Keep Me Wanting

by Angela Addams

  She comes, I come, wild, writhing, screaming climaxes that ratchet both of us up and up until our bodies are quivering, shuddering messes.

  We both collapse on the bed this time, me panting next to her, our bodies coated in sweat, skin so sensitive that I almost can’t bear anything touching me.

  “Fuck, Maggie,” I breathe.

  She laughs, turns into me, and runs her hand gently over the side of my face. “Amazing.”

  I pull her toward me, and she puts her leg over my hip, her pussy right there, and damn if my dick doesn’t stir to life once again. I can’t get enough. Not ever. And that, I know, doesn’t bode well for the state of my heart.

  Chapter Twenty-Seven

  Maggie

  “Maggie,” he croaks as he runs his fingers through my hair…then gets snagged in a tangle. “Shit, sorry!”

  I laugh. “This hair of mine, sheesh.”

  He kisses the top of my head and pulls me closer so I’m resting against his chest. His heart is beating steady and strong, and it’s lulling me into a sleepy tangle of thoughts. So many what ifs swirl in my head.

  “If I could make things different, I would.” Liam’s voice rumbles through me. An echo of my own thoughts.

  “What would our life be like?” I ask as I squeeze my eyes shut to keep the tears from seeping. “I mean, if we didn’t have the lives we do?”

  He sucks in a deep breath then lets it out. “Ah hell, we’d live in the south where there’s never any snow.”

  I laugh. “You don’t like the snow?”

  “Have you experienced a winter here, Maggie?”

  “Yes, I love skiing.”

  “You do? Never done that before. Can’t quite imagine myself whipping down a hill at breakneck speed on two wooden sticks.”

  “They aren’t really made out of wood these days.” I laugh. “You might like it. I could make ski classes very enjoyable, I think.”

  “I bet you could.” He smacks my ass and kisses my head again. “All the same, not much between you and the fast-moving ground beneath your feet. Snow, it ain’t exactly soft when you hit it fast and hard.”

  “You sound like you know first hand.”

  “Well, I happen to be the Doyle family ultimate snowball champion.” He laughs. “But all the same, I’d love to live somewhere warmer.”

  “Me, too. I hate the cold.” I wiggle against his side when he threatens to swat my ass again.

  “Okay, so we’re agreed, someplace warmer where we can take winter vacations away to get a snow fix…if we feel like it.”

  “And what would we do for work?”

  “Work?” He snorts. “We wouldn’t ever have to work.”

  “We wouldn’t?”

  “Oh, hell no, we’d both be independently wealthy.”

  “So no need to work?” I laugh. “And shopping all the time?”

  “Sure, if that’s what you’d like.”

  “It’s not something I do very often these days.”

  “Well, you’d be independently wealthy. You could do what you wanted.”

  “And kids? Do you ever want to have kids?” I hold my breath when I feel him tense up.

  “I’ve never really given it a lot of thought,” he says. “I’ve never met someone who I could see myself having kids with.” He runs his fingers down my arm and entwines them with mine. “How many would you want?”

  Warmth blooms in my chest. “Two, three? One day, I mean, not any time soon, but someday I’d love to have babies and a family with the right guy.”

  He tenses again, and I lift my head so I can look at him. His eyes are dark, pensive. There’s self doubt there.

  “Do you think I’m the right kind of guy for that?”

  My heart shatters at the vulnerability in his voice. “Liam, you’d be the best kind of guy for that.”

  The tension in his body is suddenly gone, and he squeezes me closer so he can kiss me.

  “Will you make love to me?” My voice quavers as I say that. I know it sounds so old school, but I just want our last time to be tender. As our time is winding down, I want to love him with my body, to let him know that this weekend has been so special to me. That I will never forget it or him. It makes me sad to think this way, but I know losing ourselves in the physical sense will take some of the edge off, for now, anyway.

  He doesn’t even blink, just reaches to the bedside table and gets another condom. He slips it on and is back inside me within seconds. This time, it feels different.

