“Secretly, my arse!” Abbi says, laughing.
“Does this mean we can all admit that we already knew?” Liv asks.
“Yes, shut up, smartarse. I know we weren’t actually very secretive, but we knew people would have opinions, so we needed to make sure it was serious first.”
“I’m happy for you, son. She’s a good girl,” Dad says with a smile on his face.
“Yes, she is.”
We’ve been handing out presents around the room for about twenty minutes. I’ve got the standard socks and pants from Mum and Dad as well as a family photo for my house, a couple of cookbooks, and a rather large voucher for a garden centre to buy myself a set of garden furniture. I’ve also opened a t-shirt from my sisters and all kinds of smellies. They’ve also given me a bag to take home for Molly. Guilt hangs heavy at not being able to give anything in return—that is, until my mum squeals on the other side of Dad’s bed.
“What is it?” we ask her at the same time.
She gets up and comes running towards me with some paperwork in her hand before hugging me tightly. “You said you didn’t get us anything, you liar!” she says, laughing. Her delight is clear on her face.
“Mum, I wasn’t lying. I really haven’t bought anything.”
She stands back and looks at me before passing the paper over. My eyes go wide as I read what it says.
“Holy shit.”
“What is it?” Liv asks.
“It’s a voucher for a holiday in Paris in Mum and Dad’s name…from me and…Molly. She did this,” I say, looking up to Mum. “Molly has done this…I had no idea.”
“Why would she do that after what I did to her?” Mum asks, confused.
“Because this is who she is, Mum, not whoever you had in your head. I told her I wasn’t getting you anything because of what happened, but she wasn’t happy about it.”
“We were talking about wanting to go to Paris that weekend at yours over dinner. She must have been listening.”
“See? This is who she is,” I say again, just to make sure she knows.
The surprises don’t end there. Before long, Abbi and Liv are handed similar looking envelopes.
“What has she done now?” I ask, laughing.
“She’s booked for the three of us to go to London to watch a show we were talking about for a weekend later in the year,” they explain, showing me the paperwork.
Well, shit…if my girlfriend isn’t the most caring woman in the world, then I don’t know who is. I just wish she were here to see the excited looks on their faces. She would love it.
“Ryan, are you going to open those?” Mum asks, pulling me out of my thoughts.
When I look up, she’s nodding towards the presents on my lap. The last ones in the room to be opened. I’ve been holding off because, after seeing what she got my family, I’m kind of scared to find out what she got me.
The first couple I open are fine—more boxers, some t-shirts and jeans. There’s a photograph of the two of us that I took in bed one night. I look down at the last box and slowly start to pull the paper away. My heart hammers and my hands start to sweat a little because, if I know Molly like I think I do, then whatever is in here is going to knock me on my arse.
“Fuck,” is all I can say when the box emerges from the paper. I slowly open it up and there, gleaming at me, is the most stunning timepiece I have ever seen.
“Holy shit…do you know how much that costs?” Abbi says next to me in a slightly higher voice than usual. All I can do is nod as I pull the watch out of the box. Something tells me to turn it over and, when I do, I see that I was right. There, inscribed on the back, are Molly’s words.
All of my love,
Forever.
Molly x
The memory of us in the shower the night of the stag do hits me at full force, remembering when she said those words for the first time. I feel myself tear up and Abbi’s hand comes to rest on my shoulder in comfort.
After staring at it for a few minutes with the room in silence, I slide the watch into place on my wrist before standing up and looking at everyone’s slightly choked up faces.
“I’m sorry, but there’s somewhere I need to be.”
Chapter Eighteen
Molly
When I woke this morning, it took me a few seconds to place where I was. I stretched my arm out across the bed to find Ryan, but he wasn’t there. It wasn’t until the unmistakable smell of Susan’s homemade waffles hit my nose that I remembered where I was, that Ryan wasn’t here with me, and that I was spending another Christmas alone.
