by Katie Cross
“It isn’t often a student is able to get a trick by me. Congratulations.”
I knew, without asking, that she referred not only to the cat but to the mimicking spell of Miss Celia’s voice. There was nothing about this moment to celebrate, but everything to fear. I held my breath, waiting for her to pass judgment, to decide my punishment or fate.
“Go to bed, Bianca.”
Miss Mabel watched me gather my scrolls and slip past her to my bedroom. She didn’t move but stayed like a pillar, staring at the fire in the doorway when I shut my bedroom door. I leaned against the wall and let out a breath. The real cat gave a pathetic call when he saw me, then turned around and settled back to sleep.
I sat on the side of the bed to calm my racing heart. I didn’t understand what just happened, but knew I hadn’t done myself any favors.
The air was almost warm at three the next afternoon when we congregated outside for the Letum Wood Geography class with Miss Bernadette. Our breath left small puffs of trailing air behind. The chill pinched at the cheeks of the girls until they were a ruddy color, but didn’t feel vicious.
A small queue of first-years stood in a loose huddle near the old oak tree. When Miss Bernadette arrived, her cheeks were a lovely pink color that contrasted her brown, fur-lined cloak.
“Letum Wood extends throughout most of the eastern side of the Central Network,” Miss Bernadette began. “It fills up the North, reaches to the Borderlands, and spills over into the Eastern Network. Follow me, and we’ll look at a few things that grow here.”
Camille, Leda, and I fell into step with each other.
“I gave the cat poke root this morning,” I said, breaking into the conversation first. Camille bit her nails with an intensity that could only mean she had a test coming up, and Leda stood several paces away from us, brooding, her lips and face puckered into an annoyed scowl. Their minimal response disheartened my already frustrated mood. I wanted to tell them about my encounter with Grandmother but decided against it. For some reason, I didn’t want to share her.
“Oh?” Camille said, distant. “That’s nice.”
“I also had to amputate his leg. The surgery caused only a few bloodstains on my sheets. Miss Mabel even helped. She removed my curse.”
I monitored their responses, but neither of them said another word. They just continued to trudge forward in their own worlds. I let out a sigh and looked at the moving body of cloaked sheep in front of us, following Miss Bernadette with loyal devotion. When nothing changed for the next fifteen minutes, except for Miss Bernadette’s quiet drawl on the types of oak trees spread throughout the wood, I poked Camille in the ribs with my elbow.
“What’s going on? You’ve chewed half your fingers off.”
“Oh, Bianca!” she wailed, as if she’d just been waiting for me to ask. “I have a test today in Algebra and Geometry, and I just know I’m going to fail!”
I held up a hand to quiet her and looked to the front of the group to make sure no one else had heard the outburst. Of all the teachers, Miss Bernadette was the one I didn’t want to upset. If she caught us not paying attention, I’d feel horrible.
“I’m sure you’ll be fine, Camille,” I whispered, turning back to her.
“I hate math, Bianca. Really! I just can’t do it.”
“Have you asked Leda for help?”
“Yes, but she won’t look into the future for me on this one. She’ll normally look ahead and tell me if my chances are good or not so I don’t get so much anxiety. It’s the not knowing that stresses me out!” Camille folded her arms and shot Leda a scathing glance. “She’s been concentrating on something all morning and won’t tell me what, but it’s put her in a foul mood.”
I looked to Leda, but she was no help, caught up in her thoughts and staring at a tree trunk with a blank expression on her face. Once she seemed to come halfway out of it, I nudged her too.
“What’s got you?”
She turned to me with an impatient growl, but quickly stopped. Her different-colored eyes were bloodshot.
“Nothing,” she said, obviously still vexed. She hesitated, opened her mouth to say something, then turned away in a huff and fell into another daze.
“See?” Camille said with a self-righteous sniff that would have made the snooty third-years proud. “She gets like this sometimes, trying so hard to make sense of something. Then she gets frustrated if she can’t, which makes the curse even harder to control.”
