—I will find him.
The woman Suh closed her eyes.
—I will find him and . . . and live with him.
Jin, holding the daegeum, rushed out of Suh’s room, hastily shoved her feet into her shoes, and walked out to the orphanage courtyard. There, her knees gave way.
6
On the Edge
The October darkness descended over the ancient pine of the palace.
The chill dark fell on the main gate, on the Gate of Rising Spring where a dragon was said to live, upon the Hall of Diligent Governance nestled in the Baekaksan and Inwangsan Mountains, over the waters of the Pavilion of Festivities, on Amisan Hill, the dowager’s residences, the Pagoda of Far-reaching Fragrance, and the eastern watchtower. Jin was waiting for the Queen’s summons in the library at Geoncheonggung, and only when it became too dark to read did she reluctantly go to Lady Suh’s quarters. Lady Suh, who was just on her way to the Queen’s bedchamber, was wide-eyed with surprise at the sight of Jin.
—Are you still at court!
—I was told to wait in the library, but I was never summoned.
—And no word for you to return home?
—No.
—There is a meeting with the French, German, and Russian legates. It’s running late. China losing the war with Japan is making things difficult for us. They’re working day and night to defend our country against Japan. The Queen hasn’t slept in days. But how strange. She asked me to tell her the minute you arrived at court. I thought she would call for you as soon as I announced you.
Lady Suh’s face, younger than the woman Suh of the orphanage but still far from young, grimaced as she looked her up and down.
—I told you to come to court observing proper form . . .
She remained disapproving of Jin’s Western attire. Jin said nothing and lowered her head. Her dresses did seem to feel awkward as of late.
—But where were you before today? The Queen asked for you several times.
—. . .
—Is it true you cut your hair and dressed as a man, looking for the musician Kang of Jangakwon?
—. . .
—What foolishness is this? Don’t you know what would happen if you saw him again? So, did you find him?
—He is gone.
A look of relief crossed Lady Suh’s tense expression.
—Don’t look for him. That’s the only way for both of you to survive. And do not resent Her Majesty. She was anguished when she learned too late of the musician’s fate. She had Hong Jong-u sent to China over this affair, albeit there was also pressure from the new Japanese legate. She had trusted him, but she didn’t even give him an audience when he was sent away. The musician Kang gave his hands to save your life. But your ridiculous clothes! And your hair! Is this how you repay him?
—I would rather my own fingers be cut off. You know his story as well as I do! They silenced the music of a mute man. What was his crime that he should deserve such punishment?
—His crime was in knowing you.
Jin’s dress, the color of water, was looser in fit than it had been, and fluttered with her every movement. Like the time she would wander the streets every night, the dress, designed to showcase her décolletage and her legs, looked as if it had been tailored for a different person.
—Things are not well at court. Not well at all. Her Majesty was going to call for you immediately, I do not know why she hasn’t. They say France may establish a school here, and if that’s the reason, I hope it becomes a lifeline for you. Spend the night at my quarters tonight, Soa is on the night watch at the Hall of Precious Rest. I shall see what is going on and send word.
Lady Suh left her quarters, and Jin sat alone, staring at the intricate wooden frame of the window. Jin had not been able to sleep lying down since learning that Yeon had lost his fingers for her. She had hacked off the long black hair that Victor had loved so much, dressed as a man like in the old days when she and Victor accompanied Hwang Cheol and his camera around the city, and spent the past three months searching for Yeon over land and stream.
Waves of anguish came over her whenever she thought of Yeon being unable to hold out his hands or grasp someone else’s.
She started at Subunli, the village nestled inside the split between the Sobaek and Noryoung Mountains, and walked through the markets, to the ocean, and to the marshes where he was said to go every May to hunt for the best reeds for instrument-making. He was nowhere to be found. Every step of the way she thought she saw severed fingers. What could a man without fingers do? Thinking about it made her wonder if the human form was mostly made of hands, for nothing could be done easily without them. Above all, he could not write letters. Jin had found more than a thousand letters in the closet in Yeon’s room. He must have written her incessantly since her departure from France. The only one that had made it to Jin was the single missive delivered by Sister Jacqueline. She couldn’t read through them in one sitting, so she took them with her while she searched. Reading his unsent letters made everything around her seem like traces of him. She thought of Vincent, the son of the cheesemonger in Victor’s childhood village, so happy to have realized his modest dream. Why couldn’t Yeon have such happiness? Three months after embarking on her search, Jin returned to the city fortress. She had once felt enraged enough to cut off Hong Jong-u’s fingers herself. But now, she only wanted to show him Yeon’s letters. In fact, she wanted to go to Hong and show him the letters herself. But Hong was not in the city. The Japanese had ignored Kim Okgyun when he was alive, but a mania for mourning him had arisen among them since his assassination, threatening Hong and forcing him to flee to China.