“Good morning, angel. Merry Christmas,” Susan sings from her spot in front of the oven as I join the rest of the family around the table.
As soon as my arse hits the chair, Susan is placing a plate of hot waffles and a mug of steaming hot tea in front of me. I instantly reach for the mug and hold it in both hands.
“Is this new?” Susan asks, lifting my wrist up.
“It was a Christmas present from Ryan. I opened it before I came down.”
I look at the charm bracelet I’m now proudly wearing. I can’t help smiling, but at the same time my eyes water at Ryan’s thoughtfulness. There are two charms currently on my bracelet: one is an angel, and the other is two interlocked rose gold hearts.
Susan looks up from inspecting the two charms when I sniff. She smiles at me with her eyes full of sympathy. “He’ll be back before you know it,” she whispers to me before going back to making sure we’re all full to bursting with breakfast.
“Mum, how long until dinner’s ready?” Dec asks after we’ve finished opening the presents quite a while later.
“Two hours yet, angel.”
“How are you hungry already?” Lilly asks, bemused. “You had, like, twenty waffles this morning!”
“An engine this perfect needs good fuel, Lil,” Dec says, lifting his shirt to show off his abs just to prove his point.
“Oh, put it away, no one wants to see your body,” Lilly says, throwing a cushion at him.
“Huh, my abs usually get a different reaction from women,” he deadpans, returning the cushion, which hits Lilly square on the head.
I decide to get up before they start properly fighting. “I’m going to tidy this up, if you want to help,” I say, looking around the room at all the scrunched up wrapping paper. “Then I’m going for a lie down, if that’s okay?”
Susan, as always, got everyone perfect presents. I love sitting and watching them all enjoy opening what they’ve got. I don’t need presents; watching the happiness around me is enough, even if it’s tinged with a little sadness with the loss of Hannah. No one has mentioned her yet, so I’m guessing everyone is just trying to get through the day in one piece. I can’t imagine she’s far from anyone’s minds.
“Of course, don’t worry about this. Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum here can get it,” Susan says, pointing at the twins.
I make my way up to the guest bedroom I slept in last night. When I look in the mirror, all I can see is my sad, tired eyes. No wonder everyone’s been acting strangely around me. I look like I could break down at any moment. My skin is unusually pale, my eyes have dark rings around them, and they’re rimmed in red from either tiredness or crying after opening my presents from Ryan earlier, I’m not really sure which.
Leaning back against the bedroom door as soon as the latch clicks closed, I let out a huge sigh. I glance around the room and, the moment my eyes land on the teddy bear Ryan bought for me lying in the middle of the bed, a sob erupts from me without warning.
My back slides down the door until my arse hits the floor. I put my head on my knees and give myself over to my tears.
The stress of the last few weeks with work being crazy, Ryan’s mum, my parents and brothers has taken its toll, and I’m completely exhausted. I love Ryan with everything I am, but hiding our relationship for the past couple of months has been hard. I know it was the right thing to do, but keeping secrets from the people closest to me h
as caused more stress than I thought it would. I’m done hiding. I hoped that we would be together when we told everyone our news, but that obviously isn’t how fate intended it to happen.
Once I’ve pulled myself together, I get myself up off the floor and slump down on the edge of the bed. I pull my phone out of my jeans pocket before lying back on the pillow and putting it to my ear after pressing Call on Ryan’s name.
It rings until it goes to voicemail—again. I drop the phone next to me, grab the teddy bear, and hold it close to my chest.
I know it’s not Ryan’s fault. His dad his ill, for fuck’s sake, but I can’t stop feeling like I’ve been abandoned. I know that’s not true. I could tell by the look in his eyes when we parted yesterday. He didn’t want to leave just as much as I didn’t want him to go.
I’m trying my best not to get annoyed with him because he’s probably in the hospital, but it’s not that easy. It’s Christmas day, and I haven’t spoken to my boyfriend.
