That Turned Ugly Fast

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by Mark Berriman




  Also by Mark Berriman:

  Scar Lit

  Brutally Frank

  Kink in the Chain

  That Turned Ugly Fast

  Poems by

  Mark Berriman

  North Star Press of St. Cloud, Inc.

  St. Cloud, Minnesota

  Copyright © 2015 Mark Berriman

  All rights reserved.

  Print ISBN: 978-0-87839-815-7

  eBook ISBN: 978-1-68201-009-9

  First Edition: September 2015

  Published by:

  North Star Press

  P.O. Box 451

  St. Cloud, MN 56302

  www.northstarpress.com

  Contents

  Foreword

  Republicans Urinated in My Yard

  Hiding from Harry Seekins

  When They Put Me in the Morgue Drawer, Her Name Will Be on My Lips

  Xcel Energy, Formerly Known as NSP

  The Bookworm

  The Crease Between Her Brows

  Smothered

  Gimme Gimme Gimme and the Me Toos

  Mutiny

  Those Right Said Fred Guys

  Our Future Leaders

  She Says

  The Helpless Parent

  The Well

  Upstairs at Graceland

  Angry Brigade

  The Dance

  The Man Who Kissed Hands

  The Greenest Eyes

  Child Number 4, Cherry on Top, Part 2

  Putting Dots Together

  Flew Too Close to the Sun

  National Rifle Association

  Beautimus

  The Thing Out Back

  Lost in Lights

  Children of the Corn Syrup

  Destruction Chorus

  Robin Hood

  Baby Teeth Are Sources of Stem Cells, Who Knew

  The Bad Scene

  The Longest Winter

  Albert Dekker Was a Veteran Character Actor

  Election Day

  There Is Only Us

  Clutter

  Why Won’t She Just Collect Her Things and Leave?

  Then the Puritans Sent Us to Helltown

  Recovery Project

  -15 Degrees

  Jealous ’n’ Stuff

  Bridget Bishop Bathrobe

  We’ve Filled Wisconsin with Bad

  Trying to Roll with It

  More Than I Ever Could Have Wished For

  Duck, Duck, Gray Duck and the Minnesota Middle Finger

  I Am Erosion

  The Confession

  Foreword

  Scott Wannberg’s North Country cousin puts his oar in and plays the burnt, sticky black keys, kicks open the rotten grey shutters to see who’s poaching on the other side of the poisoned well, who’s sifting through peoples’ garbage downtown, which witch forgot to drain the pipes before the big freeze, and who left the lights on in the root cellar. He burns the midnight oil to the last greasy drop, goes under the knife so we may understand precisely what kind of curiosity killed the cat that barked up the wrong tree and added insult to injury below the belt while sitting on the fence, recklessly takes the bull by the horns and demands clarification of events leading up to spilt milk, water under the bridge and fine kettles of fish, mapping forks in the road that whistle Dixie and blow away the cobwebs that mask the best thing since sliced bread jumped on the bandwagon with a sinking feeling and got cut off at the knees while counting chickens before the eggs were hatched, grinning like the shot fox that put those eggs in one basket, pretending to bend over backwards so the cat could get your tongue and hold your horses to better steal your thunder and beat around the bush. Berriman tirelessly takes it all with a grain of salt and hits the nail on the head like a whack-a-mole to prove that your guess is as good as mine.

  –Viggo Mortensen

  “All art is unstable.”

