by Iliev, Neven
It certainly wasn’t because the thing was moderately shiny or anything.
“Rowana! Keira! Wait up!” Lia shouted from further back.
She stayed behind for a few seconds to see if the distressed pawnbroker was going to be alright, as that little stunt had left him a bit pale. Orym insisted he would be fine after he sat down and had a nap, so Lia left him to it and pursued Keira and Rowana. Luckily, they’d only taken a few steps by the time she got out of the shop.
“Lia! Help me out here!” said both of the lovebirds at once.
“Okay! Let’s take a deep breath, calm down, and think this through. First of all, Keira, how in the blazes did you actually spot that creature?”
The masquerading monster paused for a moment while it threw together a less incriminating response than, ‘I spotted its fleshy insides with my Mana Locator Gland.’
“… I thought I saw it twitch outside the corner of my eye. When I went into the shop, it realized it had this weird smell about it. That’s how I knew it wasn’t a simple box.”
According to Snack’s lessons on common sense, beastkin had sharper senses than elves, so this sort of excuse seemed believable. Okay, maybe it wasn’t airtight, but it was certainly more plausible than saying something like, ‘I just knew’ or, ‘It winked at me.’
“Wait, does it?”
Rowana leaned in and took a sniff of the mini-mimic that Keira pressed against her chest. Although that thing did have a scent of its own, it was overpowered by the catgirl’s slightly sensual ‘musk.’ The elf absentmindedly took a few more sniffs before noticing Lia looking at her weirdly. She forced out an embarrassed cough and straightened herself out.
“So, uh, yeah,” Rowana stammered for a moment. “I’d say ‘weird smell’ sums it up nicely. It’s like this bizarre mix of… dead rat and… hylt fruit?”
Boxxy had to try really hard not to let its relief show on its face, as it had failed to check its odor before blurting out that lie.
“Uh-huh… Anyway, Keira, do you know what that actually is?” Lia inquired.
“It’s a type of mimic, obviously. But it’s different from what I heard they were like.”
“Yeah, you do have a point.”
“What’s a mimic?” asked Rowana, who was clearly out of the loop.
“They’re dungeon-born monsters that usually look like treasure chests,” the other elf explained. “Pretty much all the dungeons in the Republic have them, so they warn us trainees about these things in advance.”
“So, it’s a monster after all, isn’t it? Like, not the sort of thing Keira should adopt as a pet?”
“Errr, maybe?” Lia scratched her cheek. “I mean, the ones I know of are supposed to be big enough to swallow a person whole and have these sharp and jagged teeth. This one seems… a lot less dangerous.”
“How about dropping by the CC to check it out?” Keira suggested. “Surely mister Faehorn or one of the other veterans would know about it.”
“You sure it won’t just attack you?” Rowana kept worrying.
“It’ll be fine,” claimed the green-haired elf. “Keira clearly has a handle on it.”
That was an understatement. While the tiny creature did indeed struggle a bit in Keira’s grip, it was so pathetically weak that even a child would be able to hold it down. Boxxy’s monstrous strength wasn’t even a factor in the situation. Besides, even if it were to somehow slip out and try to bite something, those flat teeth wouldn’t even be able to break the skin. The only way this miniature mimic would kill anyone would be if it fell on them from a great height.
“Well… okay… I’m coming with, though,” Rowana insisted. “If, uh, that’s even allowed. I’m not really sure how things work over there.”
“It’ll be fine, Rowie,” Keira assured her. “We’ll just get you a visitor’s badge, it’ll be fine.”
The trio proceeded towards the Central Consortium building, which was about a twenty-minute walk, much to Lia’s dismay. She wasn’t sure how those two managed it, but they flirted the entire way despite everything that had happened. Being the dreaded third wheel made the junior Ranger feel more than a little uncomfortable, but she was far too curious about that creature’s identity to slip away.
Thankfully, the two lovebirds ceased their cooing when they entered the communal guild headquarters. Inside, they walked into a grand hallway with a staircase at either end of it. Each of the four floors was divided into a north and a south wing, with each of the eight major guilds getting a wing of its own. There were also a few common areas like the library, the cafeteria, and a number of meeting rooms, but the vast majority of each floor belonged to one guild or another.
