by G. K. Parks
Her green eyes stared at me with that helpless look of desperation that I’d seen when we first met. That look could make me crumble. “I need a plan.”
“Anything. Tell me how I can help.”
“You can’t. I just had to come back and get some stuff together. I’m going back to school.”
“Really?” She’d be back in the city. We could pick up where we left off. I fought to keep from smiling. This thought obviously had her upset, so I had to be sensitive to that.
“Yeah, and I need Mary Beth to write me a letter of recommendation and help me fill out the application.”
“Your roommate?”
“She was more than that. In some ways, she saved me almost as much as you did. She helped me put my life back together, to find myself, to move forward. She does a lot for the battered women’s shelter here. I want her input on what I should include in my essay and what to avoid.” She pulled her gaze from the spot on the floor she’d been staring at since the conversation started.
“You’ll need money for tuition, books, and housing.” I reached for my phone and opened my banking app. “I told you I set aside the money from the settlement for you. That’s your account. Graduate school or post-grad,” since she already had a master’s degree, “can be expensive. Let me transfer more from the investment account into your bank account. How much do you think you’ll need?”
“I don’t want your money, Lucien. You’ve already done enough.”
“Nonsense. I’ve done nothing. The only reason I received the settlement was because of the hell you endured. It should be yours. All of it.”
“No. It’s blood money. Yours. Mine. His.” She shook her head vehemently. “I don’t want it.”
“It can be used for good. It should be used for good.”
“Aren’t you using it for good?”
“I’m trying.” But I doubted my corporate clients counted in her eyes. Hopefully, Trey Knox’s case counted.
“Keep the money. I just need a place to crash while I get all of this together.”
“You can stay as long as you need.”
“I fly back in two days.”
“That’s not long.”
“No, it’s not.” She sucked in some air.
I picked up on the physical cues almost instantly. “Are you okay?”
She nodded, swallowing. “My therapist said it’d be hard returning to the city. Lots of bad memories. Lots of trauma and baggage that I still need to unpack, so to speak.”
“You didn’t seem this apprehensive before you left.”
“It’s worse coming back. It’s like muscle memory, but it’s not just that. Seeing you is hard too. I really do miss you, Lucien. You’re the one regret I have.”
“I’m sorry. I should have done more. I wish I’d figured out a way to stop him.”
“No, not that. Leaving you. I thought by now you’d have moved on, but you haven’t. I wish you would. This is burying me. It shouldn’t bury you too.”
“Jade?”
“I hate this.” She turned to stare at me. “I hate that I’m still so afraid. I thought when I moved away the nightmares would stop. That I wouldn’t find myself staring out the window, half-expecting to see him lurking in the shadows across the street or waiting for me when I get home from work. Isn’t that crazy? He’s dead. I know it, but I still can’t shake it. I just want to feel safe again.”
“Is that why you decided to take this trip?” I didn’t need her to answer. It was obvious.
She didn’t turn, but her head bobbed. “Leaving was stupid. It didn’t solve anything.”
“What can I do?”
“Nothing. This is something I have to work on. My therapist thinks coming back to the city and confronting the memories and my demons might help. Mary Beth agreed.”
“You’re going to be okay. It just takes time.”
“And help. But you’re right. I will be okay.”
“Would you like some tea? We have plenty.”
She laughed. “That would be nice.”
I filled the kettle, turning to find her standing beside me at the counter. We didn’t speak, but she stood close enough that her side brushed against mine. I should have done more to help her.
The kettle let out a shrill whistle. Exhaling, she turned off the burner. After filling her mug, she put the kettle back on the stove.
I placed the honey beside her and took a spoon out of the drawer. She took it from my hand, and our fingertips brushed. “So you’re going back to school. What are you thinking? Doctor? Lawyer?”
“I want to face my fears head on. I’m thinking social work.”
“Really?” That surprised me, even though it shouldn’t have. That job could be dangerous, and she’d have to work closely with police officers in some instances. Domestic abuse was a common issue social workers faced. This seemed wrong on every level imaginable. “There are plenty of ways to give back. You could do something else.”
“No. This is what I’m meant to do.” She squeezed a large dollop of honey into her cup and stirred it with the spoon. “Scott took my joy, my independence. And now that I’m finally free, I’m afraid I’ll run into another Scott, but these women are already dealing with men just as bad or worse. Someone has to help them. I understand what they’re going through, so it should be me.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes.” But she didn’t sound sure.
“You have time.”
“I know. That’s what school and therapy are for.” She spun, nearly shoulder-checking me in the process. “How do you cope? How can you go to work and take cases, knowing any one of them could be your last?”
“Gin. Lots of gin.”
“Lucien, be serious.”
“Fine. If you must know, the first thing I did was take a page out of your book. After that, I stopped thinking about it. If necessary, I force myself not to think about it. It won’t serve me to dwell. It’s over.”
“It’s that simple?”
“Most of the time. If not, there’s always booze.” I held up my glass. “Cheers.”
