by Morgan James
“What about the video?” he asked softly.
I flinched and closed my eyes against the memory of it. I wasn’t sure I would ever get those images, the sound of Lila’s screams, out of my head. Eric’s hand slipped up my spine to cup the back of my neck. I blinked my eyes open, and my gaze collided with his.
“The day before the accident,” I admitted softly.
Still staring deeply into my eyes, Eric nodded. “Is that what you were going to tell me that morning?”
I nodded and licked my lips nervously. “I... I knew I needed to tell you, I just wasn’t sure how.”
He was silent for several long moments as he studied me. “I can understand that—but that’s my point. You were going to tell me.”
I nodded faintly at his rhetorical statement, and his fingers tightened ever so slightly around the base of my neck. “You asked me why I’m doing this, how I can just put it behind me.”
His hazel eyes bored into mine. “Forgiveness,” he said simply. “I love you, and I will always forgive you. But you need to forgive yourself.”
Tears sprang to my eyes, and I threw my arms around his waist as he hauled me against his broad chest. I held on for dear life as sobs welled up in my throat then finally ripped free, emotion pouring from me like a tidal wave. It was cathartic, like a cleansing, and after several long minutes, I felt as if I’d exorcised the fear and anger and guilt from my heart.
I slipped my fingers up his chest and rested them on the scar at the base of his throat. “Every time I see this...” I choked out as a shudder rolled over me. “I can’t help but think—”
“This was not your fault.” Eric grasped my fingers and pressed them to the faint pink line. “None of this was your fault.”
“But my father—”
Eric gave a hard shake of his head. “You’re not him. And I don’t care who your father was. All that matters now is you and me.” He lifted my hand to his mouth and kissed my fingers before releasing me. “In some fucked up way, this brought us together.”
I blinked rapidly. “But if he hadn’t—”
“Then what?” he asked as he slipped one hand over my cheek and into my hair. “We lived in Chicago our whole lives and never crossed paths. If shit hadn’t gone down that day, I would probably still be working with my team, and your dad would still be in charge of the family. You could be married off to some mafioso, or in college somewhere halfway across the world.”
I knew he was right, but it didn’t diminish my guilt. “I just wish...”
He seemed to read my mind, because he picked up my train of thought. “I wish things had turned out differently too. I would sell my soul to take back all the hurt you’ve endured.”
His words filled me with lightness. Selfless to a fault, his first thought had been of me instead of himself. Though I knew things between us wouldn’t always be easy, and we would still have to work to overcome our past, I clutched onto the tiny kernel of hope in my heart. “Do you think it will ever go away?”
He shook his head. “No, and I don’t want it to. I fell in love with you because of who you are. I want all of you, forever.”
Shedding the last of my reserve, I swayed toward him. His hand tightened in my hair, and he yanked me forward, sealing his mouth over mine. The kiss was urgent and frantic, primitive and animalistic. Our teeth clashed, and our tongues tangled in an exotic dance as old as time. Wrapping his free arm around my waist, Eric fell backward, pulling me down to the floor with him. I sank my fingers into his hair, shaggy now with recent growth. I’d never seen it this long before, and I twined my fingers in the light brown strands.
He let out a little growl as I turned, and his hands slipped down to cup my bottom, long fingers kneading the flesh. I winced, sucking in a sharp breath, and he immediately released me, ripping his mouth from mine. “Fuck. I’m sorry, baby. I’m so sorry.” He pushed up on his elbows, but I shoved him back down.
“No.”
He cocked an eyebrow as he lay back and watched me. I stripped my shirt over my head and felt his hard arousal swell beneath my hips where I straddled him.
“I need your hands on me—all over me.”
Reaching behind my back, I flicked the clasp of my bra and drew it down my arms. I bared myself to him completely, and he eagerly took up the reins. Tentatively, gently, he placed his hands on the indent of my waist then ran them upward. I let out a little hiss as his thumbs swept along the underside of my breasts, then up and over the hard peaks of my nipples.
