“I’ll help you with their baths,” Timothy said, laughing.
“You’ll need one yerself.”
Ruby looked at the puzzle and then at the window again. Maybe she should check for a phone message, just in case. He did have that cell phone the school board gave him. But when she slipped outside to the shanty and dialed up voice mail, she heard nothing. Christian definitely wasn’t coming. She should have known better than to agree to go with him in the first place. Back in the house, she tried to concentrate on the puzzle again, but it was hard to focus. He had a lot of nerve standing her up like this. It wasn’t a date, but they did have plans. He could have at least called.
She grimaced. He was getting a piece of her mind tomorrow at church, that was for sure.
The next morning Ruby wasn’t as upset, but she was still annoyed. She had also decided not to bother scolding Christian. Instead she would ignore him. She’d learned her lesson not to trust him anymore. Whatever friendship or relationship they had, it was over.
She helped Patience get the boys ready for church, and soon they were on their way. When they arrived at Abigail and Asa Bontrager’s, Ruby kept her focus on the barn where they were holding the service. Of course, she said hi to people as they were passing by, but she didn’t look for Christian.
Ruby sat down on the bench beside Patience, the boys between them. Tobias leaned his head against Ruby’s arm. She patted his knee and waited for the service to begin.
By the time church was over, she was feeling better. She enjoyed the singing, and the sermon was a reminder of what was important—keeping her focus on God. She hadn’t been doing that lately. In fact, her focus had been on herself, mostly. And Christian, of course. But not on her faith. I’m sorry, Lord.
They were staying for the meal afterward, and Ruby offered to help put out the food. “Danki, Ruby, but we’ve got plenty of help,” Abigail said.
Ruby looked at the women in the packed kitchen and nodded. She’d probably spill something anyway. She went outside and walked over to the other side of the barn, on the opposite side of where the men talked and the children played. She leaned against the rough slats and sighed, crossing her arms over her chest, disappointment washing over her. Even though she was mad at him, she was disappointed she hadn’t seen Christian in church. He might have been sitting out of her sight line. Or maybe he decided not to come today, although that would have been surprising. She couldn’t imagine him skipping a service.
She needed to stop thinking about him so much. That was her biggest problem. He was taking up too much of her mental energy, which she needed to turn to God. She needed to start following his will, not her own. “That starts now,” she whispered, looking up at the cloud-filled sky. “Yer will be done, no matter what.”
After a few moments of silent prayer, she turned to go back to the house. Surely lunch had started by now. As she turned the corner of the barn, she struck something solid, and she felt the feeling of deja vu. Christian. She took a step back from him and frowned. They had to stop meeting like this. Also, she remembered she was supposed to be ignoring him. “Excuse me,” she said, not looking at him as she started to move past him.
But he grabbed her by the shoulders, stopping her. “Thank God I found you!”
She looked up at him, this time paying more attention, and she was shocked at what she saw. His eyes were wild. He wasn’t wearing a hat. He wasn’t even wearing church clothes, and it looked like he’d slept in the clothing he was in. His face was unshaven too. She’d never seen him so unkempt before. Or so panicked. “What’s wrong?” she asked, touching his forearm.
“It’s Selah. She’s gone.”
Christian had never felt more panicked and out of control. Ever since he’d discovered Selah was gone, even his pulse had been out of control. But now, seeing Ruby, it slowed slightly. He hadn’t known what to do, except to seek her out. “I don’t know where she is,” he said, his voice breaking.
Without a word she took his hand and they went behind the barn. She held on to him as she asked in a calm voice, “What happened?”
“I spent yesterday in Barton,” he said, spilling everything out in Dietsch. “I had errands to run. When I came back in the afternoon, I was getting ready to come pick you up . . . I’m sorry about that, by the way.”
“Don’t worry about it.”
