by Claire Adams
“I’m freaking you out, aren’t I? I mean, I do want more, but I want you to want it, too. So much I’m determined to get what I want or fight my hardest.” His expression was sincere, and his brows rose like he was offering me a challenge. He had no idea. And when he learned the truth, his rejection would only be magnified by his kindness now.
I couldn’t find the words to tell him and the last thing I wanted was to end the pleasure for a heavy discussion, so I urged him back inside of me and hissed out in pleasure as his cock pressed its way back into my already tender channel. There was always a readjusting to him, but it was getting easier each time we fucked. We were getting too comfortable, too deep, and I was in over my head.
I gave in to the pleasure, but I couldn’t stop the nagging at the back of my mind. It was like a movie playing out to the end, when he learned of my lies and who I was.
It didn’t stop my orgasms, though, which he coaxed forth with precision like a master in control. His orgasm came with a growl, and it was so sexy a sound that I found room for one more of my own before we collapsed in a puddle of our making, spent and fed.
I expected him to pull me away to the shower, but instead, he curled against me, cradling me in his arms and pulled the covers up around my shoulders after he planted a soft kiss there. “Stay the night.” The words hung in the air a moment as I kept hearing them echo in my mind.
I contemplated how I could get out of it and if I wanted to get out of it. But I didn’t. I selfishly didn’t want the time to end. He’d know my secret soon enough, and this would be all over. I yawned and snuggled closer, pressing my ass against him. “Are you sure?”
“Yes. Unless you have to be at work early or something?”
“No, I have the day off.” I wasn’t about to tell him that I’d been sent home or why. No need to explain that head fuck to him. I owed him much more. I lay there thinking of ways to tell him my secret and came up short when I’d consider his reaction. There was no redeeming from this.
As I lay there, going back and forth on how nice it was to be in his arms and to hear his steady breathing and feel it against my neck, his phone beeped. He pulled away from me, letting a chill slide down my back. I turned over to snuggle against his side and feel the tight bulge of his pecs as he checked it to see what the notification was about.
He frowned and tossed the phone on the table so hard I wondered if something broke. “There’s nothing I hate more than a bunch of greedy leeches. Well, maybe a liar. I hate liars, too, but this family… God, I’d like to get through one fucking day without having to worry about this stupid lawsuit.”
He turned and faced me as I lay there frozen and brushed my messy hair from my face. “You’re the only thing that makes this shit better. Thanks for staying with me.” He closed his eyes and buried his face against me as I lay there dying inside.
Something on the phone must have reminded him of what was going on in life. Perhaps he had seen a text from his lawyer, there was no way to know, but I knew one thing: I’d rather be someone else. I’d rather be Lexa Lively than Alexandra Patterson, so I could be the person he needed me to be for him. The one to make it all go away and stay away, even after it was settled. I hated that as good as I was making things for him, I was going to make them terrible to the same degree.
Eventually, I was going to hurt him or anger him, and he would hate me. I hate liars. Who didn’t? I hated myself.
I was a liar. And what scared me most was that I wasn’t lying about how I felt. The feelings I had for him were all too real and intense, but it wouldn’t matter. In the end, he wasn’t in love with me. He didn’t even know who I was, so how could he be?
As I lay there drifting off to sleep, his words echoed in my head: I hate liars, I hate liars, I hate liars.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Aiden
Waking up with Lexa in my arms had done something to change my mood, and even though it had been over a day ago and she was gone to work, I’d woke up smiling again. She was monopolizing my thoughts. Considering my problems, that was a good thing.
I dipped my rag in the suds and brought the dripping thing over the top of my sister’s car. I’d decided it had sat too long looking like no one had driven it since the police had it towed back home from the airport. Ally would want it shining.
She’d been a regular at the detailing place downtown, and I remember teasing her that those men were interested in her more than the car. She’d winked and let me know she had her eye on one in particular herself. She’d always liked to shock me, and I’d warned her I’d go down there and crack skulls if it ended badly. A few weeks later, she came around with Shawn, and my worries of her slumming were over.
