by E. J. Graff
Prussia, marriage in eighteenth century, 202
Quadroons, in Alabama, 152
Quakers: marriage vows of, 203; “Shaking,” 180; single status among, 160
Rabbinical court, 195
race: blood metaphor and, 153; definition of, 152–53; suicide, 77, 159–60; taboo, 147, 149–55
rape, 54, 63, 68, 100, 182; marital, 55, 71, 193, 206, 222–23
Rappites, 181
real estate, 23, 27, 29
Reformation, 22–23, 83; divorce in, 232–33; marriage rules in, 64–68; rebellion against celibacy in, 64–68; sexual theology of, 70–71; single women in, 160. See also Protestants
registered partnership, 118
reproductive technologies, 115–17
Republic, 177–78
revolutions, republican, 22–23
rhythm method, 77
Richardson, Samuel, 244–45
Ripgin, Weisgin, 243–44
Rome, xi; adoption in, 110, 169; childhood in, 106; consent to marriage in, 242; divorce in, 97, 230–31; dowries in, 7; family in, 92–94, 134; marriage law in, 162, 194, 210, 250; parenthood in, 114, 124; patriarchy in, 92–93, 106–7; pauper marriages in, 19; power of family in, 9–10, 56; serial polygamy in, 169; sexual attitudes in, 55–56, 57; slaves in, 18, 93
Roosevelt, Franklin and Eleanor, 226
Roosevelt, Theodore, 77, 159
Rose, Phyllis, 215
Russell, Bertrand, 189
Sacrament, marriage as, 65–66, 89, 194–96, 201, 203, 206
same-sex couples, xii, 3, 39, 40, 42–44, 46, 48, 50, 51, 90, 189, 190, 214, 253; adoption by, 118; custody battles between, 143–44; as parents, 105, 117–18, 125–30, 131–35, 140–44, 252; relation to divorce of, 40–42, 241; sex in, 82, 84–86, 132; status compared with unmarried heterosexual couples, 43, 209–12, 216
same-sex marriage, x, xii, xiv, 2, 36, 48, 52, 55, 84, 86, 87, 90, 105, 113, 142–44, 229, 239, 240–41, 251–53; compared to interracial marriage, 148, 154–55, 158–60; compared to polygamy, 171, 176–77, 252; contemporary debate about, 252–54; equality in, 42, 223, 224–26; as free choice, 246–48, 253; and legal rights, 43–44; and property law, 42; as public institution, 211–12, 214–15; and utopian traditions, 186–90
Sanger, Margaret, 78–80, 189, 207
Saturday Review (Britain), 32
“Save Our Children” campaign, 86
Scandinavia: protections for same-sex couples in, xii, 44, 52, 118, 252; research on children in, 123; unmarried birth rates in, 102
Schwartz, Pepper, 33, 143
separation distress, 120
Sermon on the Mount, 178
sex: and health, 86; for intimacy, 68, 70, 71–72, 81, 83–86; legitimate, 53; as marital obligation, 56–57, 68, 69; as moment of marriage, 199; monastic rules about, 60–61, 63; between persons of same sex, 63; philosophies of, 54–87; pleasure in, 54, 57, 60, 67, 68, 69, 78, 81, 82, 83; premarital, 67; for procreation, 59–63; Protestant attitudes toward, 64–68; Refraining ideology of, 54, 57–59, 64–67, 72, 73, 77, 83; Refreshing ideology of, 54, 69–87; Reproducing ideology of, 54, 60–61, 76, 77; required, 68; Roman attitudes toward, 55–56; rules about, 54
sexes, battle of, 216–17
sexual freedom, theology of, 189
sexual theology: of Church, 59–63; of free-lovers, 71–73; of Jews, 56, 69–70; of Reformation, 64–68, 70–71
Shakers, 180, 183, 185
Shakespeare, William, 54, 229, 247
slaves, 54; inherited condition, 150–51; kinship among American, 95; marriage among, 16–19; and polygamy, 175; Roman, 18, 55, 56, 93, 211
Slee, Noah, 80
