by J. P. Comeau
Anything with alcohol in it.
“Look,” I said as I took a sip, “I just haven’t found someone I want to have sex with yet. I don’t want to have sex simply to say I’ve done it. I want it to mean something. I want it to be special. And I sure as hell don’t want to regret it.”
Roxy nodded. “That’s a good goal. Lord knows I regret my first.”
Karina’s lips parted in shock. “Wait, you regret Allen?”
Roxy shrugged. “I didn’t even get off. And, he didn’t give a shit about me. I figured that out later on.”
“But, the two of you dated for--.
“Can we focus? Just for once, can this not be about you two after the entire restaurant has been privy to my secret?”
Roxy grinned. “Hey, you’re the one that yelled it.”
“Because you two wouldn’t shut up about it.”
Karina walked her chair around the table and sat down beside me.
“You’ll know when the time is right, Kelly. Trust your gut, and nothing can go wrong.”
I licked my lips. “I know, I know. And that’s what I’ve been doing. It’s just that the guys I find don’t seem to be interested in anything but sex. Is that so much to ask? Is it too much to ask of a guy to want me for more than what I can put out?”
“Not at all,” my sister said. “I mean, that’s how you separate the douchebags from the genuine men who want what you want.”
I clicked my tongue. “Well, it would be nice to find one of those gentlemen.”
“I’m proud of you, you know?” Roxy wrapped her arm around me.
I rolled my eyes. “Just what every virgin wants to hear.”
“No, I’m serious. You’re taking control of your own sexuality. You’re pioneering a path where you exert full control over what you want, no matter what anyone else wants. That takes serious strength and guts.”
Karina nodded. “She’s right, you know. But, just make sure you’re doing this for the right reasons.”
I gave her a sideways look. “I’m sure I’m doing it for the right reasons.”
Roxy kissed my cheek. “Good. Because I’d hate for you to be doing this because you’re afraid of what it might be like.”
I snickered, but then her words settled in my mind.
“Wait, is there something to be afraid of?”
Karina shot Roxy a look. “Good going.”
Roxy scoffed. “What!? I just want to make sure she hasn’t pumped this up in her head or anything. I mean, the first time always sucks. Am I right?”
I whipped my eyes over to her. “Wait, it does?”
Karina hissed. “Will you shut up?”
Roxy hissed back. “Girl, now I’m worried about this.”
I nodded. “Yeah. And now you have me worried, too.”
My sister looked back at me. “Look, here’s the truth of the matter: adult relationships are going to require adult actions. You aren’t going to find a guy around here nowadays that isn’t looking to be intimate with someone they’re dating. Sexual compatibility is a crucial thing in a relationship.”
Karina butted in. “Though things can always be worked on and improved.”
“Right. But, I think if you intentionally lose your V-card, it’ll give you more autonomy and comfort in these dating scenarios you find yourself in.”
“Wait, are you seriously suggesting she plan to lose her virginity?”
“What? I think it’s a good idea. She gets to be in control of who takes it. She gets to be in control of the mood, where it happens, what actually happens, how the guy treats her. We give her full control of the scenario.”
Karina shook her head. “I don’t think this is a good idea.”
As my gaze volleyed between the two of them like a tennis match, I fell back into the recesses of my mind. On the one hand, the plan seemed insane. Hand-picking some guy and telling him exactly what to do didn’t seem like the epitome of romance. But, I had to admit that me being a virgin was holding me back in my dating life. At least, it felt that way sometimes. The second the guy found out I was a virgin, I never got a callback. Or a text back. Or even another date. It felt like my love life was out of control as it was, so what was the harm in taking that control back?
Would that really make me comfortable going forward in dating?
And who in the world would do that for me, anyway?
2
_____
BRENDEN
“Well, if it isn’t my favorite oldest brother!”
I greeted Clint with open arms as he stood there in Zane’s living room, stoic as always.
“Come give your middle brother a hug,” I said.
“I’m good,” he murmured and shook his head.
I wrapped my arms around the hulking military man and squeezed him tightly. Zane was chuckling as Clint grunted and groaned.
The man hated affection in all forms. Well, except one.
Let’s just say there’s a reason the ladies that have seen him at the office whisper about the size of his package. Even though I doubted it any of them had experience with him under the sheets — only in their wildest dreams. Clint was strict and never, and I mean never, mixed business with pleasure.
“Oh. I’m so glad you moved back to town,” I said as I gave him one last squeeze.
Zane pulled me away. “All right, all right. You’ve tortured the man enough for one day. He’s been here a month or two, and you act like this is the first time you have seen him since he got back.”
I grinned. “I bet he’d like it if I had tits, and today we are embarking on a new journey together.”
Clint nodded. “You don’t. So, no point. And I still haven’t given you my answer on your proposal.”
I chuckled. “Seriously, though. It’s good to see you standing and well.”
Clint nodded again. “Thanks.”
I sighed playfully. “A man of many words. I love it. Don’t you, Zane?”
He socked me in the arm. “Come on. I’ve got coffee in the kitchen.”
