Keras’s hand flew to his right trouser pocket and he clutched it.
In a way that looked awfully defensive to Enyo.
Roused fear in her veins.
“What pills are they talking about?” A heavy weight pressed down on Enyo’s chest as he tightened his grip on his pocket and glared at her.
“I cannot give them to Ares,” he barked.
Shook his head.
Backed off a step.
“Why not?” Valen asked.
“He cannot have one.” Keras levelled a black look on all his brothers.
“But if it can help—” Megan started.
“He cannot have one.” Keras cut her off.
To Enyo, and some of his brothers judging by their faces, it looked an awful lot like Keras didn’t want to give Ares a pill because he didn’t want to sacrifice one rather than he was worried it would harm his brother or not work.
Megan made a desperate lunge for Keras’s right hand.
Keras raised it and halted with it in the air, and shock rippled through everyone present.
Because Keras had been on the verge of backhanding Megan.
He probably would have killed the mortal Carrier with the blow.
Definitely would have harmed her unborn child.
Disgust rolled through Enyo.
Keras’s brothers’ faces bore the same feeling as they stared at him.
For a moment in the garden, she had felt that Keras was the same person he had always been, that she had been mistaken about the changes in his personality. Now, she felt like a fool for thinking that. Keras had changed, had grown darker just as she had suspected.
And she had a terrible feeling the pills he was so desperate to protect and keep to himself were the source of that change in him.
“Ares isn’t equipped to handle the pills,” Keras snarled, black invading the emerald of his irises as he turned on his brothers. “That was the only reason I stopped her.”
Cass eased onto her feet and gently took hold of Megan’s shoulders, guiding the stunned female away from Keras as she stared him down. “There’s something seriously wrong with you. First, you goad me into striking you several times, and now you almost hit Megan.”
The disgusted looks on his brothers’ faces turned to horror upon hearing that.
The same emotion that rolled through Enyo as she stared at Keras, as he didn’t deny that he had goaded the witch into hitting him. Why?
“What the hell is wrong with you?” Daimon bit out, coming to stand in front of Cassandra and Megan, shielding them from Keras.
Enyo shook her head as she kept her gaze on Keras, seeing a different man from the one she had known in the Underworld, one far darker than she had suspected in Paris and at the gate in Tokyo.
That weight on her chest grew heavier as something dawned on her.
What he had done at that gate.
He had changed in the blink of an eye, going from violent and bloodthirsty, to calm.
Because he had taken a pill.
That was the reason he had stood with his back to her, had done something with his hands and had tipped his head back. He had been taking one of these pills his brothers and their women knew about.
A pill that supposedly suppressed his power.
A pill that she feared did far more than that.
She needed to prove it though, wouldn’t be able to rest until she knew for certain. She needed to see these pills were a source of the change in him, had stolen the man she loved and turned him into something else.
Into a cold, unfeeling monster.
“I know what is wrong with you,” she whispered.
Wishing that she didn’t.
When he looked across at her, his green eyes bleak but laced with that terrible hunger for violence she had seen in them before, she lunged for him.
Ripped his hand away from his pocket and twisted the pill box from his grip.
And teleported.
Chapter 7
Enyo shook as she landed on a rooftop in Tokyo, in another area of the city where a cluster of skyscrapers towered, aware that Keras would find her. Her pulse raced and her hands trembled, breath stuttering as she fumbled with the small black stone box. She managed to ease the lid open.
Cold wind buffeted her as she stared at the tiny onyx oval pills it contained, chilling her skin just as they chilled her heart.
She wasn’t sure what to do with them. Try one? She swallowed thickly at the thought, worry about what they might do to her rendering her immobile.
If they affected Keras in the way she suspected, then she would be vulnerable if she took one. His brothers believed they dampened his power, and she suspected they dampened other things too.
Like his feelings.
If she took a pill, she would find out for sure if they did, but she would also inhibit her powers, and she had the feeling she was going to need them when Keras caught up with her.
A vicious snarl pealed around her.
Enyo tensed and clutched the box to her black and silver breastplate, her gaze leaping to Keras where he stood on the other side of the flat roof to her.
She hadn’t expected him to find her so quickly.
“Give them back,” he snarled and stalked towards her, the wind picking up with each step he took.
Enyo stood her ground. “What are these pills? What is going on with you?”
“Nothing,” he barked and the roof beneath her trembled, had her looking down at it and then at him, growing aware that she was on dangerous ground. His eyes darkened, the black spreading, and crimson shone faintly around his pupils. Very dangerous ground. He wasn’t just angry with her for taking the pills—he was furious. He drew down a breath and his shoulders relaxed a notch, the roof going still again and the wind dropping. “They suppress my powers.”
She frowned at him, keeping the box pressed close to her chest. “Is that all they suppress?”
His face blackened again. “I told you, they suppress my powers. That is all. Now give them back.”
He held his hand out to her and she didn’t miss the fact his nails were black claws.
