by Susan Ward
“You have?” He sounded shocked. “How? That’s not public information. The threat status of the royal family is never given out to the media.”
I held my cell up to his face and shook it. “Every morning I get a security briefing from Black Star. Right there in my in-box. Every member of my family does. I have since I was eighteen and started traveling without my parents. Do you think your family is the only one on the planet subject to threats from the loons out there? I’ve lived with this my entire life. Why do you think my parents’ estate has such high-level security?”
His anxious amber gaze lifted from the phone. “Then why didn’t you bloody well tell me? It’s been tearing me apart keeping all the threats from you since we got here.”
“I probably should have told you, but I was waiting for you to open up to me.” I turned off my phone and tossed it on the bed. “You can’t protect me from everything, Damon. Stop trying to. We live in an ugly world, but that doesn’t mean we can’t exist in our happy reality. It doesn’t mean we can’t choose what’s important to us. And letting fanatics terrify me isn’t important to us.”
“God, you’re remarkable,” Damon gushed, crushing me to his chest. “I love you. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have doubted my cheeky girl could handle the nonsense of my life.”
“No, you shouldn’t have,” I agreed cheekily. “But I suppose that’s part of being an arrogant prince, being high-handed over everything and trying to control events rather than having them control you.”
He laughed, lavishing kisses across my face. “I can be a smidge arrogant at times. But only for the best causes.”
“There is nothing beyond these walls that can hurt us, Damon. Not if we don’t allow it to. Not if we love.”
I felt him swallow hard, and for some reason there was a light tremor to his arms. “Not if we love,” he agreed, and for a moment it felt as though he was afraid again.
“Is there anything else you haven’t told me?”
His arms grew fiercer around me. “No, love.”
“Then let’s have our nap before dinner, Damon. I really do need a bit of sleep.”
I shook off my mood and suspicions. It was only the heaviness of the moment and how much we loved each other that I was feeling. I was positive that Damon would never tell me an outright lie, and I sank back on the bed so Damon could hold me while I drifted off to sleep.
Chapter Seventeen
Khloe
The Past
THE NEXT MORNING, for some inexplicable reason, Damon felt distant from me. He acted like everything was normal; I was quite positive it wasn’t, though there was nothing about his manner I could pinpoint as a reason to feel that way.
As we sat cross-legged on the massive four-poster bed, with a roaring fire blasting heat through the room, he was unusually quiet, and it unnerved me. We felt off, and my own insecurities quietly took over my thoughts. Peeking up at him from my plate, I attempted to find something on his face or in his body language to confirm this.
I couldn’t isolate a single moment, and in fact, Damon had been wonderful from the moment we’d woken, as loving and attentive as I’d grown to expect. Our day was unfolding in a familiar routine that I’d come to think of as us.
We’d snuggled together in bed watching the dawn through the massive picture window. When the world beyond our bedroom was bright with light, he’d gone and gotten our breakfast tray himself. There’d been a box wrapped elaborately in silver and lavender next to my plate—that’s how I knew it was a Saturday—and he’d gently held my cheeks as I stared in and he waited me for to tell him what I saw.
He was being tender and romantic, but the nagging unrest in me wouldn’t go away.
“Are you still angry about yesterday?” I asked. “Is that why you’ve been kind of distant since we got up?”
“Angry?” There was an edge to his voice that took me by surprise. He reached over and set his hand atop mine. “God, Khloe. How could you wonder that after the night and morning we’ve just had?”
“You’re really quiet, like you’re lost in your own thoughts, and that’s unlike you.”
“Even I run out of things to jabber on about.” His charming smile flashed before he laughed in a self-deprecating way. “I would have thought you’d consider that a welcome break.”
I scrunched up my mouth and twisted it to one side. “Nope, I like jabbering Damon better.”
“Then I better think of something fast to jabber on about,” he teased. He reached for the coffee carafe and filled our cups.
