“I don’t think we’ve really had the chance to get to know you.” Jonas popped a cherry tomato into his mouth. “All of our gatherings have been pretty Elkin-focused. Where does your family come from?”
“Las Vegas. Born and raised.” Anna shrugged, with a light laugh. “It’s not a very interesting story.”
Gabe wasn’t buying it for a single minute. Everything Anna did took the form of an interesting story. That was why she was so good at arranging conferences—why she could make an inspiring narrative out of just about anything.
Gabe searched his memory for the true story of her family, but somehow, they’d never talked about it. If she’d revealed her past to him, he would know. And now all he could think about were the ways she shifted away from those kinds of questions, or changed the subject, leaving him to wonder about her childhood. Jonas nodded slowly, suspicion creeping into his eyes. “So, you grew up in Vegas then. That sounds exciting.”
“We lived in the eastern portion, in the suburbs,” Anna said. “But honestly, I don’t like to talk about my childhood. It was an uncomfortable time.”
Chase straightened up in his seat, looking down at his salad, and Tana’s expression shifted toward sympathy.
“But what’s important,” she continued brightly, “is that I’ve managed to make it on my own, and I’m happy where I am now. Very happy.”
Anna looked back at her salad and stabbed at a piece of lettuce resolutely with her fork.
Gabe could see that Jonas wanted to ask more questions. He could see it in the intense look on his brother’s face. “You’ll be the first to know when we’ve decided about the wedding,” he said pointedly, ending the conversation.
The brothers let it drop, talking about attendance on the slopes until the main course came. But Anna didn’t relax. She spoke up every so often, usually to agree with Tana or ask Chase about his new position at the resort. Tension wound its way up the back of Gabe’s neck until it was too tight to bear. When the waiter came to clear away the dinner plates, he took Anna’s hand and brushed a kiss across her knuckles. “I think we’re going to head out,” he announced to everyone else at the table.
Anna put on one more smile, and the two of them left. It wasn’t until they got off the elevator at their floor that her shoulders sagged. She leaned against him, trembling a little.
“I’m sorry,” he said. “Jonas doesn’t know when to stop sometimes. I think he missed the class on sensitivity.”
“I don’t understand why he’s so determined to find out more,” she said through gritted teeth. Her arm went around his waist, and she held tight while he opened the door and entered their suite. Anna brushed past him to push the door shut and slam the locks into place. “My family has nothing to do with the wedding, or with me, and—”
“He’s just trying to look out for me. My family doesn’t love that I live in Vegas, where they can’t keep an eye on everything I’m doing. It is Sin City afterall.”
She rolled her eyes.
“I know—but it’s out of love. I know it is.” It irritated him, too, all the questions. Anna clearly hadn’t wanted to talk about it, and Jonas had pressed on anyway. “That doesn’t excuse the way he kept pressing for answers.”
She let out a breath, some of the color receding from her face. “I get it. It’s nice you have someone who cares one way or the other.” Her gaze flicked down to the floor, and the corner of her mouth turned down. This time, he reached up to brush his thumb over that hint of a frown. Anna met his eyes again, and he was struck by the depth he found there, and the warmth, even when she was sad.
“Tell me what’s happening with you,” he coaxed. “You’ve been tense since you knew about this dinner with my brothers. Did something happen out on the ski hill?”
“No,” she said quickly. “No, I just—I found out more about how it was for you guys—growing up. It wasn’t anything like my childhood, and I felt...I felt like a puzzle piece that had fallen into the wrong box. Like I would never fit in here, even if I tried. And I know it doesn’t matter, but...I guess it does matter. To me.”
She bit her lip, and a rush of affection as clean and pure as mountain water hit him. She had the same worry he did. But how? Anna was the perfect woman. She’d been successful in everything she’d worked for, and all she needed now was a bit of an investment on his part to be an enormous success.
