“And if you ever want to come back into town for a night or two, you can.” I’d said it without really thinking it through—figuring out the logistics of hiding her from the twins would make my head ache.
“I’ll be fine up here. It’s like the fancy version of camping.”
We walked back out the front door and across the yard. “Asa’s bringing a generator up while he works on his side of the property over there. So if we ever lose power—which is unlikely going into the summer season—we’ll have a backup if need be. There might be a lot activity over the next couple months as he gets electricians and his architect out here, but that’ll settle come fall.”
“How’s Asa doing?” Violet stretched, bringing the bottom hem of her sweater up to reveal a few inches of her skin—the only skin on her body without bruises.
“Good.” Keane said it automatically, but I knew it wasn’t wholly truthful. It was too much to dig into, and really unnecessary anyway. “I’ll probably be up here most days, but my mom might miss me, so I’ll be in town at least for Sundays.” He glanced at me when he said that, and I knew he was referring to our standing Sunday dates.
“Don’t you have a job?”
“It’s seasonal. Come harvest time, I’ll be busy again. That’s why we decided to start renovating this summer. Like I said, it won’t always be so quiet. And when the kids get off of school for summer, there will be a hundred kids out on this lake.”
“That’s fine.” She made her way toward the rickety dock.
“Be careful,” I said automatically and then regretted the words instantly when Violet turned around and looked at me.
“I’m not a little kid, Navy.”
“I know.”
“Do you?” She crossed her arms over her chest. “You’re treating me like I’m fragile. Plenty of women have been pregnant and haven’t fallen apart. Our mom did, three times. I’m a big girl now. Keane even said so.” She flashed a teasing smile at him. “I don’t need either of you to babysit me. I’m okay being alone. And, besides, I’m not really alone.”
“Sorry.” I rubbed the toe of my shoe over a rock that was slightly protruding from the ground. “I just don’t really know what to do. I don’t know what you need.”
“I’ve got everything I need.”
“For now,” I hedged. “Eventually—”
“Eventually isn’t now. I don’t want to worry about what’s got to happen eventually. I have you,” she said gesturing toward me. “And I’ve got this place, thanks to Keane. I just want to get through the summer and figure things out.”
I couldn’t disagree with having her basic needs—family and shelter—met. But she didn’t have an income or money to spare. Which meant I would need to cover for her, at least until she had made those decisions. With my aunt being gone, I would definitely get plenty of hours to cover whatever other needs Violet had. But after? “Okay,” I said, wanting to avoid an argument. We’d get it figured out. If I held onto that belief—even short-sighted as it was—we’d be okay.
“Perfect. Let’s unpack then.”
“You sure you’re okay staying out here tonight?”
“Yep,” Violet said, trudging off toward the car. Keane and I turned and walked after her at a slower pace.
“She seems in better spirits than I expected.”
“Me too,” I said, looking after her. “I can’t tell if she’s putting on a front or she’s falling back into her old self. She’s good about hiding how she feels.”
“She’s definitely better at that than you.” He nudged me with his shoulder. “This is what’s been eating you up the last few days, huh?”
“Yeah. When you found me at Debbie’s—”
“—eating that sad, cold slice of pizza.”
I nodded. “I’d just bought her bus ticket here. I didn’t know what to expect, but this certainly wasn’t it.”
Keane put a hand on my shoulder, pausing our steps. “I’ll make sure she’s safe. I’m going to buy new locks for the place and install them tonight. I don’t think anyone had a key to the place other than me and Asa, and my parents, of course. But just in case. And I’ll be here most days.”
I rubbed my arms as I studied the area around the lake. It was serene. There were no threats that I could see. It was a little ridiculous of me to be nervous about Violet being alone in a cabin forty-five minutes from me when she’d been states away in a city with a significantly higher crime rate than this town of a thousand people. “I know. She’ll be alone out here. Maybe that’s what she needs. Being home with me or the twins hovering likely would make her want to murder us all.”