The trio stopped by the front desk to get Rowana a visitor’s badge, then went up the Hidden Arrow guild’s offices on north wing of the second floor. Unfortunately, none of the high-ranking members, including instructors, were in since some big meeting or conference demanded their attention. This was also why Keira and Lia’s Ranger classes had been called off today.
Not to be discouraged, they visited the guild on the opposite side of the same floor—the Children of the Wild. Rangers and Rogues meshed well with nature-oriented Jobs, so the two organizations usually got along well. The Blessed of Nyrie and the Maleficum on the third floor, however, had a bit of a strained relationship to say the least. Given their respective specialties, it was like having an underground thieves’ guild taking up residence opposite a courthouse. Nobody was sure how this arrangement had come to be, but everyone agreed that the person responsible for it was probably fired.
Regardless of inter-guild politics, Keira’s group lucked out with their visit to the Children of the Wild, as a Level 63 Monster Tamer was available for a consultation right away. They all pitched in for the 40 GP consultation fee and the guild’s clerk directed them to one of the shared meeting rooms. The girls found the room to be a bit bare, but spacious and comfortable. The walls were a soothing cream color and lacked decoration beyond the curtains. Three tall windows allowed plenty of natural light, while a large rectangular table sat in the middle with nearly twenty seats lined up around.
The three girls waited rather nervously, with Keira still hanging onto the mini-mimic. The creature seemed to realize it wasn’t about to get squished and it was already aware it wouldn’t be able to get away, so it had stopped squirming. At least that was what Boxxy assumed. It tried to slacken its grip on it, as if daring the creature to escape. The animate box did not take the bait, opting instead to just sit motionless and dead silent. Now, this thing didn’t have a face to read, but the shapeshifter got the odd sensation that the thing wasn’t sitting still because of fear, but awe.
The door swung open, and a bald gnome wearing a bushy black beard and a dark brown tunic walked in. He introduced himself as Jeremy Rizzlecrank, the Monster Tamer they asked for. The girls gave him their names in kind.
“Now, then,” he said, clapping his hands together expectantly. “Let’s see this peculiar beastie you found.”
Keira got off her seat and placed the ‘beastie’ on the ground. The box continued to remain motionless, even after it was freed from its captor’s grasp. Rather than ask questions, Jeremy grabbed onto it and forced its lid open. The creature finally started squirming and whining as it had before, but didn’t resist or make trouble while the gnome inspected its mouth cavity. It wouldn’t have been able to stop the guy even if it tried anything, anyway.
“Hmm, teeth like that of an herbivore, tongue similar to a frog’s…”
Jeremy let go of the box, which closed its jaws and shuffled around a bit, making some mild yipping sounds in the process. The gnome took off his leather glove and poked at its mouth and teeth with an unprotected finger, seemingly trying to provoke it. Tt didn’t bite or attack the gnome, though it gave his finger a few licks before backing off while making retching sounds.
“Doesn’t seem particularly aggressive either,” the Monster Tamer mumbled.
He reached into
a pouch on his waist and pulled out a jar that looked far too big to fit into it. That pouch was a Bag of Holding, a popular Superior-quality magic item. It could be anywhere between ten and fifty times bigger on the inside, and items stored within would feel up to four times lighter than they normally were. Boxxy had encountered these magic items before, but it wasn’t all that interested in them. They were expensive, un-shiny, and it already had access to a superior storage method.
The gnome twisted open the lid of the jar and took out what appeared to be a dried piece of peach, then presented it to the strangely docile mimic. The creature immediately stretched its tongue out, snatched the tasty treat out of his hand, and happily munched on it. It let out an excited, ‘Yip!’ which prompted the gnome to feed it two more pieces of dried fruit.
“What you folks have here is a house mimic,” he declared with a smile on his face. “Quite the rare thing you’ve found there. Not many of them left.”
“So… it’s not dangerous?” asked Rowana with a bit of apprehension.
