Luke nodded. “Yes, it is, and we all pretty much need each other in one way or the other, don’t we?”
“That’s what family is all about. And family don’t always mean blood kin.” Tootsie’s mouth turned up in a slight grin. “Don’t ever think that I don’t need every one of y’all to get me through this hard time. Without you four kids, I’d probably go batshit crazy.”
“Aunt Tootsie, there isn’t a single one of us who can lay claim to bein’ a kid,” he chuckled.
“To me, you’ll always be a bunch of kids,” she said. “And I’m grateful for every one of you. Now let’s get my things together and take them inside before the girls come out here in force to see if something’s wrong. Are you going to be okay in this motor home all alone?”
“Hey, I’ll be just fine. Don’t worry about me, Aunt Tootsie. I’ve got the biggest place of all of us, but I do plan on coming in and out the back door and using that bathroom so we don’t have to take this monster thing to a dump site every few days,” he said.
“Good idea. We never lock the doors when we’re out here, so that won’t be a problem.” She twirled her seat around and started toward the back bedroom. “I changed the sheets this morning, so this room is yours until we leave.”
“I can use a twin bed.” He followed her down the narrow hallway.
“Nonsense.” She picked up Smokey’s picture and a small jewelry box from the dresser. “You’ll use this room. You can carry the suitcases into the house for me, and thank you, Luke, for coming out here with me.”
“My broad shoulders are available anytime you need anything,” he told her as he picked up the baggage and started outside.
Carmen was busy hanging her clothing in the antique armoire in the room to the left of the hallway when her phone rang. She saw Eli’s face appear on the screen and left the door hanging open to rush to answer it.
“Hello.” She crossed her fingers like she did when she was a little girl and wanted something badly.
“Have you thought about signing the papers?” His tone left her feeling like she was talking to a complete stranger.
“No, I haven’t, and I’m not going to until we get some couple’s counseling.” She backed up until her legs hit the bed, then sat down.
“It’s too late for that. I didn’t want to tell you this, but it seems to be the only way that you’re going to understand that our marriage is over. I never meant to hurt you. It wasn’t my intention, and Kate and I tried to walk away from the attraction,” Eli said.
“So it is another woman causing all this? Is she aware she’s breaking up a family?” Carmen’s world fractured in front of her. Permanently. Separate households.
The silence was so heavy that it seemed to suck the oxygen right out of the air.
“Are you still there?” Eli asked.
“I’m here,” she answered.
“Kate knows about you and that we have a daughter. We tried to fight it, but about six months ago, we gave up and followed our hearts,” he said.
“You were sleeping with her when you came home the last time!” Carmen yelled at the top of her lungs.
Joanie and Diana hurried into the room and sat on either side of her. Carmen hit the button to put it on speaker.
“It wasn’t easy on me, either. Lying there with you and wanting to be with her,” Eli said.
“For the love of God!” Carmen’s voice got even louder. “Why didn’t you just tell me then? This is downright cruel! I can’t believe you’re telling me this.”
“You need to understand that it’s over and just sign the papers,” Eli said. “And I didn’t tell you then because I wanted to wait until Natalie had graduated.”
“She’s been out of school four months,” Carmen reminded him.
“Yes, but then she was going into the service, and it was easier just to let things go until she left,” he said.
“And you wouldn’t owe a bit of child support, right?” Carmen asked.
“I’m not that person,” Eli protested.
“No, you’re just the bastard who sleeps with his wife and wishes he was with his girlfriend,” Carmen said.
“Call me what you want,” Eli said, “but just sign the damn papers.”
“So tell me about Kate. Is she younger than me? Prettier than me? Better in bed or maybe smarter?” Carmen’s voice broke.
“I’m not going there with you,” Eli said.
“Why not? You made love to me and wished it was her, so why not tell me more about the woman that you brought to our marriage bed?” Her voice sounded downright cold even to her own ears.
“I didn’t bring Kate—” Eli started.
“If you wished you were with her when you were with me, then it’s the same thing. How many more women have you slept with and then fantasized about when you were in bed with me?” Her voice raised another octave or two.
A dead silence told her that her fears about those nights he went to the gym just might be true. “Answer me! When did you start cheating on me?”
“When you were pregnant with Natalie,” he said.
“How many have there been?” she whispered.
“Come on, Carmen. I’m not going there.”
“Did Gerald and Brett know?” Her voice quaked.
“Some of the time,” Eli said. “They’ve known about Kate from the beginning. Now will you get the papers signed?”
“You got her with cheating; then you can lose her the same way. What makes you think this will work anyway?” she asked through clenched teeth.
“I’m retiring. Kate’s enlistment is up, and my twenty is in. I’m doing things different this time. I love her like I’ve never loved anyone, and we’re both ready to settle down.”
Carmen hung up on him, threw the phone on the floor, and fell backward onto the bed. “Did you know about this, Joanie?”
“I didn’t,” Joanie gasped. “I swear to God, I didn’t. Brett didn’t tell me. Lord, I hope I’m not next in line. I’m sorry. This isn’t about me. What are you going to do now?”