She picked up her teacup and clinked glasses with me. After savoring a few sips of the chamomile tea, she eyed me curiously. “What do you mean you took a page out of my book?”
Six
She traced her fingertip along the outline of the angel’s left wing. “This must have taken forever.”
“Thirty-five hours.” It was a lot of line work, no shading, and very few things filled in. I’d been considering going back to add more details, but the pain held little appeal.
“Are you insane?”
“Are you?” I asked. “The leopard on your leg took almost as long, and you did that before you even fully healed. I’m surprised the tattoo artist let you get away with that.”
“I couldn’t deal with the scars. I wanted something fierce. Something protective.”
“So did I.”
She pressed her lips against my spine above the ink. She knew, despite the tattoo, the scars were still tender. “You got the angel of death tattooed on your back, Lucien. How is that protective?”
“I’m not sure it’s my spirit animal or whatever, but it was only fitting.” I watched her over my shoulder as she gently traced the lines that concealed the scars hidden beneath. “Since the angels had such a firm grasp on me that day, I figured I might as well embrace it. What do you think?”
She ran her fingers down the angel’s body and off to the side. Tracing the one extended wing, she circled around to my front where the tattoo ended at the end of the bullet graze. “You should have mentioned it during one of our conversations.”
“Surprise.”
She gave my shoulder a shove. “What’s the point of keeping in touch when you don’t tell me what’s going on with you?”
I could say the same thing, but I didn’t want to start a fight. “Didn’t I offer to send you some shirtless photos?”
“Yes, but I thought…” She blushed. “Did Kai do yours too?�
�
“Uh-huh.” Until Jade had gotten a tattoo to cover her scars, I’d never considered getting anything this extensive. I had a small one on my chest, the result of a drunken dare, but this was different. It had taken three and a half months and nine sessions to get it done.
“Did it hurt?”
“I didn’t feel it in most places.”
“And some places were excruciating,” she said knowingly. Her hands ran up my chest. “I did say you were my guardian angel. I guess this proves it.”
“I thought you told me I was a fallen angel.”
“Is that why you got the tattoo?”
I shrugged. “I missed you.”
“You keep saying that.” She looked up at me from beneath her lashes. “What would have happened if I stayed? Would you still have gone through with this?”
“Probably.” I cleared my throat, uncomfortable with the question and unwilling to move when she was standing so close, touching me. Even the slightest twitch would cause her to retreat, and I didn’t want that. “You could have come with me and kept me company. If you don’t like angels, you could have talked me into getting something else.”
“A giant panda bear.”
“A panda bear?”
“They’re cute and cuddly.”
“I thought we were going for fierce and powerful.”
“You shielded me with your body. You’re already fierce and powerful. You didn’t need a tattoo to prove you’re a badass.”
“You think I’m a badass?”
“Shut up.” She took a step back, and I fought to keep from reaching for her. “You didn’t answer my question. What would have happened if I never left? Would we be dating? Would you be my boyfriend? Would we live together?”
“Don’t you think we might be rushing into things?”
“We slept together for months, but what, we would just hook up from time to time?”
“Jade, our first night together might have been a hookup, but it meant more to me than that. Despite everything, the next few months we spent together, recovering, healing, that wasn’t something casual. You mean too much to me to be a fling.” I turned and reached for my shirt and pulled my arms through the sleeves.
“You never said anything.”
“What was there to say? You needed to get away from here. I wasn’t going to stop you. Long distance wouldn’t have worked. It’s not fair to either of us, not when I’m here and you’re there.”
She pressed her palms against my cheeks. “Say it.” She grasped my hands as I tried to button my shirt. “I need you to say it.”
“I wish you never left. Is that what you want to hear?”
With a sad smile, she stood on her tiptoes and kissed me. “That’s all I needed to know.” Then she took my hand and pulled me toward the bedroom.
* * *
Hugging the pillow beneath my arm, I faced Jade. Her fingers had found their way to the ink on my back. “What would you like for breakfast?” I asked.
“I’m still on Colorado time. My body thinks it’s four a.m.”
“Okay.” I leaned over and gently kissed her. “I’ll try to be quiet. Go back to sleep.”
She grabbed my arm before I could get out of bed. “Are you going to work today?”
“I’m sorry, honey. I have a few meetings I can’t miss and some research I need to do for a client, but I’ll have Justin cancel my afternoon. By the time you wake up, I should be back.”
“Don’t do that. I’m meeting Mary Beth for lunch, and I have to swing by the university to get copies of my transcripts. I probably won’t be here most of the day. I don’t want my visit to disrupt your life. You should do whatever you have to.”
“How about we have dinner?” I climbed out of bed and opened one of my drawers, searching for my spare apartment key. “We could go to the Mexican place you like.”
“I was thinking Chinese.”
“That works too.” I pulled out the key and placed it on the bedside table. “I can leave my car if you need transportation.”
“Lucien, what did I say yesterday?”