“I went upstairs to tell Selah I was leaving. The door to her room was partway open, and since that was unusual, I went inside. Everything was gone. Her clothes, her books, a little rag doll she’s had since she was a child and brought with her from New York. There was no note, nothing to let me know when she’d left or where she’d gone. I didn’t panic at first. I figured she went back to New York. She’d been so unhappy here, even worse the past week. For a while I thought she was doing better.”
He shook his head. For a few days after the pie debacle, Selah had kept her word about trying to do better. She cooked, cleaned, and made conversation. Then she lost her temper when he asked her why they were having green beans with meat loaf—they’d always had peas with that particular entrée—and she was back to giving him the silent treatment. That had been agreeable to him, since he was consumed with thinking about Ruby. What a mess he’d made of that. He’d been wanting to talk to her, to try to sort things out. He missed her—their lessons, their conversations, the way he could be himself around her. But he’d also hurt her, and he had to make amends. When Martha suggested they go have ice cream, he jumped at the chance, and he was pleased Ruby had agreed to go. He thought they might be on the right track.
Then Selah disappeared.
“What happened after that?” Ruby asked.
Her question brought his thoughts back into focus. “I called Mamm, and she said she hadn’t heard from Selah in a couple of weeks. I didn’t want to worry mei parents, so I made up some excuse for being concerned and told them she was probably just out with friends.” He ran his hand through his hair. “I don’t even remember what I told them exactly.”
“And then what?”
“I went looking for her. I spent most of the night trying to find her without bothering anybody. I still wasn’t one hundred percent sure something was wrong. But I felt that it was in mei gut.”
“So you came here.”
He nodded. “I didn’t know what else to do. I still don’t. I had just pulled up in mei buggy when I saw you by the barn.” Without thinking, he squeezed her hand, the guilt he kept at bay rising within him. He’d left Selah to her own devices when he knew something was wrong with her. This was his fault. He should have done something—
“It will be okay, Christian.” Ruby moved closer to him. “Remember, Selah’s an adult.”
“She’s mei little schwester,” he choked out.
“But she’s also an adult. I’m sure she’ll contact you soon.”
“What if she doesn’t?”
“Christian, she hasn’t been gone that long. Maybe she went to visit another friend in a different district or town. That’s why she took all her things with her.”
“Then why wouldn’t she tell me that?”
Ruby didn’t respond. Finally, she said, “I’ll sit with you until you hear from her. I’ll let Timothy know I’m leaving.”
He almost collapsed with relief. For once, he didn’t want to be alone, his thoughts churning with blame and culpability.
“Wait in yer buggy,” she said, her voice calm and soothing. “I’ll be right back.”
Christian climbed inside the buggy to wait for her. People were busy at the tables, set up outside since it wasn’t too cold yet. Fortunately, it seemed no one had noticed him. He rubbed his hand over his face, feeling the stubble on his chin. He knew he looked like a mess. For once, he didn’t care.
Ruby climbed into the buggy. “Let’s geh.”
They had just left the Bontragers’ when Ruby asked, “Do you want to drive around again and look for her?”
“I don’t know where I’d look.”
<
br /> “Did you talk to Martha?”
He nodded. “I stopped by last night. When I asked her if Selah was there, she said no. She also said she hadn’t seen her in a few weeks. Like I did with mei parents, I minimized mei explanation to her. I didn’t want to upset Martha.”
“That was kind of you,” Ruby said.
He was barely paying attention to the road. Fortunately, his horse knew the way home.
“You don’t have any idea where she would have gone?” she asked.
“Nee.” He gripped the reins. “She doesn’t confide in me.” And I haven’t been paying enough attention to her.
They were quiet the rest of the way back to his house. Even though they weren’t talking, he still took comfort from Ruby’s presence. When they arrived and got out of the buggy, she said, “I’ll make some lunch.”
He nodded his thanks and put up the horse and buggy. When he went inside, she had already put a sandwich and a handful of pretzels on a plate and set it on the table. “When was the last time you ate something?”
