Worthy

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Worthy Page 13

by Lacey Carter Andersen


  I finally have my lamp back. I have the things inside that meant everything to me.

  So why am I so heartbroken?

  Because I needed revenge too? I look back up at Allie. She has tears running down her face, and Mr. Blake is holding her.

  Does she really love him? Does she care about him? Or is this all part of her game?

  The truth is, I don’t know. I wanted to destroy her. I wanted to help Mr. Blake. But it’s not like it was before. I don’t feel the way I did about him.

  Because of Owen, Evan, and Emmett.

  The security guards leave the stage, heading for the door, and I look at the brothers I’ve fallen in love with standing in front of the stage. They look…upset. Hurt.

  “Owen?”

  “Why didn’t you stop, Jade? Why didn’t you listen? We could have figured this out without making a scene.”

  “I didn’t want to lose my lamp,” I say, confused by how upset they are.

  “And you didn’t trust us enough to make sure that wouldn’t happen?” he asks, his jaw locking and his eyes closing.

  “Emmett?” I look at him in confusion. Why is Owen so mad?

  “Nice one, Jade,” Emmett says, and the flare of pure anger in his eyes makes my blood run cold. “You’ve got your lamp now. And we all got to stand with our friends and watch you declare your love for another man.”

  Every muscle in my body stiffens. “What? No—“

  “Are you fucking kidding me?” Emmett says, throwing his hands in the air. “Clearly we were just a means to an end. Tools to use to get the revenge you wanted!”

  “No, that’s not it!” I say.

  “Am I missing something?” He’s enraged. “Because we all got to stand here and listen to it. Listen to how angry you were at your friend for doing the exact same thing that you did.”

  “I told you guys why I was here,” I say, scrambling, trying to remember everything I said.

  “Yeah, you did,” he said. “We were just idiotic to think that we mattered to you, if even a little.”

  “You do!” I’m barely holding back tears.

  Emmett turns and walks away.

  Owen opens his eyes, and the hurt in his gaze is overwhelming before he turns and follows his brother.

  Now tears are running down my cheeks. I look at Evan.

  “You know I care about all of you.”

  His gaze holds mine. “I don’t know anything anymore. And, Jade? I hope it was worth it. You missed your test, and you lost us. But hell, you made sure no one will ever look at Allie the same…or you.”

  He turns to go.

  “You knew how important this lamp was to me!”

  He freezes. “And now you have it. So go sell the last thing your dad ever gave you and enjoy your life without magic.”

  The whole world feels like it’s crumbled beneath me.

  And then I sense someone standing in front of me.

  Glancing up, I see Allie.

  Her makeup is smeared. Her hair is a little messy. Beneath all of that, I get a glimpse of my friend. “I’m sorry, Jade, I really am.”

  “I hate you,” I tell her.

  She wraps her arms around her waist. “I know, and I get it, but I also think that you might hate yourself a little too. I think you always have. And I think that’s what all of this is about. You thought getting your lamp back would give you what you lost, but you’ll never get that life with your dad back. Even with money, none of it matters without love.”

  “Fuck off,” I say, brushing at the tears on my face.

  “Forgive yourself. If you’d stayed all those years ago, your dad still would have died.”

  “Shut up!” I shout at her.

  Maybe he wouldn’t have. Maybe If I had been there he would have lived. The thoughts shock me. But not just the thoughts, it’s how much it hurts when I realize that I have been angry at myself for all these years. I’ve blamed myself for going when my instincts told me something was wrong and that my father was scared. I've pictured myself begging him to leave with me, believing that maybe if he'd have listened and my life would have been different. If I’d only tried harder.

  “Your aunt was an asshole,” Allie says. “My family is messed up, but at least I have them. You haven’t had anyone in so long. You’re scared, and that’s okay.”

  “You don’t know me!” I argue, gasping in a breath, feeling light-headed.

