But he didn’t, so I slowly backed out of the bathroom, and didn’t loose a breath until I’d rounded the corner and locked eyes with Roman as he came out of the locker room, his duffle slung over his shoulder.
“Teagan?” He asked, his eyes concerned as he read the panic on my face. “You okay, babe?”
I nodded rapidly and grabbed his hand, hauling him down the hallway and darting into Nixon’s private shower. I thanked the NFL gods that Nix had left it unlocked.
“What are we doing?” Roman asked, his tone softening as I locked the door behind us.
“I need you,” I admitted the truth, panic still racing in my blood. I crushed my lips on his, siphoning off the love and heat and everything that was Roman to quell the tidal wave inside me.
I couldn’t let Rick win.
“I’m here,” he said against my mouth but took my face in his hands to draw my gaze. “What’s wrong, honey?”
Roman deserved to know how terrified I’d been at the simple thought of Rick intentionally hurting him…but I also deserved the chance to hold my own, to handle it on my own, and not use him as a crutch to solve a problem.
The idea, the images that flashed in my head when Rick rattled off his threat? I didn’t want to admit it, but it shook me worse than him sneaking up on me in the lady’s room. Because Roman…he was my everything.
And right now, I needed more than anything to feel him, love him, hold him. Needed to ensure my mind and soul that he was here and strong and wouldn’t be tainted by the darkness of my past.
“Do you trust me, Roman?” I asked slightly breathless.
“You know I do.”
“Then make love to me right now,” I said, my hands running over his body. “Please.”
A deeper understanding flashed over his features—some unspoken bond between us coiling and raging as he interpreted the panic racing right next to my need for him. And he didn’t blink before he hooked his hands underneath my ass and lifted me, spinning me to press me against the door.
A few breaths later, my leggings were gone, and he was burying himself deep inside me. I clung to his shoulders, completely at his mercy as he took me against the closed door. As he held my gaze and claimed my mouth, my body, my soul. As he pushed me farther and farther out of my panic, out of my fear, out of my doubt, and closer and closer to the pure love and empowerment that came with him.
God, he was incredible as he held me effortlessly, thrusting his hard length inside me until my eyes rolled back in my head. Until my toes curled and electricity shot down my spine. Until I shook around him as I flew apart, as I shattered and screamed his name.
“Teagan,” he sighed my name after he’d came too. He grazed his lips over mine, his eyes searching, loving. “Are you okay?” He asked, content to hold me like he could do it for the rest of our forever.
I leaned my forehead against his, my breath ragged from the way he’d claimed my body.
“I am now,” I answered honestly.
Roman smoothed my hair away from my face, something in his eyes searching for a truth I wasn’t ready to give him. Because if he knew what Rick had threatened…
I swallowed hard. I wouldn’t let that happen.
It was my turn to protect Roman.
And I just hoped like hell I was strong enough to do it.
17
Roman
The roar of the crowd fed my adrenaline as we lined up on the sixty for the snap. We were down, it was the fourth quarter, we had seven minutes to go, and this was our fourth down. We needed this, and we needed it badly.
Winning this one would put us first in our division and bring us into the New Year, holding a spot for the playoffs, and it was all on me.
I was pure energy on that line, my body humming with anticipation and ready to explode.
The ball snapped.
My feet flew, passing by Nixon only long enough to take possession of the ball. I tucked it securely into the cradle of my arm, then ran my ass off.
There. I spotted a linebacker and dodged his lunge, feeling the brush of his fingers along my arm as I made it past the line.
Baker appeared ahead at my left and threw a block to their cornerback that got me through another five yards, managing to stay on his feet just ahead.
Their safety rushed at us as my world narrowed to the breath in my lungs, the turf beneath my feet, and massive pumps of my legs, propelling me down the field. We’d secured a first down, and that end zone was calling my fucking name.
You can make it.
Another hit of energy burst through my system with the thought, carrying me even faster.
