by Jane Henry
“First of all, calm down,” he says, which does literally nothing to calm me down. “Second of all, listen.”
“Why do you think I came over here? Of course I’m listening.”
His eyes narrow on me before he leans in and growls in my ear. “I’ve got half a mind to toss you over my knee right here in the garden to make you hear reason. You’re infuriating sometimes, you know that?”
“Takes one to know one,” I mutter. “You’re no walk in the park, Nolan McCarthy!”
“Impossible woman!” Baby Sam clings to me, and Nolan looks instantly remorseful.
He inhales, then exhales slowly before he speaks. “We won’t lie in wait for the O’Gregors anymore. We want to bring them out of hiding, fight them head on.”
I frown, but nod. What does this have to do with us leaving?
“They won’t come here on our property. We’re too heavily guarded here, and they know they don’t stand a chance. They will, however, attack if they think we’re vulnerable.”
I really should listen more before I jump to conclusions, but sometimes I can’t help the way I react. It’s self-defense, really.
“I’ll go with you,” he says.
“Do we have to go back to that home, though, Nolan? It damn near gives me anxiety attacks being back there, I hate it so.”
“We do, but you won’t be alone. I’ll be with you. Carson found a nearby home that’s unoccupied, only a few doors down. My brothers will be there, prepared to help us. We just have to be discreet about it and it shouldn’t take long. We’ve planted the news that you’ll be coming back. We don’t want them knowing we’re lying in wait.”
I think over this plan. “We won’t draw them out as easily if we were at my place, then?”
He shakes his head. “No.”
He steps a little closer to me and places his hand on my arm. His touch is warm and reassuring. “You can do this, Sheena. And after this… after we’ve ended this threat to my family and yours… you and I will talk about the next step we take together.”
Reluctant hope blooms in my heart as I listen to what he has to say. But I’ve been through too much to really believe there are happily-ever-afters for a girl like me. So I don’t think of it. I only nod. “Okay, then. Let’s do it. But Fiona and Tiernan are old enough to know why we’re doing this.”
“Aye,” he says. “But so help me, Sheena, I’m not going to fight you every step of the way and drag you along with me.”
Sam starts to fuss a little, so I sway with him on my hip. “Shhh,” I whisper to him, while I nod to Nolan. “I know it. You’re like your brothers. Remember, my job is to observe details, isn’t it?”
He gives me a crooked grin that melts my heart. “Aye.”
“And I’m well aware that you won’t fight me. You’d just as soon manhandle me into submission.”
He shrugs.
I clear my throat and gather up my courage. “But that won’t be necessary.”
He gives me a wary look. “Right.” He doesn’t believe me.
“What?”
“You want me to believe that you won’t fight me, then?”
“Well…” my voice trails off because I’m not exactly sure how to tell him the truth. Can I? “I’ll try my best,” I finally say. There must be something about my expression that amuses him, for he laughs out loud and shakes his head.
“Let’s take this one step at a time, then. First, we move them to your mother’s home. We get things set up. Then we take step two. No step two until step one is complete. Listen, Sheena. We need to draw the O’Gregors out. The plan is for us to set up in the family home in Stone City, but once we’ve sorted everything with the O’Gregors, we’ll move them to your place, or…” his voice trails off and he works his jaw.
“Or what?”
His eyes come back to mine. “Or, we find a place together.”
“We?” I ask. “We who?”
“All of us,” he says. “You, Tiernan, Fiona, Sam. And me.”
He isn’t saying this. Is he? But I mask the hope that rises in me, because I’m afraid if I move too quickly, this dream will vanish.
“What about my mother?” I ask
He hesitates before he responds. “I don’t think she’ll prove a threat.”
I breathe out in relief. “Right, then. Aye. I can do this, yes.”