I’d washed my mom’s car before Ally’s and decided to make a full morning of it and hit the Rolls and Shelby next. I hated to look at the Rolls knowing it would be the first to go if those assholes got their way, and I wasn’t about to let anything bring me down.
The sun was shining, and the even the birds were singing at The Olde House, which was beginning to look like its old self. The gardener I’d hired, Pete Jr., had gotten the place looking as spectacular as the last time my mother had seen it. It made me feel better knowing she’d be proud, and I vowed all over again that I wouldn’t let anything happen to my home.
As I was finishing the rinse on the Mustang, my phone rang. Even though I saw it was Layne, I didn’t let that get me down.
“Hello, Layne. What’s the news?” There could only be one reason he’d call, and it was the lawsuit, so I continued rinsing as we talked.
“You’re not going to like it, but you’re going to have to go before the judge a week from Monday. The Pattersons are still playing hardball, so this is the way it is. They aren’t interested in any deal.”
“Okay, I’ll be there.” I didn’t have more to say, and I didn’t think it would do any good to get angry and spoil my mood.
“Is that it? You’re not going to bite my head off about it and tell me you’re not going?” I could hear the ice rattling in glass through the phone and imagined him sitting on his lanai sipping bourbons with his mistress while his old lady was away visiting her mother. That was the usual way of things with him, and now he’d decided he wanted to get cocky with me?
“Disappointed? I could fire you if it would make you feel better. But then who would pay for your mistress’ condo?”
His voice lowered to a whisper and footsteps told me he was seeking privacy. “I’m not seeing Alicia anymore, thank you. I’ve been trying to repair my marriage.” He let out a breath that seemed more like frustration than a need to exhale. “Just be there.” His end of the line went dead, and I couldn’t help but chuckle as I tucked my phone back into my shirt pocket.
“Good morning, Mr. Walker.” The voice came from behind me, and I turned to find Pete Jr. on the lawn holding a garden hoe.
“Hey, you got the place looking so good I figured I better clean these cars up and bring them outside.” The place looked as if there were a crowd of people living inside.
“That’s a mighty nice Mustang. A friend of mine had one he painted canary yellow with black racing stripes. You talk about fast.” He admired the car with a smile before it was back to business. “I’d like your permission to cut back one of the large oaks. It seems the last storm we had did some damage, and now it’s threatening to land in your mother’s rose garden.”
The oaks were a big part of our landscape, and I couldn’t bear to lose one, but mother’s roses had been her prize and Pete had finally gotten them back in shape. “Are we going to lose the tree or is this a trim only?”
“I’ll have to cut a big part out, but I’m trying to keep her standing. I think it’s the best call.” I had to appreciate the man for coming to me with it instead of figuring it out on his own. It meant he knew how important those trees were. It was why I trusted him with the task.
“Do what you feel is best, Pete. I trust you. Save as much as you can. I appreciate i
t, man.” I offered my cold, wet hand after wiping it on my jeans and after giving me a look that told me he wasn’t expecting a handshake, he offered his.
The man’s hands were calloused from hard work, and my father had always taught me to respect that. My father’s hands hadn’t been so rough, but my grandfather’s had. Dad had said that his father told him that his hands were rough so his sons wouldn’t have to be. I looked at my palms as Pete walked away and then I got back to work on the car.
The lawsuit was going to make sure I went back to work, and with the house looking like it did back in the days when it was magazine perfect, I wondered if I should set up my office right there at home.
So many people were doing it these days that clients didn’t mind, and considering that the home office was twice the size of Dad’s at the firm, it would be much more comfortable. I hated that I might have to work as a lawyer, but I’d do it to ensure a good life and to keep my home.
I thought for a moment about providing for a family and imagined Lexa and me living there together. That would be perfection. I could see her Camaro fitting in the garage, especially with the Rolls gone. I could let her use the Mustang, too; Ally’s not the Shelby. No, the Shelby was mine.
