“Thanks for your help,” Trevor responded gratefully. “I appreciate it.”
Jenny nodded somewhat stiffly. “If it will be any help. I’m not sure it will make a difference at this point but I’ll at least try.” She still seemed contemplative as she turned from him to walk away.
Much later that day, after supper had been completed and the kids had scattered around the camp for their various evening activities, Trevor finally had the chance to approach Whitney as she left the clamor and chaos of the dining hall. Whitney hadn’t seen Trevor coming toward her and her features were planted downward as her dark hair swayed lightly with each slow but steady step on the path toward her cabin. “Whitney?” Trevor addressed her, his deep voice echoing softly in the growing darkness about them.
Whitney abruptly raised her head at the sound of his voice, her unreadable dark brown eyes resting on him with an almost impartial distance as she stopped to face him. “What is it?” she asked, fatigue lacing her forcibly-controlled tones.
Trevor walked toward her, noticing that she looked exhausted and spent despite the healthy glow that emanated from her now-tanned features. “Do you mind if we talk?”
Whitney appeared uncomfortable at the prospect of speaking to him and shook her dark head. “I was just heading to my cabin for the night. I’m really tired. I’m sorry but this isn’t a good time for me. It would be best if we talked later.”
Trevor didn’t let her response deter him. “I heard that you gave your notice to quit earlier today. Deborah spoke to me about finding someone to fill in for you for the next session.”
Whitney sighed in exhaustion, dropping her chin to her chest. “I did give my notice,” she slowly admitted. “I plan on quitting as soon as they can find a replacement. Deborah doesn’t think it will take long. She said there are two or three who might possibly be available.”
Trevor stepped closer toward her. “I came to try to talk you out of going. I want you to stay.”
Whitney wouldn’t meet his eyes but let her gaze drift to the subtle pink glow that barely tinged the western horizon. “Kyle Fisher had some pretty deep concerns about the reasons I did come back and how my return has affected you. He was very vocal about them last night. He obviously believes it’s best that I go and honestly, after thinking it over, so do I. I think it would be best for you and I know it would be best for me.”
“You need to understand something about Kyle,” Trevor quickly explained. “After the accident, I tried to resume my duties here at camp. I was basically sidelined for quite awhile and Kyle took over for me. He did everything he could to keep the camp running smoothly until I could get back on my feet. Because of what he did and how involved he became in my life, I believe we became better friends than most. Whatever Kyle said to you, he did it because he feels protective of me. He saw what I went through after the accident. He knows how long it took me to get over it. I believe he’s trying to protect me from something similar happening again. That’s why he reacted the way he did. That’s why he said what he said.”
“All the more reason to stick with my decision to leave, isn’t it?” Whitney calmly replied, unmoved. “With how well Kyle knows you, shouldn’t we trust his opinion?”
“Kyle didn’t understand some critical things about our past, just like you and I didn’t. I talked to Kyle last night and told him the truth about what happened with your father. He was as surprised as I was. He intends to apologize to you and express regret over how he handled the situation. He knows he was wrong. We both want you to stay.”
Whitney seemed unaffected by his explanation and her expression didn’t vary. “I’m glad that Kyle isn’t angry with me anymore but I still believe it’s best that I go. I love this place and I love the work but the other things that have resurfaced in my life seem to be spiraling out of control. I didn’t know the emotional land mines I faced coming here and I thought I’d addressed them as much as I possibly could. I was wrong. I don’t know if I’m strong enough physically and emotionally to keep sifting through these monumental issues. I’m sorry but I need to leave, for my sake if not for yours.”
“Whitney,” Trevor said slowly, stepping closer toward her. “There’s another reason I’m asking you to stay. I think we need more time to resolve our past. Don’t you finally feel that we can have some resolution to our relationship, resolution we never had? You and I were extremely close at one point and we didn’t even have the chance to say goodbye to each other.”
