I fell back against the bed on my back. I caved to his demanding need, because I knew he’d satiate mine. He held up my legs, resting them over his shoulder as he pounded in me.
I jerked up from the force of his thrusts. I lifted my arms up high, wanting to give myself some traction, and unwittingly rewarded myself with thrusts that landed deeper.
“Calum, Calum.” I chanted his name like a revered mantra.
He circled his hips in the way I now remembered all too well. How could I forget? That sent me shaking in euphoria, my clit burned from his fanatic urgency. I was shaking when he pulled out of me, and flipped me to my side, spooning me from behind.
I gasped in surprise. “Why’d you stop?”
“Shhh.”
His hand slid up the bare flesh of my body, before he wrapped his arms around me for behind. His cock filled me again.
“This is where I want to be.” The words were a tender hiss against my ear.
He twisted and held me sideways, tasting my lips slowly. His cock slipping in and out of me with deliberate slowness.
I was burning up. The friction heating up my insides.
I lay on my side, tenderly spooned and roughly impaled. His shallow thrusts left me wanting and needy, clawing at his hip, wanting to pull him in deeper. I shifted closer, and moaned as he came over me. My face buried into the mattress, my arms spread out and pinned as he fucked me through my hips. The daybed creaked under the weight of the thrusts. I lay there, my nails digging into the velvety fabric upholstery. I was blissfully, completely taken.
The strength of him, the depth of his cock, made me shudder and whine as another orgasm rippled through me.
“Fuck, fuck.” He groaned in my ear as he spurted his hot load inside me. The molten bursts erupted again and again, his powerful body jolting from the volcanic gushes.
His pants mixed with mine.
I stared at the wall, my cheek buried into the seat of the daybed. His cum dribbled out of me, his cock still touching my very core. His lips at my ear, whispering sweet, hot nothings, I looked out the massive opening that led out to the balcony.
The light flashed against the navy blue sky.
I was totally, completely crazy to have done this.
But I was also, in that moment, the happiest most content woman on the planet.
Calum held the front of door of the cottage open. I stepped inside and winced at the burn between my legs.
“Just in time for dinner.” Isabel beamed as she carried a tray of lasagna to the table. “Zoe and I made lasagna.’
“Oh… how nice.” I wished I didn’t look like I had something to hide. Because I sure felt like a thief. I jerked when Calum pressed a hand at the small of my back, guiding to me to the seat on the dining table.
I slid in next to Zoe’s highchair and kissed her cheek. “The looks delicious, Zoe. Did you make it with grandma?”
She kept playing with the cutlery and didn’t bother even glancing at me. Instead she smiled up at Calum.
It warmed my heart. Zoe had two parents instead of one. I had dreamt of that impossible dream and it was now her reality. Except, it was a fickle truth. Calum was destined to soon go away.
A chill ran through my body. Even though I smiled and chatted through dinner and ogled Calum with unabashed pleasure, I knew that sleeping with Calum had been a big mistake.
My phone beeped and I glanced at it briefly. Myles.
I didn’t open the message, instead I flipped my phone face down. I deserved to revel in this wonderful afterglow. Even though I knew as I lived that moment, that it would all soon end.
My continuously beeping phone was the painful reminder that wouldn’t let me forget why I was seated at a table in Newport, Rhode Island. I wanted answers.
I spent the night tossing and turning in bed.
Zoe was sleeping with Isabel, and when Calum and I had walked upstairs to go to bed, I had pointedly said goodnight and locked the bedroom door shut behind me. I wanted to go to his bed, feel his hands on me again, but I had to figure out what I was going to do about Myles.
I was at a dead end.
The next morning, I spotted the missed call from Myles. He was growing impatient about my whereabouts and news of Calum.
“Shit,” I whispered to myself.
I settled into the living room and froze.
Zoe and Calum were sitting cross-legged on the rug in the living room, playing. Calum was holding his fingers together and Zoe was squealing as she touched the tips.
