“Let’s try another few tries then we’ll call it a day” he instructs, before long I’ve mastered sneak attacks like a ninja and it’s the end of today’s training, we retreat to the kitchen for breakfast, “so does Sam like you the way you hoped?” Colonel asks, “actually it turns out it was a big mistake” I sigh.
“Wasn’t that the desired outcome, now she won’t have to break up with Damon therefore you avoid an uncomfortable situation” the frying pan sizzles from the eggs and bacon as he speaks, “that’s true but I’m actually disappointed, and I don’t know what that means”, Colonel brings over our breakfast and takes a seat beside me, “I think that means you like her” he comments.
“Which is problematic since she doesn’t feel the same, and confusing because does that mean I like girls, or I like girls and boys?” Colonel smiles, “just take it one day at a time, you’re young you’ve got all the time in the world to decide what you want and who you are” I nod in agreement and enjoy my breakfast.
“Thanks for being here with me…dad” he smiles “from now on I always will be, you’ll never have to be alone again I promise firefly” I smile back and am comforted that I have someone who I can trust and rely on again.
I return to my room but find Sam sat on my bed, “what are you doing here?” I ask unable to meet her eyes the hurt she caused still too fresh to ignore, “I wanted to talk to you, I’m really sorry for hurting you I never meant that, I don’t really know why I kissed you or why I don’t regret it, I want us to be okay again, I know I upset you by kissing you and if you want I won’t do that again” she fumbles out her words, I look up to see desperation clear in her eyes, I take a seat beside her with a deep sigh “so you don’t regret the kiss either?” I ask her, “of course not, I know I said it was a mistake but I didn’t mean that, I guess I was just confused and I didn’t want to hurt Damon…” she trails off.
“Look the truth is I like you a lot which is why I kissed you, but I don’t want to lie to you so I need to confess I’m not Sam, I’m the other her Amaya” I’m taken aback by her confession, Sam warned me not to trust Amaya and she’s bad, but she’s been truthful and sincere whereas Sam lied to me.
“Sam told me you’re bad and not to trust you, but you truly like me?” I ask, she nods with a sweet smile, “I know it sounds strange I’m technically Sam but I like you in the way she doesn’t, she says I’m bad because that’s the only part of me she has seen, but it’s different with you, I want to be kind and happy when I’m with you”.
“How will this work exactly, you tell me you’re Amaya and we can get to know each other each time you take control, wouldn’t that be cheating on Damon?” I ask, “I’m not Sam so it wouldn’t be, if you’re uncomfortable with this I get I won’t pressure you, but if you’ll let me I’d like to get to know you better if you allow me to” She says.
“This is very confusing, but I know I liked the kiss and I like you, oh screw it!” I exclaim and lean forward until her lips are against mine, her soft lips moving against mine excited yet slow, I soon start to feel embarrassed from throwing myself at this girl I barely know, I pull away after a few moments “sorry I kind of attacked you there” I laugh nervously, “I didn’t mind” she chuckles.
“You can say no but could we hang out in my room for a while, I’d like to get to know you Amaya” she nods, “I’d like that too” we lie down side by side and start talking, I ask her when she started to exist, we talk for hours about our large array of thoughts and dreams, and she shares her experience of only been half a person that was unknown to the world, and how alone she felt.
“Sam sort of always knew I was here but her parents thought she was psychotic because she would be different when I took over, but even when she took the control she spoke to me so her parents thought she was mentally ill and that she had a split personality, but in truth I am just another side to her that is still her in the way I look but different in feeling and personality, did she ever tell you she was supposed to be a twin?” Amaya asks, I shake my head in response.
“Well she was supposed to be part of a twin but she absorbed me in the womb, so I guess that’s why I exist” she explains, I am taken aback for a moment processing the new information that’s been thrown at me, “does she know that? She told me she has a split personality” I ask.
“At first she knew I was her sister but over time because of her parents she decided to believe them and doesn’t really believe I’m real”.