  —David Bowie

  Republicans Urinated in My Yard

  The American people

  have spoken

  Shredding the constitution

  they say

  Lady Liberty

  She’s come

  She’s been

  She’s gone

  Republicans

  urinated

  in all four corners

  of the yard

  Hiding from Harry Seekins

  He says he’s balls deep

  in the devil and I

  will not challenge

  his claim

  His eyes were open

  but he wasn’t there

  Seeking

  Always seeking

  Sticky residue

  up and down arms

  from nicotine patches

  he wears

  Three up

  Three up

  Three up

  Three up at a time

  He is the itch

  as the methheads

  scratch their scalps

  down to the skull

  His is Muhammad Ali’s

  phantom punch

  He is Foreman slow

  and deliberate moving mountains

  Dancing in the bone yard

  He is the man in the bunny

  suit waving from the side

  of the road

  Train cars full of would

  have could have

  should have trail behind

  him on a leash

  When They Put Me in the Morgue Drawer, Her Name Will Be on My Lips

  She is sick

  in the street again

  Kneeling before

  store front churches

  vacant juke joints

  No one is keeping

  score anymore

  She drained all my fluids

  with her twin cities kisses

  She was kind

  enough to leave

  a note

  Medicine shows

  with midways as long

  as city blocks

  I told her not to

  buy it

  but she bought it

  She let go

  of the edges

  Stopped reaching

  for safety of sidelines

  She stopped

  worrying about fitting in

  Sun shining through

  dense trees

  Knee-high socks

  her braids swing

  She explored patches

  of woods to find

  the best ferns

  Heart-shaped leaves

  Xcel Energy, Formerly Known as NSP

  When you register

  to vote

  in Minnesota

  you must

  provide a picture ID

  or driver’s license

  and a utility bill

  showing current address

  This year

  my bill was a disconnection

  notice from Xcel Energy

  Fitting, somehow

  The Bookworm

  Applause welcomes her

  as she arrives, again

  She always thinks

  that way

  Her internal soundtrack

 
Applause wrestles aside

  The Mission Impossible theme song

  The Peter Gunn theme

  A Shot in the Dark

  John Zorn’s saxophone

  spitting sparks

  The applause

  An ordinary day began

  with an ordinary morning

  grappling into long shadows

  of an early afternoon

  Whispers break

  her soundtrack into pieces

  as she passes

  the girls

  with their long painted nails

  Snapping their pink

  gum behind

  blackened teeth

  The girls who were smoking

  Newports in the back

  alley where you can

  barely hear

  yourself over

  the sound

  of the fans

  whirring away

  Throwing out

  heat and exhaust

  that smells like the bad

  end of a bad day

  They call her

  “Bookworm”

  behind her

  back she knows

  but she is fine

  with that

  There was a time

  when all she thought

  of was a dissecting pan

  filled with black wax

  A worm stretched apart

  open with pins

  Scalpel

  Forceps

  Probe & Seeker

  The smell of formaldehyde

  and Mrs. Knoepfel

  barking instructions

  on the proper way

  to cut the clitellum

  without damaging

  the dorsal blood vessel

  the central

  nerve cord

  She stops

  at the globe

  sitting upon its clear

  plexiglass stand

  She touches the Pacific

  and turns it

  ever so slightly

  with fingers deep

  in the blue you only find

  on old postcards

  from exotic places

  And globes

  A polished penny

  on the floor catches

  her eye looks

  like its straight

  out of Frisco

  or Philly

  Freshly minted

  She picks it up

  and puts the coin

  in her faded black jeans

  to join its sisters

  in her pocket

  Jingling and jangling

  to her rhythmic strut

  She removes

  her coat with maps

  of the Old World

  and the New York

  subway system

  sewn into its interior

  Eurasia

  Crosstown Line

  Africa

  Nassau Street Line

  She approaches

  the table

  The wood spread

  out before her

  Knot upon glorious

  knot with a grain

  put there

  by god

  She spreads

  the slender volumes

  Collected works

  Selected works

  Her father told her

  its not safe

  to consort

  with poets

  They are a dangerous sort

  with heads in clouds

  Dreamers

  Unpractical grammar slayers

  Idealists

  These descendents

  of Odin and Saga are not

  to be trusted

  But her fingertips

  calloused and rough

  from yellowed pages

  cannot resist

  their pull

  Some days she just needs

  to sit

  She needs

  to read

  She needs

  to think

  She needs

  to not think

  She needs

  to escape

  Depart

  through

  the pages

  put there

  by poets

  The Crease Between Her Brows

  I can see the line

  of her jaw

  The soft creases

  in her skin

  when she smiles

  The crease between

  her brows

  I tell her

  “don’t do that”

  She can’t

  help it

  The fine gray hairs

  you have to get

  real close

  to see

  I have been real

  close to see

  That spot

  on the back

  of her neck

  The small

  of her back

  Her hips when I pull

  her close to me

  Smothered

  His autumn

  lust crushed

  by snowy flakes

  of winter’s hello

  Gimme Gimme Gimme and the Me Toos

  They will lift

  your shutters an inch

  at a time

  Our American dream

  They will shut

  the shutters

  on your yesterdays

  on your tomorrows

  If you’re born poor

  chances are (sing it)

  you’re going

  to remain poor

  Hereditary rule

  Sent by the hand

  of god

  to rule over us

  Bush

  Clinton

  Walton

  Koch

  The economy stagnates

  Life gets harder

  People get meaner

  And their pockets grow deeper

  Our search

  for social justice

  Our search

  for common good

  has been handicapped

  Our community needs

  healing

  restoration

  My needs your needs

  and the needs of our community

  We should flourish together

  we don’t

  We move through

  a fear-based world

  Protecting ourselves

  Protecting our children

  from the “unknowns”

  But we know

  the gimme gimme gimme

  and the me toos

  Mutiny

  I’ve got your mutiny,

  right here.

  Those Right Said Fred Guys

  Unspoken chorus of concern

  Ticker tape parades

  Mid-westerners

  and their passive aggressive guilt

  Bloody carpets

  Trailer park tattoos

  Wired and well connected

  but I lost what I had invested

  All the clever kids

  Bored

  Kicking

  their bass drums

  And those Right Said Fred guys

  beat their bare chests

&
nbsp; and laugh

  at our habits

  The cooks

  cook

  The makers

  make

  And god willing

  the thinkers will

  think

  of a way to finally save us

  Our Future Leaders

  Once upon a time we found

  shortcuts our parents knew

  nothing about

  We took pride

  in knowing how

  to get places

  Now we don’t

  allow our children

  to cross streets

  We are born

  with the need

  to do great things

  Our play dates

  were not arranged

  Play-date?

  What the hell

  is a play date?

  Our younger selves would have asked

  We built bridges

  from planks laid

  across the creek

  We were expected

  to show

  up for dinner

  Generation Pussy

  Sunscreen

  Paper cuts

  The way you coddle

  Bike Helmets

  Pain Reliever

 

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