‘Huh. It’s a bad thing when a man’s got to fight his own kids for a bite to eat.’ He sat down and grabbed the nearest bowl of food to start piling green beans on his plate.
The normal loud level of conversation resumed and Tom gave her a quick, sly wink.
For the first time that day Fee relaxed and wondered if she could do this after all.
Tom worked on seeing his family from Fee’s point of view. He’d grown up with their brash noisiness so it all went in one ear and out the other, but she was an only child with almost no family so it must be overwhelming. She’d spent her career observing people from the outside and the sense of separateness wrapped around her had intrigued Tom from the beginning. He’d itched to find out what made her tick underneath the remote exterior and got a kick out of discovering the passionate woman she kept well hidden.
‘Are you doing okay?’ He kept his voice low and reached for her wrist to play with the simple silver bracelet she’d chosen in one of the small gift shops in Norris.
‘Maybe.’ She glanced down at her new jewellery. ‘It’s pretty isn’t it? I don’t do pretty.’
Her wistful explanation tugged at something deep in Tom. ‘I don’t know why.’
Fee’s eyes darkened. ‘It’s nothing earth-shattering.’
Getting you to open up is worse than hacking an oyster shell with a blunt knife. His mother clapped her hands and everyone paid attention.
‘Kids, off you go to play. The ladies are going to sit down in the other room while the men do the dishes. I’ll serve dessert afterwards. Any questions?’
We wouldn’t dare. Tom noticed Fee frown. ‘Don’t worry. They won’t bite. I’ll get through as quick as I can and come join you.’ She gave him the same determined stare he’d received yesterday when he implied brandishing a knife at a murderer’s neck might not be smart.
‘I’ll be perfectly fine. Go and do your cleaning duties.’
‘Yes, ma’am.’ Underestimating Fee wasn’t a wise move. He should have realised that by now. Tom headed for the kitchen before he could drop himself in any more trouble.
‘Feisty one, isn’t she?’ His father chuckled and gave him a hard slap on the back. ‘Good move to go for someone completely different.’
‘What are you gettin’ at?’ Tom glanced around to make sure Fee was nowhere in sight.
‘Hey, don’t take me the wrong way, son. She’s a good one and your mother’s plainly taken to her.’
Tom struggled to keep his temper. ‘I’m nearly forty-one and don’t need anyone’s approval for whatever private life I choose to have, or not as the case may be. Fee’s only here for a few weeks. You don’t seriously think she’s going to give up a top-notch career to bury herself in the backwoods of Tennessee? Or that I’d ever consider marrying again?’
Hank rested a hand on Tom’s shoulder. ‘Hey, calm down, son. We’re happy to see you smile again and if a woman did the trick then good on you. I don’t know her well but Fee strikes me as quite a gal.’
She is. Tom wondered if bringing Fee here tonight might have been a big mistake on several levels. Apart from anything else it implied a level of attachment he’d no right to assume, or even want. ‘Sorry, Pop.’ He turned away to start loading the dishwasher. Tom was certain Mikey and Sandy, who were ferrying dirty plates in from the dining room, hadn’t missed a single word. After he left, Tom would be the sole topic of conversation and he’d get interfering, brotherly phone calls tomorrow.
‘Don’t even think of skipping out on dessert or your mother will make you regret it.’ His father used his best sheriff’s voice, the one he used to keep both criminals and his own sons in line. ‘Crack on and get finished up, boys, or the Dragon Queen will be on our case.’
‘She certainly will.’ Sarah swept into the room, her gaze quickly checking around her domain. ‘I can’t believe four grown men take so long clearing up a few dishes. If I find you’ve been drinking beer and watching football on my TV you’re in trouble.’ They’d clubbed together the Christmas before to buy her a small television for the kitchen so she could keep up with her favourite soaps while she cooked. ‘I’m putting the coffee on and then I’ll find out what everyone wants. When I come back in to fix the desserts you’d better be finished.’
