by Cat Johnson
“Jump as high as you can to start. That way you have less climbing to do,” Rick called to him.
The kid was getting tired. He climbed a lot more slowly than he had the rope wall, but managed to get up, swing across to the second rope and climb down again without falling.
Meanwhile the group watching them was growing. Rick did his best to ignore the on-lookers. At least they hadn’t all been here for his less than optimal run.
He couldn’t be concerned with that now because Jamey had reached the Dirty Name.
It was set up like the uneven bars in gymnastics, but since these were logs, not bars, they were impossible to grab with just your hands.
“Just jump and hook one arm and one leg over the high log,” Rick said.
Jamey shot him a look. “Are you nuts?”
Rick laughed. “No. I did it.”
“Yeah, you did. It looked easier when you were up here.”
“Just give it a try. You have three attempts before you have to move on.”
Jamey drew in a breath and finally nodded, leaping at the high horizontal log and catching it with both hands before he slipped off.
“That’s one.”
Grumbling, Jamey went back to the first log, jumped up onto it and eyed the high log. He leapt at it, this time getting one arm and almost getting his torso over before he slipped off.
“That’s two,” Rick said, knowing he was being annoying and enjoying it as Jamey got more frustrated.
Jamey’s grumbled obscenities had Rick chuckling. This obstacle was called the Dirty Name for a reason.
Finally, he leapt and did what Rick said. He managed to hook one leg and arm over the log before he wiggled his whole body over and dropped to the ground.
“Good. That only cost you like four minutes.”
Stumbling across the sand, Jamey scowled again, but after the challenge of the Dirty Name, the rest of the course didn’t present as many difficulties.
The rest of his run was slow and messy.
After a faulty start on the Weaver where he had to figure out how to make it over and under while still holding on, Jamey made it through the metal bars.
He climbed up and made it across the rope Burma Bridge and finally figured out his hand and foot holds on the Traverse Wall. He shimmied across the low rope upside down. Managed another balance walk without falling off the logs and did the Monkey Bars fairly quickly, if a little sloppy.
By the vaults, Jamey was throwing his body over the logs and stumbled to the finish.
Rick yelled, “Time!” He glanced at Jeannie. “How long?”
She cringed. “Nineteen minutes and thirty-two seconds.”
“What?” His whole body heaving as he tried to catch his breath, Jamey managed to get the single word out.
Rick shook his head. “Dude, that’s really not bad.”
Jamey screwed up his mouth. “It’s not good.”
Rick laughed. “It was your first time. Give yourself a break. There are some guys who wouldn’t even be able to finish.”
“Really?” Jamey asked.
“Yes, really. There’s a rumor—I don’t know if it’s true or not—that Lance Armstrong, the bike dude, got stuck on top of the cargo net. Froze from fear and they had to get him down.”
“For real? Wow.” That seemed to appease Jamey.
“You did good. A little practice and you’d have no problem.”
“You’re not just saying that?” Jamey asked Rick.
“I promise.” Rick turned and almost ran into the cameraman, still right there in his face. They’d run the course, so what was the camera guy waiting for?
“We done here?” Rick asked him, knowing he probably shouldn’t be talking directly to the camera.
“I don’t know. You doing anything else?” the camera guy asked.
Rick lifted a brow. “We only have permission to film the O-course, so I’d say that’s a no to doing anything else.”
“All righty.” Finally, the cameraman flipped a switch and the red light blinked off.
Relieved, Rick turned back to Jamey. “Drink some water so you don’t dehydrate. And clean out those cuts on your hands and arms.”
Jamey glanced down as if noticing for the first time the red raw streaks on his skin before looking back up at Rick. “You’re a real good coach. You should teach here or something.”
Sierra had made her way across the sand to them. She handed Rick his cell and glasses and said, “He’s right. Did you ever think about teaching the new guys?”
“Be an instructor?” Rick laughed. “Yeah, no. My active duty days are over. My old commander, Grant Milton, actually did that for a little while—became a Green Team instructor. He didn’t love it. He missed the action and ended up going back to the team after a year.”
There was that look again. Sierra’s gaze seemed to penetrate deep into him, evaluating his words and the truth behind them.
He’d gladly stare into those eyes of hers for hours—particularly while they were in bed—but this felt different.
Something was definitely up with her. He reached out and pulled her close, pressing a kiss to her forehead.
“Ready to head out?” he asked, deciding what he needed was some time alone with her to get over this weirdness.
“Yeah, sure.” She nodded.
“Good. Let’s go.”
She had something on her mind and as soon as they wrapped up this damn promotional shit for this film, he intended to get to the bottom of it and find and what.
CHAPTER 16
They were back at the hotel, but Sierra couldn’t get the obstacle course at Coronado off her mind.
It had been eye opening, watching Rick run that course.
He was smooth and fast and strong. So comfortable, like it was second nature to him to be hanging from nets thirty feet in the air, or running across rope bridges.
