by Malone, Cara
“Well,” Ivy said. “I guess I should go. I have to stop by my apartment to pick up the medical literature for that bariatric surgery today. Maybe I can read them between patient rounds.”
Suddenly, everything felt awkward. The moment they’d crawled out of bed, Ivy’s responsibilities had descended on her again and the judgmental piece of her brain asked her what she thought she was doing here.
Chloe must have seen it in her face because she walked over to Ivy and kissed her, then asked, “Was this a one-time thing?”
“I hope not,” Ivy said. It was an honest answer, even if it was a bit vague.
“I hope not, too,” Chloe said. “Do you want to meet me in the cafeteria after work? You can tell me all about that surgery.”
“Okay,” Ivy said. She gave Chloe another kiss and said, “Have a good day.”
“You too,” Chloe answered. Then she headed for the bathroom and Ivy let herself out.
It was lighter now and all of yesterday’s clouds were nowhere in sight. The sky was clear and the sun was just beginning to peek over the horizon, partially obscured by the buildings in the distance. The crisp air filled Ivy’s lungs and by the time she got down to the street she was practically skipping.
Maybe she shouldn’t have spent the night at Chloe’s, but she was damn glad she had. She picked up her pace and jogged all the way back to her apartment, getting her morning run in and making sure that she wouldn’t be late for her shift. Gradually, she realized that she had a huge, goofy grin on her face and she couldn’t stop thinking about how incredible the last twenty-four hours had been.
She wasn’t doing all the things she should do, but for the first time, she was ridiculously, stupidly happy with her life, and she’d never felt more like herself than when she woke up with Chloe in her arms.
Ivy decided, right then and there, that she could have it all.
16
Chloe
Chloe left her apartment about thirty minutes after Ivy, her feet heading for her shift at the hospital while her mind stayed on her futon with Ivy. She couldn’t say that it had been unexpected, but she had no idea that Ivy would actually set aside her studies long enough for anything more than a kiss, let alone spending the night. This morning had been even better.
It probably shouldn’t have surprised Chloe that Ivy had been a virgin – for as long as she’d known her, Ivy had never taken her nose out of a book for more than thirty minutes at a time. But Chloe had to admit she loved the idea of having something to teach Ivy for once.
She was happy that Ivy had agreed to meet her after work – Chloe hadn’t known whether to be optimistic or not about Ivy’s intentions, but it was a good sign. She hoped that Ivy was warming up to the idea of learning how to balance work and life – especially if it meant exploring the undeniable chemistry that had been growing between them since the beginning of the year.
Chloe was eager to see what this evening would have in store for them, but for now, she had to take a page from Ivy’s book and separate work from pleasure. She spent her walk to the hospital getting her head in the right place, mentally reviewing the cases for this morning’s rounds and burying all thoughts of her formerly emotionless study partner as soon as they popped up.
It was all so unlike her, Chloe thought despite her best efforts as she entered the hospital. It was hard to stop thinking about her because Chloe really liked this new version of Ivy. She’d liked the old Ivy, but this one made it hard to concentrate on anything else.
She’d have to try, though. Chloe pushed the thoughts away one more time and headed for the pediatrics department.
“You look tired,” Dr. Thomas said as Chloe joined the rest of the medical students for rounds. Chloe blushed, suddenly feeling transparent and wondering if everyone could see the reason for her tiredness written all over her face. But then Dr. Thomas said, “Don’t give too much of yourself to your patients or you’ll wear yourself out.”
The last time Chloe had been tired, it was because she’d been up all night with Tyler and his post-tonsillectomy soreness. Her reasons weren’t so noble today, but she couldn’t very well correct Dr. Thomas and tell her what she’d really been doing, so Chloe accepted the misplaced guidance and was grateful when Dr. Thomas waved everyone along behind her to check on patients.
Today there was another kid recovering from a tonsillectomy – one of the department’s most common complaints – and a little boy receiving burn treatment after he’d had an accident playing with firecrackers with his older brothers.