I studied Leda’s hunched shoulders and clenched fists.
“Sounds like an awful cycle,” I muttered with little sympathy, their bad moods making mine worse.
“Right,” Camille snorted. “But not as bad as failing Algebra and having to take it again.”
She fell to studying a small piece of parchment hidden in her palm, her lips moving in silent recitation as she read. Miss Bernadette called us forward, and the whole group moved as one, deeper into the forest.
I watched Leda with a suddenly wary eye as she stumbled along. What was she seeing, and why was it so important? When Leda didn’t look my way again, I turned my back on her, ignoring her vexed expressions. The three of us spread out for the rest of the lesson, and the class faded by without me any wiser for it.
35
Vertigo
Miss Mabel waited for me in the classroom when I returned from breakfast later that week, a warm bowl of oatmeal sitting in my stomach. She gazed out the windows on the backyard, her arms folded across her chest. She spoke without looking at me as I entered the room.
“Are you ready for class today, Bianca?”
“Yes, Miss Mabel.”
“Good.”
A feeling like a punch to my midsection slammed into me. I tumbled to my knees and gasped. My vision swam for a few seconds; my scalp began to tingle moments before I blacked out. When I came to, Miss Mabel stood over me, her long blonde hair dangling around her face.
“Goodness! You certainly fell harder than I thought you would. Does your head hurt?”
Disoriented, I blinked several times. My right shoulder throbbed and the world still spun. My head pulsed with dull thuds.
“What h-happened?”
Using my left elbow to prop myself up, I pushed off the floor. Dizziness overwhelmed me. My vision failed, my fingers prickled, and I passed out again.
The sound of Miss Mabel chuckling brought me back around.
“Oh, I wouldn’t do that,” she stopped me from trying to sit up by putting a foot on my shoulder. It took a moment for my vision to clear enough to bring the shiny black boot into focus. “It’ll make it worse.”
My head fell back to the floor, where it hit with a bang and echoed through my skull. I groaned and closed my eyes as Miss Mabel lifted her foot.
“What you have just been hit with is a vertigo curse. Eventually, with time, the fits of vertigo will decrease to once an hour. Then, after a few days, they will only come once every two hours, and so forth. You get the idea. Eventually, you’d live with blacking out every four to five hours. Not intolerable, I think.”
Her footsteps reverberated through my ears as she walked around me.
“As you know, I don’t think education is very valuable unless it’s hands-on. Especially for the Advanced Curses and Hexes mark. Wouldn’t you agree? No one should be able to cast a curse if she doesn’t know how it feels. This is an education you can’t get anywhere else in the Network, Bianca. Trust me. Lucky for you, isn’t it? I’m also doing it like this because your papers and homework make me cringe.”
Then, as quickly as it came, the pain and dizziness faded. I opened my eyes, and Miss Mabel smiled.
“You may sit up now.”
She walked to her desk as I pulled myself together and stood up. My head didn’t dive up and down in a dizzy spell. It felt normal and clear. Once removed, there were no residual effects.
Before I had gotten very far, the punch came again, only stronger this time. I held onto my desk to keep from falling and gasped fo
r air. Nothing happened. I swallowed back a tickle in my throat as I waited. But the sensation didn’t go away. It grew into a scratch. Uncomfortable, I cleared my throat. My mouth felt like sand. The need to drink seized me.
Suddenly I was so thirsty, I would die.
Barely aware of my actions, I grabbed a glass of water Miss Mabel had set out and began to drink. It tasted so sweet. The heat abated when the moisture slid past my throat. But as soon as I emptied the glass, my baked mouth returned. No, it had never left. The water didn’t quench my thirst. I still craved more. Miss Mabel sat down in her chair and lounged back with a teasing smile.
“Thirsty, Bianca?”
Trying to hide my desperation was useless. I couldn’t fight a curse, as I already knew. What is it about cursing me that she likes? Instead, I clung to the desk and forced myself not to move. If I got near water, I would drink until I vomited, and then begin again.