I sank back against the pillows and stared at him. My gaze lowered to his plate—he’d only picked at it—then I returned my narrowed gaze to him. His thoughts were definitely claimed by something.
Hmm. Was there something else I didn’t know about, or could it be something I’d done?
I searched my brain. Then it occurred to me: Yesterday I’d taken Cody’s side over his, and internally I winced. I broke our pact to always be on the same side, and in typical Damon fashion he didn’t call me out on it. But, yep, he was bothered by it. There was no mistaking that.
I rolled forward from the pillows and settled close to him. “You try too hard sometimes to be the good guy. You need to stop it. I can’t stand it when there’s pulsing tension in a room and everyone pretends it’s not there. All that does is make my imagination run wild wondering what’s wrong. Telling me you’re pissed off at me when you are won’t make my illness worse. It’s okay to argue, to yell, and it’s better to clear the air than not to. It makes me so uncomfortable when you don’t do that. In my family, we live our emotions; we don’t pretend we don’t have any. If you’re angry, then admit it so we can talk about it, and I’ll stop feeling so awful.”
He looked up from the tray and frowned. “I can’t imagine why you feel awful. We’ve just passed a lovely morning. I’m not angry, and there’s nothing to talk about. Well, there wasn’t until that comment that suggests I don’t live my emotions and prefer to pretend that I don’t have any.”
“Sorry. Let me correct that one quickly. You live your emotions, but you become completely bottled up when you’re trying to keep something from me.”
I lifted my brows.
His lowered.
He climbed from the sheets and collected our tray. “Any particular reason you’re trying to pick a fight today, love? Is this you doing something bad so I can dominate you later? I certainly hope that’s what this is.”
“Changing the subject to sex.” I shook my head. “I’m onto you, Damon.”
He laughed softly and dropped a kiss on my nose. “What you are is quite exasperating today, KK.”
I scrunched up my nose at him, and he headed for the door.
“I’m sorry,” I called out as he struggled to turn the knob and not drop our dishes. “I took Cody’s side yesterday, and I was wrong to do that. I should have waited until we were alone then told you how irrationally you were behaving and that I wouldn’t allow you to fire my friend. I was right, but I should have waited until we were somewhere private not to be on your side. Can you just admit you’re annoyed about that so we can move on?”
He glanced over his shoulder at me, richly amused. “That’s the most unique apology I think I’ve ever heard. You don’t have a lot of experience saying you’re sorry, do you? It’s a good thing I’ve completely forgotten yesterday. Or rather I had forgotten the unpleasant part until you mentioned it. I’m not angry. You don’t need to apologize. We don’t need to move on, except me with these dirty dishes. Are you sorry enough to climb out of bed and help me open the door?”
I sprang from the blankets and crossed our bedroom. Instead of doing as he asked, I leaned back against the wood, blocking his exit. “Admit you’re irritated with me and I’ll open the door. It’s good for our relationship that we always express exactly how we’re feeling. You’re irritated. Say it.”
“I wasn’t before this began, but I’m starting to
be. Does that suffice?”
I growled in frustration, but then Cody’s ringtone blasted from the night table: I love the nightlife, I got to boogie, on the disco round, oh yeah.
The music cut off, and Damon’s expression changed to amusement. “That is the most bizarre selection for Cody. You’ve read the lyrics before, haven’t you? People get them wrong. She doesn’t say disco hound even if that’s what people think. Though I can’t imagine why you’d think disco hound would fit Cody.”
I rolled my eyes. “I don’t think that, and trust me, I know the lyrics. It’s a private joke and a great song.”
“I’m sure it’s a humorous story. You can tell it to me when I get back from the kitchen.”
“See. There you go. This is another habit you have when you’re trying not to be open with me: changing the subject.”
I love the nightlife, I got to boogie, on the disco round, oh yeah.
“Why don’t you open the door then answer your phone, Khloe? He’s robocalling. It may be important.”
“Fine. But I’m not through discussing this, Damon.”
