by Reed, Zoe
“Don’t think about it. She wants to see you.” Luna hurriedly pushed me out the bedroom door, almost plowing down Kyla, who had been about to knock.
“Oh shit, it’s Kyla,” Luna chuckled, clearly amused at the timing, and walked away smugly. “See ya.”
“Hi, I was just about to come see you.” I stuttered, backing into my room, closely followed by Kyla. I stood next to the bed, watching her pace back and forth near the now closed door. “Look Kyla, I want you to–”
“No, uh,” she cut me off, waving a hand in the air as if to ward off the sound of my voice. “Can you sit?” Kyla pointed to the bed, and after I had sat at the edge of it she continued to pace.
I didn’t know what to do so I sat there, waiting for her to work up the nerve or figure out whatever she wanted to say. But every second that went by without her saying anything the nerves in my stomach grew. I had no idea what was coming, and as what seemed like hours ticked by I started to fear the worst.
Finally Kyla stopped pacing, and even though she turned to face me, her eyes never left the floor. “Okay, first off, I want to say sorry. I said that you were being confusing and I couldn’t figure out your feelings, but I was stupid. You were just being respectful. I freaked out because I didn’t want to be the kind of person who cheats, regardless of what I feel, and you knew that. So thanks. For not pushing me too hard.” Realizing that Kyla was no longer upset I let my nerves settle slightly.
She took a deep breath before continuing. “And second, everything about my life has changed in the past month. New town and new school. Werewolves. New feelings. Everything changed so fast I didn’t know how to handle it. Allowing Aaron to come was stupid. It was my last attempt to try and keep things the same. To stop everything from changing so quickly.” As Kyla spoke she moved closer to me, and finally reaching where I sat, she put her knees on the bed on either side of me and leaned back in my lap. “But I realized that I need change.” She gently cupped my face in her hands and leaned her forehead against mine. “I need it desperately.”
Finally, Kyla lowered her lips to mine in a soft, delicate kiss, and even though I expected it, there was no way I could have prepared myself for the power of it. It was like a burst of electricity exploded in my chest, bringing back tenfold all those excited feelings I’d ever felt. She slid her hand from my cheek to behind my head, pulling me into a deeper kiss as she gently entangled her fingers in my hair. Each of the tiniest movements of her lips against mine made my stomach whirl and my head swim. Fiery warmth radiated throughout my entire body, spreading an absolute bliss that weighed down every muscle and clouded my every thought.
Moments later, Kyla lazily pulled away and sighed a deep, unfamiliar sigh. Worried it hadn’t been everything she had expected, I looked her concernedly in the eyes. “What’s wrong?”
She dropped her hands limply at her sides, and gave a reassuring smile and a shake of the head to instantly put my mind at ease. “Nothing’s wrong. I just can’t believe I let myself miss out on that for so long.”
I grinned as I wrapped my arms tightly around her, pulling her down on the bed and rolling us over so I was on top of her. She let out a playful shriek before she flung her arms around my neck and pulled me into another kiss. Every second our lips touched the fiery warmth spread, igniting an insuppressible passion in me that burned at my very core. As I slid a single arm under Kyla’s delicate waist and pulled her closer, I could feel myself losing control.
Each deepening kiss wasn’t deep enough. The intensity wasn’t intense enough. Closer wasn’t close enough. I took a deep breath, trying to force the heat away, but I was too close to the edge. In one swift motion I threw myself off Kyla and the bed and warily started to pace at the foot of it.
Kyla sat up, confusion and worry illuminated in her eyes. I smiled apologetically. “I’m sorry. Too much excitement too fast.” The confusion didn’t disperse, so I lay across the bed before her, folding my hands behind my head and continuing to breathe deep and slow. “I almost Changed.”
With a nod of understanding Kyla crossed her legs underneath her and leaned forward, taking care not to get too close so she wouldn’t set me off again. “A little too much pent up tension, huh?” she teased with a grin and a playful wink, and I was glad I wasn’t the only one who’d felt tortured by it. Growing serious, she looked down at the bed and began to pick at a stray thread on the blanket. “How can you stop it?”