During her search, Jin came across countless children who had been abandoned like Yeon as a boy. She also encountered many ugly rumors about the Queen. She heard that an attempt on the Queen’s life by a diplomatic official named Park Younghyo had been unmasked. The Japanese legate Inoue was replaced by Miura to better fight the Queen’s Russia policy, and Miura was said to be no different from the loitering rōnin brandishing their swords around Jaemulpo Harbor. While her eyes searched for Yeon and her ears listened for rumors of the Queen, Jin continued to come across orphans who suffered from disease. They were bullied by other children and scolded away by women and lived near chimneys for their bit of warmth or in pens or by dung piles. On her way back to the city, Jin carried a filthy little girl on her back and left her to the care of the Gondangol orphanage. There were countless orphans, but Blanc’s Gondangol orphanage with its one building for boys and the other for girls was the only facility that could take them in. She remembered Blanc’s constant requests to the Paris Foreign Missions Society for more nuns and funding to help with the children. As she wandered through the country, searching for Yeon, Jin thought she could understand why Blanc had been so intent on helping them. She could overlook the gazes of everyone else, but the stares of the children pierced her heart. Blanc would have felt the same. She was determined to speak for the children if she ever met with the Queen again. Which was why she complied with Lady Suh’s request to come to the palace immediately for an audience with the Queen. She did think there would be a bit of a wait, having been told to meet in the library at Geoncheonggung. She had understood that this was a considerate gesture, that she was meant to read during what might become a long wait. But no word came for her despite the lengthening shadows.
Jin woke from her sleep, leaning against a wall, and heard someone calling her name. She came out of Lady Suh’s quarters to find a young lady attendant she had never seen before.
—Lady Suh says you must flee the palace at once.
—What happened?
—I don’t know. She only said that you must not hesitate, and you must flee the palace at once.
Jin noticed that the young girl’s shoulders were trembling. So was her voice.
—Tell me everything you saw. Is something happening at court?
—I do not know, only there is a great commotion . . .
—Men brandishing swords . . . they’re all over the palace. I think . . . they’re Japanese.
Men with swords? Jin put on her shoes and ran toward Geoncheonggung.
At that exact hour, Miura had received official sanction from the Regent and gathered Japanese rōnin and troops to join the new Korean army at Seoul’s Western Gate to make a push into the main gate of Gyeongbokgung Palace. Miura, judging that a purely Japanese army would compromise the legitimacy of their invasion, cunningly sought the support of the Regent and the new Korean army that had been trained by the Japanese. The new army had it out for the Queen, who had ordered their disbandment for the reason that these troops, commanded by Wu Beomseon, was created through Japanese pressure against Korea. She intended to weaken Japan’s political influence by ridding them of an army that was loyal to the Japanese.
The Japanese forces roared as they charged at the gate, guns blazing, and Hong Gyehoon, before he could even finish asking whether there was an order to assemble the Japanese troops, was slashed by the sword of a rōnin. The Japanese fired eight bullets at his bleeding body. Jin heard the sound of gunfire as she ran toward Geoncheonggung. The palace defense fought the Japanese forces but were quickly defeated, having lost their commander so early.
Geoncheonggung was soon overrun with rōnin, their fiery torches lighting up the sanctum like the sun. The rōnin’s swords flashed in the torchlight as they swarmed from room to room. They were searching for the Queen. They grabbed any council member or lady attendant who got in their way and held their swords to their throats, demanding to be told where the Queen was. The young lady attendants, too afraid to say a word, would faint and be tossed aside, their clothes torn. Jin saw the Russian electrical engineer Sabatin shaking his head, the point of a sword poised at his throat. Geoncheonggung was unfamiliar to Jin. Trembling, she ran past Sabatin and the rōnin. She came across the King, who was surrounded by even more long-haired rōnin.
