by Willow Aster
“Get up. We don’t have time for this.” He pulls me up and drags me through the trees until we come to a clearing.
He’s been moving faster than I would’ve thought him capable of a few days ago. Was he ever sick? I don’t know anything anymore. The world has tilted upside down and I’m trying to crawl back up to center, blindfolded.
A plane waits for us and I’d like to believe my father’s urgency in getting us out of the building was because I said I’d do whatever he wanted, and maybe that was part of it, but I have the worst feeling that maybe we were close to being found. He’s too rattled. And that explosion…what if someone was close? What if it was Jadon? Oh god. It didn’t sound like something anyone could survive. I put my head in my hands and try not to think about that…everything I can to push away the thought that he could’ve been in that explosion. I can’t allow myself to go there.
We’ve been on a plane for a couple of hours. He won’t talk to me, won’t tell me where we’re going…his anger is consuming him. Now, I’m beginning to see the strain in his body, the sweat along his brow, and his face is red…
“Are you feeling okay, Papa?”
“I need to think!” he yells.
I clamp my mouth shut. Closing my eyes, I force myself to calm down, thinking instead about the baby I’m carrying. It should fill me with more fear that I’m bringing a baby into this chaos, but instead, it brings me comfort.
I keep my eyes closed the rest of the flight, imagining a child with Jadon’s black hair and the bluest eyes, running around and twirling in a field of flowers.
When we arrive at our safe house on the south side of Shlovak, it’s late afternoon. The staff is there already, hurriedly moving about the house, getting everything in tip-top shape. They scuttle to the door when we walk in, the butler and his small staff lowering their heads in respect. I want to tell them not to bother, but I don’t say a word.
My father gives a jerky nod of acknowledgment and we are led to the dining room where a few things have been prepared.
“Surely you had enough time to do better than this,” my father snaps.
In the past, I would have stared at him and said, “Papa!” in admonishment if he ever spoke to our staff like that, but this time I woodenly place a few pieces of fruit and cheese on my plate, hoping my smile to the man who shakily sets out a small platter of sandwiches is thanks enough. I grab a sandwich and smile at the man again; he just stares at me with wide eyes.
A plate clatters and my father points at a woman who has just walked into the room. “What is she doing here?” he barks and the other three staff members stop and stare.
“This is Lydia,” the butler says. “She came to help us prepare.”
“I’ve given strict instruction that there are no women allowed on my staff. Ever,” he spits out. “Leave.” He points at the woman. “Now.”
“I’m so sorry, sir. We needed the extra hands to be ready in time and Lydia is more than cap—”
My father lifts his hand and the man stops. “See her out and then you are free to go as well. We will make do with the two left here.” He nods to the two men who haven’t said a word since we got here and they nod back.
The butler and Lydia leave the room quickly and I stare at my father, waiting to see what he’ll do next. Part of me wonders if he’s lost his mind with the poisoning, but no…I think this must’ve been somewhere in him all along. Maybe my challenging him is forcing his sins to the light, but more than likely, my opinions still don’t weigh in on his behavior. His walls are closing in, with or without me.
“Sit down, Delilah. Eat. We need to figure out our next move.” He points at the table and I sit down, warily watching him take the seat across from me.
I don’t have much of an appetite, but once I start eating the cheese and a bite of the sandwich, some of it comes back.
The men still lingering clear the room and come back in with wine. I shake my head and ask for water and one of them returns with a jug.
“I think there’s a way for us to salvage this,” Papa finally says, eventually going into a long explanation of how we’ll go about it.
I’m so tired, my eyes have a will of their own, and I wake up to him pounding on the table.
“Listen! You’ve wanted to be part of things for so long, and now that you finally have the chance, you’re drooling on your arm like a disgusting animal. Sit up, wipe your face, and listen.”
My eyes well with tears, but I wipe my mouth and make sure there’s not a tear in sight when I look at my father.
“Have you always been this terrible?” I ask.
“You must know by now that no one is all good or all bad, dear. Even your precious Jadon, who you allowed to defile your body—and your name—is human…and a sub-par one at that.”
“At least he hasn’t been hiding who he truly is from his daughter her whole life. He lives honestly.”
Papa laughs and tilts the wine glass back, swallowing the rest of the contents. “You are so naïve. Always have been. Your brother was always one step ahead of you. While you were playing with dolls and combing your hair, he was talking war strategies. Even Caulder, fool as he was, was always more capable than you’ll ever be.”
“Have you ever wondered if Omar’s drowning wasn’t really an accident? We were all there together, but Caulder was closer to him in the water that day. What if Caulder has systematically been trying to kill all of us off so he could become king?”
His face darkens. I can tell he’s going through the events of that day again, the way I have over and over through the years.
“I think perhaps he’s played us all,” he finally says.
“Except I’m the one who realized it. Maybe I am capable of something.” I sigh. It doesn’t feel any better to know the truth. “Why did you pretend to love me? Why not just show me who you really were from day one?”
“But I do love you. I’ve always loved you. And it was much easier to keep you occupied if we played nice.” He laughs, wiping his mouth with his hand. “It was also nice having a woman’s touch when I was sick,” he admits. “You remind me of your mother, how caring you are when you’re taking care of someone.”