“Trust that she knows what she needs.” We both turned our heads, taking in Violet as she opened the back of Keane’s truck. “I know she’s only twenty, but she did a lot of growing up when she was in California. She had no choice. And she’s gonna be a mom.”
I blew out a breath. “That’s still hard for me to fathom.”
“Well, fathom it.”
I laughed. Keane always had that way about him, breaking my nerves just when I was fraught with stress. “Okay. I’ll fathom it.”
“Look at her,” Keane said. “She still holds her head high. The important thing is that she came home, that she didn’t stay. You know that.”
“I do.”
“She’s strong. Like you. Queens, the two of you.”
I rolled my eyes at his comment. “If we’re queens, what does that make Jade and Rose?”
“Oh, easy. They’re jesters. They just don’t know they provide entertainment.”
“Jade might spit in your food if you tell her that.”
“Oh, I know.”
I opened my mouth to speak but was interrupted.
“You guys gonna help me?” Violet hollered at us.
Keane bowed. “Yes, my queen,” he said with a wink at me.
“Go.” Violet practically pushed me out of the cabin. The bed was decked out with the new bedding and the fridge was half-full of stuff I’d brought and what Keane had left there.
“I’ll pick up some paint swatches and be up tomorrow, before my shift.”
“I know.” She practically sounded impatient with me. Not that I could blame her. “Just go. Get some sleep. You get the big bed all to yourself tonight.”
“I’ll be up with dinner later,” Keane said, wrapping an arm around me as he led me out of the cabin. “I’ll bring some DVDs too, until we get the internet hooked up. What’s your flavor?”
“Something not dumb.”
“Ah,” he said with an exaggerated raise of his eyebrows. “You know my tastes too well.”
“I still remember the movie you subjected Navy to years ago. Where tomatoes were the killers. So nothing like that.”
“Question,” Keane said, a finger tapping his chin. “How do you feel about killer turkeys?”
Violet set her mouth in a line.
“That’s a no. Got it.”
“If anyone needs a babysitter, it’s him,” Violet said to me, wagging her fingers at Keane. “Make sure he doesn’t bring something horrible.”
“I will.”
“Good.” She looped an arm around me, so I was sandwiched between them both. “Thanks, guys.” She popped a quick kiss to my cheek. “See you around dinner,” she told Keane.
He saluted her and walked me to the truck.
Once we were on the road and I’d finally turned my head forward instead of staring back at the cabin, Keane leaned over to pat me on the leg. “She’s not wrong, you know. You look wiped out, babe.”
Keane had called me babe throughout our friendship. It was our thing. And maybe it was because I was exhausted, but for some reason it didn’t sound the same as it always had. Maybe it was because being told I looked tired wasn’t exactly a compliment, but my response was undeservedly short. “I am tired. I’m worried. I don’t know how I’m going to sleep tonight.”
“With the volume level of Jade’s music, I don’t blame ya. I’m surpris
ed your aunt doesn’t rip the power to her stereo out of the wall.”
“You know what I’m referring to.” As if to illustrate my point, I pointed back to the way we’d come with my thumb. “I’m glad you’ll be up here, at least.”
“I will. She’ll be okay. In some way, maybe her leaving was good for you both.”
I gave him a skeptical look.
“She would’ve become wholly dependent upon you. I love your sisters, but you’re always there for them, for everything. Which is awesome, but it doesn’t allow them the room to grow up and learn to fix their own mistakes.”
“That’s not totally true. They get lots of life lessons from their mistakes.”
“But you solve their problems before they can. I know you want to protect them, but you can’t do it all the time. The Adorables are growing up and making mistakes on their own. It’s okay if they fall and scrape their knees in the process.”
“It’s hard for me,” I told him. “You know that.”
He nodded, turning back down on the highway. “I do. But I know that you love being needed, Navy. And that’s not a bad thing, but if you place your self-worth at the feet of people who don’t realize they need you, you’re only going to break your own heart. And I get it—Violet, the twins, they’ve always looked up to you. You’ve caught them every time they’ve fallen.”