He’d gotten second-degree burns on his hand and forearm but he would make a full recovery with no loss of function and very little scarring. Chloe knew Dr. Thomas would want to spend a lot of time overseeing his treatment. She’d gone through something very similar as a kid – Chloe knew from the guest lecture she’d done at the university that Dr. Thomas had fallen into a campfire when she was young and sustained far more severe injuries than Jackson Cadena in room seven. As a result of her experience, she always went above and beyond to educate the family members of burn patients, teaching them how to change dressings and manage pain and making sure the kids understood just how serious their injuries could have been so that they’d be more cautious once they went home.
Chloe had only watched Dr. Thomas interact with one other burn patient so far during her rotation – a good thing because it was very hard to watch a child in the amount of pain that burns could bring. Chloe loved observing Dr. Thomas at work because she was so gentle and yet stern, and it was obvious where her passions lay. Chloe thought watching Dr. Thomas might give her some insight into her own career path and help her figure out which specialty she should choose.
Time was growing short for that.
Fortunately for Chloe, all the other medical students hated dealing with burn patients because the pain was so tricky to manage and they all scattered the minute Dr. Thomas released them from rounds. Chloe was the only one left standing beside her, so she said, “Looks like you’re with me today, Dr. Barnes. We need to teach Jackson’s parents how to change his dressings and if he’s tolerating the pain well enough, he’ll be able to go home tomorrow.”
They went back into room seven, where Jackson was playing games on a tablet with his uninjured hand and his dad was reading a newspaper in the chair by the window. They’d already been in the hospital for four days, but at least Jackson seemed to be in better spirits than he’d been the last time Chloe saw him.
“Where’s Mrs. Cadena?” Dr. Thomas asked.
“She’s at home, getting the other kids on the bus for school,” Jackson’s dad said. “She’ll be here in about an hour so I can go to work.”
“Sounds like you’re both wearing a little thin,” Dr. Thomas said sympathetically. “I do have good news for you, though. We may be able to transition to outpatient treatment soon. First we need to see how Jackson is healing.”
Chloe brought all the supplies to change Jackson’s bandages and her job was mostly to keep him distracted during the painful process while Dr. Thomas walked his dad through the steps. Chloe didn’t have to do much – Jackson just kept tapping away on his tablet and it seemed to be doing the trick to keep him occupied, although he did wince and flinch a few times. When it was over, Dr. Thomas pulled a rather generously-sized lollipop out of her coat pocket for him.
“You did great, kiddo,” she said. “You’ll be home, rough-housing with your brothers again in no time. No more firecrackers, okay?”
“Yeah,” Jackson said, revealing a missing incisor among the rest of his baby teeth as he smiled and stuck the lollipop in his mouth, the worst of the pain already forgotten.
* * *
At the end of her shift, Chloe went as fast as her feet would take her to the cafeteria. She’d been mostly successful at keeping Ivy off her mind during the day, but now that the moment had arrived, Chloe realized how much she’d been anticipating this moment. She hoped that they could pick up right where they’d left off this morning,
but she also worried whether Ivy would have had time during her surgery shift to reconsider her priorities.
Chloe quickly changed out of her scrubs and headed to the cafeteria. Ivy wasn’t there yet, but Chloe knew that her bariatric surgery was scheduled for the afternoon and there was a possibility it had run long. So she bought a slice of chocolate cake and two cups of coffee, grabbed a couple of plastic forks, and sat down to wait for Ivy.
Maybe this time, she’d ask Ivy who her favorite band was.
The cafeteria filled with employees and visitors as the dinner rush got under way, and Chloe’s stomach started rumbling as she looked at the moist, tempting cake in front of her. In the heat of the moment, she’d forgotten to eat breakfast and she didn’t have an appetite for lunch after she and Dr. Thomas trained both of Jackson’s parents to change his bandages.