I stepped out of his way and pulled back the door. Then I scrambled to the bed and swiped open my phone. Collapsing back against my pillows, I said in a rush, “God, I’m having the weirdest morning. What do you want?”
“Just checking in. You didn’t text me last night. I was worried you two were still fighting. Everything’s all right with you? Damon was a bit out there yesterday. I wanted to make sure you were OK.”
“He wasn’t out there,” I chided defensively. “He’s been worried over a lot of junk about his family, and it came out in the wrong way. Regrettably, all over you. But he knew he was wrong, and I know he’s sorry. And of course I’m OK. We’re all good here.”
“He seemed pretty pissed at me yesterday, Khloe. But I didn’t get a text from him telling me to pack, so I assumed the issue of me leaving was resolved.”
I raked my fingers across the top of my head, my fingers not finding hair, but it was a habit to brush it from my face. “Consider it over and done with.”
“Well, that’s something.”
I pursed my lips. “What’s wrong?”
He exhaled loudly. “I don’t know, Khloe. Things haven’t been good with me and Gideon since we got here. I’m thinking maybe I should take up Damon’s offer and leave the ranch.”
“No. You can’t. I won’t let you quit. What happened?”
“Nothing. That’s the problem. It’s like I don’t matter to him anymore. I’d think maybe there was someone else if he ever left the ranch. But he doesn’t.”
“Gideon would never cheat on you. Why would you say that?”
“He sure as hell isn’t interested in me these days. When I got back to our place after being fired by Damon, Gideon was there having a Jameson, and I thought, ‘Great, he’s done for the day.’ I started blowing off some steam over what happened, and I got really worked up. No one’s ever fired me before. And I was feeling low. Do you know what Gideon’s reaction was?”
I sat up straight, not liking how he said that. “What?”
“Nothing, Khloe. Nada.”
My eyes went wide. “What do you mean nothing?”
“What the hell do you think nothing means? He waited until my rant finished. He got up with his scotch, told me it was no big deal, and suggested I let it go. Then he went to bed without me.”
My jaw dropped. “He didn’t!”
“And he was back in the lab before I woke this morning. The man’s avoiding me.”
“Wow. That doesn’t sound like Gideon.”
“I told you, it’s been like this for weeks, but last night was proof positive I’m not imagining things. He won’t talk about anything he does. Won’t even talk about my junk. His mind is completely elsewhere. It’s awful, Khloe.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Yeah, me, too. I don’t know what I’m going to do.”
“You’re not going to do anything. Talk to him. Tell him how you’re feeling.”
“I would if he’d let me.”
“Do you want me to drop some hints to him about how you’re feeling?” I offered. “Maybe see what his reaction is?”
“God, that would be too pathetic. But things are weird between us.”
“It’s totally weird.” For some reason, Cody’s lamenting over Gideon brought to mind my strange morning with Damon. “Damon’s acting strange today, too.”
“Still?”
I ignored the still. “He’s pretending he’s not annoyed with me when I know he is. He has every right to be angry with me over yesterday. I took your side over his, and Damon’s prickly about those kinds of things. He hardly talked over breakfast, and when I called him out on it, he laughed it off.”
“At least you two had breakfast together. I’d be thrilled if Gideon stuck around in the morning to eat with me.”
“We always have breakfast together, but it just felt—I hate to say it again—weird. Like there’s something going on with him, and he’s all intense and quiet. I tried to get him to open up about it, but he won’t.”
“Maybe it’s just cabin fever,” Cody suggested reasonably. “Maybe you two have been isolated together so long you’re just imagining stuff and stirring things up over nothing. Stirring things up and having sex are your two favorite pastimes, girl.”
I felt my cheeks heat. That was certainly harsh. True, but harsh. “You’re probably right.”
“You want to hang out today? In my frame of mind, being alone until Gideon’s home and doing nothing but thinking about shit wouldn’t be good.”
I pouted. “No, it wouldn’t, and what kind of friend would I be to leave you alone while you’re down? Once Damon takes off to go to work in his study, I’ll text you. It’s supposed to get really cold today. We can binge on Iordanov and Oreos while we watch our series.”