Whitney glanced over at him, her dark eyes still troubled. “I don’t see that my staying longer will bring further closure,” she argued softly. “We both know the truth. We’ve discussed it to the extent we should. There’s nothing more we need to say to each other. Besides, I understand that you’ve moved on. It’s common knowledge around camp that you have a girlfriend and that you and she have been close. I’ve heard her mentioned in connection with you more than once.”
“I have had a relationship with someone,” Trevor admitted, “but it’s not been exclusive. We’ve made no commitments to each other. If I may speak bluntly, that association doesn’t compare in the slightest to what you and I shared when we were together. That’s why I want you to stay. That’s why I’m asking that you do. It’s the only way we’ll have more time together. If you leave, we’ll never be able to see each other again. I’m sure you realize that.” Trevor knew he didn’t need to mention her father for them both to know the obstacles that would arise if she did return home. “Would you at least take some time to think it over? I can give you a couple of days’ leeway before I need a final decision.”
“I don’t know,” Whitney hedged, stalling.
“It’s not only Kyle that needs to change,” Trevor insisted. “I need to change, as well. You’ve been a recipient of some of my undeserved resentment and I don’t blame you for wanting to get away from it. If you do stay, I swear I’ll do my best to make it up to you and treat you like you deserve to be treated.”
Whitney stayed silent, staring at him in cautious indecision, her dark eyes wide and unsure.
“I’ll give you some time to think it over,” Trevor said as he watched the conflicting emotions cross her troubled features. “You know how I feel but I’ll respect what you believe is best if you truly believe you need to go. I’ll let you go and get your rest. Goodnight, Whitney.” He turned to walk away but he stopped abruptly at the sound of Whitney’s voice.
“Wait,” Whitney said. “Please wait a minute, Trevor. There’s something I need to say to you.” She waited patiently until he turned and faced her once more before she took in a fortifying breath and began speaking. “I ought to say this now in case I do decide to leave. It might be my only chance.” Her eyes dropped to the ground before she lifted them again. “I want you to understand that I never blamed you for what happened in the past. I never blamed you for the accident. Even when I thought you left me because of it, I wasn’t angry. I knew you would have never, ever hurt me intentionally.”
Whitney paused, letting out a burdened breath as she chewed on her bottom lip in continuing discomfort. “I’ve been thinking a lot about what happened since our talk at the hospital,” she forged on. “Now that I more fully understand the hardships of what you went through, I feel awful about what you had to face. You were pushed away and kept away from me when I know you would have helped me if you could. I realize I can never take away the emotions you felt back then but I want you to know how terrible I feel about what happened. Kyle was hard on me last night but I am glad he spoke as forcefully as he did. It helped me better comprehend the depths of your pain. I believe you were hurt in some ways more deeply than I was. You perhaps carried more wounds and scars. I hope you can finally let go of any guilt you’ve carried from our past and let it fade completely from your life. I want you to be at peace. No matter what happens between us, no matter what happens in the future, I want you to let that part of your life go. I don’t and have never held anything against you. I want you to unders
tand that.”
Trevor remained silent before he walked closer to her, not hiding the intensity of his gaze as he grasped the warmth of her thin arm with one tanned hand. “I told you I wouldn’t pressure you into staying but I take that back. I am pressuring you. Please don’t leave this camp with the way things are between us. We need more time together and I’m asking if you’ll stay. For me if not for you. Stay for me.” Trevor lifted his hand and lightly touched the tiny, thin scar on her cheek, tracing it softy with his roughened thumb. “Please,” he said before he abruptly pivoted and left her, walking directly toward his cabin.