“That feeling you’re experiencing precedes every curse. Sometimes it’s the only way you know you’ve been hit. I’ve seen some curses so strong that the initial wave knocks the person over. Isn’t that wild?”
I was barely able to concentrate. All I could think of was cool blue water. The refreshing taste sliding down my mouth, past my scorched tongue, into my stomach. Moments before I gave in and broke away from my desk to search for something to drink, the feeling stopped. Relieved, I put my head in my hands and collected my breath.
“There are some curses you can cast that are silent, without precursor, meaning that there is no way of knowing when they hit you. They are a bit more advanced and complicated. Of course, we won’t bother with those. Not today, anyway.”
She sat up and strolled into the middle of the room. As soon as her footsteps paused, I straightened up.
“Ready for some more?” she asked.
Her high eyebrow and tilted head challenged me. She wanted me to say no, to quit. Both of us knew this lesson would go on for hours. I wondered if this was her way of getting retribution for the deception-spell cat and tricking her with Miss Celia’s voice.
Or if this was just a part of her evil plan that I couldn’t decipher. Either way, I couldn’t turn back. The awful arithmetic of saving my own life and shucking off the Inheritance curse meant I had to stay, and succeed, at all costs.
“Yes, Miss Mabel,” I said, not without some trepidation, my fists clenched at my side. “I’m ready.”
Three hours.
Three grueling hours.
It took that long for Miss Celia to ring the little tinkling bell for lunch. Miss Mabel had just started explaining how to cast a swollen tongue curse when the bell interrupted and she looked up in surprise.
“Oh, is it already lunch?” she asked in feigned shock. “Fabulous. I’m exhausted.”
Maybe she’ll choke on her lunch and I won’t have to see her again.
I wanted to cast my own curse. One that would make the floorboards disappear beneath her and swallow her into an unforgiving chasm of black snakes. Instead I rested my forehead on the desk and waited for the spasms in my arms and legs to stop. Blasted seizure curse. They slowly subsided, leaving me weary and still.
I hadn’t known there were that many curses in our whole world, ranging from continuous sneezing to the inability to swallow. The most frightening had been a suffocation curse. While I knew she wouldn’t let me die, not yet, the constant sensation that I couldn’t breathe terrified me into wanting to.
The most unsettling part was Miss Mabel’s amusement as she controlled me like a puppet.
“Don’t bother going downstairs to eat,” she said. “I’ll have Miss Celia bring you something. You have a class with Miss Amelia tomorrow afternoon on counter-curses that should serve as a good introduction. You also have a paper due tonight. I want a one thousand word essay on the differences between counter-curses and removing curses. Then, I want you to read chapters ten through fifteen from the textbook Curses. I’ll see you tomorrow. If you have any questions, I’ll be in my office.”
So much for tuning down the homework that I’m so horribly bad at.
The moment she disappeared, I folded my arms, lowered my head, and tried not to think about how much I hated her. I wouldn’t remember those instructions and would have to ask her to repeat them later, but I didn’t care. Miss Celia came up after a sweet twenty minutes in which I hovered on the bridge between wakefulness and sleep, startling me into reality again. She carried a plate loaded with food.
“Bianca?” she cried, aghast. “Blessed be, are you all right?”
“Yes, Miss Celia.” My voice echoed in the small cave my arms made.
“What happened?”
“Nothing.” I straightened up to put her at ease. “I’m just tired today.”
“Tired!” she exclaimed. “You look nearly worn to death! Are you getting enough sleep?”
“I’m okay,” I managed. “Nothing a little lunch won’t help.”
She eyed me in disbelief and set the plate down. Sliced apples rested in a petaled design around a sandwich. The bread smelled buttery and felt warm. My stomach grumbled, but I wasn’t sure I’d have the energy to chew. My midsection felt sore from all the precursors.
“It’s nothing fancy today, I’m afraid. Just a sandwich and some fruit.”
“That sounds great. Thank you, Miss Celia.”