She sipped her coffee to tide herself over, but by the time the dinner crowd started thinning out, Ivy still wasn’t there and Chloe was beginning to question herself. Maybe there had been a misunderstanding about their plans, or maybe Ivy really had chickened out.
Chloe was starting to feel sorry for herself, and disappointed that last night and this morning hadn’t meant as much to Ivy as it did to her. She gave in to her hunger and ate the cake, sure that she’d been stood up, and then chased it with some more coffee. She grimaced – it had gone cold while she was waiting.
“Did they let it burn again today?” a familiar voice asked. Chloe looked up to see Ivy sliding into the chair across from her. “Sorry I’m late. The bariatric case had complications.”
Chloe smiled, feeling silly for having doubted the connection they’d had this morning. She pushed the second coffee cup across the table, then pointed sheepishly at the empty plate and said, “I bought us some chocolate cake but I got hungry. I could go buy another slice.”
“Please no,” Ivy said with a laugh. “Have you ever seen a perforated bowel? Let’s just say I’m not in the mood for chocolate right now, or maybe ever again.”
Chloe laughed and wrinkled her nose, then asked, “Was the surgery cool despite the complications?”
“Oh yeah,” Ivy said, her eyes lighting up. In an instant, she was completely in her element. “It was incredible. Dr. Isaac let me inflate the gastric band. How was your day?”
She picked up her cup of coffee and sipped it, seeming oblivious to the temperature while Chloe told her all about Jackson and his parents, and his older brothers, who clearly needed a lesson or two in how to be decent babysitters. Then with a wave of jitters, Chloe asked, “So, do you want to get out of here?”
“Yeah, I do,” Ivy said, color coming into her cheeks. The way she was looking at Chloe, it was clear that she’d had just as much trouble concentrating today and it filled Chloe’s heart with happiness. “Where?”
“My place?” Chloe asked.
Ivy nodded, then asked, “Would you mind if I bring my notes?”
Chloe laughed – it was the most Ivy thing she could have said. Chloe answered with a wink, “You wouldn’t be Ivy Chan without them. I’m sure we can find some time to study this evening.”
* * *
The next two weeks flew by faster than the first three years of medical school had, but there were also moments that felt like time had stopped at exactly the right place.
Ivy, laying naked on the futon with a blanket draped over her lower half, reciting answers like a robot while Chloe quizzed her on medical licensing exam questions.
The pizza boxes and take-out containers stacking up on the floor, alongside piles and piles of Ivy’s neatly organized index cards and notebooks.
All the ways Ivy surprised Chloe, including her dedication to treating Chloe’s body like all the other things she was determined to be the best at. She was a quick study and it wasn’t long before Chloe was laughing at the idea that Ivy Chan ever had something to learn from her.
One night, after Ivy crawled up from between Chloe’s legs and confidently wiped the wetness from her chin, Chloe realized how fast it had all happened. They’d gone from study partners holding each other at arm’s length to lovers who barely left their bed except to go to work, and it had all happened in under a fortnight.
“Do you think that’s too fast?” Chloe had asked.
Ivy’s response had been a smirk and the comment, “Fast? I’ve been waiting years for you.”
One night when they were both on call at the hospital, they’d bravely climbed into the top bunk in the call room together because they’d rather risk getting caught than sleep without each other. As Ivy’s breathing began to steady and she fell asleep, Chloe had kissed her temple and said, “I’m going to miss you when you go home for Thanksgiving.”
“Come with me, then,” Ivy had murmured, her lips pressed against Chloe’s collar bone.
Chloe had smiled and snuggled closer to Ivy, assuming that the invitation wasn’t serious because it had been given when Ivy was so close to sleep. The next morning as they were getting dressed for their shifts, Chloe couldn’t help but bring it up again, though.
“Do you remember inviting me to Thanksgiving in your sleep?” she’d asked with a laugh.