When I was quiet, Keane continued, more quietly as if it would make the words land softer. “Unfortunately, Violet fell pretty hard by herself. And now she’s here. You’re helping pick her back up, but you can’t be her crutch. She’s gonna have to do a lot of this on her own and—” he raised his voice and held up a hand, pausing me before I was about to interrupt, “—you’re gonna have to let her. It’s like kicking a baby bird out of its nest and forcing it to fly. But she’s tucking and rolling out herself.”
“That gives me morbid thoughts of all the dead baby birds we’d find in your yard growing up.”
“Remember when I tried to resuscitate one of them?”
I grimaced. “How could I forget your mom’s screeching?”
He laughed. “IT HAS DISEASES, KEANE! YOUR FINGERS ARE GONNA FALL OFF! WHAT ARE YOU DOINNNNG?” I guessed living with her had given him the advantage of perfectly replicating her voice.
My eyelids were heavy, and the change of topic was better for my brain to handle, anyway. “How’s your mom going to do when you’re at the cabin more often?”
“I’m a baby bird,” he said with a shrug. “I’m tucking and rolling out of her nest. But so is Asa. And he has been for a while. He’s not the same…” his voice trailed off.
“Yeah.” I covered his hand with mine and gave a reassuring squeeze. “But your mom makes the best snacks, so I’m sure you’ll be back often.”
“I think it’s really hard on her,” he said in a moment of total honesty. “I mean, Asa coming back, changed the way he was, was hard too. But he’s still her boy, you know? Her oldest boy. He’s different, but he still inhabits the body that she grew, fed, nurtured. I think she’s struggling.”
“I can understand that. Luckily, she’s still got a mama’s boy in you.”
“It’s hard to fill the space of two mama’s boys.” I watched his throat move as he swallowed. “Oh, shit, listen to this.” He turned the radio up. After a moment of listening to the music, I looked at him with a question in my eyes.
“What’s this?”
“Adam’s band. This is one of their singles.” Keane tapped his fingers on the dash just above the radio, his lips moving as he silently sang along.
“I guess I haven’t heard this one.” I closed my eyes, resting my head against the headrest, and let the hypnotic beat of the song lull me to sleep.
15
KEANE
Navy and I picked out an array of paint strips and I snagged the new deadbolt and a chain lock, just in case, as well as a few DVDs.
“She’s gonna hate that choice,” Navy said, pointing to one that looked like the cover artwork had been done by a third grader.
“I’ll save that bad boy for Sunday.”
“It’s my turn to pick,” she said. “Maybe we should watch it up at the cabin. I can bring my air mattress.”
“Baby bird,” I said gently, reminding her of our conversation in the car. My phone vibrated in my pocket as we waited in the checkout.
“I’ll ask her if she wants me to stay up there.”
“What about the Adorables?”
“They’re going camping with one of their friends.”
“Hard to imagine those girls camping.”
“Yeah,” Navy said huffing out a laugh. “Jade isn’t exactly a happy camper. But it’s her friend Abigail’s family. And apparently Abigail’s big brother is sexy or something.”
“Ah. So she’s enduring the torture of roughing in in the pursuit of male objectification.” I placed a hand on my heart. “She’s growing up, isn’t she?”
“She is.” Navy pulled out her wallet and my mouth flattened into a line. “Put your wallet away.”
“This stuff is for my sister.”
“Uh, no, it’s for my cabin.”
“That my sister is living in, for the time being.”
“Yeah. And so that makes me her sort-of landlord. Which means I pay for this shit.” I waved at the belt of items.
“But you wouldn’t be buying this stuff right now if it wasn’t for Violet.”
“Whether I buy it now or next week, that doesn’t change the fact that I’m paying for it.”
When Navy looked at me like the way she currently was doing, it was really hard to be firm with her.