I come around feeling really hot. At some point, I’d managed to get myself under the covers whilst still being fully clothed. I flip them off and turn over, keeping the bear tight to my chest. I’ve no idea how long I’ve been asleep, but I feel like I could do with some more. I’m just fading away again when a shiver runs down my spine.
I crack open one eye to put my mind at rest. I mean, I’m in the Morrisons’ guest room—who the hell would be watching me sleep?
I have to blink a couple of times, because what I’m seeing cannot be right. I must be dreaming. I open them both this time just to check, but he’s still there and it’s not my imagination playing tricks on me.
Standing, leaning back against the door, is Ryan. The corners of his lips curl up when he sees me awake. I run my eyes all over him, because if this is a dream, I need to make the most of it. I run my eyes up his thick thighs to where his jeans are resting low on his hips, giving me a hint of what he’s wearing underneath. I continue my journey, taking in his thick knit jumper stretched over his broad chest and shoulders. I run my eyes up his neck. I take in his stubble-covered jaw, up past his eyes, and to his head, covered in a grey knit beanie hat. It’s sitting so far back on his head, I have no idea how it’s staying put, but he looks edible with his messy dirty blonde hair sticking out the front and falling over his eyes.
I’m pulled from my thoughts when he moves towards me. He lowers himself so that he’s sitting on the edge of the mattress and looks down at me while running his knuckles down my cheek.
“Am I dreaming?”
“No, gorgeous,” he says, toeing his boots off and lying down next to me. “I came back for you. I couldn’t cope being away from you any longer.”
He places his hand on my cheek and wipes away the few tears that have fallen, when I notice the watch is on his wrist. “Do you like it?”
“Are you kidding? I love it. Thank you so much. Have you opened yours?”
I look down at the bear now squashed between our chests, and Ryan laughs as he follows my eyes.
“I guess you have, then. Did you like the bracelet?”
Before I answer, I shove at Ryan’s chest as hard as I can. He must take pity on me because he rolls onto his back easily, allowing me to straddle his waist. Leaning forward so my lips are just touching his, I whisper, “I love it, but I love you more…” I take a breath to carry on telling him how glad I am that he’s here and how badly I’ve missed him, but Ryan can’t wait any longer, because he presses his lips hard to mine and his tongue passes my open lips. His arms come around my back and he holds me tight to him while he kisses me like he hasn’t seen me in months, not hours.
Our kiss soon turns into something much more heated as we explore every inch of each other’s mouths. Ryan’s hands creep up under my top and his fingers pinch my peaked nipples though my bra while I grind against his length.
I pull my lips from his so I can try to catch my breath. “I can’t believe you came back. Are you sure I’m not dreaming?”
“I’m sure, gorgeous. God, I want to be inside you so badly,” he groans in my ear before he starts kissing and nibbling down my neck.
Fuck, I want that, too. Why couldn’t we be at home alone right now, not at the Morrisons’? And from the smell now wafting through the room, I’d say dinner is nearly ready. “Ryan, please,” I’m so close already, I’m sure Ryan has some magic power over me.
“Molly…you’re killing me. We can’t, Susan said dinner was almost ready before I came up here.”
I’m moved off Ryan and rolled onto my side so we’re facing each other again.
“It would have been quick,” I say, pouting.
“That may well be true, but I’m not having all them listening when you scream my name. Plus, I want to take my time with you.”
I’m just about to respond when I hear Susan’s voice. “Molly, Ryan, dinner is ready.”
“See,” Ryan says with a smirk as he gets up and adjusts himself in his jeans before heading towards the door.
“Ry,” I say before he grabs the handle.
“Yes, gorgeous?”
“Thank you for coming back.”
“There isn’t anywhere I’d rather be.” He grabs my hand and pulls me along towards the stairs but, as we enter the Morrison’s dining room, I feel him go to pull his hand from mine. I hold on tight and, together, we walk up to the table. All eyes turn our way.
“Ah, angel, you look so much better,” Susan comments when she sees me.