“Yeah, that’s a great idea. Get you drunk, Khloe. Can’t imagine what Damon would do over that.”
“Not funny. Stop it. And try not to obsess over Gideon. Whatever it is, I’m sure it’s nothing. You two will work it out.”
“Right back at you, girl. You and Damon are rock solid. Don’t look for problems when there aren’t any.”
The memory of how we’d made love the night before flashed through my head—Damon’s face as he thrust into me, his touch, his mouth—and sensation erupted across my body. I wondered if I was looking for problems when there weren’t any. It was definitely worth spending some time to consider. “See you soon.”
Chapter Eighteen
Khloe
The Past
I’D JUST FINISHED dressing when Damon reappeared from the kitchen. He looked surprised I was no longer in my pj’s and a bit apprehensive, which was to be expected considering how I’d acted earlier. That I wasn’t still in my jammies meant no sexy time this morning, usually an indication I wanted to keep a discussion going for a while. But that wasn’t it. Talking with Cody had gotten my perspective back, and he hadn’t even mouthed his favorite advice to me: Don’t stir shit when there isn’t any, girl.
“It’s safe to come in,” I said with an apologetic smile. “That I’m dressed for the day doesn’t mean we’re going to keep fighting. Cody’s kinda down, and I think he could use some quality best-friend time.”
He quirked a brow. “I didn’t think we were fighting or worry that it would continue.”
I rolled my eyes and decided to let that go. I didn’t really want to argue with him anyway, especially over something that seemed silly now.
Damon settled in a chair, watching me as I pulled on my UGG boots. “Everything all right with Cody?”
“He thinks Gideon’s checked out on their relationship and they’re fizzling. Too much focus on work and not enough alone time. It’s really hitting him hard.”
Damon’s smile faded. “I’m going to assume you convinced him otherwise. I haven’t seen any indication they’re in tr
ouble.”
“Neither have I, but you can’t know what happens in a couple’s alone time.”
“It’s not surprising they’re going through some adjustment with all the recent changes,” Damon replied thoughtfully. “Gideon’s got a new job. There’s a learning curve, and I’m sure he wants to impress Dr. Hern.”
I nodded. “I hadn’t thought of it that way. But you’re probably right, Damon. I’m sure that’s all it is.”
“You really care about Cody, don’t you?”
“Of course. We’ve been friends my entire life. I want the best for him, and Gideon is exactly the type of person he deserves. I can’t stand the thought of him being unhappy. He was the one person I could trust and talk to about anything…before you.”
Damon came to me then, catching me by the nape. “They’ll be OK, Khloe.”
“Yes, but right now he’s torn up.” I melted into the play of his fingers at the back of my neck. It was gentle and comforting. “I don’t think he expected things to change so quickly between them. And I can’t imagine why they would. They were so happy together. It’s awful to think happiness can disappear that quickly between two people who love each other.”
He was silent for a beat then said, “Don’t get too emotionally invested in their struggles. They’re going to be fine. We’re all going to be fine. I’m sure of it.”
I nuzzled into him. “You’re right.”
Damon kissed me and then headed into the bathroom for his shower.
LAZY SATURDAY, WYOMING style. It felt special, even if it wasn’t much different than it was in California. There was no difference at all if one didn’t count the blazing fire in the hearth, the heavy snow falling beyond the windows, or that Cody and I were lounging on a five-hundred-year-old bed engraved with the Deverell royal crest inlaid with gold. It had formerly resided in a palace before Damon had it shipped here.
No one had bothered us for hours. It was strange for Damon not to pop in to check on me, but I reminded myself not to stir shit where there wasn’t any and clicked the DVR to load another episode of the reality show Cody loved. We were down one bag of Oreos and nearly to the season finale; I worried that it was Cody’s way of putting a harmless dig into Gideon to watch it with me instead of his partner, but I was relieved that Cody seemed more upbeat.