He swallowed, taking her face in his hands. If he asked this next question, it would change things between them. Gabe knew it would. But she’d danced around this issue for so long, and it seemed to be at the heart of all her worries. “I know you don’t want to talk about your family. At least not with my brothers—and I understand that. But I wish you would tell me.”
“You don’t want to know. I promise you don’t.”
“I do.” Gabe looked her square in the eye as he said it. “I want to know everything about you.” I want to kiss you, too. “But you don’t have to tell me if it’s something you’d rather keep to yourself. I’m only saying…” This was not the kind of conversation Gabe was used to having, and it was so uncomfortable it hurt, but he wasn’t going to give up on this now. Anna was worth it. “I’m only saying that I’m here, and I’d like to know because I care about you. That is if you’re willing to tell me.”
14
Anna knew it would be so easy to give in to Gabe.
With his hands on her face and his stormy eyes locked on hers, she wanted nothing more than to tell him everything. Every last, awful detail. It would be cleansing, in a way. She wouldn’t have to keep that part of her life carefully separate.
But she hadn’t come here to unburden herself about her past. And tension between them was the last thing she wanted. Tiredness pressed down on her shoulders, a bone-weary feeling that had dogged her for years. It was easier to give him an edited version of the past than to convince him that he didn’t need to know.
Because he did need to know. Anna’s stomach turned as though she was standing at the edge of a high cliff, waiting to fall, knowing it was inevitable. If she was going to live with the way she felt about him, then he had to know. Better now than later when her past could only do more damage.
“My parents went through a bitter divorce when I was young,” she said, finding it the easiest way to begin. They’d divorced because it was the first time her father had been in prison for longer than a year. The information rose to the tip of her tongue, but just as quickly died away. It was one fact that didn’t come under the share category. “I had to take care of myself because my mother was working nonstop to provide for us, and my older brother was always busy.”
She could still remember the stepstool in the kitchen that she would pull up to the stove to cook macaroni and cheese before she grew tall enough to do it unaided. The extra food from school had come home in a plastic bag that was painfully obvious—all those packages of oatmeal and granola bars and things to tide her over through the weekend. Anna had tried her best to stuff the food deep into her backpack, so nobody else would see, but those telltale bags were handed out in the lunchroom. There was really no hiding it.
And her mother hadn’t just been working. She’d been bringing lots of different men home. Those men would stay the night, leaving early without being quiet. “I was on my own a lot.”
Gabe studied her, compassion in his eyes. It wasn’t pity, no—she’d seen plenty of that. It was empathy. But how long would that last? Gabe would never really understand what it had been like to grow up the way she had. He would never know what it was like to watch her older brother follow his father’s footsteps into a criminal’s life. All those facts simmered beneath the surface, never far away, but she couldn’t let them free.
Not to Gabe. Not to anyone.
“I’m sorry,” he murmured. “You shouldn’t have had to be alone.” Hearing that from him made her feel painfully vulnerable, like he could see inside her mind to all her roiling thoughts. No. Letting people in like that was a recipe for disast
er.
Anna straightened, hooking her hands around his wrists and feeling the warmth of his skin through her palms. “But I was, and I made it through. I—I put myself through college, and none of my family showed up for graduation. Not that I expected them to. I’ve been on my own a long time and prefer it that way.”
Gabe closed his eyes as if she’d told him something too awful to bear. It had merely been her life. There were other things she could imagine that were worse, and she’d done what she had to do to survive. “And Jonas wouldn’t stop bothering you about them,” he said, his voice pained. “I’m sorry about that.”
His eyes met hers again, and she wanted to fall into his gaze. Fall into that gray-green heat and roll herself up in it until there was nothing except Gabe. “It’s all right.”
“It’s not. It wasn’t all right, but it’s nothing to be ashamed of, either.” His brow furrowed. “Was there anything else that happened?”