“Karina anywhere? I was hoping to get a peek at that growing belly of hers. How’s she doing?”
“Apart from the nausea, she’s doing great.”
“Still nauseous?” Clint asked.
I gasped playfully. “He cares. Shout it from the rooftops, Zane! Clint cares!”
Zane barked with laughter. “All right, you can cut it out now. I think you’ve tortured him enough for one day.”
“More like one lifetime,” he murmured.
I wrapped my arm around Clint’s shoulders. “So, I take it your showing up is your way of taking us up on our offer?”
He slowly looked over at me. “Get. Off.”
I held up my hands. “Okay, okay. I get the picture.”
Zane snickered. “Finally.”
We all sat down at the breakfast nook and sipped our coffee. I took stock of my brother as he gazed out the window as if he were looking for something. When I peeked over at Zane, I saw the worry on his face. Even though there were several years between them, Zane seemed to always worry about Clint. Especially, after he had enlisted long before Zane and I went off to college.
His third deployment hadn’t been kind to him.
“I decided not to re-up,” Clint said.
I sipped my coffee as Zane locked his eyes with Clint’s.
“Want to talk about it?”
Clint shook his head. “I’m good.”
“You know you have a—,” I changed the subject.
Clint nodded. “I know, yes.”
Zane leaned forward a bit. “So… have you decided what you’re going to do about our offer?”
That’s when Clint slowly looked over at both of us, glancing back and forth between us. Clint’s third deployment had changed him, and not always for the better. He had became much more stoic. Much quieter. He told us he didn’t sleep well, and when he did, he would wake himself up talking. And Clint had admitted to me once soon after he returned home, that he wo
ke himself up intentionally sometimes.
The only time I ever saw him remotely smile was when he hugged Mom.
“Security for your properties, right?” Clint asked.
I nodded. “Right.”
Zane added on. “For the properties we own, yes. But, once we sell them, your responsibilities are over. The buyer has to provide his own security, as you might imagine.”
Clint licked his lips. “What if they want my services as an add-on? Have you guys thought about that?”
I looked over at Zane with an ‘I told you so’ look. Just because Clint was a bit fucked in the head didn’t mean he wasn’t like us. The man had a mind for business, whether we wanted to admit that or not.
“Well,” I said as I looked across the table at Clint, “I suppose that depends.”
“On?” Clint asked.
“On whether or not you’d want to build your own team and create a business for yourself out here in Vegas. As I’m sure you know, security companies do very well here. Businesses, hotels, casinos, you name it. Everyone has to have building and sometimes private security for their employees. And the casinos… they usually provide their own. But there are times they sub-contract out certain tasks to independents.”
Zane nodded. “What we’re hiring you to do is secure the properties we own until we sell them. But what happens after we sell them is between you and the buyer.”
Clint threw back his coffee. “Noted.”
I crossed my arms over my chest. “You’ll be responsible for patrols, day and night. If you hire someone else to help, you’ll have to find a way to pay them. And we are assuming you will need to hire several crews.”
“You’re offering me five hundred grand a year to do this. I’m pretty sure I can afford it,” he said gruffly.
Zane picked up his mug. “That’s just for your salary. We can sit down later and do a loan for you after you get things rolling to take care of your growing security agency. But only if you find this is something you want to do long term.”
“And also, you get two weeks of half-time paid medical leave,” I pointed out.
“And the health insurance.”
Clint held up his hand. “I got it, thanks.”
I sat on pins and needles as Clint’s eyes panned back out the window. I mean, I couldn't blame him. Zane’s place was easily the most serene in all of Vegas. How the hell the man managed to create his own little slice of quiet paradise just outside of this chaos, I’d never know. And with the small feminine touches, Karina brought to the place, it made me envious of what my younger brother had.
He had a home. A gorgeous view. A wonderful woman who thought he was everything and a child on the way. He had everything I dreamed of at night. Everything I thought was just out of reach for a crazy guy like myself.
“All right. I’ll do it,” Clint said.
His voice ripped me from my trance. “What?”
My older brother looked at me. “I said, I’ll do it. I’ll take the job.”
Zane held out his hand. “Shake on it?”
“I’d rather have a contract.”
I slid it out from my coat pocket. “Like this?”
Zane held out his palm and wiggled his fingers. “You know you want to.”
I grinned. “Shake the man’s hand so he stops looking like an idiot.”
Clint smirked, but he shook Zane’s hand. And it didn’t take him thirty seconds to sign the contract and date it. It wasn’t an extensive document. We knew Clint was capable of providing high tech security that would more than meet the needs of Stonewater Realty. Hell, the man had been a Navy SEAL, for crying out loud.
Our properties would be in good hands.
“Another coffee?” Zane asked.
“Just water, thanks,” Clint said.
I nodded. “Sounds good. One for me, too?”
Zane scooped up our mugs. “Water for three, coming up.”
Then, my focus fell back to Clint. “Dude, seriously.”
He grunted. “What?”
“What’s going on? Are you really okay?”
His gaze didn’t budge from the window. “I guess.”
“Are you still seeing that therapist?”