Sierra supposed it was second nature to him. It had been how he’d lived for more than half of his adult life.
Now his life was completely different . . . and she wasn’t sure how he felt about it. Or how she felt about it either.
He had been in his element during the shoot on the beach. From when he’d planned that scene with his old teammates. To when he’d organized the SEALs they’d brought in as extras for the scene. He loved every minute of it. She could see that.
Whether he was joking one minute or completely serious the next, he was right where he was supposed to be—in the middle of the action.
His demeanor during that shoot, and again at the base today, was the opposite of the stone-faced, tight-jawed version of the man who was her head of security. The man she’d become used to these past couple of years.
It was obvious. He needed the action. Needed to lead a team.
He hadn’t been doing that for the past few years and that was because of her. She’d plucked him right out of the environment where he’d belonged—working with his teammates for a company that sent men like Rick around the globe to protect the world from everything bad.
She’d separated him from the friends he loved and from his life’s purpose and stuck him in the role of her bodyguard.
No wonder he was so sullen. He was bored. Here he worked alone. There was no challenge. No purpose.
Rick had gone from literally saving the world to standing around for eighteen hours a day on the off chance someone got too close to her.
He’d gone from going full out, giving one hundred and ten percent at all times, living on adrenaline, to now throttling all that energy inside him.
She’d seen the results of that. He’d lost his cool and had broken Jamey’s cheekbone with one punch.
Rick stayed with her and did a job he was overqualified for and bored with because he loved her.
He did it because just once in her acting career a psycho had become a threat and nearly did her harm. Rick had saved her back then and he was determined to save her now.
Rick had put himself in charge of makin
g sure it never happened again . . . and it was making his life miserable.
It was clear what she had to do. She had to put his well being above her own. She had to do the hardest thing she’d ever had to do, for his sake.
She needed to let him go.
“Hey.” At the sound of his voice, Sierra glanced up to see Rick watching her. “You okay?”
“Uh.” She swallowed. “Yeah.”
He frowned. “You sure?”
“Yeah. Fine.” As fine as she could be. “So, it was nice seeing Jon and Zane, wasn’t it?”
He frowned but nodded. “Yeah. It was.”
“Maybe you should take a trip to Virginia for a little while now that the filming is done,” she suggested.
“Yeah. That would be cool. How much time do we have before you start the next film?”
“A few months.”
He nodded. “Okay, so after the press tour for this movie, let’s plan on spending some time in Virginia.”
“Or you could go now,” she said.
Rick frowned. “But you’re flying to New York to start the talk show circuit next week.”
She lifted one shoulder, trying to look more casual than she felt. “Yeah, but I don’t really need you there for that.”
He looked at her as if she were crazy. “What do you mean? Why not?”
“I’ll be with Jamey. I don’t think anyone will bother me.”
Rick drew back, his sandy brows drawn low over his eyes. “What’s going on?”
“What do you mean? Nothing’s going on. I just thought you might want to take some jobs with Jon and Zane’s company, since you enjoy that work so much.” It took all of her acting skills to play dumb.
If she could just get him to go back to his old life, he’d realize how much he missed it. Then maybe he’d make the choice to leave on his own.
Eyes on her, he said, “I enjoy being with you.”
“Yeah, but you’re really good at all the military stuff. Don’t you want to put all that skill to good use?”
“I do put it to good use. By protecting you.” His words were slow and measured.
“But you really seem like you’re wasting your training just being a bodyguard.”
“Carey, what’s really going on here?” he asked.
Uh oh. He’d used her real name. Things always felt a hundred times more serious—more real—when he did that.
She drew in a breath and let it out. “I think you shouldn’t be in charge of my security anymore.”
“Why not?” The tone of his voice rose with surprise.
“Because you need to go back to your old life.”
Rick shook his head, obviously confused as he asked, “Why?”
“Because you were better there doing what you used to do than you are here.”
He narrowed his eyes. “Is this because of what I did to Jamey?”
She bobbed her head. “Partially.”
“I fixed that. It was a mistake. I apologized. I made it right. Howard and the studio are fine with how it turned out. Happy even.”
“I’m not.” She wasn’t happy because the man she’d met in Virginia would never have punched a guy for no good reason. Would never have mistrusted her and believed she’d cheat on him.
That man had been confident and bold, but measured and calm. This man before her now was nothing like that.
Rick had changed. Being with her had changed him. It was time for her to make things right.
“Why are you doing this? Wait.” His eyes widened. “Is it because I was in the movie? If that’s it, I promise you I don’t want to be in front of the camera ever again. I’m perfectly happy to let you be the one in the spotlight. You’re the star. I just want to be there and keep you safe.”
“It’s not that. I know you’re not interested in being on screen and even if you were, I wouldn’t care. Jesus, Rick, my ego isn’t that big.”
He spread his hands wide, obviously at a loss. “Then what is it?”
“It’s you. I’ve never seen you so happy as when you were in those dirty trenches, dressed in camo, running alongside those SEALs with a gun in your hand.”
