by Lavinia Kent
Her eyes traced down that long back, lingering on the high curves of his behind. Her gaze moved back up, wishing he would turn his head so that she could see more than the hint of a carved cheekbone.
All so familiar and yet she wasn’t sure she’d ever seen him before. If she had, she would have remembered him. What was it about him?
She pressed her thighs tight, even as she tried to step forward, to step toward him. Her body seemed to have forgotten how to move. It felt as if it had melted into a hot pool of need.
How the hell could some guy’s ass be having this effect on her?
She took another small step, her heels digging into the lawn. What should she say? It had been so long since she’d flirted and she didn’t think it was like riding a bike. She had definitely forgotten the moves. Although she was pretty sure that telling him she thought his ass might be the best one she’d ever seen was not the proper way to start a conversation.
Before her brain could move beyond that point, he raised a hand and waved to someone out on the lawn, probably a woman. He grabbed a couple of champagne flutes and headed away with steady purpose, his walk powerful and assertive, clearly a man who knew his own worth.
Part of her wanted to stride after him, but an even larger part rejoiced that she had been saved. That today was not the day she needed to change her life.
And that, she thought, was the far more sensible part. She turned away looking again for the Petersens.
A smart woman did not fall in love, or even lust, merely from staring at a man’s butt. Her body was playing tricks on her. If she’d seen his face the tingles probably would have disappeared. Still, maybe it did mean that it was time for her to get her groove back.
Chapter 2
“You look beautiful, energized. What are you doing differently? Or is it simply my dragging you out of that stuffy old house,” Veronica asked as she rose to greet Jordan.
Jordan felt a flush of color rising on her cheeks. She wasn’t going to talk about the fantasies she’d been having about a man’s backside—and how satisfying they had been. That sounded stupid. No, I don’t know who he is or what he looks like but thinking about his ass gives me the best orgasms of my life. Nope, that was not going to happen. “My house is anything but stuffy and you know it.”
Veronica just looked at her and smiled slightly.
Jordan took her seat. “This is a really cute place. I can’t believe I’ve never been here. How long has it been open?” She glanced about. The restaurant was not as crowded as it would have been a week earlier, when it had still officially been the summer season, but it was still full. As long as the weather was good everyone wanted to cling to summer and fun. She continued to look about. The mix of people had changed. Far more locals and fewer summer people. Still, she knew almost everybody, by face if not name.
She turned back to Veronica, who was looking at her, saying nothing, not answering her attempt at distraction. It was an old technique, but one that always worked. Veronica was a master of waiting.
She let out a slight sigh. “Fine. I’ve been thinking about what you said, and you’re right. I do need to get out more and…” She let her voice trail off as she looked about.
“And…” Veronica was not going to let it go so easily.
“And, yes, I do need to find a man. I’m ready to think about a relationship.”
Veronica snorted. “I didn’t say anything about a relationship. You just need to get laid.”
Jordan felt her jaw drop and rather thought that those of the women at the next table had also. She looked away. Veronica knew her well, knew her dislike of being a spectacle. Why was she…? “I really don’t think this is the place…”
Veronica took a sip of water, grinned slightly. “And what is the place? Don’t look at me like that. I’m just speaking the truth.”
“You’re just trying to shock me, like always. You make me feel like we’re back in high school.”
“You mean like when I explained to you what a blowjob was and how little actual blowing was involved? I swear you thought it was like playing a flute. And you’re right. I’m deliberately trying to shake you up. I think you need something to unsettle you, to get you out of your comfort zone.”
Could her cheeks get any hotter and could the women at the next table make it any clearer that they were listening avidly? She was only glad that she didn’t know them by name, even if she had a bad feeling she’d seen them on the occasions that she went to church. “And you think this is it? Besides, I couldn’t help it if I didn’t get out much.” Veronica knew all this, but some things might need to be repeated. “And it wasn’t like I had any need of the information. I was too busy studying and working to ever have time for boys. You know I had my first real kiss at thirteen and didn’t get another for four years.”
“Ah, Tommy Johnson. He was quite the bad boy.” Veronica turned as the waiter came, and they quickly placed an order for salads and wine.
Jordan was glad for the moment of reprieve. Veronica seemed happy to sit back quietly as they waited for their wine to arrive.
But the moment it was there…“Did you hear what Tommy’s doing now? He teaches second grade over in Middle Harbor. Can you imagine him in his torn jeans and band T-shirts, trying to be respectable?”
“I’m sure he’s different now.”
“Maybe you should look him up. If he did it for you then, maybe he still would.”
“I don’t think so.” Jordan took a hurried sip of the rosé.
“What you really mean is, even all these years later you haven’t forgiven him for kissing you silly and then going out with Mary Jo Smith the next day. And you know he only did it because she put out on the first date.”