Smith, Adam, 36
Smith, Joseph, 171, 172–73
Smith, William Benjamin, 145
socialism, 182–85, 190, 239
society, role of kinship in, 167–68
Society for the Suppression of Vice, 75–76
Sodom, 161, 239, 252
sodomy, 68, 85, 144
South Africa, xii, 135, 211, 252
Southern Baptist Convention, xiv, 159
Soviet civil code, free-love in, 183–84
sperm bank, 105
spouse, definition of, 50
Stalin, Joseph, 184
Stanton, Elizabeth Cady, 174
Stein, Gertrude, 37, 224
stepchildren, 97–98, 137–38
step-parents, 137–38, 139, 246
Stone, Lawrence, 10, 94, 202
Stone, Lucy, 220, 223
Stopes, Marie, 72
Subjection of Women, The, 224
surrogacy, 115–16
Sweden, parenthood in, 123
Swoopes, Sheryl, 224
Synge, John, 20
Talmadge, Herman E., 154
tax, 7, 9, 33, 39, 41, 49, 50, 51, 103, 112, 142
Thecla, 58
Times, The (London), 31
Tinker’s Wedding, The, 20
Tom Jones, 26, 245
transaction, marriage as, 4–11
Turner, Ike and Tina, 226
“two-parent” advantage, 120, 124–25, 133–35
United States v. One Package, 81
U.S. census, 37
U.S. Supreme Court, 35, 53, 83, 156, 191, 238
utopian communities, 147; arrogance of, 190; celibacy in, 179–80; living in, 186; marriage philosophies of, 177–85, 250
utopian tradition, lesbians and gays and, 186–90
Vaseline, 74
verba de praesenti and de futuro, 197–98, 200, 207, 211, 214
Vermont, xii, 117, 118
Victoria, Queen of England, 226
Victorian era. See nineteenth century
Wardle, Lynn, 223–24
Warner, Michael, 188, 189
Way of the World, The, 215
Weber, Max, 35–36, 212
weddings, x, 4, 5, 18, 20, 55, 61, 102, 147, 185, 190, 195, 204, 242, 246–47, 249
Weekly Standard, The, 224
Weinsberg, Hermann von, 243–44
Wells, H. G., 80
wetnursing, 96, 106
White, Edmund, 188, 189
White, Walter, 154
white supremacy, 157–58, 223
widows and widowers, 48–50, 53, 104, 194, 199, 204, 210, 211, 212;
children of, 119, 135
Williams, Vanessa, 224
wives, financial position of, 26–34, 40–41, 87, 217, 240, 252
women: chastity of, 100; equality of, xii, xiv, 25, 33, 36, 42, 78–81, 114, 159, 206–7, 215, 217, 219–25, 246, 251; financial protections for, 27; arriage and, xiii, xiv, 26–34, 215–26, 240; nineteenth-century position of, 29–33; as property, 26–28
Woodhull, Victoria, 189, 206
Woolf, Virginia and Leonard, 226
work, 11–16, 21–22, 25, 27; as definer of family, 94–95; and right to marry, 35; separation of from home, 27–29; spousal cooperation in, 11–12; women’s right to, 36, 240
World War II fathers, 137–38
Young, Brigham, 172, 175
Youngman, Henny, 216
Zablocki v. Redhail, 35
Zoarites, 181
Beacon Press
Boston, Massachusetts
www.beacon.org
Beacon Press books
are published under the auspices of
the Unitarian Universalist Association of Congregations.
© 1999, 2004 by E. J. Graff
Foreword © 2004 Richard Goldstein
All rights reserved
Text design by Charles Nix
Composition by Wilsted & Taylor Publishing Services
Foreword adapted from Richard Goldstein, “The Radical Case for Gay Marriage,” which first appeared in the Village Voice, September 3–9, 2003. Used by permission of the author.
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Graff, E. J.
What is marriage for? / E. J. Graff.
p. cm.
Includes index.
ISBN 0-8070-4135-1 (pbk.)
eISBN: 978-0-8070-8637-7
1. Marriage. 2. Same-sex marriage. I. Title.
HQ734.G716 1999
306.81—dc21 98-54818