Tom placed a hand on her shoulder, and she looked up at him. He handed her a bottle of water. She smiled and took a sip.
“You should sleep for a bit.” He offered her his hand to help her walk across the room. “You’re still exhausted.”
She nodded absentmindedly, her mind trying to untangle what was going on. She considered what she knew: she’d blacked out, lost time.
Was she repressing traumatic memories?
As a nurse she’d encountered patients who couldn’t remember the traumas they’d experienced. Dissociative amnesia was rare and incredibly difficult to treat.
When she was sixteen, her first boyfriend had broken up with her by mocking her and telling her to leave, and she’d been found wandering through the woods behind his house hours later with no memory of how she got there.
And then there was Lester’s death.
It was so long ago. The memory distant, muddled. She’d spoken to Tom after her night shift before entering her bedroom where she’d found Lester already cold—blood-soaked sheets stark against his white skin. She couldn’t remember the hours that followed, and it had been late afternoon by the time Tom had knocked on the door.
She still couldn’t say why she’d been locked in a bedroom with her dead husband.
Was her brain hiding a traumatic experience behind a thick curtain? At times it felt as though she’d been wrapped in cotton wool, blissfully unaware of what was going on outside her cocoon.
The brain was an organ so complex, researchers were still puzzling over how it worked.
“What are you thinking about?” Tom asked. “You look worried.”
Chris let out a long sigh and shrugged. “Nothing really. How curious the brain is, I guess.” She gave him a tired smile. “You’re right. I should sleep. Tomorrow is going to be a long day.”
You can’t run from me, Maggie whispered, but Chris ignored her.
Before long, she’d find a way to silence the voices inside her head for good.
5
Sarah and Rachel were making blackberry jam in a big saucepan over smouldering coals in the fireplace, their mouths and hands smeared black with berry juice.
Their giggling made Anna smile. She was on the sofa, resting her knee for a few moments, elevating her leg with the help of two pillows. She sorely missed having ice in the freezer, but she didn’t want to say that out loud for fear that she would jinx the upcoming winter months.
The last thing they needed was for the vegetable garden to freeze for several months and frost to kill their crop.
Rachel peered out of the window at the sun. It was about to disappear behind the neighbouring houses, the surrounding sky a vivid orange.
Red sky at night, shepherd’s delight, her mother had said whenever little Anna had pointed at the sky in awe of the colours.
But the colours weren’t what Rachel was worried about. “Shouldn’t Bob be back by now?”
Standing by the window looking out over the gate at the back of the house, Sue nodded grimly. “He’s never this late.” She approached the kitchen counter and reached for Sarah’s planner. “May I have a look?”
“Go ahead.”
Sue squinted, attempting to decipher Sarah’s scribbles and Anna felt laughter bubbling up in her chest at the sight. It would be a miracle if Sue managed to decode her sister’s handwriting, which had left many a teacher’s nerves frazzled.
Worse than a doctor’s, her mother used to say, sounding almost proud, as if illegible handwriting could turn her daughter into an actual doctor one day.
Noticing Sue’s scowl, Sarah blushed and took the book from her. “What do you want to know?”
“Is Bob supposed to take a watch tonight? He’s never this late when he has to stay up.”
“No. That’s tomorrow.”
Worry creased Sue’s forehead as she turned to look at Rachel. “What are we going to do? We’ll never find him. He walks twenty ridiculous miles every time he goes out. He could be anywhere…”
“Didn’t he mention he was going to change his route?” Anna bit her lip, realising she had just added to Sue’s worries.
A small groan escaped Sue’s lips and she dragged her fingers through her hair. Pacing in front of the kitchen counter, her scowl deepened, and her mutterings grew louder.
“Did he take one of the guns with him?” Rachel asked, and Sue nodded.
“Don’t worry. He’s probably just found an abandoned house and is bringing home supplies.”
Anna considered their options. It would take them almost five hours to search Bob’s route, and the sun was beginning to set. “Where is Luke?”
“He’s…” Sarah skimmed over the page and frowned.