My father’s a criminal, she wanted to say. Gabe had accepted everything else she’d told him, but that—that was the worst thing. It could be the tipping point between seeing her as a person and seeing her as a charity case—someone to help for the sake of helping. Or worse, he could judge her unworthy to be around his family.
“There was a thing with my fiancé, Freddie.” She bit her lip. “The breakup hit me hard. It’s made me wary of relationships. But you know that,” she said quickly. “We don’t have to have this conversation, you know. We could keep things simple.” Anna slid her hands down the front of his shirt. “Simple, like it was earlier.”
He caught her wrists in his hands. “When you’re this on edge? I don’t think so. By the way, he was wrong.”
“Was he?”
“Yes.”
Anna allowed herself a tiny grin. “Exercise is a good stress reliever.”
A smile broke over Gabe’s face, so handsome she wanted a painting of it. “I have another idea.” He took her hand, led her to the sofa, guided her to a seat in the middle, and sat next to her. “Do you like it hard or soft?”
She burst out laughing. “What are you talking about?”
His hands on her shoulders should have answered the question. “A massage, silly.” His voice lit up something sensuous inside of her, but Gabe was serious. His hands kneaded her shoulders.
“Medium,” she allowed, sinking into his touch. “I like it medium.”
Gabe lingered over her shoulders, releasing the tension there, working down her back until she had to lie forward on the sofa.
It was actually the first massage she’d ever had.
Anna had never thought of massages as something available to her. Her mom certainly hadn’t had the money for such a non-essential. And when Anna was out on her own and starting her career, the essentials were things like an apartment and professional work clothes—not massages. Tears pricked at the corners of her eyes. No one she’d ever been with had touched her like this. Not as a way to get in her pants, but a real massage—something to remove the tension from her muscles and help her relax.
Which, of course, had the side effect of sparking a new desire in her, low down where there had only been nerves and dread. Gabe had worked his way down to her calves and was gently kneading the muscles there. Anna couldn’t stay on the couch anymore. She pushed herself up and into his arms, sliding her palms over his shoulders and to the back of his neck.
“Thank you,” Anna whispered. Suddenly they were kissing. It happened so fast it was impossible to tell which one of them started it. She only knew that his lips were on hers, reassuring and possessive. She climbed into his lap, straddling him, letting him spread his hands out along her back.
The dinner fell away. The Elk Lodge fell away. The world fell away, and there were only their bodies pressed close together. Gabe was hard against her and her own body lit up in response, nipples tightening, skin coming alive at his touch through her dress.
He slowed the kiss, his hands running over her hair and her neck. “We don’t have to,” he said against her mouth.
It made her feel fragile in a way that she hadn’t ever allowed herself to feel. Not since childhood. Not for a long, long time. “I want to,” she whispered back.
He lifted her off the couch and took her to the bedroom, where he lingered over the undressing process. Gabe slowly pulled her dress over her head and inched her tights down her legs. He traced the lace on her bra, tugged the straps down her shoulders one by one, and then unclipped it with infinite patience. He drew his fingers across the matching pattern on her panties before taking them off, eyes shining like he was unwrapping a Christmas present.
Gabe bent his head and kissed her an inch below her belly button. Anna was so ready for him that she arched upward, getting caught up in another demanding kiss. He kept kissing her in between his efforts to undo his pants, rid himself of his shirt, and roll on a condom. Then he was nudging between her legs. Oh, she wanted more of that. He let out a low groan at the way she tilted her hips up, begging with her body, and pushed inside.
It felt like coming home.
All the air went out of her lungs and flooded back in with a hundred times the oxygen, making everything seem bright and fresh. Gabe filled her in all the ways she needed. He drove out everything but him, and when he moved into a slow, patient rhythm, it was like being rocked by the ocean. Inevitable and sexy and so much bigger than she was. Bigger than her past, bigger than the future—the moment surrounded her.