Christian sat down. “Lunch yesterday. I think.” He wasn’t hungry, but he logically knew he had to eat something. He took a bite of the sandwich. Turkey and cheese.
She set a glass of tea and an apple in front of him and sat down next to him.
“Aren’t you going to eat?” he asked.
“Later.”
He took the sandwich and tore it in half. Messy, but it would do. He handed her half. “Here. Eat this.”
“It’s yers—”
“Eat.”
She took the sandwich and took a tiny bite. Christian could see the worry in her eyes, too, even though she was trying to hide it. Surprising, since she and Selah weren’t exactly friends.
“Did you check Selah’s room again?” Ruby asked after she finished the sandwich. “Maybe she left some kind of clue about where she went.”
“I did. There was nothing there. She took everything with her.”
Ruby frowned. “I don’t think there’s much we can do, other than wait. At least not right now. If she doesn’t come back by tomorrow, you’ll probably have to let Freemont know so he can get some of the men to help find her.”
He nodded, also recognizing what she’d left unsaid—they may have to get the police involved. It was bad enough he’d brought Ruby into it. This was his business. His family. He should be able to handle this alone. But he couldn’t.
Ruby took his hand. “Let’s pray for her, Christian,” she said softly.
He closed his eyes and prayed harder than he had for anything in his life.
CHAPTER 16
Ruby looked at Christian as he slept on the couch, his breathing steady and deep. She let out a soft sigh, glad he was finally able to catch a nap. She’d been here with him for the past four hours, trying to keep his mind off Selah. They attempted to play cards, but neither of them could focus. Then they went for a short walk, but Christian didn’t want to go far in case Selah came back. He’d tried to read, but he couldn’t. And that’s when Ruby knew something was wrong.
At first, she didn’t understand why he was so upset. Yes, Selah had packed up everything and hadn’t left a note. She’d been inconsiderate. But she wasn’t a little kid. Christian was acting like she had disappeared off the face of the earth. Ruby was fairly sure he would get a phone call from his parents at any time, telling him Selah was there. Or from one of her friends.
Ruby got up and pulled the quilt off the back of the couch and covered him with it. He stirred slightly and then stilled. She couldn’t help but crouch next to him. A hank of his hair had fallen over his forehead, and she was tempted to brush it back. But she didn’t dare wake him. He was exhausted from lack of sleep and worry. Her heart was moved by the way he cared about his sister. She hadn’t realized his feelings could run so deep. At times he didn’t seem to have feelings at all. But he did. And that caused a spark of attraction to light up within her.
Her cheeks grew hot and she rose. Oh, this wasn’t good. And what kind of person was she, thinking about Christian that way at a time like this? Or at all?
She went into the kitchen and got a glass of water. Although she told herself not to think of him, she couldn’t stop, especially the memory of their kiss. She still didn’t know why he’d kissed her. It didn’t make any sense. You only kissed people you liked. People you loved. And while Christian obviously cared deeply for his sister, he didn’t care for Ruby except as a friend to seek out when trouble came. Sometimes she wasn’t sure he even liked her very much.
“Why did you let me fall asleep?”
She whirled around, water sloshing out of the glass. She set it down on the counter before she did any damage and put her hands behind her back. “You were tired. You are tired.” There were shadows beneath his bleary eyes.
“Doesn’t mean I should have slept.” He dragged himself to the table and sat down. Then he looked at her. “I’ll take you home.”
He didn’t look like he should be alone. “I can stay here.”
“No.” He straightened his posture, looking a bit like the usual Christian. “I have taken up enough of your time,” he added in English.
“You haven’t, and there’s nee need to be so formal. I thought we were—are—friends.”
He paused. “We are.”
She walked over to him and sat down. “This is what friends do. They’re here for each other. They care about each other.”
His gaze met hers, and she saw something in them that made her heart warm. Danki for being mei friend, Ruby.”