Sue strode back to the window to look outside. “I should have said no. I should have stopped him from going out there alone every day, but he’s so stubborn.”
Rachel placed a hand on Sue’s arm, which earned her a glare. She mumbled an apology, then added, “We’ll find him,” in an entirely unconvincing tone. She cleared her throat and slumped onto the sofa next to Anna.
“This is Pyro Neil’s doing, isn’t it?” Sue spat. “Who has the second gun?” She glowered at Sarah as if the woman with the schedule somehow had all the answers. “I should have told that man to get lost.”
“Sue,” Anna said. “We don’t know what happened. You’re panicking. That isn’t helping.”
“I doubt Neil has abducted Bob,” Rachel said.
“He’s never this late. He should have been back hours ago, and I told myself to keep calm, but now…”
“It’s Graham’s watch,” Sarah said. “He has the second gun.”
Anna straightened her back. “Are we heading out to find Bob? If so, I don’t feel comfortable with both weapons gone. If we take Oreo with us, the other gun can stay here.” She took a moment to acknowledge how weird it felt to say those words. Three months ago, she didn’t know anything about firearms apart from them needing ammunition and having a trigger you had to pull.
Now she knew how to load a pistol, release the safety and fire it. She knew how to stand, how to aim and most importantly, she was prepared to actually use it.
Sarah lifted a hand as if to object, but Anna shook her head, and she dropped it again.
Anna grabbed her sister’s notebook and bit her lip. “I have to go because I’ve been training with Oreo, and I trust that he’ll keep me safe. Besides, we walked with Bob a few times, and I know his route. But I must admit, I’d feel safer with one of the men by my side, and Luke is—” She blinked, looking up at Luke who had seemingly—right at that moment—materialised in the door to the garden.
He put a hand on his hip and raised an eyebrow. “Go on. And Luke is…?”
Her cheeks burning, Anna knew she was as red as a tomato. “I—”
“Yes?” He shifted and crossed his arms over his chest, but Anna caught the glimmer of amusement in his eyes.
“I was just going to say that Graham is almost a foot taller than you, and I think he looks a bit more intimidating but…”
Oreo sniffed Luke’s trouser pocket, nudging him with his nose. Luke absentmindedly tossed an apple chip and Oreo caught it in the air. “But…?”
“I didn’t mean to offend you,” Anna mumbled, and Luke burst out laughing.
Startled, Oreo looked up, his ears flat against his head. He gave an uncertain bark, and Luke reached out to stroke him before crossing the living room and placing a hand on Anna’s shoulder. “Don’t worry. I agree. Graham is a beast.”
“Does anyone know which way Bob went today?” Sarah asked.
Sue shook her head. “I don’t think he would have changed his route, not without giving us at least some idea of where he was going.” She appeared more confident now that concrete plans were being made. Looking at Sarah she said, “I’m in the middle of dehydrating the rabbit meat, and I need your help after you’re done with the jam. Luke can keep watch, and Rose can do the usual afternoon chores. That frees up Graham
to go with Anna.”
Rachel rolled up her sleeves. “I’ll go with Graham and Anna. The jam is almost ready.”
“That sounds like a sensible plan,” Anna said.
The entire horizon was now a deep orange with specks of pink and yellow. Anna packed her torch, her Swiss Army Knife and some apple chips for Oreo.
Sarah hugged her warmly and whispered, “Take care of yourself.”
“I’m not that worried,” Anna admitted quietly. “You know Bob. He’s found something and lost track of time. Keep an eye on Pyro Neil’s house.” Then, after a moment’s consideration, she added, “And on Sue.”
Rachel and Sue were far less affectionate with each other in their goodbyes. Their relationship seemed to be of a teasing nature more so than a supportive one.
Rachel squeezed her sister’s hand as she walked past her and gave her a nod. “We’ll find him.”
Ten minutes later, they left the garden through the gate at the back and fought their way through the thicket growing between the copse of trees, retracing Bob’s steps. Anna flattened thorny bushes with her shoes so Oreo could pass without hurting his paws. Using a stick, she moved a long branch out of their way. After a few minutes, they emerged on the other side and followed the public footpath in the direction of Braintree.
