Apple gazed knowingly at her sister. “Thank you, by the way.”
Jess blinked. “For what?”
“I saw how your hand trembled with Angelica's insults, how she turned everyone's horrified amazement into license to mock you, making you an object of contempt as opposed to... pity.” Solemn green eyes gazed deeply into Jess's own. “I know damn well what you are capable of when pushed. So thank you.”
Jess sighed. "She's just a child, Apple. At the end of the day, when all is said and done, Angelica is just a girl trying to survive this pit of vipers in the best way any girl can." She chuckled ruefully. "If this were Highrock, and she were proving herself with the blade, I would commend her victory over me and drink a toast in her honor, even as I trained my damnedest to best her in the next match. But this? I'm sorry, Apple. Frankly, I'm glad Lady Grimsly has determined me to be 'unfit for polite society.' It will feel better than words can say to be free of obligatory dresses, wandering about the grounds as I like, training with the guardsmen. Frankly, Apple, save for you, Juliana, and Rulia, I am almost pleased to be forbidden to speak to all the harridans attending this institution."
Apple pursed her lips into a frown. “That does rather suit you, doesn't it? Oh yes, but it also isolates you, making it all but impossible for you to form alliances of your own, leaving you even more firmly under Lady Grimsly's thumb, even while giving you the illusion of freedom. So long as you do whatever task she assigns you.” Apple sighed. “She is a bitter, nasty woman, but if she thinks to break you like a dog, she is a fool!”
Jess nodded. “She plans on giving me daily drudge-work I am sure, no doubt to humiliate and master me, with our family held hostage to my good behavior.”
Apple nodded. “But with your Delver's strength, I doubt she can force you to do anything too arduous, and if her demands are too outrageous, well, people will see.”
Jess smiled and nodded. “Much like they saw us return from the head disciplinarian's office.
Apple blinked, an incredulous smile quickly brightening her features. "By all that's holy, you planned that, didn't you? You wanted to walk straight back to quarters and not head to the infirmary, because you knew this route would take you right by the dining hall, and even if you had a hundred pairs of eyes gloating at your humiliation, you also had a hundred students bearing witness as to just how badly she had beaten you!"
Jess chuckled softly. “I was an idiot to goad her without knowing more, Apple. I didn't plan on her being quite so brutal, with such a strong hand against us. But once she gave us that card, I would have been a fool not to play it.”
Apple gazed curiously at Jess. “You didn't want to rest first? Or go to the healers to make sure nothing is broken?” She sighed. “Oh Jess, I know how strong you Squires are, but we really should get you looked at.”
Jess's smile was almost sad. “Trust me, Apple. It doesn't matter. My injuries? They are only skin deep.”
Apple paled and stilled. “What are you saying, Jess?”
Jess grimaced and looked away. "Even now, I think I am changed, sister," she admitted softly. "I can feel the delightful tingle of a chill autumn breeze, but like you once jested to Mother, my body no longer sickens with cold. I know, I've tried." she shook her head as Apple gazed on in horror. "My skin can feel the gentle caress of a feather or a lover's touch, and feel the sharp sting of a bruise or burn. At least I can still taste that sharp agony, and goodness knows I've deliberately burned myself more than once, just to make sure I'm still, well, me. But never have Geoffrey's or Father's blows ever done more than mark my skin and cause me pain. Never have my muscles been bruised or sore, not even when I run at a mad pace, racing across the fields late at night with a brilliant moon glowing like silver overhead, Twilight loping by my side. And I look back, and our grand manor is but a speck in the distance, and I so close to the nearest town that I can hear the singing from the local tavern."
Jess almost trembled with her smile. “Truly, Apple, save for the pain and pleasure I can still feel with my skin, the core of myself so infused with the magic of darkest Shadow that I shudder to think of what I am becoming, as if this life will soon be no more real to me than a waking dream.”