Tom kept his head down and finished wiping down the countertops before turning on the dishwasher. Making his escape he joined Fee but she threw him an icy stare before turning away and carrying on her conversation with Sandy’s wife. Something was bugging her but asking about it now wouldn’t be smart with too many big ears listening.
After he’d put away a large slice of his mother’s world-famous coconut cake plus a piece of chocolate pie Tom asked Fee if she was ready to leave.
‘Yes.’
The single brief word was her only response so he gave up and made his way around the room to say goodbye to everyone. They headed back outside loaded down with Tupperware boxes full of leftovers amid promises to return for Sunday supper. In the truck Fee stared resolutely out of the window, the rigid set of her body warning him off talking to her. Tom had a sulking woman on his hands and no idea what he’d done wrong.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Fee quietly seethed. How dare his family see her as nothing more than a convenient female to bring their miserable son back to life. She’d been walking towards the bathroom when she heard her name mentioned. The old adage about listeners hearing no good of themselves was true. In Fee’s mind the worst part was the fact Tom hadn’t said anything to defend her.
She sensed him sneak glances at her at regular intervals but he wasn’t dumb enough to start an argument on these treacherous roads.
‘I don’t know about you but I’m ready for an early night.’ Tom’s casual air riled her but she refused to let on.
‘Me too. I enjoyed meeting your family but I’ve had enough company for one day.’
Without a word he slowed the truck down to take the last turn into Black Cherry. Fee held her tongue as he drove past his own cabin and brought the truck to an abrupt stop outside hers.
‘Are you gonna tell me what’s bugging you?’ Tom’s quiet voice didn’t fool her. Fee caught the sliver of anger running through his words.
‘We’re happy to see you smiling again and if a woman did the trick good on you.’ As she repeated his father’s words the colour drained from Tom’s face. ‘I’m glad to have served a useful purpose.’ The instant she spoke Fee would have bitten off her tongue if she could.
‘I’m not gonna sit here and listen to you trash my family. They’re good, decent people who welcomed you into their home and don’t deserve your scorn. I might, but they don’t. Let’s go inside and sort this out once and for all,’ Tom challenged.
‘I honestly am tired.’ Fee wasn’t lying and hoped he’d at least understand that much. ‘How about we leave this until the morning?’
‘It’s your choice. I hope you sleep well.’ His restraint was far more intimidating than being shouted and yelled at. If she didn’t get away now she’d be tempted to soften towards him.
Fee reached for the door handle and for the first time he didn’t run around to open it for her. She made her way towards the cabin steps and didn’t dare to turn back around as she unlocked the door. Once she stepped inside Fee allowed herself to breathe again. She couldn’t allow herself to think any more tonight or she’d go crazy. Slowly she got ready for bed and crawled in between the cold sheets, shut her eyes and hoped things would look better in the morning. It couldn’t be much worse.
At three in the morning her insomnia returned with a vengeance and she dragged herself out of bed to make a mug of chamomile tea while craving good, strong coffee. She snuggled into a corner of the sofa and tucked a soft, red blanket around her cold legs, struggling not to think about how she could have been cuddled up in Tom’s bed instead. Everything about him was so solid and there. There was no pretence. No false front. Why’d you get so mad at him then? He’d never made any promises or asked her fo
r any. Did you want him to? Ever since Pierre’s betrayal she’d been scrupulous about not letting herself get away with personal dishonesty.
You don’t seriously think she’s going to give up a top-notch career to bury herself in small town America surely? Or that I’d ever consider marrying again?
Why did his casual dismissal rankle? The combination of her unstable childhood and the awful sights she’d seen around the world helped her decide long ago that marriage and children weren’t for her so why did she care if Tom never intended to marry again?
Fee wrapped her hands around her knees and rocked back and forth as large, hot tears trickled down her face.
Tom stared at the bottle of Jack Daniels. For two pins he’d go over to Fee’s cabin and bang on her door to demand she talk to him but he’d had all the rejection he could take for one night. He spread his hands on the table in front of him but all he saw was Fee stretched out in his bed this morning. A rough curse broke from his lips and he picked up the open bottle. Not bothering with a glass he took a long, deep swallow and allowed the smoky warmth to insinuate its way down his throat. The whisky pooled in the base of his stomach and eased the anger eating away at him.
