She pulled her hand free. “You could be friends with anyone.”
“So could you.”
“No, I don't think I can. My sisters are enough.”
In her periphery she caught him studying her—glancing back and forth between the road and her. “Are you sure about that?”
“I have to be.”
He reached over and grasped her hand again. She didn't have the strength to pull back this time. Her eyelids gave up and closed.
20
Declan hooked his cane on the edge of the counter's lip and settled himself on the stool. “She's asleep.” He brushed cat hair off his trousers.
Phoenix had conked out the second he'd laid her in her bed, Moonlight curled up next to her. He'd spent half an hour sitting in that rocking chair—a surprise to find in her bedroom—watching her chest rise and fall, all that red hair spilled over the silk pillowcase.
At one point her cat jumped off and stalked toward him only to brush back and forth up against his pants, sending her one good yellow eye accusingly up at him as if trying to send him a message. As soon as he reached down to pet her, she bristled. Phoenix and this cat were well matched—both needing love and refusing it.
He only rose from his sentinel post when Luna came to him with an offer of eggplant parmesan. Now, Starr and Nathan had long gone back to his place, and only he and Luna remained awake. Perhaps now he’d get some answers, like what the ever-loving hell Phoenix was doing on that street again.
Luna wiped a bowl with a rag. “Thanks for getting her home and for handling all the paperwork.”
“Least I can do. Thanks for dinner.”
“Dinner was the least I could do.”
“So, Carragh MacKenna. Want to tell me how that happened?”
She shrugged, set the bowl inside a cabinet, and closed its door. “Not sure. He said he'd found her on South Haven street. That's near Maxim's.” Luna sighed. “She's started up again.”
Weren't those his exact words to Phoenix the other night? “Yes.”
“We have to stop it. It's not helpful.” Luna shook her head slowly. “And if Jones caught her…”
“I know.” His forehead pinched. “And Carragh being conveniently by? Nothing that man does is a coincidence. Tell me if you see him again, okay?”
She twisted her mouth back and forth. “He doesn't seem that dangerous.”
He studied Luna—really looked into her wide eyes. Phoenix was right. She was being too calm. “He is. Please, be careful.' He glanced toward the hallway that led to the girls' rooms. “For your sister's sake if nothing else.”
She leaned against the countertop. “I'd never take a chance there. None of us would.”
“Good, especially now that Ruark might get out.”
“Emphasis on might.” She fiddled with the saltshaker. “You know, Declan, I've been wondering why you're so enamored of a woman who isn't returning your…” She trailed off.
“My affections?” He chuffed. “I owe Phoenix.”
“Like you owed Nathan?”
Well, that was an entirely different matter, wasn't it? “Not exactly.” He owed Nathan, of course. Nathan had interfered in a fight between Declan and Daniel MacKenna, that clan’s golden boy, and went to prison for nine years for accidentally killing him. If Declan had only handled the MacKennas himself, then maybe Nathan wouldn't have felt it necessary to step up and rescue him. If Daniel had tried to take a swing at Declan today he'd have landed the fatal blow himself. Then again, he'd have gone to jail—or been killed for his act.
Luna set her chin in the palm of her hand. “I don't mean to pry, but maybe I can help. If I know more.”
Ah, so she knew there was a story. “In order to tell you more, I'd have to bring up bad memories for you.”
“It has something to do with Maxim's, the strip club you found us in, doesn't it? I wasn't there that night things went down.”
“I'm glad you weren't.” Once more, he caught himself staring at her. Like Phoenix, an intelligence shone in her eyes, something he hadn't really studied before. While Starr charged forward, reckless, and Phoenix was as stubborn as a feral cat, Luna always appeared as the Pollyanna of the triplets. Perhaps she wasn't so blindly optimistic, however.
He sucked in a long breath. “Okay. But I have to start further back than that evening I met Phoenix.” Where should he begin?
She circled the island and took the stool next to him.