—Where is the Queen!
The King said he knew nothing. The Crown Prince ran up to the rōnin and stood before the King, facing the rōnin.
—What’s the meaning of this!
His voice could barely be heard in the chaos.
—Tell us where the Queen is.
—We don’t know!
The veins in the Crown Prince’s neck stood out. A Japanese officer gestured with his chin, and a rōnin brought a sword to the Crown Prince’s throat.
—Tell us where that bitch is!
The King closed his eyes. He bit his lip and lowered his hands. He intuited that the Japanese had invaded the palace to murder the Queen. But the King believed in her. If she could escape this chaos, just as she did in the Year of the Black Horse, she would survive. He needed to buy her time.
—We’ll tell you where she is.
The King firmly pointed in the opposite direction of her bedchamber. The rōnin immediately flocked toward where he pointed.
—Sign this.
The Japanese officer shoved an expulsion order before the King.
—What’s this?
The King knew very well that it was an expulsion order for the Queen, but he pretended to puzzle over it. The Japanese officer kept insisting he sign it. When he hesitated, a rōnin pressed down on the King’s shoulder with the blunt back-edge of his sword. The King still refused, and another rōnin went behind him and grabbed the back of his robe.
The King was too overwhelmed to feel humiliated.
Even as his dragon robes were grabbed and his crown fell to the ground, he thought of only one thing. As the rōnin pressed him down to the ground with the blunt side of his sword, all he hoped for was that the Queen had somehow safely escaped the palace.
—Over there!
The rōnin surrounding the King began to rush toward the Queen’s chamber. No. The King tried to move, but two rōnin restrained him. The King’s face twisted in anguish. The Crown Prince blocked them, but they roughly pushed past him, stepping on his body in their hurry. The Crown Prince, his clothes torn, got up and ran after them. The crazed rōnin tossed or kicked aside the court ladies guarding the Hall of Precious Rest. A sword point found its way before Soa’s throat.
—Tell us where the bitch is!
Soa was shaking so hard she could barely open her mouth to reply, so a rōnin struck her on the back, felling her. The court ladies being dragged out by their hair to the courtyard of the Hall of Precious Rest were too terrified to make a sound. All that could be heard were the heavy footsteps of the rōnin and their incessant shouting for the Queen. Jin found Soa and was helping her to her feet when Soa suddenly shot her arm out, shielding Jin. A rōnin’s swinging blade cut into Soa’s arm. Jin could barely give voice to the scream that exploded inside her. She frantically shook Soa, trying to keep her conscious, and the rōnin stared at Jin’s short hair and Western dress before giving her a dismissive kick and running off.
—The Queen will be with her senior lady attendants!
Jin, her arms around her friend, looked up at the sound of this voice. A woman in a kimono was pointing the rōnin to the bedchamber. It was So Chonsil’s daughter, who had smiled beside the Queen during the throwing game. She handed out pictures of the Queen to the rōnin. The scores of rōnin rushed toward the direction she had pointed to. Just as Jin was about to lower Soa and run to the bedchamber herself, she felt the finger of So Chonsil’s daughter tilt her chin up toward her.
—It’s you. Look at yourself. I can’t tell if you’re a man or a woman.
Jin slapped away her hand and roughly grabbed a handful of her kimono. So Chonsil’s daughter cackled, her narrow eyes full of mirth.
—When this is over, why don’t we play a throwing game near the Pagoda of Far-reaching Fragrance?
Jin shoved her hard. So Chonsil’s daughter stumbled like a marionette, but quickly righted herself and stood before Jin face-to-face. Jin pushed her again, but So Chonsil’s daughter only tilted a little before shoving her face back in front of Jin’s. She was like a tumbling doll, righting herself no matter how hard Jin pushed her, blocking her way.
—I’ll kill you!
Jin threw a handful of Soa’s blood into the eyes of So Chonsil’s daughter. So Chonsil’s daughter brought her hands to her face, smearing the portraits of the Queen in her hands and scattering them on the ground. Her strange laugh haunted Jin’s ears as Jin raced into the inner chambers in search of the Queen.
