by Nana Malone
She laughed. "It's fine. How are you? Those assholes. What's happening?"
"I wish I could tell you. But I can't stay here too long. I just wanted to make sure I saw you."
"You’ve got to tell me what's going on Jessa. Right now everything feels crazy."
"Right now, everything is crazy. But I promise we'll talk about this. You just get well, okay?"
Because we were on a time clock with nowhere to turn, I had to leave my best friend behind. Praying she understood.
25
Roone
Back at the hotel, I had to be patched up. Which was humiliating. I’d had my ass saved by Penny. I'd been so busy kicking the ass of the guy who tried to grab us, or rather tried to grab who he thought was Jessa, I had let my emotions get in the way, and I'd missed the guy coming up behind me. My queen had literally saved my ass, which was just humiliating. God, I should have known better than to let my emotions take over, but because they’d threatened the woman I loved, I hadn't been able to see through my fucking anger. Which was just stupid and dangerous. I was an idiot, and the queen had almost been hurt because of it.
I needed to be more careful, more aware. It was hard to remember, fucking impossible to remember, but I needed to. Thank God, Penny had been there. Which was just confusing. Seriously, who needed their queen to save them?
She came up to me and said, "That looks like it hurts."
I tried to hold back the wince but that didn't help. "Well, maybe if you hadn't been so busy kicking ass you would have noticed that arse-wipe coming for us."
"I did notice. I just was busy doing other things."
"Yeah. About to get your ass kicked."
She laughed. "You missed a perfect shot to the groin. You should have seen it."
I sent my gaze over to Sebastian for help. He just shrugged. "Watch your six man. And also, don't take my wife out."
I shrugged. "She volunteered."
When Jessa and Ariel walked in, I darted around Trevor, who was still trying to add the bandage to my stupid cut. He’d already sutured it, but I was in no mood to wait for the bandage. I needed to hold Jessa.
"God this is my fault. I should have listened." She glanced around at everyone. "Is everyone okay?"
She didn't even hug me.
I scowled.
When she finally walked over to me, her gaze searched my face. "I'm going to hug you. I just need a second I just need to thank Penny and the team."
That I'd allow. "Okay."
When she did wrap her arms around me, she held on tight. "My God, I'm being stubborn, aren't I? I can't stay here."
Everyone else in the room was silent. They understood what was happening. They knew what the truth of it was. Until we handled the threat, she couldn't stay here. I'd been tiptoeing around the fact. Trying to not tell her what she could and couldn't do and let her come to her own conclusions.
"I have to leave."
I looked back at her and nodded slowly. "Well, for the time being."
"So my life, all this that I've built, I have to leave it behind."
What was I supposed to say? ‘I'm sorry baby, it sucks, but you don't ever get to come back?’ No man wanted to say that to the woman he loved. But I needed to say it because it was the truth. "We can protect you in the islands. All of us. And maybe Penny won't take such stupid risks."
Penny decided not to comment from the peanut gallery, even though I knew it was killing her. Jessa blinked up at me. "I'm ready. Let's go. But, since they've already tried to hurt Chloe, should we bring her with us?"
I glanced over Jessa's head at Sebastian, who shrugged. He'd be willing to protect her in the Winton Isles, but she might not want that. "Listen, we can, but you have to remember she has her life here. She might not want to leave."
"Well, we have to try. We can't just stand here and pretend like she's going to be okay. Those people tried to grab Penny off the street."
She wasn't wrong. "I know. Just understand that we are going to do our best to convince her, but she's not obligated. She doesn't have to come with us."
"We just need to be very persuasive, because after seeing what just happened, there’s no way I can just walk away from her. Those people were savages."
"Okay, we'll do our best. I promise."
And then she did the one thing I needed her to do. She wrapped her arms around me and settled in. Just knowing she was safe made my whole body relax. I planned to never let her out of my sight again. I didn't care what had to happen. The idea of losing her nearly killed me. That's what it meant to be in love.
Well then, so be it, because she was mine, and I would do anything it took to protect her.
Jessa
"I still can't believe any of this."
Chloe sat in her flat staring at me as I laid out the rest of the story. "I know. It's crazy."
"So all this time, you've been a princess?"
I shrug. "I don't know what I am. Technically, I guess maybe I'm a princess. Officially, not even. No matter what, I'm still just Jessa."
"But some crazy people are after you."
I nodded slowly. "Well, when you say it like that yeah, crazy people are after me."
"Jesus Christ, Jessa."
"But listen, all I want is to keep you safe. I'd like you to come with me."
Chloe raised her brows. "With you. To the Winston Isles? To the Caribbean? For a holiday?"
"I guess, but maybe we’ll stay longer than for just a holiday. You're always looking for new adventure, and I don't feel good about leaving you here. Sebastian said that he'll give you a guard, but it'll be easier if you're just with me and I know you're safe."
Chloe chewed her bottom lip. "Listen, babe. I know you don't like change."
I laughed at the understatement. "Uh, yeah. Who does?"