“Were you really sick though, or was Caulder just poisoning you this whole time?” I throw my napkin on the table, disgusted by the whole conversation. “You know what, don’t bother answering. I can’t believe how long I worried about you, how devastated I was that you were sick…whether you were sick or poisoned doesn’t matter…our kingdom would’ve been better off if you hadn’t survived.”
He slams his glass down, the look in his eyes making me want to crawl under the table, but I don’t back down.
“You need to watch your step, Princess. I’ll let your insolence slide since we’re having this overdue heart-to-heart. We’ll have to work together, you know.” He pours more wine in his glass and lifts it, pointing at me with his index finger. “I didn’t know Caulder was poisoning me until recently,” he says quietly. “Have to say I’m fucking impressed. He was trying to kill me the same way we took out King Forbrush…it was really quite clever. And it was supposed to be the young King Safrin next…through his stepmother. The fact that he wanted my position made him clumsy, but that’s the kind of person we need on the throne. Someone who will fight for Alidonia and the other kingdoms at all costs.”
Now I am crying and I don’t bother to hide it because he wouldn’t think any less of me than he already does. I’m already the scum on the bottom of his shoe.
“Why? Why would you kill King Forbrush? Or Jadon?”
“The same reason I helped Titus kill Jadon’s father…” He finishes his second glass of wine and pours another. “I don’t just want to rule Alidonia, Delilah. I want all of the kingdoms to bow down to me, King Farthing of all.”
“You disgust me,” I spit out. I push away from the table, standing on shaky feet, and walk to the door.
“I’ll refresh you on the plan tomorrow, after you’ve slep
t…you’ll learn to love me again, Delilah. Your mother did, and so will you. Sometimes the worst of us has to come to light before we can move on and truly learn what love is. I see the worst in you, and I still love you.” He looks at me almost fondly, reminding me of the years he looked at me just like this.
I shiver and walk out the door, as he yells louder. I put my hand on my ears and run down the hall, trying to wipe out the sound of his voice.
Chapter Thirty-Six
Jadon
Ten of Alex’s men were killed in the explosion. I attend their celebration of life, my mind full of Delilah and the possibility that she was also in that fire. I can’t—won’t—accept that until it’s proven, but my heart is sick.
I walk through the services in a fog, say conciliatory things to Alex and beg his forgiveness for my harshness in Alidonia, to which he’s gracious to say there’s nothing to forgive, and I get on my plane back to Farrow feeling emptier than ever. My phone sits on my lap and I check it relentlessly, silently begging her to reach out to me. Say even one word to let me know she’s okay. But it mocks me with silence.
Gentry stayed in Yuman to be with Alex and the family, but Ava is still in Farrow when I get home. She hugs me tight when I come in the door, her face sorrowful.
“We don’t know if she was in the explosion,” she whispers. “Don’t let your mind go there yet…okay?”
I nod, not able to form any words right now. I pinch my eyes with my fingertips and then lean back, patting her shoulder.
“I’m glad you’re here.”
“Me too. It’s been really quiet without you and Eden though…and Gentry. Basile has been moping around—what is up with him?”
“Chelsea has disappeared on him. Do you have any idea where she might be?”
Ava’s eyes widen. “No clue. Aw, that’s so sad. They were cute…in a really disgusting, groping kind of way. I seemed to always catch them at the most inopportune times.” She crinkles her nose as if remembering a particular scene and then shudders.
I smile and put my arm around her shoulder. “Have you eaten yet?”
“No. I missed dinner and hoped you’d get home so I wouldn’t have to eat by myself.”
We raid the kitchen, pulling out leftover chicken and cheese and bread. I open a bottle of wine and we eat standing next to the kitchen island like we used to when she was little. Except then, she’d sit on the kitchen counter and I’d stand nearby to make sure she wouldn’t fall.
“What if my chance at love is over?” I ask, staring into my glass. “I don’t want anyone but her, Ava. To think she might not be alive—I don’t want a world without her in it. Even if she ends up wanting nothing to do with me, I want to know she’s—”
She puts her hand on my shoulder. “Jadon, please don’t give up hope yet. I have to believe that a woman who had the guts to tell the kingdoms on live TV that she’s pregnant with her father’s biggest enemy can survive anything.”
I chuckle into my hand and then it turns into a ragged sound. “God, I can’t believe she did that,” my voice breaks. “That gorgeous little lunatic.”
“You’ve always had a weakness for lunatics.” Ava winks.
I tweak her nose and take a huge bite of chicken. “You’re right about that.”
All of the kingdoms are in a state of uproar over the disappearance of King Farthing and his daughter. Every time I turn on the news, someone is talking about it, surmising over their theories. It isn’t common knowledge about the explosion at the compound or that we suspected the Farthings were there, so that theory isn’t on the table, but no one has seen them since Delilah’s public declaration. Since she mentioned being pregnant with my baby, I’ve had reporters camped out around the property, eager to get the full scoop. If I weren’t so devastated over the possibility of her dying in that explosion, I’d get a bigger kick out of how she staged that wedding, but as it is, I’m going to lose my mind if I don’t find out something about her soon.