Whitney began cleaning up after the final archery rotation the following day, glad to have a few minutes to be on her own and think through what had transpired the evening before. Despite Trevor’s impassioned plea to stay, she still felt uncertain about whether it would best if she remained at camp or not. Even after her lengthy, soul-troubling deliberations throughout the course of the exhausting day, she still didn’t know what her final decision should be. She shook her dark head, confused. She couldn’t deny that Trevor’s invitation to stay had affected her deeply. His words, the intensity of his emotion, the tone of his voice, his touch—those in and of themselves had almost been enough to sway her to remain. But she still couldn’t come to terms with all the doubt she still felt inside. Was she strong enough to handle the ramifications of a continuing association with Trevor if nothing further happened between the two of them, especially with Laura Benson returning? Would it be better to leave and walk away from everything now so she wouldn’t have to deal with any further turmoil in her life? Already she felt like an emotional wreck, hardly able to grapple with the emotional turbulence that had arisen in her life. Could she handle more?
Little had Whitney realized that leaving the staleness of her previous life to come here would thrust her neck-deep into these overwhelming, unexpected emotions. If this was “living again” and “putting the past to rest,” she had hardly prepared adequately for it. In some ways, her father had been right. There had been and would be more pain and heartache to deal with, possibly more than she could bear. Was she up to it?
Whitney suddenly stiffened when she noticed Kyle Fisher approaching her from a distance, his steady gaze locked unerringly on her features. Whitney wished Kyle didn’t feel he owed her an apology for his earlier behavior. The situation already seemed uncomfortable enough without any further complications. She forced herself to continue the task of gathering the bows and arrows as Kyle walked toward her, pretending to appear unaffected although her heart beat uncertainly in her constricted chest.
Kyle didn’t look too comfortable with the situation either but his eyes stayed riveted on Whitney’s solemn face. “I wanted to talk to you yesterday but I didn’t get the chance,” Kyle addressed her, his broad lips twisted into a forced grimace. “I believe that you have very good reason to hate me right now.”
“I don’t hate you,” Whitney quietly replied, still working as she set the arrows in their containers.
“Trevor said that you gave your notice to quit. He said you intended to go home after this session.”
“If I’m causing as much trouble as you claimed I have been then I thought it would be best. I thought it would be best for everyone involved—including me.”
“I’m sorry about what I said to you and for how I handled the situation,” Kyle roughly apologized. “I handled the situation poorly and I behaved badly. I know I didn’t understand the circumstances adequately to be accusing you like I did.”
“I don’t see how you could have known any differently,” Whitney responded unaffectedly. “No one did.”
“It sounds like Trevor has asked you to stay?”
“Yes.”
“Are you thinking about it?” Kyle asked.
“I’m considering it but I’m not sure I should,” Whitney tentatively replied. “I haven’t made up my mind quite yet.”
“I hope what I said in anger won’t be the reason for your going. It was wrong of me to be as hard on you as I was. I let my emotions get the better of me, as you know I’m prone to do.”
“What you said made me uncomfortable,” Whitney admitted, stopping her work as she dropped her eyes to her feet, “but it was good for me to hear what you had to say. If anything, it helped me understand Trevor’s experiences better. I believe I recognize why you said what you did and I don’t fault you for it. I really don’t.”
“I still feel awful that I approached you with so much vehemence,” Kyle insisted, taking a step closer toward her. “I was reacting to the belief that I thought your presence would further torture him. You never called him to let him know that you were okay after the accident. You never contacted him to inform him you’d be coming. Then you suddenly show up—all fine and healthy. I didn’t understand it and I came to my own conclusions about the reasons why you came. They weren’t very nice ones.”
“I don’t see how they could have been,” Whitney responded, shrugging slightly.
“I’ve had the chance to talk to Trevor over the past couple of days and I understand the situation better,” Kyle added. “I’ve talked to Jenny, too. Jenny has been pretty upset about how I handled everything. She told me I had no idea what you were going through or what it took for you to come here. Now that I understand the facts, I feel terrible about the accusations I flung at you. They weren’t justified. You and I were friends before and I hope this doesn’t mean we can’t be friends again. I’m sorry for what I said and for my part in hurting you.”