His gaze snapped to mine. “How the fuck do you know about that?”
“You told us about it a few months back. Don’t you remember?”
His nostrils flared. “Doesn’t mean you have to bring it up.”
“That good, huh?”
“Yeah. Those VA guys are the best.” His gaze fell back outside.
I held out my hand. “Clint, if you ever want--.”
“You got a date in mind for me to start?”
I looked over at Zane, and all he did was shrug.
“I mean, as soon as you can. If that’s what you want,” I explained.
Clint nodded. “Good. I’d like a list of all the addresses of the properties the agency owns. It’ll help me get an overview of how to discreetly surveil them. I need to know where all the vulnerable spots are before I can draw up an extensive security plan.”
Zane opened the fridge. “I can have that to you by tomorrow morning. No later than nine.”
I grinned. “Which means until then, we can celebrate.”
Zane groaned. “Come on. Not another one of your parties.”
He tossed me a water bottle, and I cracked it open.
“Hey, it’s not your celebration. It’s Clint’s,” I said.
“No, thanks,” Clint muttered.
Zane held out his hand. “See? No one likes your celebrations.”
I leaned back. “Well, the joke’s on you, because my parties are amazing.”
Clint snickered. “And boozy?”
I pointed. “Was that… almost a laugh?”
Zane nodded. “I think it was.”
“This is a bad idea.” Clint shook his head.
I leaned forward. “I bet if you come out with me tonight, I’ll have you laughing by the end of it.”
Zane sipped his water. “There isn’t enough alcohol in the world.”
“Watch it.” Clint shot him a look.
“Shut up, old man.”
I barked with laughter. “Come on, look at us. The three amigos again. The three musketeers. The three wise men. The three…”
Clint stared at me. “No, no. Go on. I want to see what you come up with next.”
Zane turned to face me. “I do, too. What’s the next one?”
I palmed my hair. “You guys get the picture. What do you say? Zane, I know you could use at least one more night out before that baby comes.”
“I’m not sure Karina would want me going out, though. Especially since her nausea is worse at night.”
“Well, I’ll get her some ginger chews, and she can come with us.”
Clint’s face fell. “Seriously? Ginger chews?”
“My sentiment exactly.” Zane scoffed.
“Oh, come on, guys. Don’t tell me we’ve grown into old farts already. Here. I’ll see if the girls want to go out.”
Despite my brothers’ protests, I shot off text messages to Karina, Kelly, and Roxy. And almost immediately, I got responses back from the three of them. To which I turned my phone around and showed my brothers.
“Still convinced Karina doesn’t want to go out with us?” I asked.
Zane sighed. “Fuck you.”
“I second that.” Clint raised his water.
I slid my phone into my pocket. “Doesn’t matter, we’re all going out tonight. We’re going to celebrate Clint’s joining our team, we’re going to celebrate his life, and we’re going to celebrate Zane’s new life he’s bringing into this world.”
Zane clapped my back. “That’s actually really sweet of you. Thanks.”
“What’s in this for you?” Clint narrowed his eyes.
“Girls. What else?”
Zane rolled his eyes while Clint groaned, and all it did was make me laugh. On the inside, though, I was excited for all of us to go o
ut. It gave us a reason to bond again. It gave us a reason to catch up. Lord knows all of us needed to wind down after the craziness of the past few months, and I sure as hell needed a drink.
Especially if Kelly was going to show up.
Our flirty banter was something for the movies. The way she looked at me with those doe eyes of hers always made me wonder why the hell she had constantly turned me down in college. No matter how many times I asked her out, I never could get her to go on one date with me. That’ll do something to a man, you know. It dented my self-confidence for a long time. But, I refused to give up on her. One of these days, I’d get her to accept my offer for a steak dinner.
And maybe, just maybe, tonight might be that night.
“All right, guys. As top quality as this water is, I’m going to head back to my condo. I need to get ready if we’re going to meet up with the girls at nine,” I said.
Clint finished off his bottle and crushed it in his hand. “Where are we heading?”
Zane butted in. “Where Brenden always wants to start. Club Verona.”
Clint scowled. “What’s Club Verona?”
“Only the hottest spot in Vegas at the moment. The music is always on par, the drinks are outstanding, and the women are drop-dead gorgeous,” I told them.
Clint’s voice fell flat. “Great.”
I stood from my seat. “Cheer up, big guy. I’m sure you’ll find someone to keep you warm for the night. But, if I don’t get out of here, I’m going to be late.”
Zane snickered. “You’ll be late anyway.”
“Which is why I really need to go, otherwise I’ll be much later.”
“Just make sure you have condoms. Otherwise, your flavor of the night may have a surprise for you in a few weeks,” Clint added.
Zane laughed as my jaw dropped open.
“Was that a joke?” I asked.
Clint shrugged. “I can still make them.”
Zane held his stomach as he continued to laugh.
“Well, I look forward to many more of them tonight,” I said with a smile. “It’s good to have you back, Clint.”
He nodded. “It’s good to be alive, Brenden.”
Yes. It sure as hell was.
3
_____
KELLY