Apple gaze became one of fearful awe. "You burned yourself, Jess? Oh gods, Mother will be horrified! Where are the scars?" Apple paled, gazing carefully at Jess's bruised arms. "Jess, I see no scars, save for the old ones on your cheeks." Her sister shook her head in wonder. "Can you be cut? Can you even be hurt? You look an absolute mess, though, so you must still be..."
“Human?” Jess smiled sadly at her sister's start. “Yes, Apple. I can still be cut.” Her laughter turned bleak. “I should know. I cut myself deliberately with my own mithril blade, not that long ago. Slow and steady into the thigh, just to make sure I could still feel pain more than skin deep, despite Twilight's furious scolding. Just to make sure that I was, well, still human.”
Jess chuckled softly. "Blood still pumps through my veins, I am happy to say, and it did indeed hurt."
Apple winced. "Oh Jess, please tell me you didn't permanently injure yourself with that awful blade? Where is the scar? Where are any of these self-inflicted wounds?"
Jess sighed and looked away. “When I deliberately cut my leg, deeper than I had intended, for mithril blades are as sharp as hate itself, I felt more real, and more humbled, with blood pouring out and me grimacing and bandaging myself, than I had in some time. As foolish as I had at any time since our recent meeting with Lady Grimsly.” The both chuckled ruefully at that, before Jess's gaze turned solemn once more. “Apple? with but a single night's sleep, it was gone. No trace of the wound remained.”
Apple swallowed. "That's not natural, Jess. Not at all."
Jess shrugged. “I know. But at least, this way, all the girls saw my bruises while they were still fresh and visible for all to see, even if the injuries were only skin deep.” Jess smiled. “Except to my pride, of course. In that alone, Grimsly struck a telling blow.”
Apple nodded, her solemn gaze once more resting upon Jess. “Thank you, Jess. Thank you for taking it, for not doing anything... awful, in the end.”
Jess chuckled ruefully. “It was just punishment for playing the fool, I am sure Eloquin would say. And now, at least, we know that we have active spiders here, deliberately spinning webs about our family for their own ends. We just have to figure out who all the players are, and what their end game happens to be. In the meantime? If I can get them to lower their guard while mucking about with the common folk, free of all dresses and asinine classes? That suits me just fine.”
Apple's smile turned sad. “What about Rulia?”
Jess sighed, thinking back to Rulia's original gaze of horror when Jess had made it back to quarters, a look that too soon became one of bitterest disappointment, for all that she had tried to hide it with a smile. "I think it's best she steer clear of me, at least for now. I wouldn't want her to get on the bad side of Grimsly, now that we know what a mad little bat she is. Frankly, Apple, I'm just glad Rulia's willing to look after Juliana for me, lest she suffer repercussions at the hands of her roommate or any of Angelica's vindictive friends."
Apple nodded. “She did agree to that,” Apple said. “But I saw her eyes when you told her you didn't want her to get hurt. I think, I think those words hurt her all in themselves.”
Jess grimaced. “What was I supposed to do, Apple?”
Apple sighed. “Honestly, I don't know. Let's just hope things make a little bit more sense on the morrow. Get some rest, Jess, I have letters to write.”
Jess paled and swallowed. Apple chuckled softly. “Don't worry, Jess. I'm not throwing you under the barge. But Mother has to know what's going on. Look at it this way. You suffered a hell of a lot to coax those ugly little truths from Lady Grimsly. We would be fools not to let our family know.”
Jess grimaced, but nodded. “You are right, Apple. Write your report, but for gods' sakes, keep it well hidden. I sure as hell wouldn't place it
with the regular post.”
Apple nodded. "I know, sister. Believe me, I know." She frowned over her lines, carefully going over her report. "Don't worry, Jess. We'll get through this, somehow. We always do."
But Jess was already asleep.
Mistress! I sensed your distress. Shall I return?
Is your scouting done?
Sadly no, my queen. Our enemies have devised convoluted schemes indeed, and all are cagey and closemouthed, so it has gone far slower than I would have liked.
Jess felt herself smile in that strange realm between life and death, reality and dream. I have a name, Twilight. A player of the game of Houses who seeks to manipulate our clan for her own ends. I doubt she is working alone, and whoever her allies are, they are of sufficient potency to persuade the Crown itself to send Apple and me to the Royal Ladies Academy, and under her thumb.