  “I know you.” She stares at me. “I’m the thief and the liar, Jade. You never were. You just couldn’t see yourself. You couldn’t see that you were mourning someone, not something. Not your old life.”

  I look up and hold her gaze. “How do you know all that but not know how to be a friend?”

  She doesn’t look away. “I just figured you’d never forgive me, and that I don’t deserve your forgiveness, but maybe I could give you something. The truth.”

  “Just go,” I say, and my vision of her blurs as more tears fill my eyes.

  I listen as her heels clack away, and the doors to the room close behind her, leaving me alone.

  And then I start to bawl, so hard it rolls up from my stomach. My tears splatter the picture of my dad and my mom as I stare at it, feeling like someone has ripped my heart out.

  It isn’t about them. Is it? Is she right? Were the guys right? It couldn’t be that I miss being tucked in at night, or being kissed on the forehead. It isn’t that I miss being chased by my dad and laughing, or that I remember the smell of my mother’s perfume, or remember how her smile lit my soul.

  Is it?

  I wanted my lamp. I wanted money.

  Not them.

  So why don’t I feel better? I have everything I ever wanted. I have the lamp and the jewelry. I can sell it. I can live like the princess I was always meant to be.

  That’s what my father wanted for me.

  My father. I sob harder. My father loved me so much, and I loved him too. And someone killed him because of what he knew. And he sent me away because he wanted to keep me safe. And he did.

  But I amounted to nothing. I lived a shadowy life of misery.

  When he died, and I lived, I should have tried to live a better life. For him. I should have found a way to honor who he was. And who my mother was.

  Instead, I’m nothing. A woman with a lap full of wealth and an empty life.

  I’m absolutely worthless.

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Jade

  Three Months Later…

  Sweat dampens the edges of the papers I hold, but I don’t tuck them back into my new maid uniform. The pockets aren’t nearly as big as the ones I had in Dolly’s uniform, the one she took when she fired me, but that’s not the only reason I hold the papers. I hold them because I’m nervous.

  I’ve tried to talk to Owen, Evan, and Emmett almost every day since my meltdown at their auction house, but they’ve refused. I don’t know if they’ve blocked my number, but now they won’t open the gate for me at the auction house, or let me into their apartment.

  And somewhere in the past few months I realized that if I was ever going to get them back, I needed to show them that I deserved it. That I realized that I screwed up and that I haven’t been the kind of person they deserve.

  So I stopped coming over and calling a few weeks ago. I focused on my goals, and now I wanted to show them that I’d done something with my life. That I’d changed.

  Moving down the hall of their apartment building, I’m startled to find their door open. Realizing I might never get another chance, I rush inside and freeze in the doorway. All three brothers are standing in front of their window. Each of them dressed in their finest. And boy do they look fine.

  I remembered them being handsome, but now my jaw drops open. These guys are easily the most beautiful men I’ve ever seen. Owen wears a dark blue suit, his stubble gracing his handsome jaw, and his hair neat. His light blue eyes seem even brighter in the well-lit room. Emmett wears khaki pants and a button-up top with several buttons left op
en. His smile is dazzling, and it reaches those emerald eyes of his. And then there’s Evan. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him truly dressed up, but now he wears a black sports coat over a shirt with scrawling letters on it, and black pants.

  They’re all the way I remember them, but also not at all.

  Owen speaks loudly as he stares out the window. “The view from here is actually quite…” And then his gaze meets mine, and he freezes.

  All three look at where I stand, and the room goes still.

  “Okay,” I say, my heart racing. “I know you don’t want to talk to me. You’ve made that very clear, but I need to make a few things clear to you guys. I’m absolutely, totally, and completely in love with you. You were right about Mr. Blake. I didn’t really know him. I didn’t feel anything for him. He just represented the life I thought I wanted.”

  “Jade—“ Evan says.

  I cut him off. “And you guys were right about everything else. I didn’t want money. I didn’t want to sell the lamp. I just wanted that life I had with my dad. I wanted to be happy. I wanted to feel loved. That was the magic I was missing from life, and it’s what I had with you.”

