by Sadie Sears
I knew it, but I didn’t feel like arguing with her.
“Are you thinking about the claiming bite?” She closed the folder and laid her arms over it on her lap.
“No.” I most certainly wasn’t. I didn’t want to be cured by a guy who didn’t really care. I mean, it would’ve been nice to be able to get out of bed and take care of my daughter, drive her to her theater group, cook for her. But not that way. Not by promising myself to a life with a dragon who couldn’t be bothered to check in.
“Why not?”
We’d been through this a thousand times, but apparently, there was no limit to the number of times she was going to make me explain it to her. But today, I didn’t feel like it. If I wanted to go through it again and again, I would’ve invited Leath back to try to talk me into it.
I sighed. “Gretta, it’s none of your fucking business.”
She stood, snapped her mouth shut, shook her head, and stomped out of my room. I didn’t blame her. I probably would’ve walked out, too. I probably wouldn’t have stood at the bottom of the stairs in the foyer and bitched about her, though.
“Stubborn ass. Who in their right mind would want to stay sick all the time?”
For her information, it wasn’t all the time.
But before I could yell down that I could hear her, the front door hinges squeaked open then the door latched into the frame again. “Hey, Aunt G. Sophie brought me home so I could get some more clothes. And so I can see Mom for a little while. Is she up?”
“Up and stubborn as a mule.”
She laughed, and her feet pounded up the steps. Her bedroom was farther from the steps than mine, so she must’ve decided to get her things first because I saw the back of her as she passed my doorway. Gretta and Sophie continued to chat in the foyer.
“How is she today?”
The humph of Gretta’s frustrated sigh carried up the stairs. “You have to talk some sense into her. This guy could save her. Could end all of this. But do you think she can see past herself and her own selfishness to let him help?”
Selfishness was a little harsh. It wasn’t selfish to want real love. And here I thought her bedside manner had improved. Weren’t doctors supposed to respect their patient’s wishes?
“It’s a big decision. But believe me, I’ve tried.”
“Tell her it’s selfish. Ask her if it’s fair to Zoe to make a child watch her mother lie in bed for days on end in pain.” Wow. Gretta was on a roll. “And how the hell is she supposed to run a business with you if she’s laid up in bed all the time?”
It wasn’t all the time. It was sometimes. And this was by far the worst I’d ever been.
“I know how bad you want this for her. She knows, too, but it has to be Lila’s decision.” Sophie paused, probably looking around. “Where is he, anyway?”
“She said she drove him away, too.” Gretta’s eyes were probably rolling back in her head. “Told him to leave her alone and go away or whatever. So, he did.”
“What about…” Their voices faded, and I was tired of listening anyway.
Gretta was angry, and I understood, but it was still not kind to stand in my own house and talk about me like that. It was something I would have to talk to her about later, but Zoe breezed into my room, set her bag just inside the door then came to sit on the bed beside me.
“How are you feeling?” She spoke softly, the version of Gretta my little sister had once been.
“I think I’m on the mend.” I hated lying to her, but I hated her having to worry about me more. “I’ll be up and around in no time.”
She nodded as my phone made the almost dead battery tinkle on the table. “Will you plug this in?” I hated that the charger was across the room, but the house was old and electric outlets were in short supply. I had an old-fashioned digital alarm clock and lamp plugged into the one beside my bed. And the only other one in the room was by the second window.
She came back to the bed and lay beside me this time; hands tucked under her chin as she looked at me. “Where’s Leath been lately?”
I frowned. The question of the day. I didn’t want to make it a practice to draw her into my personal drama, but I also didn’t want to lie to her. “We had a little argument.”
“About what?”
“Grown-up stuff that happens when two people are so very different.” Dragon and not dragon. Man and woman. Sane and crazy. Although I wasn’t sure who was who in the last one.
“Because he’s a dragon?” She nodded to the window. “Last week you thought watching him fly was sexy.”
Well, it was. “I know. But he doesn’t understand all the nuances of relationships and things.”