“I guess taking things a lot slower, or the opposite.” I watched Kyla look up and then uneasily back down as she registered what the opposite was, and not wanting her to think it was expected, I added, “And I didn’t want to assume that it wouldn’t be too fast.”
“You’re right not to assume,” Kyla said shyly, and then worried that she’d offended me fumblingly added, “I mean I want you. It. Um…”
The blood rushing to her cheeks caused me to laugh heartily, supplying a release of tension that made it possible for me to regain full control of myself. “Kyla, it’s okay. I know what you mean. It’s sort of new to me too, you know.”
Gradually and reluctantly as she sat there, silently watching me, the red faded from her face. The gorgeous brunette was clearly in deep thought, and as she apprehensively leaned her face closer to mine, I understood what she was thinking. It was a kiss that she wanted, but she wasn’t sure if I was calmed enough to help herself to one. Not wanting to miss out, I pushed myself up to meet her lips halfway. There was nothing in my entire life I could compare to the tenderness, the taste, and the splendor of Kyla’s lips. It felt as though God himself had created them for my indulgence. As I pulled away and met those sparkling green eyes with my own, I knew there could be no other explanation.
Kyla directed her body horizontally so that she was parallel with me on the bed, and after scooting as close as possible until she was nearly on top of me she propped her elbows up to hold her head in her hands. Again I put my hands behind my own head, giving me some leverage so I could watch Kyla stare at me. The stare was similar to, but much more affectionate than, when she had found out I was a werewolf. The way her dark green eyes went over every inch of skin and every lock of hair it was as if she was seeing me in a whole new light.
Another minute passed before she put her hands down and spoke. “So, what are we?” I was trying to think of the best answer, the one Kyla wanted to hear, when the girl continued. “I mean, are we official? Or do you not want to be?”
I smiled and looked up in obvious thought so she would know I was considering the question. However, I already knew full well what she wanted. It was clear by the yearning in her eyes as she waited for an answer that she wanted an undeniable title for our relationship. And I wanted it too. “Well, Kyla Walters, will you be my girlfriend?”
“I thought you’d never ask!” she groaned in relief as she held back a grin, and throwing an arm over my stomach she leaned closer and kissed all over my face with quick, soft pecks. “Yes, yes, a million times yes.”
I playfully tried to catch her lips as they met my face, and as I did so out of the corner of my eye I read the clock. Without hesitation I felt my stomach tense with hunger, and sensing my distractedness Kyla stopped and waited patiently for my attention. “Sorry, I’m patrolling tonight and I wanted to eat first. Can you stay for dinner?”
With a final kiss Kyla pushed off the bed and held a hand out to help me up. “No, my parents are actually expecting me home already, so I should get gone.”
Finally having stood, I checked my hair in the mirror and instantly wished I’d brushed it before Kyla arrived. As I smoothed it I saw her watching me fondly. “Then what are you doing Friday?”
“Going to school,” she replied sarcastically as she shoved her hands into the pockets of her jacket.
“Friday night, smart ass.” I turned from the mirror and glared at her playfully. Taking a step forward I put my hands on her hips and pulled the girl close, planting a kiss on each cheek before landing one on her lips. Now that I’d g
otten what I wanted, I just couldn’t stop.
Kyla grinned as she realized she was being asked on a date. “I’m doing whatever you had in mind for us.”
I smiled, pleased, and followed her as she opened the bedroom door to leave. As we made our way down the stairs and out the front door I watched Kyla walk ahead, enchanted at the power the girl had over me. If she asked, I would give her my whole life. She was already my whole world.
I opened the car door for her to get in and waited for her to roll down the window before resting my elbows on it. “So Friday night, it’s a bit of a drive. Make sure you can stay out late and we’ll leave right after school?”
“Where are we going?” Kyla asked, and when I pursed my lips in silence the curiosity riddled her face. “Cami,” she whined, “Please tell me.”