She hesitated. She didn’t seem to want to leave but had no reason to linger.
“Are you sure you’re all right?”
“Yes, I’m well.”
“Okay,” she sighed. “Then I’ll leave you alone. Just let me know if I can do anything, all right?”
I nodded. She turned away to leave, then circled back with a little exclamation.
“Oh! I just remembered something. Brianna’s birthday party is coming up soon. Her parents have asked us to have a little celebration for her seventeenth. Do you think you’ll be able to come?”
“Maybe.”
Living through the day would be a requirement, and I didn’t feel up to it right then.
“We’ll have yellow cake with red frosting,” she added, as if that would entice me into a commitment. The thought of getting as far away from Miss Mabel as possible appealed to me more than the promise of sweets.
“I’ll try, Miss Celia.”
She gave me an awkward little pat on my shoulder. Tears welled up in my eyes, and I wondered how long I’d be able to endure.
“Get some rest, poor dear.”
Miss Celia mumbled something under her breath as she puttered to the spiral stairs and left me in the quiet classroom. After staring at the sandwich for a long time, I pushed it away, dropped my head back onto my arms, and fell asleep.
36
Purple Flowers
“Bianca, try this: instead of saying the spell, I want you to focus on what you want to happen. Focus really, really hard. Can you do that?”
His dark eyes smiled at me.
“Yes, Papa. But I can’t–”
“Just try it, B. That’s all I ask. Think really hard about what you want, not what spell to use. That’s how silent magic is different.”
“It’s hard!”
“I know. But you can do hard things. If we learn it now, it will help you be strong when you’re older.”
Sunbeams strayed through the trees, warming my skin. The air smelled like fresh dirt and leaves. We were in a wild, unknown part of the forest where no one would see us. The high sun in the sky meant we still had a few hours before Papa had to leave.
The last thing I saw before I closed my eyes was the delicate curve of the yellow petals.
“Okay,” I whispered, uncertain. Then I turned all my thoughts to the yellow flower, trying as hard as I could to imagine it purple instead. Time passed, but I kept my eyes closed until the sounds of Letum Wood faded and all I thought of was a purple flower. When I heard a cry of delight, I opened my eyes to see a violet blossom in hand. The only signs of the original flower remained in the few streaks of yellow down
the center of each petal.
“Mama! Papa!” I shrieked, waving it in the air. “I did it! Look, it’s purple!”
“You did it!” Mama cried.
Papa gathered me in his arms and spun around. “I knew you could!” he said, exultant with pride. “If anyone could do it, you can, sweet B.” The world blurred into green and brown streaks as we twirled, laughing. He set me down and then settled onto a rock near Mama, who rubbed a hand across his back.
“You aren’t going to leave yet, are you?” I asked him, fiddling with the flower stem, wondering if I could find some others and make a crown.
“No, of course not. We still have a few hours left. See, look up at the sun. It’s not on the horizon yet, is it?”
“No.”
“Then we still have time! What if we play your favorite game?”
“Why can’t we go to your house?” I asked. “We never go to your house, Papa. We always meet here.”
The two of them exchanged a look that meant I wasn’t supposed to know something. So many secrets. He pulled me in closer to him, then propped me up on his lap.
“We meet here in the forest because I have a very busy job. Sometimes it’s dangerous. I don’t want you to get hurt.”
His gentle tone did little to soothe my sadness. Mama ran a hand down my face and gave me the smile that meant everything would be okay. Papa took her other hand.
“Mama said no one can know you’re my Papa.”
“For now, she’s right,” he said. “Maybe one day, when you’re older, we can tell people. But for now we’re going to keep it a secret, okay?”
I still didn’t understand, but I knew that understanding it wouldn’t change anything.
“Who is going to protect you, Papa?”
He smiled and softly chucked my chin with his knuckles. “I can take care of myself, Bianca. That’s part of the reason I’m teaching you all these difficult things. Then one day you can protect yourself.”
“Because I’m cursed?”