What is her name?
Lady Grimsly, the head disciplinarian of this blasted academy.
A thoughtful pause. Interesting. I shall see what I can ascertain. Will you be safe, my queen?
Jess chuckled silently. As safe as ever. She placated a distant sense of alarm. Fear not, beloved one. I underestimated my enemies' hand, but forced her to reveal at least one of her cards at the cost of a few bruises. You know as well as I that I shall be fine with the morning sun.
Be careful, Jess. If anything happens to you... I will not forgive those responsible.
For all that she was immersed in the deepest of dreams, this chilled Jess far worse than Lady Grimsly's hate-filled gaze glimpsed in the lucid light of day. Do nothing, my beloved Twilight. Promise me you will do nothing! Dawn is too fragile a place to bear the weight of your wrath once more.
A weighty pause. Very well, my mistress. But if you have need of me, I shall make all haste to be by your side.
And I shall welcome you then, as always. Farewell, Twilight, and good luck.
Be safe, my queen.
18
“Jess? Someone is at the door for you.”
Jess rubbed her groggy eyes and got up with a deep yawn, feeling refreshed and invigorated for the split second before the day prior settled upon her. She flinched at sudden memory of a hundred fierce blows, for all that she had stood stoically at the time. She braced herself, checking areas of flesh that had been beaten with fierce resolve but hours before, only to find herself utterly free of injury or pain.
Jess caught her sister's concerned gaze and nodded. “I'll get it, Apple.”
Strangely, Apple looked far worse than Jess felt; pale and exhausted, as if she had hardly slept a wink. She carefully looked Jess over, shaking her head in relieved disbelief. "You weren't kidding, Jess. You were battered pretty badly yesterday, such that I thought some of your claims sheer bravado. But... by the gods, not a bump or bruise, anywhere. And I could have sworn that madwoman had done all she could to hurt you."
Jess's smile didn't reach her eyes. “She tried and failed. She is lucky, Apple. Luckier than she knows.”
Apple trembled and looked away. “Please, Jess,” she whispered. “Please...think of our family.”
Jess nodded. "I do, Apple. Every day." She then turned toward the door after throwing on fresh attire loaned to her by Rulia, their builds remarkably similar, even if Rulia's tunic and doublets were just a bit tight around the shoulders compared to Jess's own.
Before her stood the same young waif as the day before, blinking up at Jess like a startled dear, fighting not to bolt. “My lady, here are your instructions.” After depositing the folded missive into Jess's hands, the girl scampered off before Jess could say a word.
Jess opened the letter and frowned at its contents.
“What does it say?” Apple asked.
Jess smiled. "Well, Lady Grimsly is smart enough not to pen the insults she had so favored me with the night before. It merely says to muck out the left wing of stables as penance by the end of the week, and that you are to bring up my meals until my fever breaks, as she put it."
Apple smirked. “Perhaps she is having second thoughts about how badly she beat you. At the very least, she doesn't want people to see how ugly you might look, once all the bruises she thinks she gave you would normally yellow and blacken.”
Jess smiled grimly. “Yes, that might come back to bite her at some point, all her other maneuverings aside. No doubt she had thought I would scurry and hide my head in shame yesterday, not walk bold as brass through the dining hall so that all could see the work of their head disciplinarian, whatever they thought of me.”
“And even there you challenged her.” Apple sighed and shook her head. “That, at least, might work to our favor. But please, Jess, for gods' sakes, challenge her no further!”
Jess dipped her head. “I'm not intending to, for the moment, as I don't mind caring for horses.” Jess grinned. “Horse manure actually makes good fertilizer if treated right, and when I'm done, it's off to the barracks.”
Apple nodded. “I will make sure to bring up some food for you and leave them in quarters so that you may eat, after you bathe.”
Jess gently squeezed her sister's shoulder. "Thank you, Apple. And I hope that things aren't too bad for you because of, well, what happened."