He rolled us to the side, taking extra care as he gently lay me back on the rug.
“Good?”
I nodded, and he brushed his lips over mine. I opened for him as he swept his tongue inside, his familiar taste like a balm to my soul. God, I’d missed him so much. I let out a little whimper as he pulled away.
“Right here, baby. Just feel.” He kissed down the cord of my throat, one hand cupping my breast and teasing the stiff point. I shifted my hips as he knelt between my legs, his knees brushing the inside of my thighs and forcing them farther apart. His long fingers coasted over every inch of me, his mouth trailing soft kisses in their wake.
“Whose hands are all over your body?”
“Yours,” I breathed.
“Who’s the only man who will ever touch you?”
“You.” My fingers curled into the thick pile of the rug beneath me as his mouth moved lower. His tongue dipped into my belly button, causing me to jump before he continued his descent.
“That’s right,” he said before kissing the space just above my clit. “Me and only me, until I take my last breath.”
His tongue sliding through my drenched slit took my breath away, and I arched at the heady sensation. Spreading my legs wide and opening me to his intense perusal, he delved back inside, a man on a mission. He stroked and licked and sucked on the tiny nub, each ministration pushing me closer to the edge. A wave of ecstasy crashed over me, and I rode it as it lifted me up, close enough to touch the stars. Then it gradually lowered me back to reality, into the safety of Eric’s arms.
Right there in the light of the moon, he chased away the demons and darkness crowding my mind. He filled my heart with love and joy, leaving no room for anything else.
Thirty-Four
Eric
Time ceased to exist as I made love to her. Her body turned to putty in my hands, the tension draining from her muscles as her chest rose and fell with each breath. She looked so beautiful—so open, so free.
Taking one hip in my hand, I gently rolled her to her belly on top of the soft rug. Her muscles tensed as her back was exposed to me in the silvery light. Stark lines crisscrossed her body, from the top of her shoulders to the backs of her calves, and though I had seen them before, the sight still made my heart stutter in my chest. Her hands curled into fists, and she ducked her head as if to hide from me.
I skated my hands up her sides, then placed them on either side of her and leveraged my body directly over her. Her back arched slightly, her bottom lifting toward me, practically urging me to sink inside her. My dick swelled against my zipper as her ass pressed against me, and she gave her hips a little wiggle. It was tempting as fuck, but there was something I needed to do first.
Her body went rigid as stone when I kissed the first scar. My tongue and lips followed each dark line as if I could erase the memory of betrayal and anger burnt into her skin, and replace it instead with love and tenderness.
Over the past week, the wounds had begun to heal, and in time, they’d be gone completely. But the scars inside would remain until she purged them from her memory. I planned to be by her side for the rest of her days, replacing every bad memory with ten good ones.
I kissed another mark right above her bottom, and she inhaled sharply. Keeping one hand firmly on her back, I used one hand to flick open the button fly then worked the waistband down my legs. I kicked free of the fabric and fisted my cock as she shifted restlessly.
“Eric...”
“I know, baby.” Sliding my free hand under her belly, I lifted her hips until her pretty pussy was exposed to me in the moonlight. I let out a little hiss as I eased my shaft inside, and it was immediately enveloped by her wet heat. I wanted to bury myself deep inside her, stay there forever.
“Fuck, Jules...”
She pressed backward, and I sank in to the hilt. Our mingled gasps filled the air, and I clutched at her hips as I tried to clamp down on my control. The urge to move hard and fast was overwhelming. It’d been too damn long, and I needed to feel her.
I guided her to a sitting position, her back against my chest. Then I began to move. I nibbled along her neck and collarbone, the view as I stared down at her incredible. Her tits bobbed up and down with each shallow thrust, and I cupped them in my hands, feeling their familiar weight. Her nipples strained, tight and erect, and I brushed my thumbs over the sensitive peaks.