“That must be so tough, the only person that knows you exist and even she doubts your existence” she lowers her eyes with a sigh.
“It has been, which is why I’m glad I have you to talk to, you’re the first person that’s made me believe I am real”, after such a deep talk we lay side by side in silence enjoying one another’s company, and for the first time in a long time I start to feel peaceful.
Colonels POV
Some time after training with April I decide to visit the kitchen where I know Sarah is cooking lunch, “Colonel what a pleasant surprise" greets Sarah, “lunch smells good" I praise, “it’s just some vegetable soup" she shrugs, she stirs the soup then turns back to me.
“I haven’t seen you around much lately, what have you been up to?” she asks, most days I chat with Sarah but with April taking up lots of my spare time I haven’t been visiting as much.
“I’ve been spending time with April” I reply, she beams back at me, “I’m so glad, with how they reacted that first night I worried you wouldn’t work things out" I nod in agreement, “despite how much time I missed, their mother did an excellent job, they’re great kids" I sigh, I just wish I could have made up with their mother while she was still around.
“I’m glad they have someone like you in their lives, someone to depend on, they may not be little kids but they still need someone to take care of them" I smile in appreciation of her words, I help her with the rest of lunch to make up for the time I’ve been away from her.
Chapter 10
Amaya’s POV
I sigh in content feeling April’s warmth radiating beside me as we both lay in peaceful silence just enjoying each others company, I have finally opened myself to someone and it felt good, like a huge weight was lifted off my chest, I finally feel like a real person with thoughts and feelings, this blissful feeling is soon short lived from the prodding by Sam inside my head.
I know this is her wanting the control, I give in knowing she deserves to spend some of our remaining time how she wishes too, “I’ve got to go April it’s Sam’s turn” we both sit up, she nods in understanding and hugs me goodbye, and the peacefulness is now replaced by guilt of the secret that is not mine to share, I wish I could tell her what happened and that I don’t know how much longer me and Sam have left, I wish I could tell her if I was my own person I would spend every remaining moment I have left with her, but instead I force a smile and leave her room.
April’s POV
Once Amaya has left, with many thoughts buzzing around my head I decide to visit the garden again to spend some time alone, once reaching the garden bench that resides in a quieter area of the garden, I find a boy I’ve seen before sat alone, I recognise him as Michael who helped my brother when he was hurt.
“Sorry I didn’t know someone was here, I’ll leave you be" I say and start walking back, “there’s enough room for two if you would like to join me" he smiles in a friendly manner.
“Sure" I return his smile and sit beside him taking in the beautiful scenery with a sigh.
“You seem as though you have a lot on your mind, it explains why you have come alone" he muses, his dark skin glistens under the sun, and his hazel eyes squint at its brightness.
“You’re not wrong there, it’s been a crazy couple of days" I admit, “I know we hardly know each other but you can tell me about your troubles if you like, sometimes it’s easier to confide in a stranger" he replies keeping his gaze on the scenery in front of him.
Strangely I feel compelled to spea
k with him, he seems quiet and trust worthy, not the type to gossip to others.
“I feel like so much is happening in such a short span of time, I just start to relax and something new happens to shake things up, my mum dies, my dad jumps back into my life, I stab my brother and I fall in love with my best friend" all my thoughts tumble out of my mouth at once.
“That would be a lot for anyone to handle, when you lose someone important to you, it’s a pain like no other, like a part of you goes with them, despite what others must say you’ve handled all that’s happened extremely well, you’re not hiding in your room, you’re not taking it out on others, I’m sure inside you hurt but on the outside you've survived all this pain and no one gives you enough credit" I almost tear up at his words, he selflessly listened and was kind.
“Thank you" is all I can reply to his kind words, “you’re here alone too, do you also have a lot on your mind?” I ask him, “truthfully I come here when I think of my family, I haven’t seen them since the zombies came and I worry about them sometimes, I was asking god to protect them" he admits with a small smile.