“Good,” he says, reaching for baby Sam. Sam leans over and lets Nolan take him, then nestles against his hip. I wonder if taking the baby is a power move, because my body responds of its own accord whenever he’s got the baby. I can’t help but swoon a little. I can’t think of any of this now, because Fiona’s gone off to find Tiernan and both of them are approaching us now.
We’ve got to sort this out.
But move back to the family home?
The very thought makes me nauseous.
Chapter 17
Nolan
I expected Sheena to fight me. I had a plan in place, and was prepared for her to balk, to resist going back to the childhood home she despises.
But I never expected mam to put up such a fuss.
“I don’t know about this, Nolan,” she says, following us into the house when we go to pack their things. She’s heard the plan from someone, and now she’s following after me and Sheena on a mission.
“It’s the only way,” I tell her, not meeting her eyes. Keenan’s just coming out of the office when he sees us enter. He looks from her to me and watches in silence.
“The only way?” she says. Her eyes flash at me, and she throws her hands up in the air. “The only way?” Her voice cracks a little. She’s gone full on mama bear. “The problem is, it isn’t safe for them there. You know it isn’t.”
I sigh. “I’ll be with them,” I say. “They won’t be alone.”
“Doesn’t matter,” she protests. “You against those ruthless men? I know how they are. Don’t forget, I grew up among the likes of those men. I know what they’re capable of.”
I try to be patient, but I don’t have time for this. “I know that. But listen, we have our reasons for what we have to do.”
“You always do,” she says, her voice shaking. “Every decision we make comes down to this, doesn’t it?”
“Down to what?” I ask with a sigh. Keenan watches me from the door but still says nothing.
“The good of The Clan,” she says. “Always. It doesn’t matter if it’s good for anyone else, does it?”
I think before I answer her. Her heart is the very life of our brotherhood, our home, our family. I have a job to do and I’m tempted to dismiss her protests, but I can’t do that, not when she’s given so much to all of us. So I take in a deep breath, then let it out slowly, to calm myself before I speak to her.
“Mam,” I say, as gently as I can. “Yes. It does, and you know it. It doesn’t mean that others have to suffer for our sakes. It does mean we have to make decisions that will solidify and strengthen the brotherhood. If The Clan is attacked, or weakened in any way, you know the devastation that brings to countless others.”
She scoffs, but I know her resolve is weakening when she turns away from me and won’t meet my eyes.
“He’s right, Maeve.” Sheena’s says. “I ought to know. I once thought, not so long ago, mind, that all of you McCarthys were as guilty as the others. And I won’t argue they’re the Robin Hoods of Ballyhock. But I do know that without the McCarthy Clan’s strength, the other Clans in Ireland may come to power. And we can’t have that.”
Mam sighs and looks away. She bites her lip, but nods. “I know it,” she finally says sadly. “But you don’t know what it’s like, Sheena. To see the ones you love put themselves in harm’s way, every damn day. ’Tis like seeing my sons go to war on the frontline with no hope of it coming to an end.”
Sheena nods with sympathy. “I can imagine. Knowing how it felt to walk away from my brothers and sister and leave them in the state I did.”
Lachlan steps forward from behind Keenan and clear
s his throat. “Now that we’ve had our little family chat about feelings and all, perhaps we can move on to more pressing things?” He scrubs a hand across his brow. “Haven’t been to the gym in a few days, and goddamn I’d love to kick some O’Gregor arse already.”
Mam shakes her head. “Impossible, the lot of you,” she says, heading for the stairs. She speaks over her shoulder to Sheena. “I’ll pack up baby Sam’s things and make sure he’s got his special blankie and toys.” She turns to Lachlan. “And you. Watch that mouth of yours in front of the baby.”
He looks suitably abashed. “Sorry ‘bout that.”
She trots up the stairs. When she’s gone, Keenan looks my way. “Nolan, a word before you go?”
“Aye.” I hand baby Sam to Sheena. “Go. Pack. We leave within the hour.” I kiss her cheek and lean in to whisper in her ear. “I love you.”