A cool calm swept over me. I forgot about my Myles dilemma. I watched the picture-perfect scene of family.
Family.
A full complete family for Zoe—a dad and a mom.
I’d hoped to have that someday with Calum; however, that wish was three years old. I was young and childish back then. So childish that I had let Calum deceive me into thinking he was dead.
I wasn’t childish anymore. Why did I want this picture-perfect family again? I wanted it with a crazed frenzy that brought tears to my eyes.
I placed the phone face down on the side corner table.
Myles would have to wait for an answer.
I wanted this.
Chapter 9
Calum
I couldn’t stop thinking about Nina and Zoe.
I stood on the deck of my boat. I’d never imagined I could ever such intense physical pain as a result of my regret. I wished I’d investigated Nina’s death. I wished I’d been there when Nina gave birth to my child. I wished we hadn’t lost the last three years.
When Nina melted in my arms yesterday, it was all made worse. I could tell she still felt deeply for me… the same things I felt for her. An unexplainable lightheaded calm swept over me when she was around. As if everything was okay and perfect and complete.
I’d spent three years staring out at that same ocean, innately incomplete and hollow. Even though Nina and Zoe were here with me, they’d be gone in three days. I couldn’t offer Nina anything but a life on the run. And that wasn’t much. Nina had a full, perfect life back in New York. A great home, a flourishing business. A child.
All I had was this so-called ‘luxury’ cottage in Rhode Island, which haunted me every day. I took a long swig of my beer and lurched around at the unmistakable thud of feet landing onto the boat.
My mother squinted against the bright sun, and raised a brow. “I’m glad to find see you thinking about the mess you’ve made.”
“Which mess?” I didn’t want to talk about it.
She sighed. “You don’t see it, do you?”
I sighed. “I can’t have this conversation, Mom. I know you want me to try to convince her to stay, but there’s nothing I can do. Nina has to go back. She can’t live like this. I can’t ask her to live like this.”
Isabel came up to stand beside me. I had no choice but to glance at her.
“I’ve seen the way she looks at you. She still madly in love with you.”
I scoffed. “No. She’s…” I stalled, staring at a seagull, as I remembered the way she had melted into my arms, how responsive she’d been in the lighthouse, how she’d kissed me like she was drowning and needed my breath to survive. “She’s… not in love with me.”
“She has feelings for you, Calum. Why else would she come her with Zoe? She didn’t have to.”
“She wanted answers.”
“And did she get them?”
I drew in a deep breath. “How do I answer her questions, Mom? She doesn’t have those answers yet because I’m… stalling. I’ll have to answer soon. But… she’ll never want to look at my face. Once she finds out the truth, she’ll be out of here before I can blink twice. And Zoe?” I smirked. “Nina will keep Zoe away for me for the rest of her life. I’ll never see her face again.” My heart churned painfully at that thought.
“So, you’re planning on just avoiding the discussion. Or feeding her some lies.”
“I can’t lie to her anymore.” I admitted in a bare whisper.
“Is that why you came here? To tell me she has feelings for me? I know she does. I do, too.”
“Yes, you look at her like a lovesick puppy.”
I chuckled and my mom smiled as she nudged my shoulder.
“Tell her the truth, Calum, she deserves it.”
I ground my molars tighter at the mere thought of speaking the truth.
“The longer you keep your dark secret hidden, the more difficult it’s going to become to come forward with the truth.”
“She’ll never forgive me.”
My mom’s head rested on my bare forearm and she tapped it lightly. “You never know, Calum. But all that matters is that she’s the mother of your child, and that you still love her. You can’t just let her go without a fight. That’s not you.”
I glanced at her sideways.
She smiled ruefully. “I’m your mother, I know. You still love her, so give her the truth. Maybe, she’ll find it in her heart to forgive you. but you’re doing yourself no favors by keeping her in the dark.”
Chapter 10
Nina
I peered out the window, and spotted Calum and Isabel making their way back to the cottage.