  The urgency isn’t there; the need to rut and writhe and be wild has been satiated. Instead, he’s kissing me, and I’m kissing him. Slowly, our tongues and bodies entwined, we make love to one another.

  I touch every part of him, run my fingers over his skin, trace the lines of his muscles, the cut of his hips, the feel of his ass gripped tightly as we move together, him on top of me, pressing down, his weight almost too much to bare, and yet it feels so damn good.

  My orgasm rises slowly, like a wisp of smoke, gentle as he coaxes it up, higher and higher until we’re rolling together, moving as one, crying out together. He fills me up. Even with the condom on, I feel full, like his essence is in me, making me feel whole.

  I don’t need Liam to make me whole, but I like that together we’re one. It’s nice to have that right now, to be a part of someone, and I’m not just talking physically, either.

  He wraps his arms around me, and we lay curled into one another. As our bodies cool and our hearts begin to beat normally, he speaks.

  “You always surprise me.” His voice is gruff. He nuzzles my neck and gives me a shiver. “This weekend has been the best one of my life.”

  “Mine too,” I say.

  He squeezes me tighter. “That makes me happy to hear, Maggie. I promised you a good weekend. I wanted you to be happy.”

  “I know.” I smile. “It’s what you do, right? You’re a broker. You bring people together.”

  He laughs. “Like a heart broker?”

  Our hearts are in this. Mine is for sure. “Something like that.”

  We lay in silence for a few minutes. I listen to his breathing. Steady. Calm. I should be at peace with it all. But I’m not. My body is buzzing. I still need to know…

  I shift a little so I can look at him. “Why did you do it? I mean, really, Liam, why did you come back to the coffee shop and kiss me like that? Like you were really in it.”

  He cocks an eyebrow then shrugs. “Because…well, just because.”

  “You could have just watched over us without doing everything else. You didn’t even know me, and yet you agreed to cater to my ridiculous needs. You put up with my family and their silly games. You endured conversations with my father, a detective who wanted something from you. Something big.” That still stings a bit. I gulp. “Why?”

  He closes his eyes for a moment then opens them again and sighs. “Prison…” He rolls over, disengaging from me, his arm up over his head. “It was the worst experience of my life, as I’m sure you can imagine. Not just the loss of freedom but the loss of peace, identity in a way, too. I had to become someone different in there, an alteration of myself, in order to survive. I couldn’t go back. I won’t go back.”

  He clenches his fist. “I didn’t lie about finding you intriguing or about going to the coffee shop to see you. You’re a breath of fresh air, Maggie, and I was hooked right from the get go.” He’s looking at me now, his fingers tracing my arm.

  “So when I told you about the reunion…”

  “I didn’t know what my brother had planned at that point. When you asked me to fake it for your mom’s sake, my first reaction was to bolt. I didn’t want to get you all tangled up in my shitty life. But in the end, I just couldn’t leave you hanging when you so clearly needed a bail out. Your mom had you practically pinned to the wall that day. I knew you
were in trouble.”

  I feel my cheeks heat, and my heart flip-flops. He came back before he even knew his brother was sending someone to watch over me and Dad. He was ready to help me before it turned into a job.

  “I didn’t know you were Detective Chandler’s daughter. My brother Ronan, he missed you somehow in his research. I figured it out when I saw your mother.”

  “You could have kept walking. You could have let someone else watch over me.”

  “I couldn’t. No way.” He says it so vehemently that I can’t doubt him. “I didn’t want one of my brother’s goons laying his eyes on you, so I told Shawn I would take my girl up here and keep an eye on the detective.” He lifts my hand and kisses it. “They knew I had a thing for my coffee shop girl, so they didn’t question it. I figured I’d be saving you from your mother and keeping your family from getting in Shawn’s way.”

  “So we both got something out of this weekend.”

  “Yeah, but I got more than I bargained for,” he whispers, his hand on my cheek. “So much more.”