Thinking of her spread across it while I feasted on her sweet pussy made my cock ache. I glanced at the time and wondered when she’d go on break. I needed a moment with her and wondered if she’d be into a little phone sex. All I needed was her sweet voice. Damn. I was messed up over her. She had me good and fallen, and it was a serious crush.
I could see her in my plans for the future, not really knowing if she’d be interested in it or not. She talked like she might, but then again, she’d been a little off the other night. I wasn’t sure if she was nervous or what. I hadn’t really come out and told her I wanted us to take things to a new level, but I’d tried my damnedest to show her. I knew I’d thrown enough hints that she had to understand. I hoped I hadn’t turned her off or freaked her out. She didn’t seem like the kind of girl who was afraid of commitment.
I was the one surprising myself. I hadn’t ever been one for commitment and the fact that I was planning out a future, daydreaming of one with her no less, was so far out of my character I wondered what Ally thought of it. She’d always told me that one day, I’d find the one to make me settle down, but I’d been determined to stay wild and free. Sex had never been a challenge for me. I could have several different women interested at once and not be bothered, but Lexa, she made me want to put on blinders and settle down.
Not that I needed blinders. She was all I could see, anyway. I stopped a moment to wonder when this had happened, but then I shook it off and continued to dry the car. I didn’t know where Lexa lived. I’d have to ask her. It would be nice to get to know her in her home rather than at the hospital. I had so many things I wanted to know about her. I put down the towel and grabbed my phone. I’d had enough thinking about her and was too anxious not to try and message.
I texted a quick hello and let her know I was thinking about her. I waited a moment after I hit send and just when I was about to give up hope, she responded, I’ve been thinking about you all morning.
That was enough to stand my cock ramrod straight, and I got awfully crowded in my shorts. I leaned against the back of the car and put my hand down so that if Pete walked by, he wouldn’t notice. I sent her another message: I need to see you soon. I’m aching. Hopefully, she’d offer to soothe my ache.
Poor baby; you need a nurse? Before I could type back, my phone rang. I was about to cuss when I realized it was Lexa.
“Hey, you must be on a break.” I knew her shift was long with two breaks and an hour for lunch.
“No, I’m having an early lunch.” I could hear the crinkle of cellophane on the other end.
“You should have told me. I’d have come and joined you.” I would have her eating a nice meal and not some cello-wrapped junk.
“I never know when I’ll get to take it. Hold on a sec.” I could hear the sound of something against the phone, like cloth, but in the back was a male voice, deep and low, as if he were trying to whisper to her.
“I’m glad to see you back at it, and I owe you an apology for the other day — and dinner. Are you still up for it?” My blood raced right to my face as my nostrils flared. Whoever it was, was asking her out, and her response was like a punch in the gut.
“Sure, thanks,” I heard her say. Then footsteps faded, and she returned to the phone. “Sorry about that.”
“Who was that?” The jealous boyfriend in me wanted to drive over there and slaughter whoever that had been.
“Oh, that’s Dr. Rob. He sent me home the other day, and now he’s feeling bad about it. It’s nothing.”
“Nothing sounds like you have a date.” My tone was a little more acidic than I liked and green had never been my favorite color.
“Oh, I don’t know. He’s wanted to take me out to dinner for weeks now.”
“And, you’re considering it?” My good mood was done.
“Only to be polite; it’s not like I have an interest in him.” She lowered her voice.
“Then don’t go on a fucking date with him.” The words snapped out before I could hold my tongue.
“Aiden, are you jealous?” She gave a little giggle that chapped my ass even more.
“If I didn’t make myself clear enough, I want you, Lexa. I want fucking more, and I’m not into sharing you with some doctor.” I didn’t like the fact that she was around him all day, every day, either.
“I’m not seeing him. I won’t go. Are you angry?” Her voice broke, and I felt like shit that I’d upset her.
“Do I have a right to be?” I raked my hand through my hair. “If we’re going to do this, I’m all in. I’d like to know I can expect the same from you?”