“Look, for all intents and purposes, I’m her pseudo landlord for the time being. I mean, if we’re being honest, I’m a pretty shitty one. She’s got a stove with one working burner and a fridge that is straight from the eighties. This isn’t a big deal, Navy. It’s stuff I was going to buy anyway.”
“It’s hard for me to let you do this.”
“You’re not letting me.” I tapped her with my hip, moving her from in front of the card machine. “I’m gonna buy the paint too.” When she gave me a look like she was going to argue, I said, “Seriously, Navy. It’s not a big deal, I was going to do it anyway. Okay? Fuck.” I hadn’t meant to sound so impatient. But sometimes, when she resisted my help with her sisters—her biggest stressors—I just wanted her to say yes. To let me help her. To trust me that I could.
“Let me at least buy you guys dinner.” When I opened my mouth to object, she placed her fingers over my lips and held them there. “I want to, please. You’ve done so much.”
“It’s not a big deal,” I said around her fingers.
“I know.” She slid her hand along my jaw to the back of my head, squeezing gently as her fingers rubbed over the base of my scalp. “That’s why I want to do it.”
The feeling of her hands on my skin was doing strange things to the rest of my body. I didn’t get it. What was so different now, and did she feel it too? It seemed impossible that these feelings didn’t echo within her.
“Okay,” I finally relented. When my phone vibrated again, I slid it from my pocket.
“Who’s that?” Navy asked as I punched my pin into the card machine.
“Tori.”
“Oh.”
Hey ding-dong. Whatcha doin next weekend? It’d been a while since I’d seen Tori, a friend from childhood who had at one time been more than a friend. Whatever feelings there had been between us had dissolved into just an easy, funny friendship the older we’d gotten, but there were a few years as teens that I’d kind of lost my head over her.
“I think she wants to hang out next weekend.”
“You should invite her.” Navy turned away from me to bag the items as the cashier rang them up one by one.
“Yeah?” I asked.
“Go for it.”
I thanked the cashier as she told me the total and then pulled my card from the machine. As we exited the store, I started typing out my rep
ly.
Me: Working at the cabin. Want to come up?
Navy wasn’t exactly friends with Tori; Tori was Hollis’s friend, not hers. But Tori was good company and she might even provide some distraction for Violet. Having another female around might be good. “Unlike you, Tori doesn’t humor my bad movie tastes, so I guess it will be your turn a second week in a row.”
“What?” Navy asked, lifting her share of the bags into the back of the truck.
“For next Sunday. If Violet is cool with it, of course.”
“Won’t that be awkward?”
“Huh?” I unlocked the doors of the truck with my key fob and stared at her in confusion. “Awkward for whom?”
She gestured at herself and then to me. “Me, you. Us.”
“Why would that be awkward?”
“Because you and Tori have history.” She quickly pulled open her side of the truck and climbed in. I knew she was retreating from me, so I couldn’t read her face. I had two choices: to allow her to hide from me or to confront it.
I chose the latter.
Opening my door, I climbed in and waited until she looked at me. “You know Tori and I haven’t hooked up in a long time.”
“I know you haven’t dated in a long time.” She purposefully changed the verb I’d used, implying that we’d had some friends with benefits situations over the years. Which might’ve been true, but it still had been a long time since then.
“We haven’t done either in years. Come on, you know that.”
“Do I?” She plucked a piece of fuzz from her jacket. She didn’t want to have this conversation; I could tell that much from her body language. But the way she pressed me told me that deep down, she needed answers to this.
“I’m not having Tori come visit for the sake of having sex with her.” Once I’d said it, it was as if it had sucked all the air out of the truck. We had purposefully not talked about the night we’d spent together, but maybe we needed to. “If it matters at all, I haven’t slept with anyone since Friday night.”
She was facing forward, but I saw her eyes slide to look at me once.
One Big Mistake: a friends to lovers rom-com Page 16