“You know I am related to the MacKennas. I found out rather late in life my mother was Tomas MacKenna's sister, and when she died, they found me.”
She nodded once.
“You also know that I went to prison for vehicular manslaughter. An interesting development shortly after my refusal to be folded into the family.”
“Misdemeanor.” She flushed suddenly, perhaps at his reaction. “I mean, so I heard.”
Of course, she had. Nothing was secret long at Shakedown.
“Criminal negligence resulting in another's death. Got two years.”
She didn't flinch at a single word he spoke.
“I'd made a huge mistake, getting behind the wheel of a car with three glasses of wine in my system. Enough to be over the line. Of course, the failed brake lines didn't help. The fact I didn't even try to stop when that pedestrian stepped into the crosswalk helped get me the conviction.”
“What?” Her eyes widened.
So, she hadn't heard everything about him.
“I suspect tampering with my car was a shot over the bow by Tomas MacKenna. For not being willing to jump at the chance to work with him. After he felt I learned my lesson or perhaps toughened up from such an experience, I was inexplicably released ahead of schedule.”
“And you came back to Baltimore.”
“Where else was I going to go? They'd have found me either way and at least here I had friends. So, to the night I met Phoenix. I was out for a few days, trying to get used to walking through a door without someone telling me I could. Not my proudest moment, but I ended up at Maxim's.”
There—a visible shudder ran through her whole body.
“Like I said. Bad memories for everyone.” Except it held his most treasured one. “Maybe I'll tell this story another time.”
“No, please.” She laid her hand on his forearm, stopping him from rising.
He glanced down at her small hand against his suit jacket. “That. That's what she did for me.”
She lifted her hand. “What?”
“She touched me when no one else would. She smiled at me. Talked softly to me. Made me feel like a person again.” He resettled on the stool. “Seems like such a small, silly thing when I say it aloud like that.” He shook his head, studied his shoes. “It's the truth though. Prison can break a man in a thousand ways. Nathan was beaten within an inch of his life.”
She shuddered at that.
“For me, it was different. I wasn't touched—not that I'd cozy up to another man and certainly not one of them. But after a year of being completely, utterly left alone… Anyway, this leg never healed properly after the accident, and when I got out of prison? Well, let's say no one was interested in touching me then, either.” He tapped his leg with his cane. “So, I had this notion, go to a strip club. Pay for someone to. And then there she was.” He had to pause, just like he had the first time he laid eyes on her. “Sure, I hadn't been with women in a couple of years, but Phoenix…” He slowly shook his head. “She had a catastrophic beauty.” To this day, his mind could call up her image.
Some men admired breasts, legs, hair, but for him, it'd always been the eyes. He couldn't stop staring into hers—all that sea-blue full of secrets, intelligence, and pain. His heart lurched recalling it.
He scratched at his chin. “There she was, all porcelain skin and delicate bones hovering over a lunk like me, and all I could think was the world was fucking unfair. What was she doing there? How did she get to that place? And what was I doing there? Then she offered me—”
�
��A second dance on the house. Phee told us that much,” she added quickly.
“Having a record, little money, and this…” He tapped his leg again. “My limp was more severe then. I believe she took pity on me.”
“Or maybe it was because she was on probation for hitting a customer and saw you were a gentleman—for once.” Luna smirked a little at that. “I was shocked she hadn't been fired by then.”
“Yeah, well, it was that second lap dance that got her in trouble. It was on the house, she'd said, to celebrate my being released. She'd gotten me to reveal that, amazingly. Anyway, Jones found out immediately.”
“She got punched by him. I remember.”
“So do I, and it was more than once.” He should have intervened more but instead ended up being thrown out on his ass. “What you don't know is that night I was planning on getting a few lap dances, getting loaded, and maybe walking into the river. I'd lost my business, my life. And then to discover I was a MacKenna, and they'd never let me run? Would send me to prison if they had to? Well, she gave me a reason to fight. Anyone who could give kindness like that under her circumstances? Well, she deserved the second chance I was about to throw away.”