Her head dropped back to rest on my shoulder, and I bit down on the space where her neck met her shoulder. She let out a soft cry, and her pussy clenched around me. Fire burned low in my belly, and I knew it wouldn’t be long. Slipping one hand down her stomach to the apex of her thighs, I dipped into the silky wet heat. Her swollen clit was distended from her earlier orgasm, and she moaned as I circled the bundle of nerves.
One hand on her breast, I tweaked and teased the tiny point until she writhed in my arms, hovering on the precipice once more. She came apart with a ragged groan, her body falling forward under the force of her orgasm. She let out a little whimper as I pulled out, her sensitive inner muscles clutching at me as I withdrew. My dick ached to be back inside her, and I bit back an oath as my gaze swept over her perfectly shaped ass, evidence of her arousal glistening on her thighs in the moonlight.
Her legs quivered, and I stroked one hand over her bottom, cupping the perfect globe. “So beautiful.”
Her pretty green eyes watched me intently as I lay down next to her. “Come here, baby. I want you right here where I can see you.”
She braced her hands on my chest as I lifted her over me, and I lined myself up with her opening. Then I thrust hard. Gripping her hips, I fucked her slow and steady, so deep she’d feel me forever. Her teeth dug into her bottom lip, her eyes closing as her face contorted into an expression of sheer ecstasy. Just watching her pretty face turned me on, made me so damn hard. A tingling shot up my spine, and I knew I was getting close.
“You’re mine, Jules.” I threaded one hand through her silken locks and pulled her down to me. “Only mine.”
She made a sexy little sound as I rolled my hips, and I claimed her mouth, curling my tongue over hers. She ripped herself away, panting as she ground herself against me. “Come for me, baby... Need to feel you one more time.”
As if my words spurred her on, I felt her walls clench around me, and she let out a keening cry. Her pussy clamped down on me, and I gritted my teeth, trying to stave off my orgasm. I started to lift her off me, but her knees gripped my thighs like a vise.
“Jules... Goddamn it, baby, I—”
She shoved herself down on me one more time, setting off my release, and I let out a ragged groan. “Fuuuuck!”
Hot cum spurted deep, filling her up, and I pumped up into her twice more before collapsing on my back, Jules slumped over me. My cock still seated firmly inside her, I could feel our mingled lovemaking, and the sensation was erotic as hell.
We lay there in a tangle of limbs on the cold floor, moonlight streaming in around us, bathing us in a silvery glow. I stroked a hand up and down her back, our chests heaving, the only sound our labored breaths.
“Sweetheart?”
“Hmmm?” Her rumbled response vibrated through my chest, and I fought a smile at the sleepy sound of her voice.
“I didn’t pull out.”
“I know.” Her words were soft but sure.
Hope flared. Did that mean she planned to stay around?
“What if you get pregnant?”
She lifted her head and blinked those sensual emerald eyes at me. “You want kids, right?”
With her? Hell yeah, I did. “Only yours.”
“And I want yours.”
I framed her face in one hand and took her mouth in a single hard kiss. I’d meant what I said; She was mine, and I was never letting her go.
Jules lifted herself off me, then slipped down to cuddle against my side, and I sifted my fingers through her hair as I turned my attention to the night sky outside. Not a cloud in sight, thousands of bright stars shimmered against the inky backdrop. I dredged up a memory from what seemed like a lifetime ago, and I repeated the same words to her now as I had then. “Gonna be a cold night.”
I felt her smile against my chest, and she tipped her head up to look at me. “I never did look into that. Still sounds a little fishy.”
I let out a chuckle. “You don’t need to look it up. You should just assume I’m always right.”
She smacked my chest lightly, playfully, a smile curling her mouth. Suddenly, it slipped away and her eyes turned serious, her expression taking on a quality of remorse. “There’s something I need to tell you.”
She laid her left hand over my chest, and her gaze dropped to it for a moment. “I lost my ring. My uncle took it when I got to his house, and I couldn’t find it.” Tears clouded her eyes. “I’m sorry.”