“Thank you. I needed that.” I know I’m implying the sleep I had, but what I really needed was the person stood next to me.
“I…uh…we…” I look up to Ryan and he just smiles back at me encouragingly. I take a deep breath and start again. “We have an announcement to make…” I look around at the faces of my adopted family, and I can’t help but laugh when Susan starts excitedly bouncing in her seat. “Ryan and I are together. I know that—”
“Don’t even think about going there,” Susan interrupts. “We’re all so happy for you both, and we are ever so thankful that we don’t need to pretend we don’t know anymore.”
Ryan
We just get seated when Emma clears her throat at the other side of the table from Molly and I, making everyone look up. “Okay, so as we’re making announcements, I’d like to say something.”
The silence is deafening as we wait. I cannot begin to imagine what’s running through her head right now. Molly squeezes my hand tighter.
“So…” Emma begins, “I know you’ve all been worried about me these past few months, and I’m sorry that I’ve caused that, but I’ve been trying my hardest to deal with losing Hannah. I feel like I’m now at a point where I want to share some things with you and ask for some help.”
“Go on,” Susan encourages when Emma looks like she’s about to bolt from the room.
“Okay, so…it all started when I wanted somewhere quiet to go to think. I started going to the village where Gran and Grandad used to live, sitting down by the river. I used to spend hours there, thinking about Hannah. Eventually, I ran out of thoughts, and once I got past the guilt of not being able to remember anything else, I started thinking about what could have been. All these thoughts just started flowing around in my head, so, one day I took my laptop with me and I started writing. To cut a long story short…I’ve written a book.”
“Oh, angel, that’s wonderful,” Susan says.
“I need to make a huge apology. Ryan…I may have killed you off. The story is about Hannah rebuilding her life and moving on.”
The look on Emma’s face as she says this tells me all I need to know about how scared she has been to tell me this. “Emma, it’s—”
“No, let me finish.” I nod at her to continue. “I’m sorry, but I think you should be thanking me because it was writing about Hannah moving on and finding someone new that helped me understand what’s been going on with you two, and it’s what Hannah would want. She loved you both and would want you to be happy. And if that’s toget
her, then so be it.”
“I don’t know what to say…thank you, I guess.”
“Can I read it?” Molly chips in excitedly. I know she’s as big a reader as Emma is, so I’m not surprised by her enthusiasm.
“I was hoping you would. I’ve only just finished typing the story, so it’s going to need quite a bit of editing. I can only imagine how many errors will be in it. But I was also hoping you’d help me with a cover design and with promotion when it’s done.”
“Of course I will,” Molly squeals as she gets up and runs around the table to hug Emma.
A thought hits me. He may not thank me for it later, but I’m sure he’ll be willing to help. “I’ve got a mate who’s an English teacher. I’m sure he’d read it for you to help edit it.”
“That would be amazing, thank you. And thank you all for understanding and being patient with me this year. I truly couldn’t have done it without you.”
Everyone has just about finished consoling Emma, who seems to be a bit overwhelmed after confessing what she’s been up to, when Dec pipes up. “While we’re at it, I’ve got news, too.”
“Are we ever going to get to the turkey?” Dave complains lightheartedly.
“Don’t worry, old man, you’re not going to starve to death anytime soon,” Dec deadpans as he waves his hand in the direction of his dad’s rather round belly. “So, as you know, I like to make money.” Lilly groans. “Thanks for the support, Lills! Anyway, I’ve started up my own surf school. Someone from uni introduced us to this little bay about an hour away from campus. It’s really up and coming with tourists, and the surf is insane. It’s early days, but it seems to be doing well.”
“My goodness, when did all our children become so successful?” Susan chimes in, looking like she could burst with pride.
Eventually, there’s enough of a break in the conversation that we can actually start dishing out the dinner. Dave makes a really touching speech for Hannah which has us all sobbing into our gravy, but soon the conversation resumes around Emma’s book and Dec’s business.
Falling For Ryan: Part Two Page 18