“Right, sorry.” I put the key down. “Here’s the apartment key. Feel free to come and go as you please. If you have any problems, you have my cell number.”
“And the office. And Justin’s cell.” She shut her eyes and let out a little moan.
“Jade,” but I chickened out of saying what was on my mind, “I’ll see you tonight.”
While my internal voice berated and belittled my cowardly ways, I showered. The water stung my back, and when I dried off, I found a few smears of red. Turning in the mirror, I ignored the pinch and laughed at the scratches Jade had left on my back. She’d been careful not to put her hands anywhere tender, which was good since she hadn’t taken it easy on me.
When would we find our even keel? Last night, she said we should hook up whenever we were in the same time zone, but from the way she said it, I wondered when that would be. If she were going back to school, wouldn’t she be moving back to the city? Or was she applying elsewhere? Maybe she didn’t want to go to her alma mater, the place that had led her to Scott.
I had to stop. This was ridiculous. I wasn’t some love-struck teen. I was Lucien fucking Cross. And I loved her. The thought shocked me, mostly because I’d never realized it until now. I didn’t want her to leave again. She should stay. But that wasn’t my decision. It had to be hers. Colorado had been the right choice, but maybe she would come back. But the voice in the back of my head knew the truth.
Once I was dressed, I left the apartment, making sure it was locked and my security system was armed. She knew the codes, so I wasn’t worried. On my way to the office, I grabbed breakfast for everyone. As usual, I was the first to arrive at work.
I left the bag of bagels in the break room, made coffee, snagged a cinnamon raisin, and went into my office. I didn’t have much scheduled for today since I planned to spend it with Jade. But now that I had extra time on my hands and Trey Knox needed help, I might as well pick up where I left off.
“Morning,” Justin called. A moment later, he came into my office holding half of an everything bagel while he squeezed cream cheese onto it. “You brought a bag of comfort food for breakfast. That’s never good. How was your night?”
I gave him a look.
“Not good?” he asked around a mouthful.
“Let’s just get to work.”
“Whatever you say, boss.”
Seven
Trey Knox liked sports, and he liked to bet on sports. That had led to a chunk of his credit card debt, but he’d stopped using the online sportsbook sites several months ago. His credit cards weren’t maxed out, and his more recent expenses involved buying more items for his collection. Did they have a support group for obsessed sports fans? I didn’t know, nor did I care. That was Knox’s problem. I had enough of my own.
The sportsbook sites he visited were automated transactions. No forums. No message boards. No interactions. I didn’t have to worry that someone targeted him from there, which left all the auction and store sites. “This is going to take forever.”
I resisted the urge to get another cup of coffee. I already had a headache, which the last cup of espresso exacerbated. Instead, I popped a few aspirin and grabbed a bottle of water. Maybe I needed to hydrate.
Pressing the intercom button, I said, “Justin, what did you find on the auction houses?”
“The physical ones?”
“Yes.”
“No other reported problems. I’m still working on background checks, but so far, everything’s been inconclusive. They don’t hire ex-cons.”
“Okay. What about the delivery drivers?”
“Knox picked everything up personally. Nothing was ever delivered.”
I crossed that off my list. “I’ll look into the security firm that installed his home security system while you finish up the auction houses. I already reached out to area pawn shops and posted a few listings on the dark web for anyone
who could fence these items.”
“Do you think you’ll get a bite?”
“We’ll see.”
Opening a new tab, I went to the security firm’s website, read every bit of information they had listed on their home security systems, performed several other searches, and found an online video tutorial on how to bypass the system. That meant any idiot could have broken into Knox’s house. At least I knew it had to be a three-man team, at the very least.
Returning to the security firm’s website, I searched for a list of employees, but they didn’t broadcast that information. So I did some more digging until I got a roster of names. Three of their tech consultants had records for B&E and one for armed robbery.
I checked their criminal records, but those hadn’t been home invasions. They’d been high-end heists. Obviously, these reformed cons had gotten positions in the company by assessing the security system’s weaknesses.
I’d keep them on my radar, but they’d been on the straight and narrow far too long. And given what they were making at the company, stealing Knox’s collection wouldn’t be worth it. They stood to lose far more than what they could gain. But I had to perform my due diligence, so I checked their business records for other security systems that had been installed and cross-referenced them to reported break-ins. Nothing lined up. Knox was the only person with that particular security system who had suffered a break-in within the last two years.
Scribbling down their names, I did a quick social media search, checked their known associates, and texted Knox their names and photos to see if he recognized any of them. A moment later, my phone rang.
“Cross Security and Investigations,” I answered, my focus on the computer screen in front of me.
“Do you think these men are responsible?” Knox asked.
“Mr. Knox,” I never expected him to call back so soon, “I’m just checking into every possibility. Do you recognize any of them?”
“No. Should I?”
“That’s not how this works. The only answer I expect is an honest one.” According to the records I’d seen, the security system had already been installed before Knox moved in. He had no reason to interact with these men unless one of them had targeted him.