Just get past the safety.
Their rapidly-approaching safety was a heartbeat away from Baker.
Rick stumbled, tripping at my left and going down hard.
No!
I didn’t have time to make it to the sideline—
He hit me like a freight train at full speed, hurling me sideways. I heard the crunch. I saw…black.
* * *
“I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry.”
The words belonged to Teagan, but why did she sound so damned sad? So far away? I fought through the layers of fog clouding my brain and battled my own body into consciousness, prying open my eyes by sheer force of will.
The overhead lighting may as well have been a sleeve full of daggers stabbing into my eyes. Pain blared through my body like an alarm, radiating from my head and spreading down my side. I closed my eyes, and it lessened, but not by much.
I knew the sterile smell of a hospital all-too-well, and it filled my nose with every breath I managed to drag through the vise on my chest.
“So sorry. I should have listened,” Teagan whispered, and I felt her hand on mine, absently stroking my palm.
“Baby, there’s nothing to be sorry about,” I croaked, managing to drag my dry tongue across my parched lips.
“He’s awake!” She shouted.
Okay, she could be sorry about the shouting, because that shit hurt.
I braved the knives of fire in my eyes and forced my lids open in time to see her hasty retreat to the wall, making room for the team of doctors above me.
“There we go. Mr. Padilla, you are at Duke University Hospital. Can you tell me your first name?” The doctor shined a flashlight across my eyes.
“It’s Roman, and if you shine that thing in my eyes again, we’re going to have problems, doc.” I forced my hands to stay at my sides and not shove him across the room.
“Light sensitive,” he noted to a hovering nurse.
“Where’s Doc Overton?” I asked.
“Right here.”
Our team doc appeared at my left side, giving me the I’m-not-going-to-tell-you-but-you’re-fucked smile.
As his face came into focus, my stomach turned over, and my mouth watered. “I’m going to be sick.”
A blue tub appeared, and I jolted to a sitting position as my stomach heaved up what was left of my breakfast.
Light sensitive. Nausea. Fuck me. I had a concussion.
“How long was I out?” I managed to ask as they carted the tub away.
“A little under an hour,” Doc Overton answered. “We’re waiting on your CT scans.”
Jesus, I’d slept through that, too? Must have been some hit. As if acknowledging what put me here in the first place had switched on my nerve endings, my side erupted in acute agony. I hissed, automatically reaching for my ribs.
Doc Overton stopped me, blocking me with his arm. “Those are bruised.”
“Fuck.” No wonder it hurt to breathe.
Teagan sniffled, and I reached for her hand. She was pale, red-eyed, and mascara streaked as she stepped to my side, taking the space on the right side of my head.
“I’m fine, baby,” I assured her. “You’ve seen me take worse.”
She forced a weak-ass smile as an answer.
“Question of the day. What was the score?” I asked Doc Overton.
He la
ughed. “Twenty-seven to twenty-one. You held on to the ball, Padilla, and Malone caught a nice one off the next play.”
“Thank God.” I let my head fall back against my bed, which had been raised to accommodate my sitting position.
A tear slipped down Teagan’s cheek.
“Hey, no crying. We’re headed to the playoffs.” I squeezed her hand and stroked my thumb over her engagement ring.
“You are headed for some rest,” the Duke doctor challenged.
“At least until you clear concussion protocol,” Doc Overton amended.
“I figured.” Two weeks. I’d miss next week’s game but could make it back for the first round if I healed up quickly. I didn’t give a shit about my ribs. I’d played hurt before—the adrenaline usually masked the pain. But I knew enough about CTE to even argue about getting back out there before my brain healed up.
“We’d like to keep you overnight,” the Duke Doc announced.
I sighed.
“It’s already pretty late, and we just want to get a good look at your scans,” Doc Overton added in. “We’re not taking any chances with you.”
“Or my millions-of-dollars-legs?” I quipped sarcastically.