I smiled, pulling myself off the window. “Bye, I’ll see you tomorrow.”
Kyla drove away, but not before letting me see the exaggerated frown on her face. Still smiling, I turned to see Luna sitting on the porch, playfully gawking at me. When I made my way to the porch and sat beside her, she happily bumped me with her elbow. The smile on her face was so wide I would’ve thought she was the one who’d been kissed.
“What are you smiling about?” I asked, turning to face her and leaning against the porch fence.
“I’m your twin,” Luna shrugged. “I can always tell what you’re feeling. And you, my friend, are too happy for words.” I leaned forward and hugged her as tight as I could, finally releasing all the giddy joy from my system, and in response Luna playfully shoved me off of her. “Please don’t ever hug Kyla that hard. You’ll break a bone or something.”
Her stomach growled loudly, reminding me that I had wanted to make dinner, so I patted my sister on the leg and stood up. “Come on, I’ll cook something.”
Standing up and following me into the kitchen, Luna sat at the table and folded her hands across the surface. “Okay, now tell me everything.”
The alarm clock roared loudly Monday morning, practically scaring me out of bed. But it wasn’t the loud sound that caused me to excitedly throw on my clothes as fast as I could. It was Camille. After getting home from her house the night before, I had tried to go to sleep as early as possible so that the morning would come sooner. Of course, I was so excited it took me hours to fall asleep.
Finally morning had come, and even though I had to wait four periods to at least have lunch with Camille, today I would see her again. It was a strange feeling for me to finally be with her. It undoubtedly felt right, and it had been something I’d wanted even before I realized it. Now it was like everything had fallen into place. It was exactly as it should be.
After hurriedly getting dressed I raced down the stairs, shoved down a piece of toast and jumped in the car. It wasn’t until I accidentally ran a stop sign and was relentlessly honked at that I realized I was being absurd. Calm down Kyla, I told myself as I took a deep breath and purposefully exaggerated my stop at the next stop sign. You’re going to see her no matter what. Minutes later I had already rushed to and visited my locker, and stood there for a good five to ten minutes waiting for Camille before the blonde rounded the corner.
She spotted me waiting for her and grinned, and after what seemed like forever she finally reached her locker and I threw my arms around her neck. Camille let a few seconds pass by before letting go and pulling away awkwardly.
“You’re not worried about people?” she asked. Slightly hurt, I looked around and shook my head. She sensed the hurt and hugged me again in effort to apologize. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it like that. I don’t care what people think, I just didn’t want you to feel obligated even if it made you uncomfortable.”
I leaned against some nearby lockers while she opened her own. It had never occurred to me to feel uncomfortable. I knew what I wanted, and now that I had it nothing would stop me from showing Camille that. “It’s not like we’re making out in the middle of the hallway. People hug all the time. Besides, I think everyone’s too self-absorbed to notice anyway.”
Camille smiled in agreement and shut her locker right as the bell rang. “I’ll see you at lunch, in the cafeteria?”
I nodded and grinned as Camille gave me an affectionate peck on the cheek, and then we went our separate ways. After the second bell rang for the start of first period my teacher assigned us work, individual or group, for the rest of class. Just as I finished opening my textbook, a short, thin brunette sat down next to me.
“Hey Sarah,” I greeted her.
Sarah smiled back at me. Every day that there was a school football game she was in her cheerleading outfit. I couldn’t help but notice how strange it was whenever I saw her in casual clothes. “Hey. How’d you like the party on Saturday?”
The teacher walked by and we both looked down, pretending to work on the assignment before I answered honestly. “Well I’m not really big on parties, but yours turned out okay.”
Sarah nodded before looking around awkwardly and leaning closer to me so only I could hear. “So um, are you and Camille like, you know, together?”
Surprised, I glanced up. I knew I should have expected it though. Everyone at the party heard Aaron yelling at me. I nodded. “Yeah, I guess since yesterday,” and then braced for having to defend myself.
Sarah sat there thoughtfully, and then smiled. “That’s cool I guess. I’ve never talked to her because she seems really shy, but she’s really pretty.”