“I wasn’t sleeping,” Ivy said. “I was serious. If you want to come, I’ll call my mother this afternoon and tell her to plan for one more at the table.”
“Really?” Chloe asked, taken aback.
“Of course,” Ivy said, pulling Chloe into a kiss. “I can’t stand the idea of being apart from you and my mother would be delighted to have another mouth to feed. It’s one of her greatest joys in life.”
“You’re ready for me to meet your parents?” Chloe asked, a smile playing over her lips.
At this, Ivy rolled her eyes. “I think the question is, are you ready to meet them? I’ll be honest – my family is not the warmest bunch, but if anyone can win them over, it’s you.”
“Are you out to them?” Chloe asked.
“I’m not really intentionally out to anyone other than you,” Ivy said, then she rolled her eyes and said, “Although Megan seems to have gotten some ideas of her own over the years so she probably knows. I wonder who told her.”
“Not me,” Chloe said, laughing to lighten the mood. Then she said, “So are you ready for that? Bringing your girlfriend home for Thanksgiving and coming out all in the same weekend?”
The look in Ivy’s eyes said it all – she looked spooked, like she’d gotten caught up in the moment and invited Chloe home before she’d thought all of that through. To be fair, she really had been half-asleep when she extended the invitation.
Chloe hurried to let her off the hook, offering, “We could just be study partners for the weekend.”
“You wouldn’t mind that?” Ivy asked, looking relieved already.
“We’ve only been seeing each other for a couple of weeks,” Chloe said, coming over to Ivy and wrapping her arms around her waist. “I have no intention of going anywhere, so we’ve got plenty of time for coming out when you’re ready.”
Ivy let out a visible sigh of relief and kissed Chloe. It became more passionate, their tongues coming together, and then Ivy pulled away and said, “You’re incredible.”
“You kiss your study partner like that?” Chloe asked, grinning. They finished getting dressed, and then just before they left the call room to begin their shifts, she asked, “How do you think they’ll take it when you do come out?”
Ivy shook her head and said, “I don’t know. Honestly, I wouldn’t be surprised if they’re angrier that I’m taking attention away from my education than at the fact that another woman is the recipient of that attention.”
“I think meeting your parents is going to be a singular experience,” Chloe said, giving Ivy one last kiss before they went their separate ways for the day.
* * *
One night when Ivy was on call and Chloe was at home, she’d been wandering aimlessly through the living room, looking at boxes and intending to unpack them but not actually settling on any one box t
o begin the job. When her phone rang and she saw Momma on the screen, Chloe felt a quick stab of guilt. How long had it been since their last conversation? Chloe had been so absorbed in the whirlwind of Ivy that she’d forgotten about almost everything else.
“Hi, Momma,” Chloe said apologetically as she answered, sitting down on the futon. “How are you?”
“I’m good,” her mom said. “I thought maybe you died, though.”
“I’m sorry,” Chloe said. “I moved into that new apartment and-”
She was about to say and I fell hard for my study partner, but her mom cut her off with an apology of her own.
“It’s okay,” she said. “I understand you’re busy and it was probably unrealistic to think we could talk as often as we did all this time. You’re growing up and you need space to do that. Heck, sweetheart, you’re almost a doctor!”
“Not really,” Chloe said. “I’ve still got more than six months before graduation, and then I have to do a residency.”
“Any luck with that, by the way?” her mom asked. She always did her best not to nag, but she worried about the things that worried her daughter. Chloe had been able to forget about the residency dilemma for the last couple of weeks thanks to Ivy, but it took her mom all of ten seconds to bring up her deepest fear. That was a special talent that moms seemed to possess, and Chloe wondered if Ivy’s mom did it, too. She’d know soon enough.
“I think I might just go with pediatrics after all,” Chloe said.
“I knew it!” her mom said as if she’d just won a bet. “I’ve been telling your dad for years that’s where you’d end up. I think you’ll be a perfect fit.”