“It’s your brain we’re mostly worried about, smart ass,” he retorted with a grin. “At least your sense of humor didn’t get knocked out of you.”
“Yeah, yeah. I got it. Overnight stay. Look at my scans. You want me to hydrate, answer questions about current events, and prove I didn’t get a screw loosened on that field. Been here, done this.” I gave a thumbs-up, cringing as pain shot down my side.
“You got it. We’ll give you guys a few minutes,” Doc Overton said softly, his gaze darting to Teagan. “After that, you’re up for a full course of poking and prodding.”
“Noted.”
The docs and nurses cleared out, leaving me alone with Teagan. Luckily, they’d lowered the lights a little on the way out, easing the throbbing in my head.
“I’m so sorry!” Teagan sobbed, her shoulders hunching inward.
“What?” I let loose a laugh. She’d had the same exact reaction when I’d taken a hit our freshman year in high school, swearing she’d distracted me by calling my name too loudly, and claiming it was her fault. “T, baby. Come here.”
I gritted my teeth and forced my body over, using the power in my legs and narrowly avoiding the bedrail against my left side. Then I pulled on her hand, tugging her into my arms.
She reluctantly climbed into bed, curling against my good side, and nestling her head on my shoulder. “He hit you so hard,” she said so quietly I barely heard her.
“It happens.” I pressed a kiss to her forehead and breathed in her scent. “This isn’t your fault, you know.”
She sucked in a shaky breath.
“Teagan. This is hardly the worst hit I’ve taken, and having you here, tucked up against me in my jersey, wearing my ring—trust me, you’re the best painkiller there is.” I stroked her hair back from her forehead.
“I love you.” It sounded more like a plea than a declaration.
“And I love you.” I kissed her head again. “Baby, I’m okay. I hate to break it to you, but this isn’t the last time you’re going to see me like this,” I chuckled softly, hoping it would break a little of the tension locking her muscles up.
“That’s what I’m afraid of,” she whispered as two short knocks sounded at the door.
Coach Goodman didn’t wait for the okay, he simply barged in, worry lining his eyes. “They said you were awake, but I wanted to see for myself.”
“I’m fine, Coach.” I locked my arm around Teagan’s side when she tried to move. She wasn’t going anywhere, not as shaken as she was.
“Good, because the boys are here, demanding to see you.” He stepped aside, allowing Nixon and Hendrix to storm in.
“Damn, are you okay?” Nixon asked, his forehead puckered as he folded his arms across his chest. The guy didn’t mess around with concussions. His little brother had never woken up from one.
“I’m fine, I swear,” I promised him.
His jaw ticked in response.
Teagan eased out of my arms. Damn it, I wasn’t about to manhandle her into staying. She’d had enough of that.
Hendrix’s gaze darted between Nixon and me, well aware of Nixon’s past. “You should see the playback. Guy came at you like a fucking wrecking ball. How awesome is the bruising on your ribs?”
Leave it to Hendrix to change the subject. He reached for my gown, and Nixon slapped his hand. “Hey, don’t you know it’s not polite to undress a man without his permission?”
“It’s nothing we haven’t seen. It’s not like he’s shy around the locker room or needs his own shower for…privacy.” Hendrix lifted his eyebrows.
I laughed, and fuck me it hurt.
Teagan slipped off the bed. “I’m going to round up some Jello…or something.” She forced a smile and pretty much ran.
“She freaked, man,” Hendrix said softly. “At the stadium, when they carried you off, she freaked.”
“She’s always worried when shit like this has happened before.” I shrugged it off and reached for the water on the side table. “We’ve just never been together when it happened.”
“She sure as fuck didn’t scream at the docs to let her in the ambulance when Baker got hit against Dallas,” Nixon argued. “You should have seen Overton’s face. When she told him you were hers.”
“Well, she loves me more than she loved Baker, I guess.” That brought a tiny grin of possession to my face. Did I want Teagan to worry? Of course not. Did I like that she fought to get to my side? Hell yes.
