I was so scared that I would lose this baby, too. You let me go through that alone. I’m not out of the woods yet. Things look promising, but anything could happen. It’s still early.”
“I thought about you and the baby every day, Ivie. I checked up on you every day. I just needed to think. Bree and Tate kept me updated on your condition, and the baby.”
Ivie lets out a humorless laugh. “I’m so glad they could make you feel better about you leaving me alone, Sterling. And yes, I was surrounded by people who care, but I didn’t have the one person that I needed more than anyone else. You. How could you do that to me?”
I stare at her, unable to answer. I don’t know what I was thinking. Yes, I needed time to think, but she’s right. I left her scared and alone. Me, the one person who really knows how she was feeling about the possibility of losing another baby. “I’m so sorry, Ivie. It was a mistake. I needed time. Time to process all that had happened. But I shouldn’t have left you alone. I can’t undo it, as much as I wish I could. I can only sit here and ask you to forgive me. I love you, Ivie. I want this baby, and I want you. I promise if you give me another chance, I’ll do everything I can to make it up to you, if you’ll let me, and I’ll never leave you again.”
I hold her hand, and we sit in silence for a while. She finally leans her head on my shoulder, and I breathe a little easier.
“I need some time, Sterling. Just give me a few days. I love you too. But we need to examine the fact that you didn’t trust me, and I didn’t trust you, and we both assumed the worst. We need to figure this out, not just for us, but for the baby.”
I feel like she just squeezed my heart so tight it will stop beating. “I understand. I’ll give you your time. Just don’t shut me out. Please. And whatever you need with the baby, I’ll be there.”
I get up and head to the door to leave. I turn and look at her. “Ivie, I love you. I always have and always will. It was always supposed to be you.” I feel the tears sting my eyes and leave without another glance back. I brought this on myself. Everyone was right. I should’ve been there instead of letting my own doubts destroy the best thing to happen to me. All I can do is wait and hope and pray she forgives me and gives us another chance. I swear if she does, I’ll never let a day pass again without her knowing just how much she means to me.
I pull up at home and find Tate and Dean on the front porch, both with a beer in hand. I walk up to them, and they both wait expectantly. I shake my head and walk past them. I go into the kitchen and grab my own beer.
Tate speaks first. “How’d it go, man?”
“It wasn’t that great,” I admit.
“Did you give her the flowers?” Tate asks.
“Yes, Romeo, I did. She glanced at them for a few seconds before slapping me in her mind.” I clench my teeth together at the memory.
Tate puts a hand on my shoulder. “So, how did you leave it?”
“She says she needs time. I have no choice but to give it to her. I told her how sorry I am and asked her to forgive me. She does, but I’m not sure she will forget me leaving when she needed me in the hospital.”
Dean looks down, and Tate’s gaze hardens. He knows I messed up. I know I messed up. Now I’m at her mercy.
Dean looks back up. “Don’t lose hope, Sterling. She loves you. I think she’ll come around. Don’t give up on her.”
“I’m not going anywhere. I want to make this right and be a family with her and the baby.”
Dean grins, flashing me his perfect white teeth. He had braces when we were in school, and they still look perfect. “Congratulations on the baby, man, and I’m sorry about y’all losing the first one all those years ago.” He slaps me on the shoulder.
“Thanks,” I say as I smile and then take a drink from my beer. I’m still trying to wrap my head around losing our first one but becoming a father anyway to this one. I feel nervous but excited.
Tate lifts his beer in the air. “I’ll drink to that. Baby Brigg is on the way. I can’t wait to see you get wrapped around that baby’s little finger.” He chuckles as Dean and I clink our bottles to his and then take a drink.
“Who knew you’d be the first to have a baby?” Dean laughs with Tate.
“Laugh it up, boys. Tate’s caving on his no-dating policy. We should talk about that.”
Tate snaps his mouth closed. “You’re dreaming, Brigg. I’m not the kind to settle down. Your boy Dean will one day, I’m sure, but not me.”
Dean and Tate bump fists. I tell Dean, “You just wait. Tate will be the next one to fall head over heels. I think he’s about half there now.” Tate gives me a dirty look as Dean laughs harder.
Tate looks at Dean. “I don’t know why you’re laughing, jerk. You can’t even make up your mind where you want to be. Dude, make a decision already.”
Dean punches Tate in the arm. “I’ll make up my mind on my own time, John Wayne.”
We laugh and cut up for a while. It gets late, so I tell the guys to crash here. Dean takes the recliner, and Tate takes the couch. I start to head for my room when Dean says, “Really, man, everything with Ivie will be fine.”
Tate pipes in too. “Yeah brother, it will.”
“Thanks for being here, guys.” I head down the hall to my bedroom and feel my phone buzz in my pocket.
Ivie: Why the flowers?
Me: I wanted to give you something with meaning.
Ivie: What do they mean?
Me: Well tulips in general mean deep and perfect love. But the white ones mean forgiveness and red means perfect love. I thought they fit.
Ivie: How do you know what they mean? Isn’t that a girl thing to know stuff like that?
Me: Just ask Tate, he’s a flower whi
sperer. LOL
Ivie: Goodnight, Sterling
Me: Goodnight, baby girl. <3
I get ready for bed and lie down. I smile a little, knowing she’s thinking about the flowers. There may be hope for us yet. Not that I’m admitting that to Tate.
A week has passed since Sterling came to apologize and win me back. I haven’t given him an answer. I’ve talked to him some throughout the week on the phone and through text messages. Later today, I have an appointment to see to see Dr. Ray. We’re going to do our first series of ultrasounds. In my heart, no matter where things lie between me and Sterling, I know I need to give him the opportunity to be there.
I work up the courage a little after lunch to call him. He picks up on the first ring. “Ivie, is everything okay?”
“Yeah, it is. I just, um, I have a doctor’s appointment today. I was wondering if you’d like to be there too. We’re doing an ultrasound.”
I hear him breathing, and he finally replies. “I’ll be there. What time is the appointment and where?”
“It’s at four o’clock this afternoon. Dr. Ray has an office inside of Greendale Med on the second floor. I can meet you there.”
“Okay, I’ll see you then. And Ivie…thank you.”
I smile to myself. “I’ll see you soon.”
I get to the second floor of Greendale Med, and I see Sterling leaned against the wall next to the door to Dr. Ray’s office. He’s in a black button-down shirt with jeans and black combat boots. His sleeves are rolled up his forearms. His dark blonde hair is spiked a little in the front, the rest is carefully in place. He has a little facial hair now, and he looks delicious. His brown eyes look up to meet mine, and my heart pounds.
He looks me over from head to toe. “You look beautiful, Ivie.” His smile makes me feel warm and tingly.
“Thanks. You look pretty good yourself.”
He opens the door for me, and I walk through and check in with the front desk. We sit for a few minutes before we’re called back. We’re brought into a room that’s dark and has a television on the wall and a computer at a desk. There’s a bed or table of some kind with stirrups.