Relieved, I let out a sigh and grinned appreciatively at the compliment. “Yeah, she’s a little shy before you get to know her.”
“I was talking about it with Kristen, you know her, she’s in your chemistry class, and she was really surprised because she kind of thought you had a thing with some guy named Jonathan.”
“What?” In utter shock I raised my voice, causing people around us to look over curiously.
Sarah giggled, “No need to get upset about it. She just thought that because he’s always staring at you. I think that’s a little creepy to be honest, so I’m glad you went with a better choice.”
After a moment of calming myself, I nodded my disgusted agreement. I shouldn’t have been surprised at that either. If anyone paid attention during lab they’d have noticed the way Jonathan looked at me. “He’s a huge creep. I hope you set her straight about that?”
Sarah tilted her head as she recalled what she’d said to her friend. “You know, I wasn’t sure about you and Camille then, but I did tell her that I thought it was weird.”
“Are most people here like you?” I looked down shyly. “I mean do most people not care about–”
“The gay thing?” she finished the sentence for me. I blushed as I nodded awkwardly. The word seemed so out of place, so powerful. I had never thought about it being a possibility, never thought about the fact that I might be gay. All I ever thought about was Camille, and that was all there was to it. “Um, I’d say it’s about fifty-fifty. Some people here were raised to care about it, and for others it doesn’t really matter. Personally though, as long as you’re happy I don’t think you should pay attention to what other people think.”
I nodded with a thankful smile, but was still in deep thought as I tested that three-letter word to myself. Hi, I’m Kyla and I’m gay. Hi, I’m a lesbian. I shook my head at the seemingly out of place words, and then smiled to myself as I put it a more comfortable way. I’m dating a girl named Camille. Eventually, maybe, I would use it to describe myself, but for now the fact that I wanted Camille was all I knew for certain.
Sarah and I worked together on the assignment until the bell rang, at which point we said bye and I made my way to second period, which ended up being less eventful than first. Eventually third and then fourth period rolled around and I made my way to chemistry. When I reached the room I stopped in the doorway, and my heart dropped.
All the lab equipment was set up on the tables, meaning we had an experiment today. My palms grew sweaty, the nervousness twisting my stomach in
to knots as I realized today was the day. If Jonathan was in fact there today, it meant at some point I’d have to go through his backpack. I shook out my arms and forced the rising nausea away, calming myself before I sat down at our table.
A few minutes after I sat down the bell rang, and Jonathan walked in and took his seat next to me. After the teacher explained the experiment he let us go to do our work, and Jonathan took his books out of his backpack and shuffled through some papers like I didn’t exist. What, now you don’t see me? Asshole. Jonathan looked up suddenly as if he’d heard my thoughts, and stared into my eyes with a cold hardness that gave me the chills. I smiled a quick, awkward smile and looked away, but he continued to stare, as if trying to get my attention.
I took a deep breath to will the nerves away so I could face him, talk to him without the slightest hint of fear in my voice. “What?” I finally asked with a scowl, purposefully sounding aggravated.
“Is it true what I’ve been hearing? You and Camille, a happy couple.” I didn’t like the ghoulish smile that spread over his face.
I shrugged obscurely. “It might be, it might not be. What’s it to you?”
He put his hand on my thigh, sliding it farther and farther upward, and the farther up he got the more toward the inside he shifted his fingers. “You know, she’s not as great as you think she is. My offer still stands, but I think we could skip dinner and get straight to the good part.”
In utter repulsion I slammed my hand down on his, stopping it before it got too far up my leg and pushed it off. “Are you trying to give her a reason to be pissed off?”
Maybe that’s why he was here in the first place. He’d already learned everything he could from watching Camille and me. The only reason I could think of that he had to keep coming to this class was to get to Camille, especially now that we were together. Or he was risking it so he could sell off those drugs I’d seen him with multiple time. Either way, he had to know that the Zades wouldn’t try to drag him out with all these students around and risk raising questions.