“Nuances.” She smiled like she had all the wisdom in the world inside her head. “Mom, it is so obvious he loves you for who you are. He took care of you and never complained. And you should see the way he looks at you when he thinks nobody is looking. It’s like you’re sunshine after he’s been stuck in the rain.”
I stared at her because at some point she’d grown up, and I’d managed to miss it. A lump formed in the back of my throat and tears threatened. But I took a deep breath and swallowed it all back so I could move forward and press a kiss against her forehead. I didn’t know how long this closeness between us would last before the teen years invaded, but I hoped we had more time, especially more time where I wasn’t stuck in my room in my bed.
“You’re pretty great, you know that?” She really was. And a prouder mother never lived.
“I know.” She nodded, and then a smile broke across her face. “You’re pretty great, too.” The smile widened. “You know who else is pretty great? Leath.” She hadn’t even waited for me to guess. “He’s a great cook, and a great guy, and a great dragon. Bet he’d be a great husband, too.”
Sophie poked her head into the room. “Hey, Zoe, I can’t find your Breakfast at Tiffany’s costume and pearls. If you need them this week, you’d better get them.”
Zoe sat up, bent to kiss my cheek, then bounced out of my room and Sophie came in to sit beside me. She had a long skirt she tucked around her knees as she pulled her legs onto the bed and crossed them in front of her. From her cardigan pocket she produced the silk bag where she kept her favorite tarot deck.
“You want a reading?”
Of course I did. I trusted her like I trusted no one else and her readings had never led me astray. Since I had so many decisions to make, a little help couldn’t hurt. I nodded.
“All right.” She closed her eyes and spread the cards in formation. We followed the rituals closely, always, because spirit guides appreciated rituals and were more likely to bless the reading. She turned over three cards from the formation. “Wheel of Fortune, Death, and the Lovers’ card.” All major arcana cards. Not unheard of, but certainly not common. She cocked an eyebrow at me.
The Death card never really meant death. It was an ending. And my stomach churned like it always did when I saw the skeleton knight holding the white rose banner flip over. Death didn’t scare me as whatever was or would be coming to an end in my life. I wasn’t quite optimistic enough to believe in one door closing meant another opening.
Sophie watched me for a second. “It’s time for you to put an end to the old and welcome in the new.” She spoke slowly as if each thought was being fed to her from somewhere outside her own mind. It was possible, even probable considering who she was and how well tuned she was with her spirit guides. “If you don’t, the pain will worsen. Not only physical pain. And your relationships need to change.”
Even the spirit guides were working against me. “I’m not going to change just so some guy will want to be in a relationship with me. I’ve been fine without one all this time.” And it was true. I didn’t need a man. Having one around had been nice. Who didn’t like letting someone else kill the spider in the bathtub? But I was perfectly capable of managing a little arachnicide without the big strong man and his giant shoe doing the snuffing for me.
Sophie sho
ok her head at me as she gathered her cards. “It isn’t about changing you so you can accept love from someone else. It’s about changing you so you can love yourself.” Oh, she made it sound so easy, like the decision wouldn’t affect the rest of my life. My exceptionally long life, if I agreed to become a dragon and didn’t go stark raving mad. I would only age one year for every ten I lived. Not wholly bad if I didn’t mind watching everyone I loved die before me. Except Gretta, who had also lucked into, or un-lucked into, depending on how we looked at it, this fountain of youth dragon thing.
But Sophie continued to stare at me. “You know, Lila, I’ll help you any way I can, but if there’s a way you can relieve all this pain you’re in, you should do it. You should grab that guy and enjoy all the things you’ve been giving up to be a mom. And you’re a great mom.” She nodded and smiled. “Think about it. Okay?”
They all thought I was closed-minded about this because I hadn’t thought it all through—the bite and the destiny. In truth, I hadn’t thought about much else. Maybe this was my chance to be cured, maybe in the grand scheme of life, I was supposed to do this because I had a greater purpose that I would need to be alive in a hundred years to realize. Or maybe the bliss I’d felt with Leath was a reward or promise to make up for losing my parents’ love and being afflicted with such an unpredictable disease.