Drinking’s not the answer, son.
His father spoke those words to Tom six months after Gina’s death and he’d sworn to never let it become a problem again. Tom shoved back his chair and took the bottle over to the kitchen sink. With a grimace he poured the rest of the expensive liquor down the drain, trying to picture his brothers’ horrified faces if they could see him now.
There was no point in going to bed so Tom headed out of the back door and across the yard to his shed. Inside he turned on the lights and stared at the half-finished dolls’ house waiting for him on the workbench. Lulu would be one excited little girl on Christmas morning. He’d finished the frame, walls and floor so tonight he’d work on the doors and windows. The painstaking work would be perfect for whiling away the long hours until morning. He only had about another three weeks to get it done because Mary-Jo needed the house completed by Thanksgiving so she’d have plenty of time to add the girly touches. His cousin planned to buy most of the furniture but Tom had told her he’d have a go at a few pieces.
For the next few hours Tom cut, sawed and sanded to his heart’s content before laying each section out ready to paint. A yawn sneaked out of him as the first pink slivers of daylight sneaked in and he started to put all his tools away. When everything was back in place he locked up and wandered towards the cabin.
The loud squeal of tyres on the gravel road broke through the silence and Tom glanced over in time to see Fee’s rental car disappearing out of sight. Where the hell was she off this early? That was a dumb question. No doubt she couldn’t wait any longer to reply to her father’s email and under the circumstances wasn’t going to ask him for help again.
He rubbed at the dull headache threatening to erupt and trailed indoors, pretty sure it’d be a long day.
Forcing herself to slow down Fee made a point of paying attention to the beautiful scenery around her. Trees shaded in the last colours of autumn gleamed in the pale, early morning sunlight and the hills beyond the horizon appeared to go on forever. All too soon the leaves would flutter to the ground and winter would wind its icy tentacles around the landscape until spring came around again.
Because of her mother’s itinerant lifestyle the normal markers people used to indicate the passing of another year often slipped by them. Fee had never joined in an Easter Egg hunt, dressed up for Halloween, played with sparklers or eaten hot jacket potatoes on Guy Fawkes’ Night and as for Christmas with its centuries old rituals that even non-believers enjoyed? Most years the 25th of December was little different from any other day. Was she foolish to have believed – however briefly – that a man who took these things for granted could ever really settle for someone who saw them as nothing more than a cultural curiosity? Or could she let loose the part of her that longed to share those common experiences?
Right now she could just keep driving and see where the road took her, the philosophy she’d taken as her mantra the day she left home at sixteen. The few things she’d left at the cabin wouldn’t be any great loss but the idea of Tom finding her abandoned clothes and smelling her scent on them made that out of the question. No matter how they’d left things last night she couldn’t be so cruel.
She glanced at the map to make sure she took the right road towards Norris. Coming back here was part of a stupid, superstitious idea she had that it might help things to go smoothly with the man who was supposedly her father. Fee parked in the empty street and stared at the small, unlit building. Idiot. Why hadn’t it occurred to her that the cafe would be closed at six in the morning? She’d check to see what time they opened and go for a walk while she waited.
There was a refreshing chill in the air reminding her that tomorrow was the first of November and Fee reached back into the car for the well-worn blue sweatshirt she’d hauled around the globe for years, tugging it on as she walked up the narrow path to the cafe. Fee stopped to smooth her hair back into place and was surprised to realise it grazed the collar of her white shirt. Sometimes Pierre would laugh and call her his boyfriend, making fun of her refusal to wear make-up and her total disinterest in clothes. She’d laughed along with him until she’d met his glamorous Parisian wife and realised she’d only ever been a diversion from his real life.
I’m a plain man, Fee Winter. I’ve never been one for fuss of any sort.