She looked down and uncurled her hand enough that she could see the box nestled against her palm. “If I was to take one—”
“No,” he bellowed and took a hard step towards her as a blast of frigid wind shoved at her. He caught himself and eased back. He softened his tone, even smiled, a hollow one that broke her heart, because he was lying to her, saying and doing whatever it took to get his precious pills back. “I do not want them to hurt you, that is the only reason I stopped you. I did not want to risk harming Ares.”
Tears lined her lashes and burned her nose as she looked into his eyes, as her heart broke a little more.
“You’re lying to me,” she husked, unable to get her voice above a whisper as her throat tightened, as pain pressed down on her. “I have noticed, and apparently so have your brothers. I have seen how these pills affect you. So stop lying to me. Stop lying to yourself.”
His face softened further.
And then twisted into a black snarl as he advanced on her, all the light leaving his eyes, cold replacing the warmth that had been building in them. The wind built again, pulling strands of her black hair loose, whipping it against her cheeks.
“You don’t understand a damned thing about me,” he growled, flashing short fangs that grew before her eyes. “Two hundred years in this world. Two hundred years—”
He bared those fangs at her.
The air darkened, as if all the light was being sucked from the world.
Shadows danced around Keras’s feet.
Crimson lit his eyes.
She curled her fingers around the box and readied herself, fear for Keras becoming fear for herself as she faced him, as the roof began to shake again, the very air around her trembling as the power Keras always emitted rose swiftly.
She had seen Hades in a rage, and had seen Keras lose his temper more than once, and she knew
not to push him. He wouldn’t mean to hurt her, but there was a chance the darkness inside him would seize control and pull a reaction from him before he could stop himself.
But she couldn’t give up, not when she felt she was getting somewhere.
“The pills are affecting you, Keras,” she said, keeping her voice soft, not hiding any of the concern she felt, hoping it would reach him and calm him. She didn’t want to hurt him. She didn’t want to fight him. “I do not like the man they turned you into.”
He drew to a halt and stared at her, all the fires of the Underworld raging in his scarlet eyes.
The shadows around his feet snapped and lashed at the rooftop.
The air around her darkened further.
“Are you only capable of this now?” she whispered, the weight in her heart growing heavier as he stared her down, as she saw the full depth of what he had become in their time apart. “Are you only capable of violence and anger? Can’t you smile anymore? Laugh? Cry? Love?”
Her voice hitched on the last word.
Tears filled her eyes, her brow furrowing as she burned with the need to go to him, with the need to somehow make him better again, to calm this darker side of him and restore him to the man she had once known.
His expression blackened, his voice a deep snarl. “There is no need for me to feel those emotions. There is no reason for me to have them. They only bring me pain and I have suffered for two hundred years because of them.”
His right hand slammed into the centre of his chest, his fingers splayed at first before he curled them, digging claws into his shirt, tearing the black material.
“I’m dead inside… empty… and I’m glad of it. I do not want to feel.”
He disappeared.
Reappeared right in front of her and lunged for her hand.
Enyo was swift to teleport again as her heart shot into her throat and raced there. Adrenaline surged, shock making her legs tremble beneath her as she landed on another roof.
Keras appeared a second later in black smoke that swirled around him, caressed his shoulders and lingered, transforming into shadows that loomed ominously above his head and around his feet.
Waiting to strike.
He fixed her with a dark, lethal glare. “Give them back, Enyo.”
His voice dripped with venom, with a warning she knew she should heed, but she couldn’t. Giving him back the pills would solve nothing, and she couldn’t surrender them when she felt she was getting somewhere, uncovering the truth about them, discovering something she could use to help him overcome his need of them.
“What do they do?” She wanted to look at the pills again but didn’t dare draw his focus to them.
“Give them back. I need them.” He held his left hand out to her, the stern lines of his face telling her that he was losing patience, liable to resort to violence to get them if she didn’t return them as he wanted.
“No.” She stood her ground, didn’t flinch when he growled like a beast at her, baring sharp white daggers. “Tell me what they do.”
“I need them to control my power.” An answer, but not the one she wanted.
It revealed something to her though. He was stronger now in some ways, but weaker in others. He was dependent upon the pills, as she had suspected.
“Control it without them.” Her tone was hard, cold, but she didn’t care. Now wasn’t the time to be soft with him. He needed to be pushed, not coddled. He needed to face facts. She stared him down, tipped her shoulders back and lifted her chin. “Ares and Daimon have learned to control their power. You can too. You’ve had two centuries in this world to learn how to contain it yourself, without these pills. Have you even tried?”
“I can’t,” he growled and stretched his hand towards her, the light growing dimmer as clouds gathered overhead and the wind picked up, rapidly building from a gentle breeze to a hurricane. Enyo planted her feet to the rooftop. Keras’s eyes darkened to the colour of blood. “I need them. They stop the pain.”
His claws sank into his flesh, tearing grooves in his chest.
“You are not hurt. What pain?” She kept pressing, guilt churning her stomach as his face crumpled, as that pain he spoke of finally broke to the surface and filled his eyes with tears.