I waited until Sophie and Zoe left before I sent Gretta to town for coconut milk ice cream, then sat, thinking. Pondering. Time for change. Of course, because who wanted to go on like this? Who wanted to choose to suffer? Not me. I hated pain, hated the agony of muscle cramps and aches, of stiff bones and muscles, of numbness and fatigue.
Time for change. Time for something new, to love myself enough to let someone else love me. To open my heart to Leath. And while he had been fabulous during my relapses, I had no idea how he would deal with gray hair and wrinkles if I made him not only watch me suffer through years of MS relapses, but also the effects of aging.
Facts were facts, and the truth was, I loved Leath. I hated being away from him and hated being the weak link in the positivity of our relationship chain. He was sure we belonged together. Sure that claiming me was the exact right thing to do. Sure he would love me until the day we died. And he was sure he wanted that to be a hundred thousand years—or however long dragons lived—down life’s road. He was sure enough for both of us so there wasn’t any need for me to question.
And if I didn’t love him with all of my heart before this moment, that realization would’ve pumped up the emotion. I’d been using excuse after excuse to keep from getting in too deep. Sophie was right that there were risks in everything we did. I was tired of using excuses to get away from living how I wanted to live, and I wanted to live my life with Leath.
I flung the blanket toward the foot of the bed then twisted so I could sit on the edge closest to the window and my phone. I wanted to call Leath, straighten out the things between us I’d worked really hard to destroy lately. I walked to the window, steady, proud, like I was already on the mend just by thinking what I was thinking.
I dialed and waited while the phone rang, turning my face up to the sun streaming in through the window. It was a beautiful day. I hadn’t heard a mower in a while, and I was probably going to have to call someone in. I looked down to gauge how much time I had left before they would need a tractor to make it through, but the grass didn’t matter when I saw a man walking toward the house from the woods. He was all in black, from the hoodie to the pants to the gloves on his hands. But it was as he walked toward the house, he looked up, saw me in the window and smiled. Frank. His name was a scream inside my head. He brought a long silver blade to his lips as if kissing it then continued his way toward the house.
And thank God, Leath answered. “Lila?”
“Leath, Frank is here. And he’s trying to get in my house.” I tried to calm the terror in my voice, but as I spoke, I heard the back door open and close. “Oh, God. He’s here.” Panic rolled through me in waves that only increased in strength instead of ebbing away.
“Lila, I’m on my way. Hide. Find somewhere and hide. Don’t come out until you hear me, do you understand?” The urgency in his voice upped the intensity of my panic by a few hundred degrees.
My hands started shaking so bad that the phone slipped from them and fell. It hit the floor and blew apart, and my only link to the world outside this house died with it.
19
Leath
I made it just outside my house into the backyard before I shifted. Even if I’d tried to stop it, my dragon would’ve overpowered me. It was part of who we were—protectors, and we were in love with the woman in trouble. The truck wouldn’t be fast enough.
I didn’t need to jump. I shot into the air and flew like my life depended on it. And it did. If something happened to Lila, if she so much as broke a nail, I was going to kill Frank. I’d tear his arms off first. Beat him with them. The thought gave me a burst of speed, and my dragon roared, startling several people on the streets below.
The house was close, and I could smell Lila’s fear, feel the intensity of it, though it didn’t match the level of fear I’d heard in her voice before her phone cut off. I aimed for the house and spotted Lila on the front porch, curled on one of the wicker seats. In the front yard, Frank was on his face with Theo sitting on his back. A knife reflected in the grass nearby, and my vision went red.
Frank had been there to hurt her. Not just vandalize her workplace. Not just stand around her gate or hide in her bushes. Not just leave creepy notes or pictures for her to find. He’d brought a knife with the intention of physically harming my mate.