Tom’s words sneaked back into her brain and she wondered if she was the one complicating things. He’d been honest with her from the beginning. As soon as she got back to Black Cherry she’d talk to him. Life was too short and precious to waste in misunderstandings.
‘We don’t open until seven, hon.’
Fee startled as the middle-aged bleached blonde who’d served them yesterday appeared at her shoulder. ‘Oh, thanks. I’ll wander around town for a while.’
‘Desperate for your morning coffee fix?’ The woman’s welcoming smile forced Fee to be honest.
‘No, I never drink coffee. I’m really here to use your Wi-Fi … although I do intend to have breakfast.’ She didn’t want to give the impression she was taking advantage without intending to give the cafe any business.
The woman smiled. ‘Come on in. I’m Brenda by the way. You can do your emails and whatever while I get the coffee on and start cooking.’ Fee was ushered inside before she could protest and settled at a prime seat by the window. ‘You have a look over the menu while I get organised.’
She did as she was told and selected scrambled egg whites with turkey sausage and Earl Grey tea. Left alone while Brenda bustled around in the kitchen she fished out her tablet and logged on. With Allain Dupre’s message open Fee worked on composing a reply.
The cluster of bells hanging over the door chimed and she glanced up to see Tom standing there, haggard and grey-faced.
‘We’re not open yet, love, but you might as well come in too.’ Brenda’s shrewd glance at the two of them turned into a knowing smile. ‘I’m guessin’ you’re together?’
He raised an eyebrow in her direction.
Fee nodded and gestured to the chair next to her. She kept her face blank and unrevealing while smiling inside. He wouldn’t expect her to make this easy and she had no intention of disappointing him.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Tom considered turning right back around and walking out but before he could move the corner of Fee’s mouth twitched and he realised she was struggling not to laugh. Witch. If she needed him to grovel he would. Whatever it took.
Ten minutes after she left Black Cherry he’d decided to go after her whether she wanted him to or not. He’d told himself it was because he thought she might get lost but deep down he knew that was a load of bull.
Tom pulled out a chair and sat down.
‘Give me your order too, hon. It won’t be long until the grill’s hot.’ The waitress gave him the sympat
hetic look he often received from older women who recognised a sad excuse for a man when they saw one.
He quickly scanned the menu. ‘A couple of sausage biscuits, two eggs over-easy and a double order of hash browns please. And coffee.’ The woman hurried off and he was left alone with Fee.
‘Afraid I’d lose my way?’ she asked with a sly smile. ‘Don’t answer you’ll only incriminate yourself.’ Fee thrust the tablet at him. ‘Now you’re here you can read that. Tell me if it’s okay before I send it.’
Without saying a word he scanned over the email. To his surprise she’d agreed to visit Allain Dupre. ‘Looks fine to me.’
‘Have you ever been to New Orleans?’
He wasn’t sure whether to take her question on a simple level or read any more into it so went for straightforward. ‘Nope.’ He needed to know where he stood but second guessing her wasn’t going to help his quest.
‘Right.’ She dragged out the word. Glancing back down she touched the screen and sent her message. ‘That’s done.’
Tom reached across to cover her hand with his own. Her slim, cool fingers always felt fragile to his touch although he knew that was far from the truth.
‘Thanks.’
‘What for?’ he asked and her blue eyes appraised him. Tom caught a hitch in her breath before she spoke.
‘Coming to find me even though I might’ve told you where to go.’ The crisp, curt words made him smile. ‘Sure of yourself, were you?’
‘Hardly,’ Tom scoffed. ‘After last night I wasn’t sure you’d even speak to me and having seen you in action with a dangerous knife … let’s just say I considered wearing a Kevlar vest in case you decided to give me a taste of Randy Watling’s medicine.’
She burst out laughing and the girlish sound warmed his heart.
‘I overreacted and I apologise.’ Her frank admission stunned him. ‘I thought about it from your family’s point of view later and realised they were simply pleased to see you more … contented.’
Christmas at Black Cherry Retreat Page 13