Whitney stood quietly for several moments before she let out a slow, labored breath, dropping her shoulders from their rigid position. “Thank you for coming to me and apologizing,” she finally said, forcing herself to meet his gaze directly, “but you should know I don’t hold anything against you. Trevor told me the reasons why you were protective of him. He told me how you took over at the camp when he had such a difficult time after the accident and that you helped him through it. What you said and why you said it makes me think more of you, not less. I’m relieved that Trevor had someone to see him through those dark days. He needed you and he speaks highly of what you did for him. I’m grateful for your support and I hold no grudges. I honestly don’t. I hope you believe me when I say that.”
Kyle stood watching her after her words, his broad features studying her with renewed intensity. “I’ve been seriously debating whether or not I should share something with you and I almost decided against it. Now that we’ve had this conversation, I believe it’s best that I do. I hope it’s right that I do.”
Whitney immediately crinkled her brows, not unaware of Kyle’s deeply serious tone. She glanced at him curiously, at once on the alert. “What is it?” she asked.
“You truly have no recollection of the day of the accident when Trevor took you out on the four-wheeler?” Kyle questioned. “You have no idea what transpired during that day at all?”
“None whatsoever except for what people have told me. After what happened with my father, I have to begin to question what I’ve heard.” Whitney looked at Kyle strangely. “Do you know something I’m not aware of? Do you know something you think I should know?”
Kyle took his large hand and rubbed his roughened chin cautiously before he began speaking. “The day you went out with Trevor in the mountains—the day of the accident—was the day that Trevor asked you to marry him.”
The words were shocking enough for Whitney to feel the blood drain from her face. She placed a hand over her rapidly beating heart, feeling almost faint. “That’s impossible,” she stated, her voice almost inaudible.
“It’s true,” Kyle answered.
“But how would you know something like that?”
“Trevor told me,” Kyle replied. “He told me where he asked you to marry him.”
“Where?”
“By the spring.”
The spring, Whitney inwardly repeated. She and Trevor had loved visiting that place and had spent a great deal
of time together there. “That’s why we were up the canyon. That’s why we were out late. That’s why Trevor got distracted on the ride down.”
“Yes,” Kyle said.
Whitney became so deeply affected by the information that she could feel her insides trembling. She walked over to a nearby bale of hay and sat down, pressing her cold hands against her burning cheeks. “I had no idea. I really had no idea.”
“You do remember how close you were, don’t you?”
“Of course I remember,” Whitney confessed, still in immobilized shock. “But Trevor asking me to marry him? I have no memory of that at all.” Whitney looked at Kyle in searching, expectant questioning. “No doubt I said ‘yes?’”
“You did.”
“It’s no wonder that…” Whitney began before her words abruptly trailed off as she shook her dark head in continuing dismay.
“It’s no wonder that what?” Kyle pressed her.
“It’s no wonder that I knew I needed to come back to this place no matter how much my father fought me about it,” Whitney answered tremulously. “I had to put the past to rest. There was too much at stake. My heart must have remembered somehow. I must have somehow known.” Whitney looked at Kyle in bewilderment. “There’s still a great deal on the line—even now.”
Kyle nodded. “There is. That’s why I decided to tell you what I have. That’s why I think it’s important that you stay, especially if Trevor has asked you to. He wouldn’t ask that casually.”
Whitney sat silently for quite some time, still grappling with the ramifications of their conversation as she pressed her palms together—almost as if to make sure this was real, not a dream. “Please don’t tell Trevor I know about this. Please.”
“I won’t,” Kyle quickly reassured her. “I don’t imagine he’d be too happy to find out that I told you. It’s not something he shares lightly. Not many know. His family and I are probably the only ones.” Kyle paused, watching Whitney’s features closely. “Can you understand now why I became upset when you came back to camp, as if you didn’t care at all about what had happened that day? I thought you’d remembered. I thought you knew you two had been engaged, even if only for a few hours. You seemed flippant about all of it—almost insensitive and uncaring. That’s what I believed. That’s what I saw in your behavior.”
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