Something broke within her as desire wound tighter and tighter at her core. A slow progression that nearly drove her crazy with how deliberate he was. Gabe was completely focused on her—a master in control who constantly adjusted so that her clit got maximum attention. Tears slipped out from the corners of her eyes.
This was the closest they’d ever been.
She’d thought it had been earlier when they’d made the bed a tangle of sheets and shut the world out with pure physical frenzy. But this was different. There was no looking away from Gabe. No feeling anything but him.
And he saw her.
His eyes raked over her again and again. “Yes,” he murmured. “That’s it.” Anna knew he’d been watching her so intently that he knew, he knew, that the pleasure had built to a peak and was about to crest.
Her orgasm tumbled over her in a tidal wave of sensation. Gabe kept moving, and before she’d even come down from the high, another one was building. Anna dug her nails into his shoulders, and only then did he pick up the pace. Only then did his expression shift, becoming fiercer and almost elemental somehow.
Her second orgasm came quicker, like it was moving at a dead sprint, and Gabe tensed above her, driving in deep. Deeper. She could hardly breathe and didn’t want to. She just wanted him. She wanted more of him, until her shuddering finally stopped, and he dropped his head onto her shoulder.
She wasn’t sure how much longer it was when they lay back against the pillows and pulled up the blanket. Delicious tiredness enveloped her along with Gabe’s arm. She could drift off right now if it weren’t for one thought.
Borrowed time.
This moment with him, in bed, his warm, hard body next to hers—it was all on borrowed time. It was easy enough for him to say that Anna didn’t have to be ashamed of her past and that Freddie had been wrong, but that didn’t mean his family would ever agree. And Gabe seemed to dance along the edges of communication with them. He didn’t want to let them in, just like she hadn’t wanted to let him in on this, either.
Stay with me, she wanted to say, breaking apart the agreement they’d made and putting it out there that she wanted more from him. But what would the outcome be? If he had the choice between a relationship with her and maintaining a relationship with his family, he might choose them. Gabe had admitted he didn’t fit in and admitted he’d had to buck their pressure to start his own career, but the pull of family was strong. A man couldn’t stand up to it forever.
She wouldn’t risk it now.
Gabe’s breathing
evened out. Too late, anyway. Besides, with her muscles so tired and pleasure still clinging to her veins, it was difficult to stay awake.
15
The knock at the door of the suite the next morning startled Anna awake. She threw back the covers on instinct, but Gabe’s arm was still around her, holding her close. She let out a little groan that was half excitement and half disappointment that someone wanted their attention. Anna blinked a few times. She couldn’t answer the door naked, that was for sure. She rubbed a hand up and down Gabe’s arm, coaxing him awake. Goosebumps rose on his skin at her touch.
The knock sounded again.
“There’s somebody at the door,” she whispered, feeling suddenly like they’d been caught doing something illicit. It was a thrill, in a way—her heart raced, and adrenaline rushed in, making her breath come quickly. That was the fun kind of thrill. They were supposed to be doing this. Gabe’s phone buzzed on the bedside table. Another knock.
Gabe sat up next to her, his face red from the pillow where he slept. He made a small noise of protest as he registered her words. “Who’s here?”
“Your brother?”
Irritation flashed across his face, and then he was out of bed, grabbing for his pajama bottoms.
Anna admired how they displayed his body to utter perfection, forgetting she needed to get dressed as well. She only started moving when Gabe pulled his shirt over his head and went for the door. Ooh, he looked good.
Anna would much rather think about how good he looked than the fact that she’d hadn’t been entirely honest with him last night. Everything she said was true, but she had left things out.
That didn’t matter now. Anna moved down the hall to listen. “What’s going on?”
“There’s a storm,” she heard Chase say, his voice muffled by the space between the bedroom and the door. “We’re short-handed because some of our staff got stuck at home, and we’ve got people who showed up just before the storm hit.”
The Billionaire’s Fake Christmas Engagement: Elkin Brothers Christmas Book Two Page 9