“Of course, Aiden.” There was something sinking in her voice that I could only guess was uncertainty or maybe fear.
“I need you to be sure, Lexa. You should have told him no. That you were seeing someone.” Hearing her say sure like it was nothing had busted my balls and the ache that had been growing in them turned to anger in an instant.
“I’m sorry. He knows I’m interested in you, Aiden. I’ve already told him.” I wasn’t sure that made it better.
“You’ve discussed me with him?” My teeth gnashed.
“He was your doctor from the accident. He knows you’ve been a distraction since the moment I cut your clothes off. He’s had to reprimand me twice now because of you.” The word reprimand did nothing to ease my temper, and I imagined her bent over his knee spanking her naked ass.
“Why because of me? You’re not making any sense.”
“I have to go. I have to cut my lunch short. I’m sorry. We’ll talk about this later.” I sank against the car as her end of the line went dead.
Chapter Twenty-Six
Lexa
I had tossed and turned all night thinking about Aiden. I’d already hurt him, and I hadn’t done anything near as bad as telling him the truth about me. I’d decided not to call him when I got off work, and though he’d already texted me to see if I was okay, I was too riddled with guilt to answer him.
I dragged myself out of bed and without even taking the time to fix my hair, I threw on some jeans and a clean t-shirt and went to the only person who could tell me like it is: Bre Lively.
I drove across town and parked in front of her house, where I noticed some asshole had blocked the front walk. I got out and went up to the door and with tears in my eyes I knocked. Moments later, Bre came to the door, and she wasn’t ready to go shopping which was her normal Saturday morning routine. Her hair was a mess, and her cheeks were flushed, and she seemed to be out of breath. I realized who the asshole blocking the walk was when a man’s cough sounded in the distance.
“Lexa, hey you’re out early.”
“I’m sorry. Daniel’s here, isn’t he? I’ll go and call you later.” I turned, but her hand clamped down on my shoulder.
“Not so fast. You look like hell.” She pointed to the room behind her and when I hesitated, she pulled me inside. “I’ll put on a pot of coffee, and you can tell me what happened.”
“I’m such a screw-up.”
“You told him, and he’s pissed off at you?” Her brow lifted and she shook her head as she went for the coffeemaker.
“No, I haven’t told him. I’ve chickened out, and now he told me he wants more. He’s in relationship mode, and I haven’t even told him my real name.”
“Relationship mode, seriously? Whoa, Lexa, that’s bad. You’re going to have to come clean to him. Like, yesterday.”
“I know. And to make things worse, he overheard Dr. Rob flirting with me about owing me a dinner. Let’s just say that didn’t go over well.”
“He was jealous? Wow. So, did you tell him you’d be exclusive?”
“The other night we had a real date, and he took me out to Tipsy Paint, and we had dinner and then went back to his place. It wasn’t the usual fuck session, Bre. We made love. At least, until I slutted out and-”
Daniel coughed again, and I realized he could probably hear the whole conversation. My eyes widened, but Bre waved him off. “Never mind him. He’s watching TV.”
“Anyway, I’ve tried to keep from getting myself hurt. I didn’t think he could fall for me like this, and now I’m afraid I’ll hurt us both. I don’t know what to do.”
“You need to do something, for sure. If you can’t get the courage to talk to him, maybe you should start with your parents. Tell them how you feel about him. Maybe standing up for him will give you the courage you need to be honest with him.
“Maybe you could use that as an excuse that you wanted to tell him, but you didn’t want to lose him. If he cares about you like he says he does, maybe he’ll understand. Maybe he’ll be so happy that the lawsuit is over that he doesn’t care.”
“Yeah, right. He’s going to ditch me. He’s going to lose his mind and flip out on me, and then he’s going to tell me to get the fuck out. I can already hear him. The best I can do is tell my parents and beg him, but I think I’d rather keep what little dignity I have and make this whole suit go away for him. It’s the least I can do. Then, I’ll just leave him alone. Maybe he’ll think I moved on. If he hates me, it might be better for us both.”