“This is Bob’s old route,” Anna said. “Oreo and I walked it with him a few times. I agree with Sue. I don’t think he’d change his route without telling us where he was going.”
“I hope not,” Rachel said. “But it’s Bob…”
Anna smiled. She liked that Bob, albeit a bit chaotic, was dependable and true to his word. It was the reason why she trusted him.
But what if he had changed his route without telling anyone and was ambushed and is lying dead—
No.
They’d find him.
It was too early to think about him bleeding out in a ditch somewhere.
Anna shielded her eyes with her hand and looked across the field. “I don’t understand why no one else has taken him up on his offer to join our settlement. He was leaving flyers left and right for a while.”
Graham gave a disapproving grunt, but Anna wasn’t sure if he disagreed with the flyers or if he was trying to convey a more general feeling of disapproval regarding the people who ignored the chance of joining their settlement.
Rachel shrugged. “People are inherently suspicious of others, especially when strangers are offering them kindness.”
Oreo ran ahead, pausing every now and then to look back and check if they were still following.
“Where is Bob? Find Bob.” Anna called out to him, and he ran off, his tail wagging. “I should have taught him to find us. He used to find his toys. He knew them by name, and I would hide them all over my flat.”
“Make that your next project.” Graham lifted the binoculars hanging from his neck to his eyes and scanned the horizon. “Better now than never.” He lowered them, blinked and wiped his eyes with his free hand.
“I suppose I could teach him hide and seek. It can’t hurt, and it’ll tire him out.”
Taking another look through his binoculars, Graham frowned. “How far are we going?”
“I’d say we do the entire loop,” Rachel said. “I’d rather not go back without Bob. Sue might kill me.”
They continued walking along the path. Dusk was setting in and the sky was losing its colour.
Rachel nudged Anna’s ribs with her elbow. “So, tell us…how is it going with Luke?” She waggled her eyebrows suggestively.
Anna grimaced. “Why is everyone watching us as if we were insects under a microscope?”
Rachel snorted.
“If you must know…I like him, but I haven’t asked him if he likes me. There are only eight of us. It’s not like I can move away and forget about any embarrassment if he says no. I live in his spare room…” Anna rubbed her face and groaned at the thought of the inevitable awkwardness that would follow a rejection.
“I’ve seen the way he looks at you,” Rachel said. “He’s probably thinking the exact same thing.”
Graham nodded. “You should tell him. You never know. I mean, here we are, trying to survive an apocalypse. What do you have to lose?” He pushed a strand of hair from his forehead before looking through the binoculars again. “Never wait. Not when it comes to matters of the heart.”
You don’t seem to have a lot of sense. Hopefully I can change that before it’s too late, her father’s voice piped up in her mind and Anna flinched.
While his voice had often haunted her, she hadn’t heard it since he died two months ago. Her entire life he’d made her believe that she wasn’t worthy of love.
Shut up, you’re dead, she replied sternly, pushing the memories of him to the back of her mind. “Never wait when it comes to matters of the heart. Is that how you won Rose’s heart?”
Graham huffed. “Oh, you don’t want to know how I won Rose’s heart.”
“Why not?” Rachel asked.
“Firstly, I didn’t win her heart, she won mine, and secondly, I’m not the hero of this story.” Graham opened his backpack and pulled out a Tupperware container. “Sue gave me these before we set out. I think they’re sandwiches.” He opened it and sniffed the contents. “You’re both such good cooks, and Sarah of course. Better than Bob.”
“Bob knows how to barbecue,” Rachel said. “But he should leave the rest of the cooking to Sue.”
Anna took a bite of her sandwich. It tasted of fresh mayonnaise and she almost moaned in happiness as the flavours filled her mouth. “So, how did Rose win your heart?”
“And here I thought I could distract the two of you with food.” Graham chuckled. “We went to school together, and she helped me with my homework. After a few months of meeting up like that, she invited me to dinner at her parents’ house. Well, manor…” He sighed.