They looked somber from the distance, until Calum hugged his mother sideways and kissed the top of her head. Mother and son smiled at one another, and I couldn’t help but grin. I’d never seen Calum in this role—a family man. He took such great care of his mother, and they were really good friends. That just made things a worse hell for me, because that made Calum all the more irresistible.
This is why he was so hands-on with Zoe. It wasn’t the novelty that made him act like a lovesick dad around Zoe. He valued family and blood and relationships. I had a feeling his connection with Zoe was stronger than I could imagine.
And me?
Technically, I was bound to Calum for the two next decades because of Zoe. I was under no illusion that what had happened last night at the lighthouse meant anything other than the fact that we still wanted each other. It was almost a purging act—the connection. The need to be naked and be close without any barriers. For old times’ sake. We’d been so madly in love, and it had ended so abruptly. There were no grudges. No bad memories. He hadn’t let me down.
Until he faked his own death and skipped town to come live here on the beautiful seaside.
I placed a plate of pancakes in the center of the table. “I made breakfast.”
“Oh, you didn’t have to darling,” Isabel said with a smile as she took a seat.
“I wanted to.” I couldn’t look away. Calum was nuzzling Zoe’s neck and she was snickering uncontrollably, her tiny hands wrapped around his neck. This man would protect Zoe with his life—I had no doubt about that. But he couldn’t stay in Zoe’s life.
He was headed for prison. The FBI on one’s trail was no game. Neither of us could change the fact: Calum was going to end up behind bars for gods knew how long. I didn’t know what he’d done for the FBI to get involved, but I assumed it had to be big. What did I know? I didn’t truly know anything about Calum.
I cut up Zoe’s pancakes for her and glanced at Calum, caught him looking at me, and suddenly glanced away.
Was he thinking about last night? I wish he was, because I couldn’t get it out of my head.
“Nina, let me take you out on the boat after breakfast.”
My brows lifted in question. “Me?”
His cautious expression gave way to a shocked grin. “Of course. We’ll get a chance to talk about… things.”
The way he enunciated the last word made my heart beat faster. I needed these answers. I wanted to know why Calum flaked on me and faked his own death. Myles was an FBI agent. If he said Calum faked to get out of doing prison time, I had no reason to not believe him. Calum would have to have some sort of mind-blowing explanation for it all to make sense.
Would I be able to trust him, though?
If he looks at you with that besotted intensity in his eyes, you might just believe anything.
I shrugged, and was suddenly paralyzed with cold dread tensing up my arms.
Did I really want to know the truth? Yes.
But can I deal with it?
Calum was feeding Zoe pancakes from his own plate. As I watched, he cradled her little head and pressed a soft kiss atop her hair.
I had to look away. My eyes glued to the phone—face down—next to my plate. I’d have to speak to Myles soon. As soon as I got my answers—which seemed like it would happen right after breakfast—then Calum would be taken away.
Zoe wouldn’t get any more sweet little kisses from her father
It had to be done. I didn’t know what Calum was capable of. Maybe once I found out the truth, it would become easier to imagine letting Calum go. To snatch him away from this seaside haven, and his mother, and his child.
Away from me.
I stood up so abruptly my thighs knocked the edge of the table. It rocked savagely.
“Sorry!” I burst out quickly, and Calum got up, carrying his plate to the sink.
I couldn’t meet Isabel’s eye, or look at Zoe. My heart was churning painfully. Maybe I could get out of this boat trip altogether. If I could stall finding out the truth, I could buy another day to spend with Calum—some more precious hours for Zoe to spend with her father.
“Let’s go?” Calum headed toward the door.
I turned to Isabel. “I don’t want to burden you with Zoe.”
Isabel almost winced. “Burden me with my own grandchild! Don’t be silly, Nina. Go on, enjoy some alone time on the boat. Zoe and I will go play outside.”