“I don’t know. I can’t imagine telling Natalie that her dad wants to divorce me. Now all this? I’m glad she can’t have mail or phone calls right now.” Carmen sat up and then stood. “Right now I hate him. I mean, I really, really hate him. If I had those papers in front of me, I’d sign them just to get him out of my life.” She began to pace the floor. “He slept with me and felt like he was cheating on her. That’s basically what he said, isn’t it?”
Diana nodded. “That’s exactly what he said. Even Gerald wasn’t that harsh when he told me he’d been seeing another woman. I always liked Eli, but I’d better never lay eyes on him again, or I just might do something that will land me in jail.”
“Where is the mad-as-hell step in that grieving process y’all’ve been talking about?” Carmen asked. “I think I found it, but I’d like to know how many more of these steps I have to endure until I get to the end.”
“Two, but if you’re really determined, you can bypass the depression one.” Diana stood with her and gave her a hug.
“Right now I’d like to bypass however many miles it is to where Eli and Kate are shackin’ up and beat the shit out of him with an iron skillet,” Carmen said.
Tootsie huffed and puffed as she entered the room. “I heard a man’s voice. What’s going on?”
Diana filled her in while Carmen continued to pace from one end of the bedroom to the other.
“Sorry sumbitch,” Tootsie growled, “telling her all that on the phone.”
“Coward is the word you’re lookin’ for,” Diana whispered.
Tootsie sat down on the edge of the bed to catch her breath. “He should have told her when he was home last. You’ve got fifteen minutes, Carmen, to throw your hissy. Go out in the yard and shake your fist at the heavens. Damn him to hell on a rusty poker. Whatever it takes, but when the time is up, you have to move on.”
“Why? I want to be mad for a long time,” Carmen said.
“Because he’s got power over you when you let anger eat away at your heart, and he shouldn’t be given that kind of control,” Tootsie said. “It’s not easy, but that’s what you have to do.”
“Did you go through this when Smokey died?” Carmen’s mouth was so tight the words could barely get out.
“Yes,” Tootsie admitted. “And one night I went outside, stomped and cussed like a sailor, beat the hell out of a metal trash can with a baseball bat, and was about to start in on the motor home when I realized what I was doing. You want a bat?”
“I live right next door to you, and I didn’t hear any of that,” Carmen said.
“I waited until y’all were all gone. It’s two miles to the nearest neighbor out here, so if you want that bat, it’s in the garage. Just don’t use it on Smokey’s pickup truck. The trees, the horse apples—all fair game. There’s also an ax out there and a bunch of logs out back that could use chopping into firewood. Don’t reckon you know how to do that, do you?”
“I was raised out in the country, and all we had was a woodstove to heat the house in the winter. I’ll be back in time for supper.” Carmen stormed down the stairs and slammed the kitchen door behind her.
“You think one of us should go with her?” Joanie asked.
“No,” Tootsie answered. “This is something she needs to work out for herself. We can support her, but she needs to get that anger out.”
“Did you really work over a trash can?” Diana asked.
“Oh, yeah, and I felt better when I got done. What did you do?” Tootsie threw the question back.
“I broke every plate in the cabinet throwing them at Gerald’s picture hanging on the wall. Then I cleaned up the mess and went out and bought a whole new set that he had never eaten off of. The next day, I threw my mattress on top of my van, took it out in the country to a landfill, and set fire to it. No man has slept in my bed since then,” she said.
Joanie sucked in air so fast that it made a whistling sound. “You mean you’ve been celibate for five years?”
“I didn’t say that,” Diana said. “I said no man has slept in my bed. There have only been a couple men since then, and one night in a motel was all I needed to see that I didn’t want to see either of them again.”
“But I swear right now, and you can get out a Bible for me to lay my hand on if you want to, that I’m finished with the army family parties.” Joanie hit her fist against her palm. “Brett can go without me if they have a barbecue or a picnic. It was tough enough to go when Gerald brought in his new woman, but you asked me to do it to be there for Rebecca. This time the girls are grown, and I don’t have to endure seeing those two with their new women.”
Tootsie stood up and headed for the door. “Y’all get unpacked while Carmen is out there choppin’ wood or beatin’ up a trash can. Sissy put a pot roast she cooked for us in the refrigerator for supper tonight, so we don’t have to cook. Luke says he’ll make some biscuits and a salad, and I can make a pretty decent pitcher of sweet tea, so we’re all set for when Carmen comes back inside.”
“Yes, ma’am.” Diana headed back toward her room. “And, Tootsie, don’t come runnin’ up those stairs like that again. You scared the bejesus out of me the way you were all out of breath.”
“I thought someone was attacking Carmen. The bad thing is that I forgot to grab my pistol,” Tootsie threw over her shoulder as she started downstairs—a lot slower than when she’d come up them.
“Did you really do that with the dishes and the mattress?” Joanie asked as she followed Diana into her room and sat down on the bed.
“Yes, I did, and I gave all his clothes to Goodwill. He was so mad when he came for them that it made it worth the time and energy it took.” Diana smiled at the memory of the fit.
“Did it really help you get past all the pain?” Joanie asked.
“A little bit, but then that damned week of depression hit. Remember that?” Diana hung up her things in the armoire and filled the empty dresser drawer with her underwear and nightshirts.