Apple surprised Jess with her fierce hug. "What matters is that we get through this, Jess. Together."
Sharing a warm smile Jess was soon off, and when all was said and done, she decided that spending the day helping a grateful stablemaster clean his stalls, and a surprisingly furtive gardener compost wood chips, leaves, dirt, and manure together into what would soon become rich soil, was a far more satisfying use of her time than listening to the monotonous voices of professors lecturing about topics she loathed.
She had finished the afternoon feeling curiously fulfilled, the snide comments she had received from sniping students gossiping loudly before her as she made her way to the bathing area a small price to pay for the freedom to spend most of the day as she chose.
“The servants' baths for you. You aren't fit to bathe with the likes of us, mule.”
Jess smiled coldly at the suddenly pale-faced girl who had insulted her so boldly to her face. The willowy student swallowed and stepped back, almost tripping on the damp stones by her bare feet before Jess snapped forward to catch the suddenly screaming girl before she could do herself harm.
“By the gods, did you see how fast she moved?” one girl whispered.
“I hear she is a killer. Blood on her hands. I would not want to cross her,” whispered another
The girl she had rescued from an impromptu fall whimpered in Jess's steely grip.
“Be careful, girl. These stones are slippery. You could do yourself an injury.”
Jess said not a word further as she slowly eased the shaking girl to her feet before turning around and making her way down to the servants' baths, more than ready to react to any threat, yet save for the solemn gazes of numerous tired looking servitors cleaning themselves as best they could, no one troubled her in the least, or even dared to speak a word.
“So I hear someone had a productive day.”
Jess smiled even as she slowly pulled herself free of sleep's seductive embrace, gazing with pleased surprise into Rulia's warm smile. “Rulia.” Jess immediately flushed, looking away, before Rulia gently lifted Jess's chin, forcing their eyes to meet once more. “I'm sorry, Rulia. I just didn't think it would be fair to you if we met right now, what with that damned disciplinarian threatening to have any student who dares to befriend me declared a social outcast.”
Rulia gently pressed her lips against Jess's own. Jess shivered in sudden delight, waking up fully, kissing her lover back.
"A pox on all those bastards," Rulia huskily declared. "I'm as ready to leave this school as not. No one has any leverage on my family here, and I'll stay only so long as it suits me." Tenderly, she stroked Jess's cheek. "To be quite frank, what suits me most is to be right here by your side, for just so long as you want me."
Jess felt something
squeeze tightly in her chest. She forced away a bittersweet tear, holding Rulia close. “Thank you, beautiful one. It hurt, you know, pushing you away.”
Rulia chuckled throatily. “Then don't push me away.” Their lips touched once more, a gentle kiss turning passionate, and Jess's heart began to race. “So what are we doing tomorrow?” Rulia asked a breathless moment later.
Jess smiled. “Mucking out stables.”
Her lover raised an eyebrow, grinning approvingly. “Well then, let's get our rest, and give that stablemaster the cleanest stables he's ever seen!”
Jess chuckled softly at that, holding Rulia close, more grateful than she dared say allowed to have the beautiful girl she adored so steadfastly beside her.
“But there is a price for my services, sweet Jess,” she teased.
Jess smiled. “And what would that be?”
“Let me show you,” Rulia whispered, before proceeding to do that in exquisite detail, until they both collapsed, shuddering with sweetest bliss.
Jess gently stroked her lover's sweat-soaked hair, even as they drifted off together. “If I was ever to fall in love with a girl...”
Rulia's gaze turned soft, and she smiled. “Go to sleep, beautiful one. We have stables to muck out on the morrow.”
And Jess did.
19
"My lady, truly, you have done more than enough already. We may be shorthanded, but we would never think to trouble you with such triflings." This apologetically said from the burly stablemaster who had already done his best to cajole Jess into relaxing and taking her ease, assuring her that he would say she had more than done her part, should anyone ask, and that no disciplinarian had ever troubled anyone working in the stables for so long as he could recall, save for demanding that their mounts be made ready at a moment's notice.
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