Hendrix scoffed, and Nixon shook his head.
“Seriously though, you gotta see this hit.” Hendrix whipped out his phone and brought up the clip.
We all simultaneously hissed as we watched the replay.
“Oh, and I should tell you that your Mom is on her way,” Nixon warned.
“Fuck me,” I groaned.
If the docs thought Teagan was possessive, I couldn’t wait for them to get a load of my mother.
* * *
“It’s New Year’s Eve, and there’s zero chance I’m going to be anywhere but here,” Teagan argued, settling in at my side the next night.
She’d brought me home from the hospital since I wasn’t allowed to drive.
I also wasn’t supposed to use my phone, read, or do anything that generally used my brain. The doc had suggested crafts. I’d laughed him out of the room.
“Thank you for taking care of Walt for me.” The big baby was currently curled up on his dog bed across the room.
“You never have to thank me.” She rested her head on the stretch of bare skin between my collarbone and where the wrapping for my ribs began. “I’m so sorry this happened to you.”
“T, you know this is the shit that just happens. I have seven years left in the NFL—if I’m lucky—and I bet we’ll be here a couple more times. That doesn’t mean that I won’t be careful, but I don’t want you to worry too much.”
“I’m always going to worry.” She looked up at me with eyes so sad that my heart dropped.
“And I’m always going to come home to you. My home. Your home. Whichever home you want.” I cupped her face, and she rose, careful to keep her weight off me.
“You know I want to spend the rest of my life with you, right?” She asked, running her fingers through my hair.
“Well, you’re wearing my ring, so the secret is out on that one.” I flashed her a grin, wishing I wasn’t nearly immobile on my left side. I wanted to flip her over, pin her down, and fuck her hard enough to prove that I was fine—that I was healthy, and her worries were unfounded.
But there was something in her eyes that told me she wouldn’t be easily swayed from the path her mind had taken. My girl was deep in the pits of a worry I couldn’t rectify tonight. I could only soothe her as much as she was willing to be soothed.
“We can’t even watch the ball
drop,” I whined with a wrinkled nose. “What kind of New Years Eve is this?”
She arched a brow, easily spotting my sarcasm. “No television. But you know what the Doc said you could do?” A slight smile tilted her lips.
“Fuck you senseless?” I reached for her hips, wincing as my side pulled.
“Nope!” She slid away. “Take a bath.”
“Lame.” My gaze slid down her body, letting her see just how hungry I was for her.
“With me,” she amended.
“I’m in.”
She laughed softly, sliding off my bed and disappearing into the bathroom. Within a few seconds, I heard the water running.
She came back out wearing only the robe she’d left here.
My mouth went dry.
“Roman, the only way I’m getting in that tub with you is if you agree to keep your hands to yourself. No funny business. I mean it. You’re hurt.”
I got to my feet, carefully masking my wince. “Woman, I’d have to be dead not to want you.”
Her smile faded, and she swallowed. “Well, you agree to taking it easy, or I’m not getting in.” She folded her arms under her breasts, only making them swell above her neckline.
I groaned out my frustration. “Fine. You win. Any naked time with you is better than no naked time with you.”
Her phone chimed, and she smiled, but it was tinged with an unhappiness that I couldn’t pin my finger on. “It’s midnight.”
I crossed the distance between us and cupped her face in my hands. “Happy New Year,” I whispered against her lips, kissing her long and soft, and deep.
She returned my kiss like she always did, eager and wanting, but she held back when it came to leaning against me. “Happy New Year, Roman. I love you.”
“I love you,” I swore, my heart slipping slightly at her worried tone.
She led me to the bathtub, but no matter how long we soaked, I couldn’t wash away her tension or her worry. That was okay. I’d waited over twenty years for the chance to love Teagan. I wasn’t afraid of doing a little work to ease her fears.
Roman: A Raleigh Raptor Novel Page 18