He glanced up and his eyes went wide. I roared, and the bushes and grass responded. There was power in the earth, and the plants and trees that grew in it, and I was one with that power. I controlled it. The branches and blades of grass extended, wrapping and tangling around him. Theo backed up a couple of paces, keeping a wary eye on Frank until we were sure he couldn’t move.
Once he was wrapped up in a solid cocoon, I carefully laid one foot on him and roared again, making sure he got the hint loud and clear this time. His crying and sobbing didn’t so much as faze me.
Gretta’s car pulled in the driveway and she vaulted from the car, racing around the back of the house. For a second, she disappeared, presumably to strip and stash her clothes before she shifted, and then she rose from beside the house.
I could still sense Lila’s fear, her panic, and I needed to get to her, to ease her, no matter how much she resisted, or how many times she told me to leave. My dragon would tear me apart if I left her now, if I didn’t stay and make sure she was all right.
I tossed Frank to Gretta whose fire danced in her golden eyes as she pinned him against the house with a talon. She would hold him until the police arrived. I headed to the rear of the house and shifted back, retrieved a pair of sweatpants from the bag I kept in Lila’s laundry room, and then ran through the house to the front porch where I’d seen her sitting last.
She was holding a piece of glass like a weapon in her hand, aiming it where Gretta had Frank dangling upside down, and I was drawn back to the first time I saw her standing in her living room with a candlestick, prepared to maim me. I smiled. That had been the minute I knew she was destined for me.
She looked up, closed her eyes and breathed out slowly as she released the piece of jagged glass she’d been holding. “Oh, my God, Leath. You were incredible.” She glanced at the yard, then back at me. “I mean, Theo was, too, but… Did you do that with the bushes?”
I smiled. She wasn’t mad. She wasn’t scared anymore. She was staring at me with heavy eyelids and the corner of her lip pulled between her teeth, like I hung the moon. And for her, I would try.
I nodded. “Yeah.” She’d seen it happen when I shifted before, but this had been more… just more.
“Holy shit.” She stood, slowly, slower than she would’ve when feeling fully healthy, but she didn’t falter. And if she had,
I would’ve caught her because it was what I was born to do. To be by her side no matter what. Now to convince her.
“I am so sorry, Lila. I was wrong to try to use only your illness to convince you to be with me, especially since I love who you are.” Love, hell. I was obsessed. “I never want you to change anything about yourself. I love you the way you are.”
“I want you to claim me.”
My heart clenched, and my dragon roared. Lila wanted me, to be claimed by me, to be with me. I picked her up and swung her around before stopping and pulling her close, carefully, gently, to spare her any pain. She was my mate. My destined mate. “I love you, Lila. So much.” And I had amends to make, but I couldn’t while she had her lips pressed against mine, her body back where it belonged, in my arms. “Lila.” I laughed. Just to say her name made me happy.
“I love you.” She let her hands slide down my back to the waistband of my sweats then inside where she cupped my ass, giving it a squeeze.
Oh, God, I had missed her.
“I love you, and I love the way you looked outside my house. The way your scales reflect in the sun, the power. You’re magnificent.” She spoke with such admiration and such awe, an appreciation I’d never get tired of hearing.
But right now, I wanted to hear more about her wanting me to claim her. “Are you sure this is what you want, Lila?”
She laid her hand over my jaw, stroked my cheek with her thumb and used her eyes to convey everything she felt. There was so much expression in those hazel depths. “I never want to feel helpless again. It isn’t about being sick or healthy. I want to be able to defend myself and Zoe.” She gave my ass another squeeze. “I want to be strong, and I want a strong mate. I want you. And I want to spend the rest of my life loving you.”
No words in my life had ever made me happier. Nothing she could’ve said would ever mean more. This was the woman of my dreams, and I was about to make her a dragon, claim her as my mate for the rest of our lives. We had a lot to work out, a lot to talk about, but right now, all I wanted was to kiss Lila. So, I did.