  My heart trips over itself at the warmth in his eyes. It’s different than the heated lust I’m used to. “My dad said that your tip will help him get your brother.”

  Liam nods.

  “And that we can’t be seen together after this. It’ll be too dangerous.”

  He nods again.

  “Our worlds are so different.” Just like he said when we were dancing.

  “The path I’ve got to take after this…” He runs his hand through his hair. “I have to help my brother navigate this situation. Cormac, he’s putting his neck on the line to save me from doing time again, and I need to make sure he doesn’t get himself too tangled up. He’s going to need me after this all goes down.”

  “You help people a lot, you know that?” My chest fills with pride and gratefulness for this man. “It’s the thing you do. You helped me in so many ways…maybe more than I was expecting. And the things you do for your brothers…” My voice cracks.

  “I never wanted to hurt you, Maggie.”

  “I didn’t want to hurt you, either.”

  He kisses me then, soft and tender, his arms around me, holding me. I’m not sure about his, but my heart is crushing in on itself. I’m feeling like there’s this guy, this perfect guy, who is so wrong for me and yet so right.

  There’s a knock at the door. “Kids, you need to come down. Grandma’s looking for you.”

  Time’s up.

  Liam’s body tenses, and he pulls away from me. “I have to go.”

  I feel tears burn the back of my eyes and look away from him. Why my heart is acting this way, I can’t say. It’s foolish, right? I barely know this man.

  We dress in silence. I have no appetite. The thought of going downstairs without Liam is unappealing.

  When we open the door to the room, my dad is waiting there. He’s got his phone in his hand, which he waves at Liam. “The Sox are winning.”

  I frown. The Sox aren’t playing today.

  And since when do Liam and Dad talk sports— Oh. Right. Yeah.

  Liam takes my hand. We all go down the elevator together.

  When we hit the lobby, Liam leans in and kisses my cheek. “I gotta go.” He nods to the doors.

  Jimmy, the driver who brought him to my place, is standing there. “Mr. Walsh, we have a situation.” He clears his throat. He looks at me then back to Liam. “An urgent situation.”

  There’s another man standing by the door watching us. I feel Liam tense.

  “Everything okay, son?” Dad drapes his arm over my shoulder. I can feel how tense he is, too. I know this is all part of some plan him and Liam have. That Jimmy is playing some role that they anticipated.

  Liam moves to shake my father’s hand. “Nah, sir. That’s my cousin, Michael, over there. We’ve got some family business to take care of. Thank you for a wonderful weekend.”

  He starts to turn away and then hesitates and turns back before pulling me into his arms and kissing me fiercely.

  I’m breathless when he parts from me, and I stand there staring after him as he walks away.

  I will never see him again. With each step he takes, I know this for certain. I want to chase after him. I want to tell him not to go.

  My dad slips his hand in mine. “Sweetie, let’s get you some food. Your mother won’t be happy until you eat.”

  Liam, Michael, and Jimmy leave, not a glance behind them. The doors close, and Liam is gone.

  I look up at my dad but can’t help the tears from brimming over. “I didn’t mean to fall in love with him.”

  “Aww, sweetie,” he coos as he wraps me up in his big bear arms. “Things happen the way they’re meant to happen. Liam’s a good guy to lose a piece of your heart to. We all do it, give bits of our hearts away here and there. When the right person comes along and all the things align, your hearts will join and be whole, and this won’t hurt as much as it does now.” He pulls me closer and whispers in my ear. “I’ll make sure nothing happens to him.”

  …

  It’s a few hours later when a couple of my father’s non-official work friends show up. I know they’ve spent time undercover. I don’t know how I know, but I do. Their appearance looks casual on the surface of things, but I can tell that this visit has everything to do with business, which means it has everything to do with Liam’s family.