I swallowed against the dread tightening my throat. My jaw fell open when Zoe ran across the living room and wrapped her arms around Calum’s legs. Her face tilted up.
“Bye, Daddy.”
My heart thudded violently, my sight blurred as tears burned my eyes. Calum reached down and hauled her up into his arms, squeezing her against him. Her legs dangled playfully in the air.
“Bye, sweetheart. I’ll be right back and play with you, okay?”
I bit the inside of my trembling lower lip, and squeezed my eyes shut. Two tears spilled down my cheeks and I discreetly wiped them off. I had to wrap my arms around myself to stop them from vibrating. My flip flops sank in the sand as I walked across the beach, Calum next to me. He was silent, just as I was, and just as we reached the boat, I saw how emotional he was. Emotion had ravaged his face; the lines around his mouth were deeper, his jaw clenched.
“What is it?” I asked.
Moisture glistened in his eyes. “Zoe just called me Dad.”
“I know. It was beautiful wasn’t it.”
He laughed shortly and I looked away. He looked like he was going to break down. It wasn’t just me who was losing her sane marbles out here. Zoe had fallen in love with her doting father. It was almost as if he had never been gone.
Many of my friends’ husbands and partners took a hell of a lot of time to fall into the role of being father. Being a dad didn’t come naturally to everyone. Calum was a natural. He was a protector, a nurturer, and he came visibly alive when he was with Zoe.
I sat on the deck and Calum handed me a cold beer.
I took it, watching the rolling waves. “Do we have to take the boat out onto the water? It’s so nice here, just unmoving.”
He smiled shortly. “Sure.” He settled into the deck chair next to me, and I lifted my hand to shield my eyes form the sun.
“God it’s so calm here. I could live here forever.”
“Careful what you wish for.”
His grin made my heart skip a beat. That charming grin always melted my insides. My breasts grew taut, my breath turned shallow. I wanted to taste that smile, suck it right off his sexy mouth.
I had to look away.
But the memory of Zoe running over to Calum and calling him Daddy for the first-time, played endlessly in my mind.
“Do you take the boat out often?” I tried to distract myself from the thought of taking Calum’s clothes off with my teeth.
“Mhmm. It gets lonely out there at the cottage.”
I drew in a shattered breath. “So, you go out to sea to be lonelier?”
“What choice do I have?”
I bit my lip. It was time. The ideal moment for me to ask for him to elaborate.
Tell me why you faked your death? Why did you never look for me? Most importantly what did you do to have fucking FBI at your trail?
But the possibility of hearing the answers chilled me to the bone.
At the same time, my phone beeped. A text form Myles. I didn’t want to open it. The reminder was enough.
“Is everything okay?”
I jumped at Calum’s question and nodded quickly. “Mhmm. Everything’s fine.”
Calum lifted off the deck chair and came to sit across me, leaning against the handrail.
Shielding my eyes from the sun, it was the perfect opportunity to ogle his body. Those faded old jeans were taut over his strong, muscular legs. The lawn shirt was snug across his chest and bulging biceps. Why did he have to be so damned irresistible? It wasn’t just his body that drove me mad with desire. It was the fact that he smiled so openly and generously. He lit up my day merely by existing. That’s what attracted me three years ago. Next to him, I was happy. I had no care in the world. Everything was going to be good.
And even now, as a fugitive, he still managed to radiate those same vibes.
My phone beeped again and I picked it up, purposely shoving it under the soft seat that lay over the deck chair. I didn’t want to deal with Myles. I didn’t want to be reminded anymore.
Four days ago, while I packed for this trip to Newport, I had every intention of exposing Calum and giving the FBI the information they needed. But now, especially after Zoe called Calum Daddy, all my plans had vanished into air. I was having doubts. I wanted to give my daughter her father, who obviously was head over heels crazy about her. I was no fool. I couldn’t deny that being around Calum remined me of how wonderful he was, how light and carefree he made me feel.
Irish Billionaire's Lost Daughter Page 5