Another gulp of wine. “We don’t know if that’s true. It might just have been rumor.” And she was certainly not going to judge someone on gossip. She’d been at the center of enough of it when she married Mark. “Besides, it was a long time ago. I’m a different woman than I was then and I don’t know that I’d find the same things attractive. And I’m sure Tommy has his own life. He’s probably married.”
Veronica nodded at the possibility. “Still, we do need to find you somebody. I’m going to have to start going through my contacts.”
“That’s not necessary. I don’t want to date someone you’ve already gone out with.”
“I wasn’t planning that, although if you did then I could tell you if he’s good or not. You don’t want to invest time on dinner just to find out some guy has a tiny dick.”
And the women at the next table were listening again. Jordan glared at Veronica. “I hardly think that’s what’s important to me.”
“I’ll assume from that statement that your husband had quite a nice one. If he didn’t, you’d know just how important it is. Mark is the only man you’ve ever slept with, isn’t he?”
It was all Jordan could do not to spit her wine. “I’m not going to discuss penises with you. And certainly not my husband’s. And as for my sex life, it’s none of your business.” She set down her glass. “Why are you being this way?”
“Shocking?”
“No, I know you love to shock people. It’s part of who you are, but…you’re being a little unfriendly.”
Veronica’s face softened. “I’m sorry. You are right. I’m just trying to push you and push you hard. You need something to get you up and moving. And I’m right. What you need is a really good fuck. I promise that once you’ve had one, the world will be a brighter place.”
Jordan glanced to the left. The women weren’t even pretending not to listen anymore. “I wish you would stop talking like that. At least here.”
Veronica looked serious, but still with a bit of a grin. “And what do you want me to say, to bump the uglies, a good bang, a boinking, or…? I don’t think you’re actually ready to make love. What you need is something hot
and physical.”
And now her ears were red. She could feel the blood rising to the top of her scalp. She leaned forward, elbows on the table. “Please stop.”
Veronica took a big bite of salad, crunched the lettuce loudly. “Promise we can talk about it?”
Jordan shook her head. This was pure Veronica. It was why she loved her even as she despaired. “I can agree that I need to do something, but I’m not sure that we need to talk about it. And I’m not sure that it’s sex. I do want other things in life, you know?”
“I know. I just think sex is the place to start and I have a feeling that if we don’t talk, you won’t ever actually do something.”
Jordan leaned forward. “I will. I do have needs and I admit that I’d prefer to not always take care of them myself. I just don’t need to share with women I only see at church.” She nodded to the other table.
Veronica couldn’t hold back a snort. “Really? At church?” She snorted again. “Sorry. Sorry. But it is funny.” She glanced over at the women, who finally looked away. “I almost wish I’d planned this. But I do feel that if I help you work out some of your embarrassment then everything else will be easier.”
“I’m not sure that’s a good plan. You’re actually making me wonder if I ever want to be seen in public again.”
Veronica paused, her face growing solemn. “I understand why you feel that way, after what you’ve been through, but you need to get over it, to move.”
“I’m not so sure that’s true.” Jordan remembered well how many times she’d faced embarrassment and discomfort in the years right after marrying Mark, back when she’d never been sure which fork to use or understood which Caribbean islands were the best to vacation on. Back when she was conscious of having only finished high school, of never feeling quite good enough, quite smart enough, quiet educated enough. Although at some point she’d done her best to stop caring, to convince herself that she’d learned and adapted. She knew it was silly to be bothered by such things, but it was hard to remember that when someone was staring. She turned and looked back at the women. “I’m not sure that I’ll ever think it’s a good idea to talk about…about fucking in public.”
Veronica sputtered.
The women at the next table turned back to their food, smirking.
Jordan leaned forward again, wishing she truly could not care. “Okay, that did feel good and perhaps freeing. I know it’s silly to worry so much about other people’s opinions. But it’s not just embarrassment that keeps me from talking that way. I’ve never really enjoyed being vulgar.”
“Vulgar. You sound like my grandmother. Well, actually not my grandmother, she did tend to curse, but someone’s grandmother. And I do basically agree with you about language, but sometimes such words are called for and I think today’s a perfect example. I got exactly what I wanted. And didn’t it feel good to say?”
It had, but she wasn’t a hundred percent sure she wanted to admit that or that she would still feel good about it later. “I’m far from a grandmother, although I don’t exactly feel young anymore. But you might be right, some change could be good for me. I’ll work at how to go about it.”
“What, are you going to get a planner? I think you need to be spontaneous. What happened to the girl I knew in high school who was up for anything?”
“I think you’re thinking about somebody else. All I remember is rushing to work right after school and then staying up late to finish my homework. I would never have even met Mark if he hadn’t had a dead battery.”
“That’s not quite how I remember it.”
“Think again. I admit I had some fun, but mostly it was work. And you complained about it even then. You never understood why I had to work instead of going to the beach every day in the summer.”
“Okay, that’s true. I just remember the great times we had when you did take time off, when you let yourself live. You can’t deny we had fun.”