“You’re welcome,” she said, smiling. Maybe he did like her, at least a little more than she’d thought.
A knock sounded, and Christian jumped up from the chair. They both went to the living room and opened the front door. Martha’s father stood there. “Chris,” he said, and then gave Ruby a nod. “Martha sent me.”
“She did?”
The man nodded. “She wanted me to tell you in person instead of calling. Selah is at our haus.”
Christian tried not to pace while he waited in Martha’s living room.
Ruby had insisted she’d walk home. He wanted to say so many things to her, but wanting to see Selah right away, without saying a word he got into his buggy and followed Martha’s father.
Now he was waiting to see if his sister would come downstairs. Martha’s mother was in the kitchen, kindly staying out of the way. Martha’s father came down the stairs. “I let mei dochder know you’re here,” he said. Then he left the room.
Why was Selah doing this? Not only had she worried him sick, but she had brought Martha’s whole family into their private business. Much like he had brought in Ruby. But that was different, wasn’t it?
At the sound of footsteps on the stairs, he looked up. Martha met his gaze as she came down. “Hi, Chris,” she said, her tone kind.
“Is she coming?”
Martha shook her head. “She says nee, but I think she wants to see you.”
“Is she okay?”
“I’m not sure. She’s not saying much about what happened.”
That sent another wave of panic through him, but he held his ground. He had to approach this carefully or he’d lose Selah for good.
“Why don’t you geh upstairs?” Martha said. “The worst thing she can do is tell you to leave. My room is the second on the right.”
He would leave, if Selah asked. He nodded and went upstairs. He paused at Martha’s door. What should he say to his sister? He was angry, but worry was overriding that emotion. He closed his eyes and said a short prayer for wisdom before walking inside.
Selah was sitting on the bed, but her back was to him. Her shoulders were slumped, and he thought he heard a quiet sniffle. He also noticed she was wearing English clothes. He wondered about that, but he didn’t dare ask for an explanation right now. “Selah?”
“I told Martha I didn’t want to see you.” She didn’t turn around, and her voice was thick, as if she had just swallowed a spoonful of
peanut butter.
“I know. But I’m here anyway.” When she didn’t respond he moved closer, hesitating when he reached the bed, but then he went around it and sat down next to her. He didn’t say anything for a long while, sensing that his words right now would make the situation worse.
“I’m sorry,” she finally said in a hoarse whisper.
“Apology accepted.”
She turned toward him, her eyes red-rimmed, a wadded-up tissue in her hand. “That’s it?”
He held out his hands. “What else should I say?”
“You could yell at me, for starters.”
“Why would I do that? It wouldn’t change what happened.”
“It’s what I deserve!” She jumped up from the bed and faced him. “Don’t you ever feel anything, Christian? Were you even worried about me when I was gone?”
You have no idea. “Of course I was.”
“Then why aren’t you angry? Why aren’t you dragging me back home?” Tears streamed down her cheeks. “Why are you being so calm? So nice?”
His heart seemed to constrict. It was hard to see her this way, crying, looking like she hadn’t slept any more than he had. “You don’t need me to yell at you,” he said, keeping his voice even.
“Ya, I do! I need . . . I need . . .” She started to sob.
Christian was at a loss. How could he help her? Comfort her? He rose from the bed and went to her. Her face was in her hands as she cried. He lifted his arms, paused, and then put them around her shoulders. “It’s okay,” he whispered, patting her back. “Whatever it is, it’s okay.”
She leaned against him and sobbed against his shirt. He didn’t move, determined to hold her as long as she needed him to. Finally, she lifted her head and looked at him. He reached over and pulled a tissue out of the box on a nightstand. “Here.”
She grabbed it and blew her nose. “I got yer shirt wet.”
He looked down at the damp spot just below his right shoulder. Then he shrugged. “This shirt isn’t exactly clean, anyway.”
The Teacher's Bride Page 21