Delving both hands into her hair, I drew her further up my body and kissed her forehead. “Don’t worry about that, baby. Besides...” I swiped out with my right hand, searching for my jeans. I felt a tiny bulge in the front pocket, and I fished out. “You didn’t lose it. I have it right here.”
Her mouth formed a small O, and her eyes lit up. “You found it!” She practically snatched it from my fingers. “But how?”
No fucking way was I ever going to tell her that story. I lifted one shoulder and traced my fingers over the back of her hand as she slipped it on. “It was returned to me afterward.”
Not a complete lie, but it was the best she was ever going to get from me.
“I was so worried it was gone forever,” she lamented softly.
Once more, I wondered what had transpired at her uncle’s house. “If it holds bad memories, if you want to replace it...”
I wasn’t sure how I would swing it, but I was sure I had some kind of return policy.
Jules’s chin jerked up. “No!” Her fingers curled into a little fist. “I want this one. It’s perfect.”
My stomach let out a little grumble, and Jules let out a tinkling laugh. “Did you work up an appetite?”
A smirk tipped up the corners of my mouth.” Yeah, but I’m not sure if I’m hungry or for food... or for you.”
Jules kissed my chest. “How about food, then me?”
It sounded like the best thing I’d heard in a long time.
Thirty-Five
Giuliana
“You ready?”
No. “Yep!” My voice was high and thin, and too damn chipper, a fact that went unmissed as Eric studied me.
“You’ll be fine, babe. Like ripping off a Band-Aid. Just gotta get it over with.”
“Right.” Sarcasm flowed from my tongue as I threw a glare his way. I really wasn’t in the mood for his tough love today.
He set down his coffee mug and stepped toward me, curving his hands around my shoulders as he studied me. “It’s because I love you that I’m doing this.”
“Mhmm.” I hummed a noncommittal sound as my gaze slid away. I couldn’t look at him. Those hazel eyes read me too well, and I was terrified of what he’d see deep inside. Fear. Cowardice. Shame.
“Sweetheart.”
I ignored him and stared fixedly at the wall.
“Look at me.”
His tone brooked no argument, and I forced myself to do as he commanded.
“This woman in front of me”—he gently squeezed my biceps—“this isn’t you. Don’t think I haven’t noticed. You’ve practically worn a hole in the floor from your restless pacing around the room. Yo
u’re anxious and on edge. But mostly...” He waited until he was certain he had my full attention. “You’re bored.”
I opened my mouth to refute his statement, but his lifted brow had me closing it again almost immediately.
“You need a purpose. Something to occupy your time. Being cooped up, even when I’m here, isn’t good for you. You need to go to work, get back into your routine.”
Two weeks had passed since I’d been released from the hospital, and I hadn’t stepped foot outside. It was stupid, I knew, but I couldn’t help it. There was no longer a threat hanging over my head; Massimo and Matteo were both gone, and no one was after me. Still, I couldn’t bring myself to leave the cabin. Every time I thought about it, my heart raced, and I felt on the verge of having a panic attack.
Eric had been encouraging me—pushing me, rather—for the past several days to go back to work. I knew I needed to get back into the swing of things, but I couldn’t get out of my own head. Finally, this morning, he’d threatened to throw me over his shoulder and carry me out the door kicking and screaming if he had to.
“I just...” I took a deep breath and directed my gaze out the window so I wouldn’t have to see the disappointment in his eyes. “I’m not sure I’m ready.”
His hands slid down my arms and laced our fingers together before bringing them to his lips. “Sweetheart, you’re the strongest person I know. I’ll never say I understand exactly what you’re feeling, but believe me when I say I can speak from experience. I’ve been in a situation similar to yours.
“Life as I knew it was over after that operation at the warehouse. I’d lost my partner, my best friend, and was damn near killed in the process. All I wanted to do was bury my head in the sand, turn off my heart and mind, and forget it ever happened. So I took the easy way out and ran; I left everything behind and moved out here. But you know what?”