“Nah, no more dangerous than a puppy or kitty. It’s not even a monster, not in the truest sense of the word.”
He lightly patted the jewelry box on the lid as it happily munched on its snacks to prove a point. The house mimic didn’t shrink back or flinch this time.
“It’s actually pretty cute, if you ask me.”
“Yeah, guess it is.”
Though Rowana was apprehensive at first, she had to admit it was strangely endearing.
“So, can we keep it?” Keira asked with a face full of expectation.
“I don’t know… How would we even care for that thing?”
“Ah, that’s easy really,” said Jeremy. “These buggers mostly care for themselves. They don’t poop or shed, and will eat pretty much anything, so long as it’s a fruit or vegetable. They’ll sometimes hunt bugs, rats, or other small vermin if they get really hungry. They like hylt fruits the most. Fresh ones are best, but dried works too.”
“You sure seem to know a lot about them,” Lia pointed out.
“Truth be told, I got one of my own back home, although mine’s in the shape of a cookie jar. Found it three years ago while looking into some missing rations. Been keeping each other company ever since. As for this little guy, seems he was a bit starved and was trying to conserve energy by hibernating.”
He fed the decidedly-more-energetic box a few more pieces of fruit before putting away the jar.
“So yeah, they make for interesting pets, but they’re kinda stupid. Don’t expect them to learn any tricks or something, and definitely don’t count on them for home security. Not only are they all cowards, but their jaws are so weak they won’t even draw blood if they tried to bite a burglar. Which they won’t. The most they’d do is make a whole lot of noise.”
He then gently picked the animate box and tickled its underside, which caused it to let out an odd purr-like noise.
“Oh, and their bottoms are sensitive, so while they like having them stroked, they’ll get mad if you overdo it.”
“Oh look, sweetie. Something you two have in common,” said Rowana with a coy smile.
“Rowie!”
“Sweet Nyrie. Not this again,” Lia grumbled, exasperated.
“So yeah, if you guys don’t wanna keep it, I’ll gladly take it off your hands,” offered Jeremy, who graciously ignored the couple’s exchange.
“We’ll keep it! Definitely keeping it! Right, Rowie?!” Keira enthusiastically asked.
“Jeremy, can you promise me it’s safe?”
“I swear on my life, miss Slyth.”
“… Okay then. I’ll trust your judgment on this.”
“Alright! Thanks, Rowie! You’re the best!”
Following Keira’s excitable character, Boxxy threw its arms around the elf and gave her a wet smack on the lips. This was much to Lia’s discomfort and Jeremy’s shock.
“Keira!” Rowana pushed the catgirl off.
“Ah… sorry… I got carried away…”
“So um, Jeremy, please don’t… I mean-”
“Fret not, miss Slyth. I’m a professional, and what happens in this room is strictly confidential. Besides, I’m not in the business of spreading salacious rumors.”
“Thanks.”
“Anyway, I suggest you folks get the little guy tagged and have him registered. You can do both of those at my guild’s office.”
“Uhm, mister Rizzlecrank? Can you recommend some books on mimics? Or just shapeshifters in general?”
“Oh ho, good attitude, miss Morgana! Knowing everything one’s pet is rather crucial if you wanna take care of them, especially in the case of magical critters like your square pal here.”
Well, that wasn’t actually the reason Boxxy asked for those. If anything, it was already an expert on the matter of mimics. It just that it wanted to know what the world at large knew about its kind, lest it reveal too much information in the future.
“Check the library for volume three of Riften’s Monster Encyclopedia. It should have the info you need. Word of warning though, there’s some dark history attached to the whole mimic thing,” the gnome added.
“Okay, thanks!”
“Sure thing. Do drop by if you have any more questions. I’ll answer them free of charge, of course.”
“We’ll take you up on that offer when the time comes,” said Rowana with a business-like smile.
The former mimic picked up its smaller ‘cousin’ and the three girls parted ways with the gnome.
“So, what are you guys gonna call it?” Lia asked on the way to get it registered.
“… How about… Goldie?” Rowana suggested.
“I don’t know that’s a little… common?” the other elf shrugged.