My guards have said there’s nothing left to investigate at the compound or I would’ve been there by now, and they’re still pouring over the laptops found at the Farthing estate. While I’m staring out the window, lost in thought, Quincie comes barreling into my office.
I glance up, surprised.
“I’m, uh, sorry, sir. I think it’s important—”
“What’s going on?” I stand up and move to the side of the desk.
He sets a laptop on my desk and motions for me to come closer.
“Take a look at this folder I found. It’s coded, but we were able to break through and figure out where the Farthings’ safe houses are. Well, at least two of them.”
I stare closely at the email and the way the numbers are turning into letters rapidly as we watch.
“Okay, maybe three now.” He grins. He taps the screen and another window opens up. “This is a map of the first two. The third would be,” he takes a closer look and taps on the map, “right about here, I think.”
“How soon can we take a team to each place?”
“I have several teams ready.” He stands up and stretches his neck and I cringe at the loud cracks that explode out of him. He shrugs sheepishly when he sees my expression. “Didn’t know if you’d want everyone to split up or if you personally want to go to each one.”
“I’d like drones to go to each location first, so we don’t have another Sulphur Springs situation.”
Quincie nods gravely.
It takes hours for the footage to start coming in. I have to get up and stretch periodically, my knees creaking from all the hours of sitting in front of the screen. After watching every minute fleck of movement, we all conclude that they’re not at either of the two locations, and the problem with the third location is that it’s hard to get a drone close enough to detect movement without being seen.
“Where are they?” I repeat over and over.
My eyes hurt from staring so hard at the screens and yet I can’t tear myself away, certain that as soon as I do, she’ll show up on the screen.
I force myself to eat a little bit and absentmindedly scratch Star behind the ears when she comes and sadly places her head on my knees.
“I know you need to walk, but I can’t right now. Sorry, girl.”
Basile knocks on the door and tries to get her to go out with him, but she won’t leave my side.
“Why don’t you get some fresh air? Even five minutes will help.” He motions for me to get up.
I stand and Star turns around and around, prancing with excitement. I groan but smile at her. “Okay, okay. Five minutes.” I point at Basile. “Don’t take your eyes off of the screens.”
“Yes, sir.” He grins and steps aside so Star and I can walk through the door.
Star’s nails click-clack against the floor and she keeps looking up at me like she can’t believe her good fortune. We step outside and she takes off running in the grass then falls over and rolls around in it. If she were human, she’d be cackling with pleasure, and I smile in spite of myself. The breeze rustles the collar of my shirt and my hair blows into my face. I pull it back, securing it with my fist.
How does life keep moving, nature continues performing, and people do their everyday tasks, without a thought of Delilah Farthing’s disappearance? It doesn’t seem possible when every heartbeat, every measured breath I take, consists of a wish, a prayer that she’s alive, that she’s unharmed, and that our baby will survive this. Star runs up to me and barks, finding a ball that we’ve left in the yard for her. She nudges the ball toward my feet and I throw it, watching her bound after it. I feel hollowed out, but I go through the motions, tossing it a dozen times, two dozen times, until she’s panting and stretches out at my feet.
“You ready to take a nap?”
She nearly knocks me over when she stands and gets on her hind feet, her front paws on my shoulder.
“Oh, now, you’re breaking the rules,” I tell her and she gives my face one lick. I wrap my arms around her and hug her,
feeling pathetic when I nearly cry. What would my kingdom say if they knew a fucking dog and a woman have finally made me crack?
“Come on, let’s get back inside. We have a princess to find. I can’t waste time getting sappy out here.”
She jumps down and we’re walking back when Quincie meets me outside, his movements as quick as I’ve seen them.
“I’ve found a fourth safe house!” His voice barrels across the yard. We move hurriedly to one another, so he doesn’t have to yell. “And I didn’t find you right away, so I went ahead and sent a drone there too.”
“Good. Where is it?”
“It’s surprisingly close to the Cave of Stars…in that region.”
We hurry inside and Basile jumps up when I come into the room, pointing at the highest screen.
“I just saw movement,” he says.
“Quincie, can you move this feed to the central screen?”
Quincie does a few quick taps on his device and the center screen fills with the fourth drone’s feed. A woman walks outside and hurries down the path, looking behind her every few seconds. It’s not Delilah, but the fact that anyone is at the house means they could be there, or they will be soon. Quincie zooms in closer to the house and there are several people inside, and a table of food. He keeps zooming and there he is, the king himself.
“Let’s go,” I tell Quincie. I message the commander who is standing by waiting for word from me. We’re ready. Basile holds onto Star so she won’t follow me as we walk out of the office and I don’t bother taking anything with me as I make my way to our landing strip.
The troops are filing onto planes out in the fields beyond our land, and I get on my own, greeting the pilot and the team on my flight. I message Luka, Eden, Gentry, and Ava in a group text as we take off.
I love all of you. If Delilah is alive, I think I’ve found her location. I’m leaving now with a few troops. My will is up-to-date, should anything happen to me. Everything is covered except for that dog who has wormed her way into my heart. Make sure she’s looked after. :)