I walk to Keenan before she even has a chance to reply. He and Lachlan follow me into the office and shut the door behind them.
“Well done, Nolan,” Keenan says. “You know I’m not above admitting when I’m wrong.”
I nod. A good leader shows meekness, and Keenan demonstrates this well. “Aye?”
“I was wrong about your ability to be a strong leader in our Clan,” he says. “What you said out there… would’ve made dad proud.”
His praise warms me through, but I only nod. “Thanks, Keenan. You’d have made him proud as well.” And goddamn, but he would have.
“Let’s not get all gushy again,” Lachlan says with a grimace. “On to business before we start holding hands and singing fucking Kum Ba Yah by the campfire.”
I cuff him upside the head, and he looks relieved, but it’s fleeting when Keenan speaks. He leans against the edge of his desk when he addresses him.
“Tell him what you found today, Lach.”
Lachlan turns to face me, and his boyish face looks older. His brows draw together, and there are lines around his mouth he didn’t have before. Being an active member of The Clan ages you.
“Went to scout out the family home,” he says. “Carson and I went. Fixed the locks, installed a few more. Carson knows his way around there better. Would’ve gone with Cormac, but you can’t go anywhere discreetly with a guy like him.”
I can’t help but smile. Cormac’s enormous size makes it impossible for him not to be noticed.
“Aye.”
“Evidence of a struggle. Carson and I found a few locals, did some digging, asked some questions.” He pauses. “Found something that matters.”
The skin on the back of my neck prickles with awareness. I know what he’s about to tell me will hold weight, might even impact everything else we’re doing.
“The body of Aine Hurston.”
Mother of God.
“Haven’t told anyone else yet,” Keenan says. “We have a plan, and I don’t want to fuck that up. Not now. And it doesn’t impact much of what we have to do right now.”
What is he talking about? It impacts fucking everything.
Without her mother around, Sheena will have to do something about custody of her siblings, and if she means to me what I think she does…
“You alright, Nolan?”
“Aye,” I say, shaking my head. “You think the O’Gregors had anything to do with it, then?”
“No doubt,” Lachlan says. “She was into them for money for the drugs.”
I turn to Keenan. “You know what this means.”
He nods. “It means you’ll do whatever you have to. Whatever you decide, you’ve got the backing of the brotherhood.”
“Where does it end?” Lachlan asks. “If they want vengeance on us, and we draw them out of hiding… if we fight them, where does this end?”
“Doesn’t have to be an all-out brawl between us,” Keenan says. “Their gripe was because they think we took Tiernan. We ventured onto their territory, ruffled their feathers, but that’s more easily forgiven.”
“They killed his mother,” I say.
“Aye,” Keenan says. “And according to Clan code? That means he owes them nothing.”
“What do we owe them?”
Keenan clenches his jaw and looks out the window. “We didn’t harm them. We don’t owe them a tribute, we don’t even owe them money.”
“Of course not.”
“We draw them out,” I say to Keenan. “Make them meet us, and tell us what they demand. Then we’ll have counsel and decide if we can meet their demands.”
He thinks over what I’ve said, and nods. “Right. It’s the only way. Who’s going with you, Lachlan?”
“Carson, Tully.”
“And Cormac and the rest stay here in case the O’Gregors go momentarily insane and decide to attack us here at our house.”
I can’t help but chuckle. “They are the drug dealers around here. Could be high.”
“Good stuff they carry. Could lead them to believe they might actually defeat us.”
“Hallucinogens, then,” Keenan says with a smile.
We can’t help but joke about this, but we know the threat is very real.
I meet Sheena upstairs. She needs to know about her mother, but not now. Not when she’s already on edge about where we’re going and what we need to do. In silence, we prepare, packing only what’s necessary. Her hand trembles as she zips up a bag with clothes. A little bag sits by the door.
“What’s that?”
“Sam’s things,” she says in a little voice. I turn to her, but she turns away. I reach for her, but she deflects my hand. I don’t pursue her, not now. We have a job to do.