"But I can't just drop everything. You're about to embark on a whole new adventure. A whole new life. You have to embrace it and do this. I am so proud of you to no end. You have taught me everything I know, but I can't just drop everything and move to the Caribbean."
I knew she'd say that. I knew it. But I still had to try. "Chloe, at least maybe come for a few days. A week. Until we can figure out who these assholes are that are trying to kill me."
"Honey, I'm just going to get in the way. You've got a whole new life with a whole new hot-ass man. You can't have me tagging along."
"You sure about that? Because I feel like I can. Chloe, this is a dangerous situation. There are people who have vanished the moment they've given me information, there was a fire at Hope House, and now someone t-boned you with a car. I just—I’m terrified. I'm scared for the people I love. Please just come with me. Even if it's just for a little bit, I just want to be able to protect you."
"Okay, I get it. You're scared. Hell, now that you've told me, I'm scared for you. But I can't uproot my life. How's this idea… I'll take off for a week. I'll go see my cousin in France. Your gorgeous brother can feel free to send someone with me to, you know, protect my body."
I had to chuckle. " Why are you so brave? Braver than me?"
"Well, I'm not brave. Matter of fact, I'm insane. But this is your life, and you need to live it. And you can't be worried about me. I know that if I let you, you will obsess about my safety. So, we're not going to do that. You're going to go live your life, be a princess. I'm going to come and visit you occasionally, and it's going to be awesome. It’ll be great, and we're going to enjoy each other for a while, and then I'm going to come home. I think you and I both know that your whole life has been about other people. If I come with you, you have to take care of me. And while I would love for you to take care of me, I have to live my own life too. You know?"
I hated that she was making sense. "But Chloe, someone tried to hurt you because of me. I'm responsible."
"Oh Jessa. You are responsible for no one else but you, and that's about all you can manage. I watched you be responsible for your father, responsible for everyone. Evan acted like a twat for year
s, and somehow you put that on yourself. It's not your responsibility. He's a grown-ass man. He stalked you, acted way creepy, and still you thought somehow that was your fault? That's insane."
"I didn't think it was my fault, I just—"
She put up her hand. "No. Not listening. You get to be a princess. I could not be happier for you. I'm so proud of you. So you go do that and don't worry about me. For once, live life how you want to live it."
"I want to live it with my bestie."
"You get mad respect for that, love. But I can't come with you on this journey. It’s not my place."
"I hate this. I hate that I have to walk away."
"I know. It's not really what you do, but you’ve got to do it this time. Otherwise, you’re never going to know what kind of life you would have led. Okay?"
"You're my best friend."
"I know, so let me be a best friend. Let me be the one to tell you that you've taken care of too many people. Maybe it's time someone took care of you. Maybe it's time someone paid attention. Maybe it's time someone did what you needed. Let that gorgeous man of yours be in charge. I know, it's not real feminist. But you deserve someone taking care of you. For once."
"I don't even know what to say."
"Well, how about for starters you say I love you. I'll miss you."
I was going to cry. I sniffled and swiped at my nose. "How about I say come visit real soon."
Chloe grinned. "You know, that, I think I can manage."
I stood and squeezed her hand. My guard was waiting outside the door for me. They were also ready and waiting to protect Chloe for me. “I’ll see you soon.”
As I walked away from the only real family tether I had to London, I pulled out my phone to sever the last thread. The resignation letter had been sitting in my drafts for days.
But now I finally had the courage to hit send.
26
Jessa
Leaving was harder than I thought. I don't know why I thought it would be easy, I just did. You know, move to a Caribbean island, become a princess. Clearly, I did not think these things through. It was all a lot. That room I'd been given when I'd first turned up in the islands hardly compared to the room I was given now. It was a suite, right next to Roone's. And it was three times the size of my flat in London. I had my own balcony, that coincidentally connected to Roone's. Lucky that. Funny thing, I could still work for London Lords from there with the agreement that I would fly back to London whenever we needed face-to-face meetings. But I could handle most of it from the islands. Sebastian and Lucas and Roone thought of everything. There was something so crazy about my life being managed for me that I didn't even know how to deal with it.
Penny was great. She was actually fantastic, and I adored her. Every time I had one of those moments where I thought I was going to panic from all the changes and all the differences, Penny was right there. Turning up to find out how I was or wanting to take a walk. It had been three days. Three days of my whole life being turned upside down.
Just like when you were 10. Or 12, or 12 again, 14, 15, 15, 15, 16. 17. It was like all those times my father had moved us in the middle of the night or when I’d gone to bed thinking everything was fine and the next morning I’d wake up to find our meager bags packed. Everything was just like that. Roone had wanted me to be able to bring everything from my flat. But honestly, all I needed were my photos, the one of me and my mother, and a few changes of clothes. Nothing much. I also brought along some sketches my father had done. But that was it.
When I'd turned up for the flight with so little in hand, Sebastian eyed me wearily. "This it?"
I nodded and told him that ‘If I couldn't carry it, it wasn't worth bringing.’
The furrow in Sebastian's brow had been somehow sad to watch. Because he had no idea what I meant and no idea why I even felt that way. I wasn't sure what was sadder though, because Lucas seemed to know exactly what I meant. He simply nodded, grabbed my bag, and handed it to one of the luggage handlers. That was that.