Luna sat back. “Wow, Declan. That's…”
“A lot? She saved me and now I won't stop until she's okay. And she's not okay, Luna.”
“Yeah.”
Of course, Luna would be the sister to understand. A few months ago she'd tried to help Phee make peace with her father, albeit failing spectacularly.
“But if Phoenix doesn't turn around, you wouldn't—”
“No. I have no plans on offing myself with or without Phoenix.”
“That's good to hear. Things were that bad?”
He nodded slowly, clamping down the memories of what ultimately drove him to consider such an act.
Luna looked at him expectantly. She was kind. All three of the O'Malley sisters were, in their own way. Even Phoenix, the firebrand.
“I mean…” she began and stopped. “The MacKennas, they—”
“Are that bad, Luna.” He was going to have to tell her all of it. “My mother kept diaries. After she died, I read them and finally understood why she would stare at the window sometimes, tears in her eyes for no reason whatsoever. She had no one to help her.” He had to stop for a second and catch his breath. “I asked her on her deathbed, did she get enough? She responded with, ‘What is enough, anyway? Someday you'll find someone to help. Help her instead.’ I remember it distinctly.”
“So, Phoenix is that someone.”
“Phoenix keeps me awake… if that makes sense. Fighting.” He chuffed. “Not very romantic, is it?
“I don't think Phee believes in romance. It's a shame, really.”
“Oh, I think you have enough of that to cover her.” He winked.
She flushed a little but then recovered. “Can I give you some advice? Don't tell her any of this yet. She's…”
“Burdened. Still.” He could see it in her face every time he looked at her. She wore her past like some women wore makeup.
Every time she rebutted him, it only made him love her more. It raised up a primal urge to take out those who'd hurt her and then haul her into his arms once revenge had been meted. He fought it every goddamn second of his life, knowing instinctively she would not respond to that. It was his own brand of hell, the desire to act but being unable to.
He stood and stretched. “So, that's the story. When I first met Phoenix, I thought I could be her savior—and she's been breaking my heart ever since.”
“And yet you've been helping us ever since.”
“Or not. Maybe continuing on isn't in her best interest. If you didn't dance at Shakedown, what would you do?”
Her lips thinned and she slowly shook her head. “Dance somewhere else? We'd probably end up travelling around. Not many clubs exist like Shakedown. “
“How about doing something other than dancing?”
“We don't know how to do anything else. We'd probably work in a coffee shop or retail. Ick. And I think that's why Phee is so angry. I don't think her life is enough for her.”
Like his mother. He could see Phee's potential. She snuck books from his library—mostly the classics. He'd moved his entire collection of them to his office just so she could keep doing it. He liked the idea of her touching his things.
“Well.” He rose. “We have to make sure she never goes back to Maxim's.”
“Declan… what are you going to do now? Sit in that rocking chair and watch her all night?”
Of course, he would.
21
Phee rolled to her back, the sheet catching on her ankle. It was so stiff. She rubbed the bandage with her other foot. Oh, yeah, she'd stupidly fallen on her ass in the rain on South Haven Street. She shuddered—recalling the black rage that had filled Jones' eyes at seeing her made her shudder under the sheets. Then that other guy? He was a new bodyguard, and he'd begun to move for her. She could have so easily been dragged into his car, the alley, or back into Maxim's.
“Phoenix.”
Her body seized. Move, move, move, her brain screamed, and still nothing except her eyes that furiously searched the shadows could. Movement came to shape in her rocking chair. That was all it took for her body's paralysis to break. She kicked at the sheet, shrank back to her headboard, and managed to rise to standing, her ankle giving out a sharp pain, her palms flat against the wall.
“Get the fuck out!” Her scream made her head pound like someone was punching her forehead from the inside. Moonlight. Where was she?
“It's me,” a male voice sounded calmly. Declan. It was Declan.