The rōnin were throwing open every door.
Their faces were red and quaking with fury.
Every woman in the chambers had the same braided hair tied up, the same indigo skirt, jade-green tunic, and green jacket, the uniform of the senior court ladies. They even had identical large hairpins inserted into the back of their hair, their eyes full of fear and hatred. In the moment the rōnin briefly paused before this phalanx, the Crown Prince ran through them to stand before the door of the innermost chamber, blocking it. The rōnin pushed him aside and charged into the chamber. Despite the portraits, all the women sitting inside looked the same in their eyes. They had no way of telling which was the Queen. Jin, who had made it to the doorway, locked her bloodshot eyes with Lady Suh, sitting in the back row.
—Which one of you is the Queen!
The rōnin held the point of his cobalt blade before the court lady who sat in front.
—Speak! Which one of you is the Queen!
When the court lady before him closed her eyes, he thrust his sword into her throat. Jin fell to her knees. She crawled through the rōnin toward the slumped court lady, whose blood had sprayed all over the floor. Was this barbarity a nightmare or was it really happening? Was it possible that the chambers of a queen could be desecrated like this? “Stand back, stand back, stand back!” The shouts exploded from deep within Jin. On her knees, she commanded them, then implored, but the rōnin kicked her aside. The only woman in the chambers who clearly was not the Queen was Jin, as she had short hair and was in Western dress, the dress
that was blue as water. The rōnin brandished their swords at the court ladies who sat the closest to them.
—You!
Her throat was cut.
—You!
Her throat was cut.
—That one will know!
This was shouted by So Chonsil’s daughter, who had just entered the chamber, her face thickly smeared with Soa’s blood, her finger pointing to Jin. One side of the treacherous girl’s face was twisted in pain from having to betray the Queen who had so loved her. The eyes of the court ladies turned in unison to Jin. The bloodshot eyes of the Queen wavered in Jin’s dark pupils.
—Which one is the Queen! Point to her!
A rōnin held his sword to Jin’s throat. The Prince, who had been knocked to the floor, stood up and blocked one of the rōnin. The Minister of Palace Affairs Lee Kyung Jik interposed himself between the Prince and the rōnin. Without hesitation, the rōnin pierced Lee Kyung Jik’s belly with his sword, twisting left to right, right to left. Blood poured onto the floor. Lee Kyung Jik’s body was kicked aside, as the rōnin raised the blunt side of the sword above the Prince’s head. The women clung to each other in terror.
—Desist, you filth!
Just as one of the court ladies stood up, another ran toward the Prince. It was Lady Suh. The sword that had been pointed at Jin now swung toward Lady Suh. The other rōnin’s sword struck the prince’s head, knocking him unconscious, his crown rolling on the floor. “This cannot . . . this cannot be!” It was the cry of the woman who had stood up when the Prince was being threatened. She turned and ran out of the chambers through the back. So Chonsil’s daughter pointed at the woman. The rōnin who had trained their weapons at Lady Suh shouted, “That’s the Queen!” And followed suit. The court ladies crowded after them. An elderly court lady blocked the rōnin and shouted, “I am the Queen!” Her throat was cut. Jin was now among the court ladies, getting hit by the sword blades, kicked, and pushed aside with the others, but she still managed to run with the crowd. Please be safe, please be safe . . . Her consciousness was slipping, but she willed herself alert, opening her eyes wide. The rōnin, who had pursued the Queen to the lawn of an adjacent wing, grabbed her and threw her to the ground. Jin felt her knees give way, her body falling forward. One of the rōnin kicked her roughly as he rushed past. Jin tried to crawl toward the Queen, but her arms were seized and held together behind her back. It was So Chonsil’s daughter, snickering, but with a dazed expression. Jin’s dress was torn from behind, revealing her bare back. In the midst of her struggle to break free, she glanced up and what she saw made her blood turn to ice. Lady Suh, who had followed the Queen to the last, was impaled in the back with a sword. And in the next moment, that same sword was lifted again and plunged into the Queen’s heart. Movement in Jin’s eyes stopped, and crimson blood flowed from them.
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