  “Jade, listen—“ It’s Owen now, but if I let them stop me now I might never get the chance to tell them how I feel.

  “I miss you guys. I miss you guys so much it hurts. I think about you every day, and I replay that awful moment in my mind. I know how I sounded. I sounded like I was jealous Allie was with him, but I wasn’t. I just wanted to hurt her the way she hurt me. And you were right, that didn’t make me happy.”

  Walking into the room, I pass the couches and table and come to stand by the window with them. “I got my GED. I passed the test, and I was accepted into the community college for an accelerated business program. You made me realize that I’m worth something just the way I am. Instead of focusing on these outside things to bring me the happiness I always wanted, I have to work for them.”

  “You need to—“ Emmett begins, but there’s a smile on his face.

  “I didn’t sell the lamp or any of it. I didn’t just step into this life and try to be someone I’m not. I’m creating the life I always wanted. The only thing it’s missing is you.” I finally shove the papers back into the pocket of my apron. “I know I embarrassed you. I know taking another chance on me would mean letting your pride go about my public, stupid declaration, but please take another chance on me. I love you, I really do.”

  Then I stop talking, holding my breath. Waiting to see if by actually fighting for what I want, I might get them back, or if it’s too late. If I’ve lost everything.

  “Is that all?” Emmett says, and again his voice is amused.

  Is him finding this funny a good sign or a bad one?

  “Did I say I love you?” I ask.

  He raises a brow. “You did.”

  “Then, that’s all.”

  Owen clears his throat. “What we were trying to tell you is that we’re currently doing a live online show. A walkthrough of our apartment.”

  I turn slowly and see the laptop pointed at where they stand. Comments scroll down the side of the page, popping up every few seconds with people with different names. Some are rooting for them to take me back. Some of them are saying to cut me loose.

  My cheeks heat, and I look back at them.

  “That was embarrassing,” Evan says.

  I clench my hands together. “I publicly embarrassed you. I guess maybe now we’re even.”

  “Is that what you think?” Emmett says.

  I nod, holding his gaze.

  He walks past me to the computer and smiles into it. “First of all, we are going to take her back. Second of all, we don’t need an audience for this next part.”

  Then he closes the screen.

  “You forgive me?” I ask, hoping like crazy.

  Emmett looks at his brothers.

  I glance at them to see them smiling.

  “Maybe,” Emmett says. “But first I think you’ll have to work a little harder than that.”

  “Harder?” I ask, confused.

  Evan goes to the door of their apartment, closes it, and locks it. “You’re going to have to show just how sorry you are.”

  “How?” I say, willing to do anything.

  Owen’s the one to answer. “We’ve had three very dry, very lonely months. How about you start by making it up to us?”

  My jaw drops open. “You want sex?”

  Emmett laughs. “Always.”

  Sex? Hell, I was hoping like mad this would just end in them talking to me. The idea of getting back in their bed…well, my whole body seems to like that.

  “So you really forgive me?”

  They exchange another look.

  Evan answers, his voice a little husky. “I guess we’ll have to see just how much we forgive you.”

  This time, I laugh. “So, no sex no forgiveness?”

  Evan smiles. “Or maybe we already forgive you, and this is for your sake.”

  My nervousness fades, and I chew my bottom lip trying to look like I’m seriously looking at their offer as more than a playful way to get me into bed. “So this is all for my benefit?”

  “Of course,” Evan says.

  Moving closer, I put my hand on his muscular arm and look up to meet his gaze. “And there’s nothing at all in it for you?”

  He opens his mouth but no words come out.

  “Shit, man,” Emmett mutters. “Play it a little cooler.”

  When Emmett and Owen head for the bedroom, Evan squares his shoulders and follows after them. I turn and watch their nice asses for a second before I head for the bedroom. But inside, they just cross their arms as if waiting.

  “What?” I say. I kind of thought they’d be half-naked by now.