Soft footfalls padded in the hallway and then Luna was in the doorway. She immediately dropped to the bed and held out her hand. “Bad dream?”
“I'm fine.” Phee lowered herself to the bed, careful not to step on her sprained ankle. Her heart slapped against her rib cage and she gulped air.
Something ticked in Declan's jaw. He needed to stop staring at her that way.
“Sorry.” She'd screamed like a lunatic. Moonlight was probably cowering in her closet.
“No, I'm sorry. I scared you.” His eyes fixed on her. “Luna, I've got this.”
Luna glanced at him. “No, I'm—”
“I'm okay,” Phee swiped at the sheets, grabbing fistfuls and raising the edge to her chest. “Go back to bed, L. Really. Or better still, find Moonlight.”
Luna kept her eyes on Declan as she softly closed the door.
Phee eased herself against the headboard. “How long have you been there?” She rubbed her sternum as if that was going to stop the rushing of her blood.
“Not long.”
She glanced at the clock. Not long, huh? It was 3 a.m. She swiped at her cheek and it came away wet. Great. “I won't be going back to Maxim's if that's what you're worried about.” Hovering over her like a jailor. “So you can stop staring at me.”
He took in a long breath and kept staring. “Do you know the first time I saw you at Maxim's, I thought your hair reminded me of a sunset?”
What was he talking about? “That right?”
“Yes. That was something I'd missed being in prison—seeing the night sky turn colors.”
She rubbed her forehead. “Funny you should say that about my hair. The first time I saw my father in years he was at a place called Sunset Home.”
“But he's not there anymore. Now he's at a halfway house, right?”
She didn't answer. Starr and L. had shared that news with her and she'd tried hard to forget it.
“He won't get near you again.”
Oh, Jesus. Is that what this is all about? She threw off the sheets, heat building in her body as if someone lit a fire within her. She wore sweatpants and a T-shirt. She'd have ripped both off if she was alone.
“No one will ever enter your bedroom without permission ever again.”
Fuck him for raising that topic. “You did.”
He huffed. “Yes, I suppo
se so, but I had witnesses. Luna was with me.”
“Declan, you can go. I'm fine.”
The rocking chair creaked as he pushed himself to standing. “If you say so.”
“Leave that light on, please.” She pointed to the lamp on the table next to the rocking chair—one of the earliest mini-cocktail lamps from Shakedown before they'd most recently renovated. It reminded her of better days when she and her sisters danced and there were no men with guns hanging around or before she knew Declan was really a MacKenna.
Declan fingered his cane. “One more thing. You don't have to worry about Carragh MacKenna, either. Seeing him standing there in the ER waiting room…” His lips firmed. “That won't happen again.”
“I can get with that program.”
He smiled. “Well, look at us. Agreeing on something.”
Truth was they agreed on many things. His love of vintage cars and antique furniture and reading classics would have made him a perfect friend if they'd met in another lifetime.
“The doctor says I have to take two weeks off.” Though what she'd do during that time frame, she had no idea. Maybe find that new dancing gig. The air seemed to grow heavier even thinking of doing such a thing.
“No problem. We'll adjust. What will you do with your time off? And please, tell me you won't be looking for Naomi during that time.”
She stared at the ceiling. “I won't. I'm tired now, Declan.” She rolled to her side to face the far wall. She couldn't look at his handsome face anymore—seeing all the hope and desire for her that, quite frankly, she didn't deserve. She had nothing to give a man like Declan.
“But promise me something?” she asked the wall. “No matter what, you'll see Ruark can't get to Starr ever again. Or to Luna.”
“I'll be in my own grave before I let that happen. Anyone who hurts you hurts me. You have my loyalty, not them. Remember that.”
Her throat clogged, but with some effort, she managed to swallow down the choke. “For the record, I meant what I told Naomi about you being a gentleman.”
Tough Break (The Shakedown Series Book 2) Page 10