Rachel scowled. “Let me guess. You weren’t good enough for them?”
“Exactly that. After they found out that I was a builder’s son, they told her she could do better.”
Anna whistled for Oreo to stop and wait. “That’s awful.” She tossed Oreo an apple chip before telling him to go and find Bob. He sniffed the ground like a truffle pig. “And then?”
“Rose ignored her parents’ advice and went out with me.”
Rachel’s steps faltered, and she lifted an eyebrow. “You said you weren’t the hero of this story. What did you do?”
“When they told her she was grounded, I egged her parents’ house and slashed the tyres of their Bentley.” Graham rubbed the nape of his neck where the strap of his binoculars had left a red mark. “I’m not proud of it.”
Anna chuckled. “How old were you?”
“Seventeen.”
“And still Rose married you…wait, she does know, right?”
Graham ran a hand through his tousled hair and nodded. “She convinced her parents not to press charges, but I had to pay for the tyres.”
Rachel pursed her lips, studying Graham as they trudged across an empty field. Anna had just decided to steer the discussion in a different direction when Oreo gave a loud bark. Concerned, she looked up, but darkness had fallen, and she couldn’t spot him.
Whistling, she quickened her pace. Oreo didn’t return and instead barked several more times. He sounded increasingly agitated.
Anna broke into a slow jog, mindful of the uneven ground jostling her knee. Finally, she could make out the dog’s silhouette. He was sitting next to—
“Bob?” Rachel broke into a run, overtaking Anna. “Oh no. Bob!”
Anna pulled out her torch and aimed it at Bob, careful not to shine it into his eyes. He was lying at the edge of the field, half-hidden by lush uncut grass.
His skin was pale. Beads of sweat dotted his hairline, trickling down his cheeks and gathering along his jawline. He was gritting his teeth and shaking.
“What’s going on? Are you hurt?” Rachel knelt by his side. She cupped his cheek in her hand. “You’re a
s cold as ice.”
“I hurt my shoulder,” Bob whispered so softly that Anna almost couldn’t make out the words. A thin film of sweat covered his neck.
Rachel removed her pullover and covered his torso. “Did you fall?”
Bob nodded and moaned. “I dislocated my shoulder.”
Graham pressed his mouth into a thin line. “Have you managed to pop it back in?”
“No.” A mixture of sweat and tears seeped into the collar of his shirt. Bob’s features were contorted with pain, and he groaned.
Anna frowned as Rachel unbuttoned his shirt, exposing his shoulder.
“Don’t.” There was a tremble in his voice. “It hurts too much.”
“We need to pop your shoulder back in, Bob,” Graham said. “It’ll only get worse as everything around it swells up. How long have you been lying here like this?”
“Not long. I found tinned tuna.” He jerked his chin in direction of the backpack. Oreo gave Bob’s cheek a lick, and Bob grimaced, turning his head away. “I know Sue is sick of eating rabbit.”
“Come here, Oreo.” Anna patted her thigh, and he obediently trotted over.
Rachel ran a hand along Bob’s collarbone and down his arm. The frown on her face deepened.
“Do you know what you’re doing?” Anna asked.
Rachel shook her head. “I think…I think we have to pull on it until it slips back in.”
Anna winced. “On the shoulder?”
“On his arm,” Graham said.
“Don’t you dare pull on my arm,” Bob muttered. “Just help me get up. I can walk home.”
Rachel scowled. “You’ve been lying here unable to get up. What makes you think you can walk home?”
“I just need a bit of help.” Bob tried to sit up as if to prove his point and yelped. The blood drained from his face, and he looked as white as a sheet. He lay back down, closing his eyes. “I don’t feel so well.”
Oreo whined and shook his head as if he didn’t like the sound of Bob’s pained moans.
“I’m going to touch your hand now. Don’t worry, I won’t move it.” Rachel gingerly took Bob’s hand. “It feels cold to the touch.” She narrowed her eyes. “Can you move your fingers?”
Darkness Ahead of Us | Book 3 | Darkness Lifting Page 5