Jordan let her face soften. “Yes, we had lots of fun and you were always there for me. I knew I could depend on you and you’ve stuck with me all these years.”
“And the fact that that’s true is all the more reason you need to get out and have some fun. Let me set you up with someone.”
“Who are you thinking of?”
“I haven’t actually decided on anybody yet.”
“Not somebody from Forbidden Cove.”
“Are you sure? I’ve seen several men giving you the look.”
Part of her wanted to scream “Who?” but if she was going to be out looking just for fun, it was not going to be with anyone she already knew. “Somebody from the city. You must know men at your law firm.”
“You want a lawyer?” Veronica’s voice rang with disbelief.
“Why not? I like you.”
“Okay. I mean, there are some nice ones. They’re not all like my father.”
Ah, maybe she could change the subject. “What’s he done now?”
Veronica narrowed her eyes. “I’m not falling for that. He’s just the same as always. It’s just hard working for him. Tell me more about what you like in a man.”
“I haven’t told you anything yet.”
“Yeah, but I knew Mark. You like a kind man who’ll take care of you. And older.”
She certainly couldn’t deny the first part, but who wouldn’t want that. “I don’t really care about age. I liked Mark because he was Mark. I like tall. I know that shouldn’t matter, but I like somebody bigger than me.” And I like a nice firm butt, but she wasn’t going to say that. Besides, it was only that one backside that filled her mind each night as she drifted off to sleep. And it wasn’t just the behind itself, it was the way everything had fit together, the way he’d walked, confidence in every step, the long legs, the broad shoulders leading down to narrow hips, the…
“Now what has you blushing?”
She blushed again, trying to clear her thoughts. “I guess I’m embarrassed that looks matter. But if I’m doing this for fun, I want somebody hot.”
“And what is hot in your mind?”
“I’m not sure I trust you.”
Veronica took a sip of wine, leaned forward. “Come on, you can whisper. You know I’ll never tell.”
“Have you seen the Warwick Rowers calendar?”
“The what?”
“It’s this rowing club in England that puts out a calendar and—”
Veronica’s brows lifted. “The naked one.”
Jordan looked down. “Yes, that one.”
“They are hot, though perhaps a little young. But those long, lean, muscular bodies…The thighs on them…”
“Stop or I’ll be sorry I told you.”
Veronica sat back. Looked sideways at the next table, where the women were clearly straining to hear. “I don’t blame you and it definitely gives me an idea of your type. And strangely enough I can see that when Mark was young he might have looked like that, too.”
Jordan only nodded. She had no intention of discussing Mark’s body with anyone. “I don’t think you need to do this. I’ll find somebody on my own. The foundation has a bunch of meetings and a small conference at the beginning of the month, so I’ll be heading into the city more often. And if I’m just looking for someone fun…”
“I still think you should let me set you up. I’ll be traveling for a bit, but I can manage it even then. Maybe one of those nights when you’re in the city.” Then she leaned in and grinned naughtily. “Now, you have to tell me how you discovered the Warwick Rowers calendar. Do you actually own one?”
Chapter 3
Well, that had certainly not been worth her time. Jordan sighed as she walked into the elegant lobby of her hotel. Her date had been just as Veronica had described him and yet…He’d been nothing at all like she’d expected.
Yes, he was tall.
Y
es, he was lean and fit.
Yes, he was basically handsome.
Yes, he worked at Veronica’s firm.
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
And yet—no.
She’d been ready to leave before she finished her first glass of wine. And that had been before he’d started talking about tax law and asking all types of questions about her foundation. Questions that she had no idea how to answer. She knew enough about how the foundation ran and how the money was spent, but she had no knowledge of exactly how all the details of the charity worked and whether every contribution was structured in such a way as to avoid any tax liability. She cared about the good that it did, the families it helped. Yes, she wanted to be sure that every penny possible went to a good cause, but that was why she’d hired accountants. She might not always understand business, but her staff did.
Was that why she’d been so frustrated with the date? Because John had made her feel each and every one of her insecurities? Rather than making her feel she could do even more, he’d had her feeling she should do less, that she should hurry home to rest her fragile feminine mind. No, that wasn’t fair to him, she didn’t actually think he was sexist. His comments simply had hit all her sore spots, made her feel that it was she who was the problem, that a poor little girl who’d never done anything but be a wife, who’d certainly never gone to college, should never be so ambitious as to set up A Place for Family. She should let others run it and not worry her pretty little head about it.
Which was actually what she did. She’d known from the start what she wanted it to do and that she needed to hire others to actually do it. So why did John’s comments make her feel like a failure and at the same time make her want to do more, make her determined to do more, make her determined to start on some of her plans?
She could be whatever she wanted. She just had to keep telling herself that.
She walked up the marble stairs to the elevator, smiled at the bellman, pushed the button and stared at her hazy reflection in the shiny brass door.