  Emmett grins. “We’re just waiting for the strip show.”

  I could refuse them. But what’s the point? After everything I put them through, the least they deserve is a strip show… that will end in exactly what I want.

  So, slowly, I start to remove my clothes, all the while feeling their gazes burning into me like flames. I’m down to my red bra and underwear when Owen mutters, “Screw it.”

  A second later, we’re kissing.

  I don’t know what I expected, but the feverish kisses and touches were not it. My guys are naked in record time, and Owen’s pulling me on top of him on the bed. They shed my underwear and bra, their hands everywhere.

  I’m breathing hard. “I’ve never had sex with more than one guy at a time.”

  Owen leans up. “Good.” Then he starts sucking my nipple.

  I gasp, and Evan tilts my head towards him, kissing me deeply, his tongue moving inside my mouth, tangling with my own.

  A shudder moves over my body. Hell, I hadn’t realized that I didn’t just miss them, I missed their touch too. And my body seems to agree, because I’m hot and bothered in an uncomfortable way.

  When I feel Emmett sliding his dick along my ass crack, I don’t even care. Anal has never been my favorite, but my body is ready to take these guys in any way they let me.

  When Owen reaches between us and grabs his length, angling it into my body, I shift to take him. He releases his cock, and I lower myself on top of him. Reaching the end, I moan and lean forward more, knowingly making things easier for Emmett.

  He seems to sense my surrender, kneeling on the bed behind me, pressing the tip of his cock into me from behind. For a second, I tense, but Owen strokes my breasts and moves gently inside me. I turn my head and see Evan near me, stroking himself slowly. The combination of Owen’s touch and seeing Evan so aroused increases my desire. And when Emmett reaches around to stroke my clit, I press back against him, letting his hard length sink deeper into my ass.

  At his hilt, we’re all breathing hard. My body feels tight. Almost uncomfortably so, but I’m also wet and ready, waiting to see what will happen next.

  They don’t disappoint. Evan’s dick slips into my mouth, and Owen and Emmett start thru
sting slowly. Owen’s hands on my breasts send waves of desire rolling through my blood, and Emmett’s expert touch on my clit has me overcome with need.

  I move between them, sucking harder and harder on Evan as he fucks my mouth, digging his hand into my hair

  I’m close to coming when I hear Emmett make a strangled sound. An instant later, his cum coats me from behind. For a long minute he continues to thrust into me before stopping, pulling out, and collapsing onto the bed beside us.

  Humming with need, I look up at Evan, willing my guys to help me orgasm. He pulls his cock out of my mouth and moves away from me. I almost protest but close my mouth when I feel him climb onto the bed beside me.

  My hard nipples are almost painful as Owen twists them, but it keeps me distracted as Evan slips into me from behind.

  His sounds of pleasure as he starts to fuck my ass makes my head spin, and then Owen begins to thrust in and out of my pussy again.

  I’m lost, lost to my desire. Only moments before I was climbing to my orgasm, then forced to stop. I was almost angry, being left needing and wanting, but now it feels like a blessing. Like I’m building up again, but higher this time.

  I grip Owen’s shoulders and meet their thrusts with my own. Both men groan, and I toss my head back, riding them harder and harder. So close. So close I can almost touch my orgasm.

  And then I come, and they do too. Waves of desire move through me so hard that I feel like I’m lost in the most beautiful storm.

  When I finally become aware of myself, I’m breathing hard. Sandwiched between two handsome men who I love. Staring into the eyes of another man, Emmett, as he lies beside me, his gaze worshipping.

  “Fuck, that was good,” I say.

  Evan laughs and pulls out my ass, then lies at Owen’s other side. “Good doesn’t even begin to describe it.”

  I rise up onto my elbows, staring at them. “So, in all seriousness, do you guys really forgive me?”

  Owen smiles. “We forgave you a while ago, but it was our pride that stopped us from pursuing you. When you stopped coming, we’d been worried that we lost you for good.”

 

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