“I'm sure they’re fine, they’re most probably doing the same thing about you" I reassure him, “I better get back inside, but I hope to see you again" I smile and leave him alone with his thoughts.
Sam’s POV
Internally I thank Amaya for allowing me to be with Damon with the time I have left, I walk across to Damon’s room and knock, “come in” his voice greets, I open the door and join him on the bed, I lean on him with his arm securely wrapped around me surrounding me with comfort and a feeling of safety.
“where have you been? I feel like I haven’t seen you around lately, like even when I see you you’ve been somewhere else mentally” I feel guilt from Damon’s comment but I shrug it off, “I guess I’ve been distracted with April stuff, but we’ve worked it out so I’m all yours now” I try to reassure him.
“I’m glad you guys worked stuff out, I’ve just missed you I know we can’t have a normal relationship during a zombie apocalypse, but I still want to be with you and survive with you, because I love you” I smile and look up at him, “that’s so sweet, I feel the same way-“ I’m cut off by a cough, I move away from him and try to clear my throat, I look down at my hands and find blood again and notice the veins on my arms have risen even more, I start to feel dizzy and my vision blurs until I’m seeing all black and I can hear Damon’s voice shouting me in the distance.
When I wake up a concerned Damon is knelt above me shaking me and asking if I’m okay, “I’m okay sorry for scaring you” I say as I sit up and regain my vision, I’m handed a glass of water and take it gladly, “what happened, you started coughing then fainted” Damon says his voice shaky.
“I haven’t been sleeping well so I guess I’ve made myself sick from it” I say with a shrug, he sighs “get in my bed and get some sleep, but if something was wrong you would tell me wouldn’t you?” he asks as he helps me into bed, the guilt eats at me again, I could tell him and be truthful, but why hurt him more than I have to.
“Of course love” I smile and drift off into a deep sleep, I dream I’m alone in a dark forest moving deeper in a slow swayed walk and can’t move any faster, when I try to call out my words are replaced by moans and growls, “a zombie!” April calls out and pulls out her bat, I spin around trying to see the zombie but it’s just the two of us, she runs towards me and swings her bat, she hits me across the head making me fall to the ground, I look beside me at a puddle and the reflection is unrecognisable, a monster with white eyes, pale pasty skin and matted bloodied hair, then I realise it’s no monster, it’s me, I turned into the zombie.
Amaya’s POV
I wake in a fright of the dream, I look across at the mirror on the dresser and sigh in relief that I recognise myself looking back and not some monster, although my skin is now much paler than it once was, I peak at the vein under my sleeve and find it’s now reached my shoulder.
I throw my legs off the side of the bed and head back to my own room to shower and dress, whilst I dress there’s a knock at my door “it's April” the voice announces, I answer the door and lead her inside.
“I was thinking we could go walk around the gardens today” she says with a smile, I nod in agreement and follow her, my days are spent with April and Sam's with Damon giving them both our time, for some time I don’t have another coughing fit, and think I have somehow been cured of the disease but know it’s just wishful thinking and know it’s all too good to be true, each day I check the veins on my body which seems to grow more and more.
Having spent every day with Damon or April I sneak off to take some time for myself, I head to the library and notice a girl with ginger curls who I recognise as Valerie someone I’ve not really taken the time to get to know, although with the current situation there would be no point now anyway.
I find the book I wanted to read and take a seat at one of the desks, “you’re Sam" the girl comments causing me to lift my head, “y-yes" I stutter not used to having to act like Sam as myself, her shoes click on the floor as she approaches me.
“You’re Sam but you’re also not...” I feel my face drain of all colour at her words, I gulp but try to shrug her off, “that’s insane” I argue, “perhaps, but so is the fact you look like Sam on the outside, but on the inside you’re someone else" how could she possibly know that.
“Before you ask no one told me, I observe so I see more than others do, and from what I’ve seen it’s clear there’s Sam April’s friend and another in Sam’s body that’s in love with her" she says, I don’t respond shocked she’s guessed all this from just watching us, “I’ve seen how you are together in this form, she loves you" she smiles kindly.