In short time, Tiernan, Fiona, and Sam are ready to go. We give Sheena a car, but I don’t join her, not yet.
“You go ahead,” I tell her. “It’s best if they think you’re alone.”
She nods, swallowing hard. A strange look crosses her face, but I don’t really understand it.
“Y’alright?” I ask.
She nods. “Aye,” she says, her voice hoarse.
“Wish you weren’t going alone?”
Her eyes fly to me. “Of course, Nolan,” she says. “Don’t you know?”
I shake my head. Goddamn, I don’t know anything for certain anymore.
Her eyes soften, and she reaches a hand out to me and squeezes.
“I don’t want to do this alone.” For some strange reason, her words hold a note of finality. “But I will. I have to.”
“Do what alone?” I ask.
She only shakes her head and walks away.
We’ll talk more about that later.
I track her on my phone and watch as the cars behind her leave. The plan is for me to follow behind in short time. I can’t follow too closely, or people in Stone City will get suspicious.
It kills me, though, to watch her drive away, to know that she’s taking herself and those children into a dangerous situation.
“Fuck it, give me the keys,” I tell the driver who stands next to me.
“Sir?”
“Give me the fucking keys,” I repeat.
He hands them to me, watching me warily, but my decision’s made. I sit in the driver’s side, slam the door and put the keys in the ignition. I drive toward them, but at a distance so no one notices. I took nothing with me, but all I need is right ahead of me, only two cars up.
The ride is slow and arduous, with my instinct to step on the gas and drive faster. But I let her go. Just ahead of me. Still, it feels weirdly symbolic. Am I getting sentimental in my old age? Everything feels symbolic and poignant.
Her goodbye kiss. The way she drives away from me. I can’t shake the feeling that something terrible’s going to happen.
But we pull up to her house, and I’m parked a good bit behind. I wait, while she takes the kids out of the car and heads inside. She shuts and locks the door behind her, and still I wait. I watch to be sure no one followed them, that they’re alone. I wait just until I see the son of a bitch she calls her ex lurking in the shadows.
I’m tempted to
get out and call to him, to draw the gun I’ve got tucked in the harness around my waist, and point it at his scrawny head. If I fucking knew he ever put his hands on Sheena before…
“You motherfucker,” I mutter to myself. “Didn’t wait long, did you?”
Didn’t think he would, though. We had a few locals spread the word they were returning. He’s been lying in wait.
I watch what he does. He isn’t alone. He nods to one man, then another. These fucking douchebags think they’re not so transparent but I can see right through them.
I tug a hat on my head and drape a jacket around me, all black so I blend in with the surroundings, when a text comes in from Lachlan.
We’re here. O’Gregors are about. Didn’t see us, we came in one by one. You see anything?
I text back.
Aye. Fucking douchebag ex hovering outside.
Lachlan: Don’t kill him. Not yet. You’ll fuck things up.
I mutter to myself but don’t reply just yet. It’s time for me to go in though.
I’m going in.
I open the car door when I feel someone behind me and cool metal pushed up to my neck. “Make a fucking sound, I kill you.”
Chapter 18
Sheena
I despise being back here. The trash bin’s overflowing, the sink still filled with dirty dishes, and it smells like garbage and weed. I hate that Nolan’s plan involves us being here, but I know he has reasons. We can’t lie in hiding from the O’Gregors any longer. It’s time we draw them out, make it clear where our loyalties lie.
I hate that my family’s been dragged through this. I feel responsible, somehow, even though their very presence in Stone City puts them in contact with the O’Gregors. Reason doesn’t matter at times like these, though. My instinct to gather my family to me and run is stronger than ever.
“I hate it here,” Fiona says, echoing my own thoughts. “Why are we back? I don’t understand why the McCarthys kicked us out like that.”
“Right,” Tiernan says, shaking his head. “I actually thought for a while they were friends of ours. Bloody hell.”