Luckily, even though Chloe refused to join me, Ariel was there, Bryna and Jinx too, so there were at least a few familiar faces. Along with Penny, they were at the ready to fill my social calendar.
But I barely saw Ariel if I was being honest. I knew she had a job to do, including finding her father, so that was that. I knew eventually I'd work it out and figure out what in the world to do. I just needed to get used to being here, and I needed to prepare to meet with the Regents Counsel pretty immediately. It seemed they were deadly serious about the whole princess thing.
I knew my brothers were kind of a big deal. They were a prince and a king, but I didn't think the monarchy was that serious. It wasn't like any of those crazy fairytales where I could just walk through a looking glass and be like, ‘I'm a princess.’ Despite the support of my new family, it was weird.
As I was working on some of the upcoming events for London Lords, there was a knock on my door, and I frowned. I didn’t expect to see Roone. He, unfortunately, was back at work, and he was not on my personal detail. Now that we were back in the islands, I had a whole team. Seven men to be exact. Scratch that. Six men and one woman, but she wasn't nearly as fun as Ariel. I put my laptop down and darted to the door. Even though it was a palace, old habits died hard. I searched the peephole and found someone unexpected on the other side. Lucas.
I opened the door with a smile. "Hey, am I late for some appointment?"
He shifted on his feet. "No. Sorry, I should have called or texted. I don't know, whatever the kids are doing these days. But I just wanted to spend some time with you."
I didn't know why, but a slow grin spread over my lips. "Really?"
He nodded. "I know in these things Sebastian is usually primary. He's the one in charge and tells us what to do, where to go, how to be. But I actually know the position you're in. That awkward what-do-I-do-now feeling. And I know you're probably freaking out about the Regents Council meeting."
"Oh my God, all the studying, the protocols, the who's-who, the faces. I keep thinking about the pictures and how people on Instagram never look the way they do in real life. You know they put their best face forward with their pictures and things, and then you're left trying to be like ‘is that you?’"
Lucas chuckled a little. "Exactly. But why don't you take a break from all that. Let's go play on the beach."
"What?"
He nodded. "There's a path straight down to the beach, completely protected. And the armed guard outside can follow us."
"How come you don’t have an armed guard?"
"That took some time. Plus, I ran away from my guards once or twice or… you know what, that doesn't matter."
I chuckled. "Oh, so you're an escape artist?"
"Well this one time, I found out some stuff, and I had a hard time dealing with it.”
I stared at him. "You know I feel like I'm going to need to hear this story in its entirety."
"I'll tell you the whole sordid story."
For the first time since arriving in the islands, I felt a little more normal. Like this life could be my life. Like I could make this work.
For the first hour or so, Lucas regaled me with stories of the shenanigans he'd pulled, running away from his guard, repelling down the side of a building to make an escape and protect Bryna. That was complete insanity. But then he posed a question that, so far, no one else had really asked. Even Roone. "So, how are you feeling?"
I had no idea how to answer that. "Um, worried, scared, anxious. Trepidatious. All the stresses."
He laughed. "That's normal. I just wanted to tell you that I think it's amazing that we all have each other. And I know it's weird because you have this family that doesn't really feel like family yet. But we will. And if you need anything, I'm here. And you know, cut Sebastian some slack. He's actually a pretty great brother. He just feels like he has to have the weight of the whole world on his shoulders and protect everyone, so sometimes he doesn't listen the best. But he'
s trying to do the best he can. Which is why Penny's important. Penny keeps everything on the rails."
"Yeah, that makes sense. She's great, and I actually really like her a lot. I just hope I can live up to all this."
"That's just it, Jessa. All you have to do is be yourself. In this place, there are going to be people who try to make you feel like you're not enough. You know, because dear old Dad was sticking his wick in other wells and all that. In the end, he did want us. He did want to be part of our lives, but he wasn't allowed to be. So now, we get to be part of this family. And don't let them make you feel like any less."
And there, with the sand underneath my feet and the ocean lapping up over my toes, I felt at home for the first time. I was exactly where I belonged.
27
Roone
I wasn't sure why I was nervous. After all, this was just Sebastian.
Yeah, just Sebastian, the current king, not to mention the big brother of the woman you're sleeping with.
Sebastian leaned against the billiards table and gave me a shrewd, narrow-eyed gaze. "What's wrong? You look like you swallowed something bad and/or experimentally jammed a stick up your ass. In which case, no judgment."
"Shut up, you twat."
My best mate grinned at me, looking younger than he had in over a year. "Well, you're the one making the face. I just call it how I see it. What's the matter? You did what you were supposed to do. You brought my sister home. You should look thrilled."
"I am thrilled. We can keep her safer here."
Sebastian nodded. "But there's still a threat?"
I nodded. "Yeah, that's unsettling. There's something else too."
I love her. "I talked to my brother while I was in London."
Sebastian's brows drew up. "What? Way to keep that secret."
"Well, we had our hands full with more pertinent things at the time."