“God, I hope I never have to go through this kind of thing, but I’m terrified now that it could happen to me.” Joanie barely got the words out of her mouth when her phone rang. She darted across the hallway and grabbed it from the nightstand.
“Brett, I’m so glad you called. Tell me you love me,” Joanie whispered.
“I love you, darlin’,” he said. “I just talked to Eli. How’s Carmen holdin’ up?”
“She’s outside working out her anger on a pile of firewood. She’s got an ax in her hands, so maybe it’s a good thing that Eli is a million miles away,” Joanie said. “Now tell me you’re never putting me through this kind of hellish nightmare.”
“You know me better than that.” She could hear him smile. “I love you, Joanie.”
“Gerald loved Diana at one time, and Eli loved Carmen. Things change,” she said.
“Since Carmen is out chopping wood, I take it y’all are in Scrap, wherever the hell that is, now?” Brett changed the subject.
“We’re here,” Joanie answered. “We’re just getting unpacked and settling in. Diana, Carmen, and I have bedrooms on the second floor, but we have to share a bathroom. It has one of those old claw-foot tubs in it that I can’t wait to get in with some bubbles and bath salts.”
“Is Tootsie staying in the motor home?” His voice sounded kind of distant, as if he didn’t really want to talk to her. Was it possible that he’d seen women in the past or maybe was stringing one along now? Was she in the bathroom taking a shower while Brett called her?
“No, she has a bedroom on the ground floor. Luke has the motor home now.” She eased the bedroom door shut. “I think Diana may be attracted to him.”
“It’s about time she moved on with her life,” Brett said.
Did his comment mean that he was moving on with his—without her? Her chest tightened at the idea. He’d never given her reason to believe he was cheating, but then Carmen hadn’t a clue, either, until the divorce papers were dumped in her lap.
“He’s seven years younger than she is,” Joanie whispered.
“That’s nothing. Kate is fifteen years younger than Eli,” Brett said.
Sweet Jesus in heaven! Was Brett defending Eli because he was seeing someone?
“Holy crap on a cracker! That means she was just a little girl when Natalie was born. That ought to go over like a dead mouse in the church punch bowl with his daughter,” Joanie said.
A long silence on the end of the line made Joanie hold the phone out from her ear to make sure she hadn’t lost the connection. “Are you still there?” she asked.
“Eli didn’t tell Carmen that Kate is only twenty-five, did he?” Brett asked.
“No, just that he’s leaving the service when his enlistment is up. Retiring so he can be at home with Kate and do things different this time,” Joanie said.
“It’ll be easier on Carmen than it’s been for Diana . . .” Brett let the sentence hang in the air. “Kate is from Kentucky, so they’ll be living out there.”
“Well, that’s a bit of good news at least. Then I won’t be the bitch who refuses to go to picnics with her,” Joanie said.
“My time is up. Got to go on a fake mission with a bunch of green recruits. I’ll call when I can,” Brett said.
“Love you,” Joanie whispered, but he was already gone, and he hadn’t told her that he loved her. A cold chill ran down her back, and her hands went all clammy. Diana opened the door and peeked inside. “Are you all right? You’re as pale as a ghost.”
“You’re not going to believe how old Kate is,” Joanie whispered.
“After this past week, you could tell me that aliens were parachuting out of the sky and I’d believe you,” Diana said.
Chapter Eight
Carmen set an eighteen-inch log up on an old tree stump, drew the ax back, and brought it down with a vengeance. The log split perfectly down the middle, leaving two sides to fall on either side of the stump.
/> Just like my marriage, she thought as she picked up another piece of wood. This time she swung and hit a knot. The shock jarred her slim body so badly she dropped the ax. She bent forward, hands on her knees, and got hold of herself, then picked up the ax, repositioned the wood, and went at it again.
Just like me, wanting to hold on to what is already split. I’m just throwing knots in the inevitable. She swung at the log and split it this time.
Two hours later, her muscles were screaming in pain, but there was at least one rack of firewood split and ready to be stacked. She ignored her aching shoulder and arm muscles and carried an armload to the end of the house where she could see a little of last year’s wood still racked up. When that job was finished, she picked up the ax to split more wood, but the aroma of food wafting from an open kitchen window said that supper was almost ready.
She sat down on the cold ground and leaned back against the stump. Life went on. It didn’t seem to matter that her heart was broken, that she’d put her trust in a man who’d betrayed her from the beginning of their marriage. Life didn’t care about all that. It just wanted oxygen, food, and water to keep going.
“But how does it go on with a broken heart?” she muttered.
No answers fell from the cloudy skies above her. Nor did the north wind whip a few into her head. So she stood to her feet.
I can do this. I am strong. I can get over this and go on with life. My broken heart will mend. My dignity will be restored, she thought with each step toward the house.
Her dark hair stuck to her sweaty face, and she cried until she was sure her eyes were red and swollen, but once she stepped inside, she realized Tootsie had been right. She felt a hell of a lot better.
“Perfect timing,” Tootsie said when she entered the house through the back door. “Supper should be on the table in ten minutes.”
The Empty Nesters Page 10