“The pain that tears me apart each day that I am here, in this wretched realm.” He snarled each word, filling them with rage rather than hurt.
Fury she had the feeling he had been carrying inside him for two centuries.
Rage she feared was her fault.
He staggered a step forwards, the wind buffeting him, tousling his black hair as he reached for her.
For the pills.
Enyo slipped her hand behind her back. “You do not need them.”
“I do.” His eyes brightened dangerously.
“You’re addicted.” It came out harsh, full of the anger and disappointment that filled every inch of her, beat in her heart and brought tears to her eyes.
He had been such a strong man once. Steady. Capable. He had lectured her about her habit of relying on ambrosia whenever she felt down, using the potent brew to lift her spirits and make herself forget how miserable her brother made her. He had helped her kick that habit.
Well, now she was going to help him kick his.
“Do they make you numb?” she bit out, using words he had once spoken to her in anger against him. “Do you like to feel nothing?”
He snarled, his handsome face twisting in dark lines. “You don’t understand. You could never understand. Give them back to me.”
Red lightning split the sky in the distance.
The storm clouds gathering over the city turned pitch-black.
Like shadows.
Something inside her pushed her to act.
She tipped the pills onto the roof before she could consider the consequences and crushed them with her foot.
Keras stared at the ground, at her feet. She backed away a step, breath stuttering, heart beating painfully hard against her ribs, deeply aware of the terrible thing she had just done.
He fell to his knees and scrambled forwards, desperately tried to pick up the pieces of the pills, scraping the dust together. The tempest caused by his out-of-control emotions caught it and blew it away, and he sank back on his heels and watched it scattering in the breeze, a despondent look on his face.
That morphed into rage.
Suddenly, he was on his feet right before her and she didn’t see the blow coming, didn’t have a chance to block it.
He backhanded her.
Hard.
Enyo’s ears rang as she hit the roof, as she tumbled across it and tried to catch up, shock rolling through her together with sorrow.
When she stopped on her front, she pushed herself up and pressed her hand to her throbbing right cheek, her eye on that side twitching and watering as pain and heat spread across her face.
She stared at Keras. “Tell me again that you are not addicted.”
He stared right back at her, his scarlet eyes wide, horror shining in them.
It was quick to fade, giving way to rage again. “You don’t understand. I need them.”
“Like an addict needs a fix?” she spat as she staggered onto her feet and tried to shake off the blow. Her head turned violently, sending the world spinning, and she almost fell back to her knees as the wind howled around her, slapping the pointed slats of her skirt against her thighs and blowing her hair into her face. She clawed the onyx strands back and glared at Keras. “It isn’t the dampening of your powers you need. It’s the dampening of your feelings.”
He sank to his knees again, pathetically tried to gather the remnants of the pills, his voice quiet as he said, “You don’t understand. I need them. I cannot bear it.”
He stilled.
Clawed at the rooftop.
Enyo stormed towards him, grabbed him by his collar and hauled him onto his feet. “You are ridiculous.”
He snorted at that. “Look who is talking.”
Regret crossed his features, shame that bloomed inside her too, because he was right. She could hardly judge him when she had spent centuries battling an ambrosia addiction. But she had battled it. She had fought it and she had won, or at least she had won a few of the wars between her and her dependence upon the drink. Sometimes she slipped. Sometimes the pain became too much.
Which was why she could understand the appeal of his pills.
She could understand everything he was going through.
And he knew it.
It was right there in his eyes.
His pretty speeches might have worked on his brothers, but she was acquainted with the dark beast that was addiction.
Phenomenal pain flooded his eyes, rushed into her too.
“Make me understand,” she whispered, letting her anger fall away, shifting all of her focus to him. “Talk to me. You know I have been through this… You were there for me. I am here for you. Tell me what you are going through so I can help you.”
His scarlet gaze shifted downwards.
To the damned pill dust.
She summoned rain.
It saturated them both in a split-second, washing away the remains of the pills.
He bit out a vile curse and lightning split the sky, vivid crimson against the pitch-black clouds.
“Tell me what’s wrong, Keras,” she murmured softly.
His gaze lifted to lock with hers. His eyes filled with remorse, with defeat—with suffering. She had never seen him so weak and unguarded. He fell to his knees, slipping from her grip, and sank forwards, planting his hands against the slick rooftop.
“I can’t do this anymore,” he whispered, his voice so low she struggled to make out what he had said over the roar of the wind.
“Do what?” She kept her voice soft, warm, hoping it would soothe him enough that he would speak with her about what was happening to him, because she needed to help him.
A pause.
“Live without you.”
He curled up and wrapped his arms around himself, clutching his wet black shirt, pulling it tight across his back as he shivered, trembling badly.
Her heart went out to him.
Broke for him.
She eased down into a crouch and touched his shoulder, guilt churning her stomach to hot acid, awareness that this addiction was her fault strengthening her need to help him through it. “I am here now. You do not need these pills anymore. I will not go anywhere. Never again.”
Keras: Guardians of Hades Series Book 7 Page 8