“… Shiny?”
“That’s just puerile, Rowana.”
“Maybe… Oh, I know! Red Eye!”
“What, after the gem in its lid? Is that real, by the way?”
“I don’t know, but it’s rather pretty.”
“Anyway, ‘Red Eye’ isn’t bad, but makes it sound a lot more vicious than it appears.”
“Minic,” Keira confidently declared.
“… I’m sorry?” Lia asked dumbly.
“It’s a mini-mimic, so I’m gonna call it Minic!”
“That… I’m not sure if that’s genius or idiotic,” the younger elf shook her head.
“I think Minic sounds cute. Let’s go with that,” offered the older one.
The catgirl held the living jewelry box up above her head and gave it a wide smile.
“Pleasure to meet you, Minic!”
“Yap yap!”
The house mimic had perked up considerably after its meal. It let out a few high-pitched, almost bark-like sounds in response. Its soon-to-be-owners took it into the Children of the Wild’s office and, with Jeremy’s assistance, made its name official. A Scribe performed some kind of naming ceremony, engraving the critter’s name onto its Status. She then gave the couple a set of tags on a string meant to identify their pet’s owner as Keira Morgana. The girls thanked the clerk and then dropped by the library to check out the book their gnomish consultant had suggested. Eager to learn more, they all gathered around a table inside and looked up the entry on house mimics.
According to volume three of Riften’s Monster Encyclopedia, house mimics were the original mimics, predating their more violent dungeon-born counterparts by several decades. House mimics had apparently been created roughly four and a half centuries ago by Ivran Tol-Saroth, one of the greatest scholars to have ever lived. An exceptionally gifted Enchanter, Alchemist, Druid, and Warlock, he had used some unknown combination of eldritch and natural magic to breathe life into his furniture. A man of extreme solitude, he had created hundreds of house mimics to be his companions, assistants, and servants.
These critters had been born of good intentions and were innocent in their purpose. In fact, they had a powerful aversion to violence that prevented them from ever harming another sent
ient being, barring the occasional annoying vermin. Though that gnome called them cowards, it was far more accurate to say there were hardcore pacifists—creatures that would not attack another even if their lives depended on it. They were so far removed from the dungeon mimics of today, that both Keira and Lia couldn’t help but start digging around the library to figure out how those violent boxes had come into existence.
That was how and why they learned of the dark history Jeremy had warned them about.
The Elven Dominion—the Ishigar Republic’s predecessor at the time of Tol-Saroth—had been to blame for the violent ‘deviation’ of house mimics. Apparently, Queen Vasya the Last had made the phenomenal mistake of ordering the great sage to assist in her country’s fight against the then-fledgling Lodrak Empire. This was a demand Tol-Saroth had refused outright. He had been an old and feeble man at the time, and had decided that spending his twilight years in peace and comfort was more important than appeasing the whims of some pompous monarch.
The queen had not taken this response lightly, and had retaliated by unleashing the power of a Phantasmal-grade magic item known as the Authority of the Crown. This immensely powerful, orb-shaped relic had been passed down from one member of the royal bloodline to the next. It bestowed upon its royal wielder ultimate power over any citizen of the Dominion. Queen Vasya had used this arcane relic to place a geas on Tol-Saroth that compelled him to obey her commands.
His free will stripped away, the once-great sage had been reduced to a mindless drone that slaved away to turn his peace-loving pets into tools of war. Dubbing them ‘war mimics’ (the old man had apparently been terrible at naming things) these alchemically-engineered monstrosities were designed to be merciless killing machines that craved human flesh. The thoughtless creatures would hibernate for extended periods of time, during which they would have the appearance of sturdy-yet-plain furniture.
The elf queen’s spies would then smuggle these dormant killers into Imperial settlements. Once they had awoken from their slumbers, these war mimics would indiscriminately kill civilians. They had apparently been such formidable fighters a single one reportedly caused casualties in the hundreds, sometimes thousands, before they were finally killed or driven off. The whole thing had been a heartless campaign of terror that the queen hoped would crush the Empire’s will to fight.