“I’ll leave you be, I know you want space you’re just to polite to say so, just... be careful, that bite is fatal" she’s gone as fast as she was here, my stomach is in knots from knowing someone else knows my secret, but strangely I know she wont tell anyone.
Later April and I lie in the garden as we do most days, “it’s such a nice day” April comments as we lay side by side in the grass and flowers, she lifts her hand to shade her eyes from the sun, “yeah days like these are so rare, it’s so nice to just enjoy the sun and let all our worried drift away” she smiles and nods in agreement, she leans down and kisses me softly, its only short but warms my face all the same.
“I think life is so crazy you know? Like if you hadn’t kissed me that day I would never know who I truly am, like I always felt something was missing and you helped me realise it, and if you didn’t I would still try and get with pricks like Nathan” she laughs.
“I know exactly what you mean, life is so unpredictable” I say and a moment later the heavens open up and release buckets of water ruining our perfect day, we scream and run inside together hand by hand, we giggle as we run to my room to dry off.
Finnian is curled up on the bed as usual, “I’m going to grab a towel I’ll be right back” she says and leaves me alone for a moment, I take a deep breath and walk towards the mirror, I roll up my sleeve and feel my stomach drop at the sight of the veins that have developed even more and have become even darker, I jump back in surprise at April’s shocked face behind me in the mirror, I hurriedly roll back down my sleeve and turn to face her.
“Oh April hey I didn’t hear you come back in” I say awkwardly hoping she didn’t see my arm, but this hope is short lived, “what happened to your arm?” She asks worry in her eyes as she approaches me, I inch back as she moves closer until I knock into the dresser, “I don’t know what you’re talking ab-“ I try to evade her to no avail “I saw something on your arm, show me!” She demands angrily.
With a deep sigh I pull back my sleeve to reveal the bite that is now dark and bruised with dark veins across my arm, she’s silent at first and with a deep breath asks what happened, but she asks as though she doesn’t truly want to know her eyes water as though she will cry but she balls her arms into fists to keep her
composure.
“That first outing we took, that zombie got on top of me and left a mark that turned into this” I sigh and can’t bear to look at the angry, upset and disappointed look she is staring me down with.
“That was weeks ago, why didn’t you tell anyone, why didn’t you tell me?” She demands, “we could have done something, but you just left it to fester until it turned you into one of those… things!” She screams, tears stream down her face but her face remains angry.
Finnian runs from the room after our yelling woke him, “I couldn’t tell anyone they would’ve killed me!” I scream back, “I was… I was scared” I admit in a softer voice.
“I wouldn’t let anyone hurt you or Sam” She assures, I scoff anger now radiating off me, “that really worked out for your mum” a look of hurt crosses her face and I instantly regret my words.
“I can’t believe you said that, Sam was right about you you’re just angry and evil” she shouts as she runs from my room slamming the door behind her.
I sink to the floor and hold my knees allowing all the emotions I had been holding in to flood out in my tears, all the fear, the anxiety and anger is released in one go.
Once there’s nothing inside me left to cry I remain sat in one spot staring aimlessly at the wall, until I feel a tickle in my throat causing me to cough violently and painfully, I gasp as I regain my breath again, I look down at my hands and feel my breath catch in my throat there’s blood again but this time it’s black like tar, it’s started and there’s no way to stop it now, I’m becoming one of them, I’m becoming a zombie.
Aprils POV
Once the door slams behind me I run to my room, my vision blurred by my tears, I slam the door behind me once I reach my room, I scream and cry and try to fathom that my best friend and the girl I’m in love with are both dying and there’s nothing I can do to stop it or slow it down, she’ll become one of them and there’s only two choices, leave her out there to become one of them or kill her so she’s preserved how we know and love her, so she’ll never have to become a monster, the pain aches inside me and all I can do is allow it to flow.
Infection Z Page 8