  Dad excuses himself and heads for the balcony. I get up and follow then stand and watch from the doorway as he and his friends are head to head in deep conversation. I’ve watched my dad have conversations like this my whole life. Whatever has happened, it’s gone his way for sure. He’s squaring his shoulders, and his hands are flexing open and closed, like he’s just absorbing all of the information before he launches his series of questions. Whatever has happened, it’s huge.

  “Dad?” I can’t help it. I have to know. Is Liam okay? Is he going back to jail?

  My dad looks up at me. He nods once. A simple gesture but one that strangely gives me comfort.

  Liam is okay. Dad is going to take care of things.

  A few more shared words among the men and then Dad is walking toward me briskly. He swoops me under his arm and walks me back inside. “I have to go, honey. Shawn and Cormac Doyle have been arrested.”

  Liam’s brothers.

  “Liam’s at the police station with the family’s lawyer demanding to speak with me.”

  “What? Why would he do that? I thought he was going into hiding—”

  “He knows what he’s doing, honey. Trust me. There are things that need to be done so that Shawn thinks Liam is on his side. There are things that need to be in place so we can get the information we need from Cormac. We’ve got Shawn, Maggie, but not unless Cormac cooperates.”

  And then it all clicks for me. “Cormac is going to make a deal, isn’t he?” That’s what Liam is doing. He had to go back with Jimmy so it looked like he knew nothing about the arrests. He had to get the family’s lawyer because that’s what is expected by Shawn. He has to look like he’s doing whatever he can to keep his brothers out of jail. And that means treating my father as an enemy, which means for all intents and purposes, I’m the enemy now, too. As much as I understand the reason behind it, the idea of being seen that way, even pretend, by Liam sucks.

  I hold my hand on Dad’s arm. “But how will you keep Cormac out of harm’s way? I mean, if he snitches, Shawn will do something to him for sure. You saw Liam’s face, right?” Shawn doesn’t seem like the kind of guy to let Cormac get away with it. Even if he’s locked up.

  Dad pats me on the hand. “We’ve got this, Maggie. I promise. Cormac won’t see the inside of a prison. Not with the deal I’ve got in the works for him. He’ll be safe, and so will Liam. You just have to give it some time, okay?”

  I watch him walk away. I watch him explain that he’s got
to leave to my mom. I watch how disappointment and then understanding and acceptance flash on her face.

  She married my dad with eyes wide open. She knew that there would be sleepless nights because of worry; she knew that there would be times when he’d miss family events and when he’d come home so beat that he’d sleep through holidays. She knew what she was signing up for, but she did it anyway. Why? Because that’s what love does to a person—it makes you accept the things you can’t change and gives you the power to change the things that seem impossible to get past.

  A new determination washes through me.

  My whole life I’ve been putting everyone else’s needs ahead of mine. I made sure Amelia and Charlotte felt supported and sacrificed my own feelings time and time again. But not anymore.

  I don’t want to miss out on that with Liam. Somehow, someway, I’ll get him back in my life.

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

  Maggie

  It’s funny how vacations can sometimes be more exhausting than just staying home. As I trudge my luggage up to my loft and slowly dig my keys out of my pocket, I can’t help but feel like I’ve been away for months instead of days. So much has happened. So much has changed.

  “Miss Chandler!”

  My door swings open before I can even get my key in the lock, and my landlord is on the other side.

  “Mr. Rocco, what’s going on? Is everything okay?”

  He helps me with my suitcase and ushers me inside.

  The smell of paint hits me first. I sweep the main room and notice that there are tools and bins neatly piled in the kitchen.

  “I was hoping to be finished by the time you got back.” Mr. Rocco puts my suitcase by my bedroom door then motions to the ceiling. “I have some guys working on the roof. Those leaks you’ve been having won’t give you any trouble after today.” He smiles. “You notice the heat?”

  As soon as he says it, I do notice that the usual chill of my loft is gone.

  He’s smiling and nodding. “I fixed the thermostat and also had the chimney cleaned so you don’t have to worry about smoke coming in here no more.”