He lifted a shoulder. “Yeah, it was fun for a couple of nights running ops with the teams without anyone shooting at us for real.”
She shook her head. “You wouldn’t have cared even if they were shooting real bullets instead of blanks.”
He opened his mouth to speak and she cut him off.
“You’re miserable on set, Rick. I can see it. I don’t want to be the person who puts that expression on your face.”
“You’re not. I’m happy just being with you.”
“Happy men don’t suspect their girlfriends of cheating on them and they don’t beat the shit out of innocent men over it.”
Looking up at the ceiling, Rick let out a huff before focusing back on her. “I did everything I could do to make up for that.”
“I know. It’s not enough.” She was being tough. It was the only way with him. She knew that.
“Fine. I’ll arrange for someone else to take over your security.”
“And go back to working for Jon and Zane?” she asked.
He sighed. “Yeah. I’ll see what jobs they have out here in California. Or wherever your next movie shoot is going to be.”
She shook her head. “No.”
“What do you mean no?” He eyed her.
“You know the hours I work. We’ll rarely see each other and when we’re not together you’ll be suspicious, wondering what I’m doing. Whom I’m with.”
“One time! I know I was crazy suspecting you and Jamey. I know I was wrong. I apologized. I learned from my mistake.”
“You can’t change who you are at the core. I saw your face as you watched us together. You hated every minute I was with Jamey.”
“It’s your job. I understand that. I can handle it.”
“No, you can’t. You almost killed a major motion picture because you can’t.”
“I can—”
“No. Rick, you need a woman who’s all yours. Not one who gets paid to be with other men. And that’s fine. You should have that. But it can’t be me.”
Rick continued to frown, slowly shaking his head. “I don’t want to break up over this.”
“I don’t see any other way.” It tore her heart out to say it, but it was true.
If they stayed together, he’d end up ruining her career. She hated to admit it but this decision was as much for her sake as for his.
Things hadn’t felt the same since that morning in Howard’s office. Maybe she never did completely forgive Rick for suspecting her and Jamey. For punching him and putting the film in jeopardy.
Hell, maybe they just needed a break from each other to figure things out. She didn’t know. All she knew was that as long as he stayed, things would remain the same. And the way things were wasn’t working any longer. Something had to change.
“It’s gotta be this way, Rick. I think a complete break will be easier for both of us.”
“No. Carey . . .”
Tears pricked behind her eyes. She couldn’t let him talk. If he did, he might say something to make her change her mind. “I’ll book you a flight to Virginia for tomorrow morning. I’ll get another room for myself for tonight.”
Before he could try to stop her, she grabbed her purse and reached for the doorknob.
As she left she caught one last glimpse of Rick standing alone in the living room of suite.
The sight of his distraught expression and slumped shoulders was enough to break her heart, but it wasn’t enough to make her stay.
CHAPTER 17
It had been too long since Rick had been home.
Six months, at least. Yet he noticed he still thought of this place—his sister’s house where he only had a room to sleep in when he needed it—as home.
That probably should have told him something. Been a big old honking clue that something was wrong.
Looking back it sur
e was.
It said that the more than two years he’d spent with Sierra, traveling the world amid glitz and glamour, had been more of a fantasy than reality.
They’d never put down roots. Sure, she owned a place in Miami, but that was hers and they were rarely there anyway.
But he wasn’t even concerned about the property ownership. Whose name was on the deed didn’t matter. He wasn’t that kind of guy who couldn’t handle it when a woman earned more than he did.
How could he be? He’d gone into the military knowing what the salaries were. And the tabloids were very good at letting the world know what Sierra earned per movie and there was no way he could ever equal that stratospheric amount no matter how hard he worked.
The problem wasn’t real estate or bank accounts. It was that they’d never created a home that was theirs together. A home base formed jointly from the two of them. Their combined hearts and souls. Interests and likes.
Perhaps that was a good thing. If they had, he’d be losing his home as well as his girlfriend.
Head hanging as heavily as his heart, Rick reached out and rang the doorbell.
He had his key, but this was Darci and Chris’s place now.
Rick didn’t feel right barging in on the married couple that was purportedly trying to conceive a baby. He didn’t need to walk in on that scene. He had enough weighing on him as it was.
The front door swung wide and the looming figure that was his old teammate and new brother-in-law filled the opening.
“Well, I’ll be damned. Come on in.” Chris’s southern hospitality welcomed Rick into what had been his own home. As Chris closed the door with them both inside, he said, “I didn’t know you were fixin’ to visit.”
Unfortunately, this wasn’t a visit. Rick should probably tell him that. “Um—”
“Rick. Did I miss a text from you that you were coming?” Darci asked from the kitchen. Her gaze cut to Chris. “I told you that cheap cell phone service you switched us to was no good.”
Rick held up his hand before his presence created marital discord. “No. I didn’t text. I’m sure your cell phone is just fine.”